Lee Chaeyoung

[hgtaehwan]

one less sober night || taehwan & chaeyoung

[chaeyounghg]

hgtaehwan‌:

“yeah, no matter how many people love. there will always be twice as many trying to take you down.” he tries to sound airy, upbeat, but his smile turns a little sour as she promises to drink for the both of them. that was not exactly what he was trying to accomplish but he tries to shake the thought, tries not to pay too much attention to her finishing her drink in one go and answers her questions instead. “yeah, i know what it tastes like, don’t worry.” he chuckles,” the rule only goes for public events, they don’t really care for what i do at home. i mean, as long as i still show up to dance and voice rehearsals at least.”

“ah, exactly…” he chimes in with a chuckle, popping his hands in the pockets of his pants as he scans the crowd. “so, you sure you want my company tonight? because right now it sounds like you’ll either be stuck with the only sober guest at this party or you’ll fall victim to the wrath of millions of teenage girls. better run while you still can.”

he pays close attention to chaeyoung’s stride as they stray away from the bar. almost as if he was trying to measure her intoxication by the wobble of her heels. she seems fine, though. at least for now. “come on, you know that’s not what i meant. i was just making sure i wasn’t hogging too much of your time in case you had someone else to keep company..” he chuckles, takes a sip of his fruity drink before taking a look at the variety of snacks they had to offer. “if not, i offer my services. please feel free to take advantage of me in case you got your eye on anyone and are trying to make them jealous.”

“People are jealous, they’ll always be jealous, and have their own shit going on that even the most reasoning and and logic will not faze them and they’ll continue to be entitled little horrors that want to ruin everyone else,” she said. Her words were harsh, but true. Perhaps the alcohol was starting to loosen her lips, allowing her to express herself so openly. Not that Taehwan would mind, he had spent enough time with her that it wouldn’t come off as a surprise but for anyone eavesdropping it would be a different story. 

Chaeyoung nodded as he explained himself. “That makes sense,” she said. “They don’t pick on you for that too, though? Drinking like...the night before recording or voice practice? I can’t imagine that it can be good for vocal cords to strain them when they’re not 100%,” she frowned, but she wasn’t the expert here and could only assume how it worked in the music industry. 

At his subtle, playful threat, Chaeyoung waved a hand, dismissing it. “Haters gunna hate,” she said, a fact she knew very well to be true. “So I don’t care. It’s your call if you want to, I don’t mind. They’ll tear me down one way or another and it doesn’t bother me, I’m not fazed,” she shrugged. 

“I know, I know, I’m sorry,” she said. “But no one is waiting for me, I’m just by myself and you’re never hogging my time, you’re one of the few people in this community I enjoy spending time with,” she said, honest in her words. At his offer, she couldn’t help but laugh. She knew he meant it, would be willing to do that for her, regardless of how his fans reacted. “No, no, there’s no one that I feel that way about, so no one to make jealous tonight,” she said, before turning to look at him. “Are you hoping to catch someone’s eye? Because if so, I mean, if I can help...” she trailed off, brow raised, the gesture completing the sentence for her. 

[hrsminseok-deactivated20200621]

old time road || jaesung & chaeyoung

[chaeyounghg]

hgjaesung‌:

not the best question jae could have asked, he can tell from the tone of her voice. she sounds… tense. if not, the way she hesitated, silently questioned him with a cocked brow was enough for him to realize he fucked up. but he can’t exactly blame her, can’t say for sure that he wouldn’t have had the exact same reaction had it been the other way around. can’t say it wouldn’t have been 10 times worse.

but he had already dug himself a hole and there was no way of crawling back out, chewing his lip quietly as he wonders whether or not he should finish the thought he had already started to speak. the last thing he wanted to do was upset her, portray himself as yet another negative thing of her past.

“no, on the contrary…” jae eventually figured it would be worse to deflect now, make her think that she was indeed spoken badly of when she wasn’t. “it’s just… i figured it would hurt. to come back here.” he regrets the words almost as soon as he speaks them, wonders if he should make an excuse and leave this awkward conversation while he could.

“i’m sorry.” he ends up muttering, running a hand through his hair and softly pulling at the strands. “is there any way we could pretend i didn’t just ask any of that?”

The silence and awkwardness after her response was almost palpable. Chaeyoung’s appearance didn’t change, still composed the same way she had been before, regardless of how surprising the question was. She wasn’t mad, though. Things like this didn’t really anger her, all she would do is sigh, because that was best. 

