ur local dummy

| butch lesbian | 17 | 5’3” | sw;155lbs/cw;151lbs/gw;125lbs/gw2; 115lbs ugw; 105lbs | my place to vent | pro recovery, you deserve a healthy relationship with food |

[casually-bothered]

i don’t get it. i never blinked twice at peanut butter and i never really cared for it but now it’s become a fear food??? i see it an i go ape shit???? and i end up eating spoonful after spoonful??? what the fuck???

[casually-bothered]

do you ever eat so much you can’t breathe bc same

[moonshinebones-deactivated20191]

[darling-im-starving-blog]

current weight: “wouldn’t hurt if you didnt eat today”

[casually-bothered]

when it’s only the afternoon and you’ve already ate 1400cals 🤡🤡🤡🤡

[casually-bothered]

i was wanting to do a 3 day fast but couldn’t dodge my 8pm cravings but thankfully i hadn’t eaten all day and managed to keep what i ate under 1000kcals. i’m not gonna lie, it felt good so i think i’ll start doing the OMAD diet from now on. with more planning, of course, to keep my macros in check.

[casually-bothered]

i feel like i’d have a much easier time losing weight if i had a weight loss buddy. at the same time, though, i’m really competitive and i’m worried that i’d just bring them down to unhealthy habits like mine. but a part of me just needs someone who understands what i’m going through.

[casually-bothered]

aaaaaaaand another day of overeating :(. honestly i am partly to blame because i KNOW i shouldn’t be in the kitchen after 5pm. my urges to eat just get too strong and once i start i can’t stop. but if i don’t at least make a presence then i have to hear my mom bitch and complain about how “nobody helps clean in the house” and whatever the hell she wants to nit pick at. i have to learn to care less.

[casually-bothered]

whenever i binge i sing this song about how much i hate myself so that’s where i am in this hellish existence.

[casually-bothered]

i’ve been taking monthly pictures of my body and i’m always in a shitty mood when i do cause i realize that i make no improvement in my body. it’s been months now. what the fuck. what more do i have to do?

[casually-bothered]

it’s not fair that i want to lose weight so fucking bad and have wanted to for a good 6 YEARS and it’s become so physically impossible for me to do that. it’s too easy for me to give in to my stupid brain telling me to eat and eat and eat. JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!! at this point i’m gonna need someone to hold me accountable for this bullshit. i’m just so tired. i hate eating. i really really REALLY hate eating.

[casually-bothered]

i binged today so i made myself a list of 40+ things to do instead of eating (specifically for tomorrow) and the goal is to complete every single thing on that list before i even THINK about eating

i made it so i wouldn’t be able to complete the whole thing before tomorrow ends. it’s basically impossible. and if i have to carry it on till saturday, then i hope i still won’t eat until i mark off everything on that list.

we’ll see how this goes.

[casually-bothered]

right. so i failed. miserably. didn’t even get to check 2 things off before i binged. fuck. starting again tmrw.

[casually-bothered]

i binged today so i made myself a list of 40+ things to do instead of eating (specifically for tomorrow) and the goal is to complete every single thing on that list before i even THINK about eating

i made it so i wouldn’t be able to complete the whole thing before tomorrow ends. it’s basically impossible. and if i have to carry it on till saturday, then i hope i still won’t eat until i mark off everything on that list.

we’ll see how this goes.

[casually-bothered]

i used to effortlessly restrict to 500-700 cals a day and now i can’t even eat less than 1200.... it feels like a failure somehow

[wintergir1s]

💛💫🔮🌻🌿💝🌼👙🐞🍄🌞🍀🔮✨🧡

A charm to lose 50+ lbs by July

💛💫🔮🌻🌿💝🌼👙🐞🍄🌞🍀🔮✨🧡

Like to charge reblog to cast

[angeliclyhigh]

im not gonna risk it

[ange1lines]

HaHAhAhA give this to me- pleaseee

[casually-bothered]

i’d be at my ugw 😔✌🏽 pleaaaaaase

[casually-bothered]

right so i guess seeing little changes in my body was enough for my brain to go “fuck it, let’s binge” ??? logic??? where tf is it????

this has happened whenever i see changes in myself and the scale. i’m so fucking tired of it. i’m gonna refuse to look at myself if this is the case. fuck it.

is this smth other people can relate to or am i just weird??

[casually-bothered]

going to bed hungry shouldn’t feel good but here i am..... going to bed hungry..... feelin good