ʰᵉˡˡᵒ, ʷʰᵃᵗ ᶦᶠ ᶦ ʷᵃˢ.... ᵖᵉʳʰᵃᵖˢ ᵐᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵃ ʳᵉˢᵉᵗ ᶠᵒʳ ʰᶦᶜᶜᵘᵖ??
KIROKAZE
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AnasAbdin

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if i look back, i am lost
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h
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@cesserimus
ʰᵉˡˡᵒ, ʷʰᵃᵗ ᶦᶠ ᶦ ʷᵃˢ.... ᵖᵉʳʰᵃᵖˢ ᵐᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵃ ʳᵉˢᵉᵗ ᶠᵒʳ ʰᶦᶜᶜᵘᵖ??
&& Call it minor curiosity, but hmu on @stubbornessissues if you see this post. I’ve been on a nostalgia trip to my old rp blogs and I’m just kinda curious who’s all still around
Y’all, I can’t decide on a new url bc I’m trash, pls help
The Savage Seas Squad is coming back!!!
aka me, @coronixn @hirada & @frystsnow
Look, I hardly have the heart in me to write this out the once let alone go out and apologise to every single person who’s been trying to contact me or that I’ve scared, so I’m going to write this, I’m going to schedule it for a few more times and then I’m done.
Simply existing is a monumental task right now. I try not to advertise it, but I’m sure that, at least those I talk to regularly know that I’ve not had a great turn of things the past few months. On wednesday they plummeted straight through rock bottom to the underworld of bad. I’ve been bored and a little lonely having a broken ankle, so a few friends thought it would be lovely to take me out to a meal, chip in to pay for it, help me out blah blah, they’re sweet people. Or were. The place we were heading to was in the next town over so it was a twenty minute drive after everyone was picked up.
We were on the road out of town, it was getting late and dark but things were nice and quiet because it was the middle of the week and some fucking idiot didn’t have his lights on and he was driving on the wrong fucking side of the road, straight towards us and we would have been fine if we hadn’t met him at the one and only bend on that road. Head on collision, car span, rolled, metal crumpled and there was glass breaking and all I knew was that only one person was making sounds, the one in the passenger seat in front of me and that moment is probably the most clear because she was coughing up a lot of blood and she was so terrified and I had to watch her drown in it, trapped by the weight of someone else’s body.
The fucking idiot who hit us got off easy, couple of cuts and bruises but otherwise unharmed and since I’m the only one who’s survived from out car I have to go to court and hearings and answer questions about the night and look this guy in the face and know he’s killed four of my friends who were just trying to be nice to me and do a good thing. I have to deal with their families hating me, because I was the reason they were going out, I was the only one who survived and no one will fucking treat me like a human being or talk to me normally and every time I so much as blink I’m remembering bits and pieces of it all in flashes.
So I’m god damn sorry for scaring people, for being selfish and taking care of myself for once. Maybe I did handle this the wrong way but I just can’t cope with anything any more, I just can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I don’t know how to function any more.
Look, I hardly have the heart in me to write this out the once let alone go out and apologise to every single person who’s been trying to contact me or that I’ve scared, so I’m going to write this, I’m going to schedule it for a few more times and then I’m done.
Simply existing is a monumental task right now. I try not to advertise it, but I’m sure that, at least those I talk to regularly know that I’ve not had a great turn of things the past few months. On wednesday they plummeted straight through rock bottom to the underworld of bad. I’ve been bored and a little lonely having a broken ankle, so a few friends thought it would be lovely to take me out to a meal, chip in to pay for it, help me out blah blah, they’re sweet people. Or were. The place we were heading to was in the next town over so it was a twenty minute drive after everyone was picked up.
We were on the road out of town, it was getting late and dark but things were nice and quiet because it was the middle of the week and some fucking idiot didn’t have his lights on and he was driving on the wrong fucking side of the road, straight towards us and we would have been fine if we hadn’t met him at the one and only bend on that road. Head on collision, car span, rolled, metal crumpled and there was glass breaking and all I knew was that only one person was making sounds, the one in the passenger seat in front of me and that moment is probably the most clear because she was coughing up a lot of blood and she was so terrified and I had to watch her drown in it, trapped by the weight of someone else’s body.
The fucking idiot who hit us got off easy, couple of cuts and bruises but otherwise unharmed and since I’m the only one who’s survived from out car I have to go to court and hearings and answer questions about the night and look this guy in the face and know he’s killed four of my friends who were just trying to be nice to me and do a good thing. I have to deal with their families hating me, because I was the reason they were going out, I was the only one who survived and no one will fucking treat me like a human being or talk to me normally and every time I so much as blink I’m remembering bits and pieces of it all in flashes.
So I’m god damn sorry for scaring people, for being selfish and taking care of myself for once. Maybe I did handle this the wrong way but I just can’t cope with anything any more, I just can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I don’t know how to function any more.
GUESS WHO’S COMING BACK! It’ll probably be tomorrow since I’ve got drafts on Ed & Fitz right now that take priority, but I’ve missed this fandom waaay too much so here’s a S T A R T E R C A L L for tomorrow when I finally get back
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides – If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides – If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides – If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides – If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides – If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
Indefinite Hiatus
I’ve kind of lost all will to write for Hiccup lately & I’ve got a lot to deal with, outside of rp, so running more than one blog is an issue anyway. I do adore you guys & Hiccup too much to not come back, but for now, I’m officially on hiatus until I get a more concrete schedule & my crying over Narnia subsides -- If you do ever want to reach me, I’ll always be checking either Edmund or my personal.
i, personally, would love to do replies, and yet
I swear down that I’m really trying to be on this blog & reply to drafts, but my brain is all locked up & I can’t function right.
It’s not like there isn’t air i n s i d e
I think there’s some power that wants me on this blog today. It’s 1pm and I’ve just received my third lot of violent hiccups since 9:30 this morning. But I’m super busy over on Ed and don’t feel like coming back here until I finish the pages off.