When he finally spoke, she turned her attention to him, noting the look on his face, confirming that he had sensed what had gone wrong and regretted being so quick to make it into an issue when it wasn’t. “Hmm...” she said, pondering on his thought and taking a sip from her drink.

 “I guess I can understand that. But I don’t feel the pain anymore, so it doesn’t hurt.” A lie, but it wasn’t for him to worry about. 

At his apology, she looked at him once more. He was a good person. She always knew that, even if she didn’t know him well. She placed a hand on top of his arm and gave it a squeeze. “It’s fine, really. No harm, no foul,” she said, offering a smile. “But maybe we can leave this place. Otherwise I’ll drink your bar dry. Feel like going to karaoke?”

[chaeyounghg]

rekindle [chaeyoung&jisung]

[chaeyounghg]

hgjisung‌:

“for starters, i can show you how she looks like, at least.” with that, he took out his phone from his pocket and unlocked it. scrolling through a few pictures - some selfies of himself and then of random sceneries - he finally settled on one of sugar, curled up on her special basket completed with a soft pillow. just seeing that image made jisung smile. “there she is. a princess, as you can see. she practically owns my house.”

he rubs the back of his neck, unable to hide the small blush that came with her compliments. he wasn’t very good at taking them, after all. “ah, thank you. it means a lot, especially coming from you. if i ever stop being that way, you have permission to slap me back to reality.” her words of encouragement affected jisung in ways he couldn’t quite describe.

“oh, a good idea.” he nods, as if he noted that indirect suggestion down. “might get a few whispers here and there over why i’m suddenly wearing a bracelet everywhere, but i think it would be worth it if it means you’d stay as my friend.”

at the mention of those two groups, jisung’s eyes lit up. “ah, actually… i like them quite a bit. you say you have friends in nexus? wow…” he remembered encountering them in a showcase, and being a nervous wreck despite his expression not showing that. “i’m a little jealous, actually.”

Chaeyoung leaned in, peering at his phone as he scrolled through his album. She tried not to pay attention much, offering some sort of privacy in case he scrolled past a photo that wasn’t meant to be seen. 

Once he found the picture, she focused, leaning slightly closer to take a look. “Well you know, she actually looks really cute,” she said, meaning it. “And really a princess~ she looks like she’s lucky to have you,” she said, playfully patting his head. 

At his permission, Chaeyoung laughed. “Careful, because you know I’ll do just that,” she laughed. “But tell you what, if I ever feel like...you’re straying, I’ll talk to you first before I go around slapping you. The last thing we need is Dispatch to get involved...or Jessi roasting me,” she said, shuddering at the thought of falling victim to the resident gossip queen. 

“Let people keep guessing if they want, it won’t be your problem,” she said, although she knew it wasn’t as easy as that. “But okay, yes, of course, we’ll be friends forever, Jisung-ah, promise.”

“Really?” Chaeyoung said, surprised at his confession. “How come? Don’t you meet them too? I imagine you still see them more than I do.”

[hgminjoon]

no destination, on my way.

[chaeyounghg]

hgminjoon‌:

“couldn’t you just pretend to be terrible? i’m a great actor – but,” he shrugged, “ it doesn’t really matter, she would probably tell me to stop whining. i’m kind of the black sheep of the family. didn’t you know?” minjoon actually didn’t know just how much she had heard. obviously, no upstanding hwang geum resident would be dealing in drugs. but it was still hard to gauge just where he stood on the social ladder. his parents had gotten good at covering for him – they had years of practice. still, there was only so much that bribes and good old fashion power could do to hide the fact that he was far from the perfect son. he had stopped caring a long time ago. 

“for sure; i believe in all of that too. no sex before marriage, cereal before milk, beer and then soju – i’ve got it down.” he nodded. for all intents and purposes, jeon minjoon didn’t care. he didn’t have to mind himself. granted, his parents would likely be mad – not because they cared about that side of his life, so far they had refrained from commenting, but rather because chaeyoung was someone they chose. so whatever did happen between the two of them, mattered to the six of them. a bit crowded for his taste. 

“alright,” he nodded before shutting the fridge. he grabbed a pair of cups and, of course, shut the infamous drawer. there was a lonesome bag of chips in one of the cupboards – he grabbed that too. “follow me, i think i know a place.” in all fairness he had been living there for less than a week. the idea had been to show off, practicality wasn’t a priority. so he knew there was a balcony – the kind that let you see so far off into the distance that one could remember this too was seoul. but minjoon took a few wrong turns before finding the right door. 

“best view in kwangsun.”

