RECOVERY.
(tw- now/then pictures)
i have been working very hard to recover these past few months and it’s actually going well. u don’t have to read this but i want to share what i did that helped me and also answer questions.
first i started going to soulcycle.
i initially was planning on continuing to starve myself and also burn 700-800 calories at a blacked out room with blasting music on a bike not going anywhere, however the community around fitness where i live has (unknowingly) played the biggest part in my recovery.
the riders: all body shapes and sizes in sports bras and biker shorts is actually really therapeutic for a lot of reasons; u can’t isolate urself at soulcycle like u can at school, it’s a social place. these gorgeous women are also cheering you on while you work out. if you get close enough to them they might even invite you out to burritos or sweetgreen after class. eating with healthy women that you just sweat ur ass off with is LIBERATING AS FUCK.
the instructors: i don’t know where to begin. these people who work out for A LIVING are muscular, healthy, and happy. one of the female instructors at my studio has the same body type as me and it makes me so confident to watch her run a class. they also just have your back always. the instructors are always cheering you on, making you feel worth it, and making you feel valuable. actually, one of my fav instructors at the studio introduced me to this other rider a few weeks ago, who turns out to be a instructor at a place called solidcore. so now i also attend classes at her gym. the community just builds on top of itself.
OVERALL, knowing that i can workout better, feel better, and get better by eating protein, makes it really easy to not keep track of calories but protein intake.
EVERYONE KNOWS PROTEIN IS GOOD FOR YOU! so instead of trying to keep calories low focus on the amount of protein, and try to get the number as high as possible every day. protein makes your performance better every day and therefore is helping you workout to the fullest potential.
second, i have barely weighed myself- which was one of my biggest issues
i took pictures of my scale around 3x per day. at my lowest i was 87lbs. however, i went to get a checkup and realized when i went in, i had no idea how much i weighed because i haven’t felt the need to weigh myself in so long.
but here’s the best part. i’m literally 93 pounds. (i’m only 5ft tall.) however, at my worst i was 120, and because i know i’m healthy now (i’m working out 4-6x per week and not restricting food but staying away from unhealthy ones) i know that 93lbs is just a natural state for my body. keeping with the routine i have assures the fact i’ll stay right where i am, and i’m happy.
third, i stopped taking adderall. (lol)
LMFAO seems stupid, but i’d rather struggle in school then die so….
anyways here’s some photos at my lowest vs now.
this is a very big deal to me because i know the group of people i’m about to post this to and i know which one you’ll probably find more appealing- however, i’m so happy with myself that i can see past that.
I WISH ALL THE BEST FOR YOU. REACH OUT IF U NEED HELP. IM HERE.
before rec
now (during rec)
