speckledgingermug:
bucktoothedbushyhaired:
Hermione’s mouth dropped open and she stared after Harry’s vanishing form in outraged indignation. She turned to Ron, looking for support – but of course, he hadn’t been outside for the conversation, so he would have no idea how unreasonable Harry was being. How dare he just decide they were going in? How dare he just decide they didn’t need to keep watch? The part that rankled the most was that he was right; there was no sense in any of them sitting miserably through a blizzard when the weather itself would work better than any ward at keeping unwanted visitors away – but he wasn’t right about the rest of it, and this conversation wasn’t over.
She shook her head furiously at Ron – not furious at him but rather with Harry, although expecting Ron to commiserate when he as yet had no idea what was going on might be demanding a bit much – and stomped into the tent in Harry’s wake. The icy flakes that had collected in her hair started to soften and melt when they hit the heat from Ron’s fire and in a few minutes, Hermione knew, her usual unruly mane would be a nightmare mixture of dry static and damp strands, but her hair was low on her list of frustrations right now.
At the top of the list was Harry, and Hermione lost no time in making that clear: “This conversation isn’t over, Harry! You can’t just keep brushing-off reality just because it’s unpleasant. I don’t like the idea either, you know – it’s not as though learning the most revolting secrets of Dark Magic was ever on my to-do list!” The only reason her voice didn’t grow shrill as she spoke was because it started that way. The argument with Harry outside had been heated but soft, neither of them perhaps wanting to discuss such topics loudly – but now Hermione’s temper overrode any squeamishness – or sent of tact.
“We’ve been at this for two years – two years!” It still seemed unfathomable; how could they possibly be coming up on their second miserable Christmas out here? Sometimes it felt like only a few weeks had passed since that lovely dance with Ron at his brother’s wedding; sometimes it felt like a lifetime. But they couldn’t go on like this; they were fraying, physically and mentally, and they weren’t the only ones. The news they got was scattershot, suspect; but things were bad. Two years of a magical world ruled by You-Know-Who and his Death Eaters? Sometimes Hermione was glad that they were as out-of-touch as they were; she has come to realize that there were some things even she didn’t always want to know.
Others, she didn’t want to know but she was coming to understand they needed to learn. “It’s time to get off your high-horse and accept that we need to do whatever it takes to end this! You’re leaving everybody in danger by being so – so self-righteous, so selfish!“ Hermione could feel her eyes filling with frustrated tears and jerked away before Harry could see them. She turned to Ron instead and said, perhaps more insistently than she should have, “Go on Ron, tell him!”
@speckledgingermug
It was winter, but Ron couldn’t tell if the bitter chill in the air came from the weather or the looks on his friends’ faces. He cast his gaze between them, just once, and they needn’t have said a word. His stomach dropped, just as it had a moment before - he almost forgot he wasn’t wearing the locket. Harry’s words were sharp, unnecessarily commanding, and Ron’s brow crinkled. He looked sideways at Hermione, who shook her head at him like he should have understood…And he didn’t, necessarily. He didn’t know what they were talking about before he interrupted, but the pieces slid together as he followed them both inside (he wasn’t going to say he minded spending the night indoors anyhow).
His brows went from knitted to lifted, and something quite like fear flashed across his face; he could safely say he hadn’t expected Hermione to be the first to snap, and he certainly wasn’t expecting it to be as…terrifying as it was. That fear, however, wasted no time morphing into anger, and he was surprised to find it directed at Harry. He might not have known the exact details of what they’d discussed outside, but Hermione took the words right out of his mouth and out of his mind, buried deep but seemingly powerless against her. They’d been getting enough snippets of news for him to know his family was safe - or at least as safe as a blood-traitor family could be in such a climate - but two years of no details and two years of constantly fraying nerves was not a recipe for confidence. Ron moved forward, slower than the fire in his belly urged him. He wondered why he wasn’t angrier, but it was a slow burn; he felt it growing, spreading across the stomach that had been down to his ankles not a second before.
“Tell him what, Hermione?” It was almost a groan. He knew he was bound to break at some point, but he didn’t expect it to be tonight. He also knew what she meant, at least mostly, and he swallowed hard. “Mate, two years is a long time, and we’re not even close to finding the rest of the horcruxes. You know it.”
@carriesdeath
They both followed him inside as they knew he would, but there was part of Harry that wished he had just walked into the blizzard and been sucked up by the wind. He didn’t want to be around them right now - he didn’t want to be around anyone right now - but that was the problem with the tent... you were only alone when you were washing or keeping watch. There was no in-between. And, for a bloke who had spent the first eleven years of his life in a cupboard, it was too much most of the time. He needed space from them to think.
Harry stopped briefly, touching the locket that was off all their necks for a while gently. His fingers twitch, readying to snatch up the chain and fling it around his neck, when Hermione kept speaking and Harry’s hand closed into a fist. Another hour - maybe two - then he’d put it on first. The other two could have a longer break. Hermione, of course, didn’t want to be done with her insane idea of turning themselves into Death Eaters. Harry didn’t want to hear it. He’d heard it already - he wasn’t about to go there! Couldn’t she see what would happen to him (to all of them!) if they did?
He turned around to level her in the eye, his hand still in it’s fist down by his side, the other clutching at his wand like always these days. She reminded him of how long and Ron agreed instantly. It made Harry want to roll his eyes - of course Ron agreed with her! As though Harry hadn’t seen the way they sometimes got too close, their fingers brushing against one another. As if Harry hadn’t noticed how they often looked at him worriedly or talked to one another in hushed whispered, falling asleep together peacefully. They were leaving him behind in a different sort of way. After the war, they could figure this out, if they already hadn’t and were just keeping it a secret from him. After the war... Harry couldn’t even see beyond it.
“You don’t think I know that?” he said through gritted teeth, but Hermione continued as though she didn’t hear him. And what she said had Harry’s heart dropping into his stomach, his anger growing. The insecurity, the idea that people were out there dying by Voldemort because he, Harry, could not find the final way to defeat him. There was knowledge that much of the world thought Harry had abandoned them - it was all over the wireless and even Fred and George’s constant optimism couldn’t convince people that Harry was alive and trying.
He’d thought he had Ron and Hermione on his side, at the very least. He thought they knew he was doing his best. “I KNOW, HERMIONE!” And he got loud, despite the fear that they might be caught one day. He forced himself to lower his voice, though it didn’t stop the anger from coming through - didn’t stop the dangerous lilt that was proof he couldn’t delve into the Dark Arts. “I know people are dying because of me, you don’t have to remind me that! And if you two are so tired of doing this, then just go! I can’t leave - it’s me or him. You knew what you were signing up for but, if two years is too long for you and you’re done fighting, then go! I’m not becoming a dark wizard just because you don’t think there’s another way! I’m not doing that!”
@bucktoothedbushyhaired