“Of course I can pretend...lets be honest here, everyone here pretends...I wouldn’t be surprised if people have a mental breakdown because they’re having an identity crisis because they don’t know who they are,” she said. Again, a luxury that their world offered them and wouldn’t let them soon forget. 

Of course she knew. Somethings were hard to keep under wraps, even if details were not-so forthcoming. “You’re still her precious son. Do you think she would risk you with me if she thinks there’s big benefits for our families together?” she pointed out, hoping he thought better of himself. “I mean, you have some secrets,” she said, gesturing to the drugs. “But she doesn’t know about those, so you’re fine.” 

Chaeyoung couldn’t help but laugh. Sure, some things were common sense, like cereal before milk, but the sex before marriage concept was one that young people versus old people strongly differed on and in their case, the older people had more power, so you were stuck to oblige in order to survive. “It’s fine, what they don’t know won’t hurt them...or we can say we did it and maybe they’ll be ashamed and end it...that, or want us married faster. It can go really well or really badly.”

She followed his lead, noting how empty the place still felt, as though they were trespassers and were somewhere they shouldn’t be. She wondered if it was a work in progress or this was it. 

Once they reached the balcony, Chaeyoung took in the view, and it was beautiful. “Wow,” she said, admiring it. “I didn’t think a view like this could exist. But this is nice....it’s kind of relaxing. Peaceful.”

[chaeyounghg]

ohjamiehg‌:

      her words were enough to quickly end the train of thought that ran through her brain and she looked at the other , realising how their lives were actually quite different , but in a similar kind of way. jamie being jamie , rarely thought about how her life turned out , how different it would’ve been if the oh’s hadn’t adopted her , better yet , if her parents accepted her &. been like any other parents —- no , these thoughts were for late nights with ten drinks in. the better part of her day was reserved for concern regarding others , specifically the woman standing in front of her right now. 

        “ — that’s a pretty good idea , but i didn’t graduate too long ago &. come to think of it , you’re right… i didn’t miss out on much. ” she joked as a small laugh escaped. the fact that she was being the attention of the conversation for a little too long than that was comfortable instinctively made her want to end the conversation and digress to quite literally anything else. 

        as one of the staff members returned with the right size , jamie politely thanked her before taking the shoes and placing them in front of the younger . “ well , give it a try and we’ll see if you found —- your style. ” she teased before sighing , almost instantly regretting the authority she handed over to the younger. smiling shyly , she placed a hand over the back of her hand and nervously rubbed before nodding , “ we can check it out , i guess… —- but after , food !! ”  

“See?” Chaeyoung smiled. “I’m never wrong.” A lie, but given they were just having fun and keeping things light, they didn’t need to get into the details of that now. 

Once the shoes arrived, Chaeyoung took a seat and slipped them on and stood up, heading to the full length mirror to check it out. “Hmm....well, it doesn’t go with this outfit, but I do like it....so I’ll get these too, but I just won’t wear them out,” she nodded, before returning to her seat to change back. She also made a note to get the insoles to prevent blisters, because no matter how expensive shoes were, they loved to cause feet pain. 

Chaeyoung didn’t fail to notice the way Jamie was responding to the dress, and a part of her wanted to abandon the idea altogether, but doing so now would bring attention to Chaeyoung’s awareness, which would likely make the older more uncomfortable. “Don’t worry, it’s not mandatory to buy, just to try,” she said, offering a smile. “I won’t force you to buy it if you’re not feeling it, promise. And then yes, food!”

[chaeyounghg]

𝕃𝔼𝔼 ℂℍ𝔸𝔼𝕐𝕆𝕌ℕ𝔾 : ｇｉｆ　ｍｏｏｄ　ｂｏａｒｄ

[hgdaehan]

talkin’ trash

[chaeyounghg]

hgdaehan‌:

@chaeyounghg​

“that brand is traaaaaaaash.”

ironic because daehan knows shit about alcohol just that it takes like shit. what he does know is when the first shipment came in, a customer tried it and spit it back in his face. seriously for all the money they make someone of these classy assholes lack it.

then again, he’s got about as much class as knock off air force ones.  soooooooooo, complaining about class is not only irrelevant it’s hypocritical.

daehan isn’t drunk, he isn’t tipsy, in fact he hasn’t touched the can at all. instead he rests his chin in his palm, watching, waiting for a sign that chaeyoung is either all here or in the bottom of the beer can she’d been wiggling around.

sometimes she buys them and is on her way, smiles coming from ugly pits of embarrassment and obligatory social standards. other days they talk about the brands, he gives half-assed opinions and she comments when she comes back, a new flavor in tow. nowadays they sit outside when there’s no one coming to the store and the shift is so dark and lonely that he feels like spongebob waiting for the hash-slinging slasher.

chaeyoung, arguably slightly more comfortable, hangs around for these nights, not tipsy, not drunk, but somewhere in between. it’s a bit like their relationships, between acquaintances and friends. kind of like - tomatoes, somewhere between a fruit and a vegetable.

does it matter?

“belongs in the trash. came from the trash, tastes like trash.”

he raps nonsense and she sometimes laughs, so maybe not.

At first, Chaeyoung simply ignores the boy, finishing off the new can rather quickly. He’s not wrong, it is trash, but she doesnt care about flavour. That’s not what she drinks for, although he doesn’t know that.

He has paid witness to her habits for a long time. It wasn’t his decision, it wasn’t his choice, but he worked in a place where these things were easily accessible and Chaeyoung could be anonymous, a nobody if she wanted to. She could just come and go and not worry about being questioned. Plus, there was enough staff that it wasn’t always the same person at the counter every time, although Daehan seemed to be there more than anyone else. 

It didn’t matter, though. He was just doing his job, and he never questioned anything that she said or did, sober or otherwise.

“How is your manager going to feel if you’re promoting your beer by...well, bashing it? You still gotta sell it,” she pointed out, a smile on her lips. Not that it really mattered to her. She just enjoyed teasing the younger boy. 

“You should use those skills of yours to sell more stuff. Trust me, people will love it...except not the parents. They’re too...not hip with the youngsters to be able to laugh about it.” Although she was sure not many adults did visit, it was mostly young people that frequented the convenience store. 

“I’m already finished it, so I can’t even comment on the taste much, but you know what I do know? I need another one. These cans...bottles...they’re too small.” 

[chaeyounghg]

𝕃𝔼𝔼 ℂℍ𝔸𝔼𝕐𝕆𝕌ℕ𝔾 : ｍｏｏｄ　ｂｏａｒｄ

[hgminjoon]

no destination, on my way.

[chaeyounghg]

hgminjoon‌:

“it wouldn’t, but it does sound entertaining – for us at least.” and anything that could possibly upset their parents, and this whole arrangement they had planned out all by themselves, sounded good in his book. minjoon was far too old and worn out to pull any stunts. no – if he wanted out of this then a bit of scheming and planning would need to happen. no easy task considering the number of lawyers involved. either way, this was no time for serious plans.

the thought made him chuckle. “yeah right, i’m sure they’d be outraged. maybe call to check in and make sure our, er– meeting is going well.” and then again it would be fun to toy with their expectations, an eye for an eye sort of thing. “wow – look at this. you’re already making yourself at home. i would give you my bed, but i don’t really have one.” he said a little too proud of the fact. “and what about my reputation?” not that he had a particularly good one to uphold. he was, however, not sure if the rumor mill would be so kind to chaeyoung.

“i–” he paused for a moment, leaning on the kitchen counter. the call had been unexpected, and he was increasingly sedated by the smoke. but neither of those things were reason enough for whatever odd premonition had wondered into his head. no, this was about the obvious. what their parents had failed to see. it was her – minjoon and chaeyoung had always managed to miss each other hadn’t they? same friends, different circles. hwang geum was small, but it had allowed them to be worlds apart. now things would be different, and that soundedlike trouble to him. even if they managed to get out of marriage – the damage would be done. and then there was this whole situation – which felt like the ultimate test. would he give in and admit that he could never escape his parent’s shadow or would he take his chances in the real world? it all seemed a bit too much for one night. “i like the way you think.” 

he nodded and headed for the fridge. “we should be fine; unless we go out in public or, you know, start calling our exes.” the fridge was void of food, instead water and alcohol – far more than anyone could need filled it. “soju, wine, or vodka?” 

Chaeyoung smiled a little. “I think more than me. You might grow to resent me a little, since I would have to be terrible to you so your mom will worry about her precious son,” she said. It was a lot of big talk, of course, she knew she couldn’t do it, as much as she wanted to. She had already been trained to act a certain way around adults, around people older than her in order to keep up a good image. It was almost like an instinct, and it was hard to quit. 

“Oh yeah,” Chaeyoung snorted. “Or at least to remember to be safe so there’s no need to rush the wedding...because even in today’s day and age certain things should happen after marriage and if it happens before, then you’re just...a bad person, for lack of better words.” She could only imagine how her own parents would react. Likely they’d want measures taken to kill the idea of it before anyone else could ever find out. That, or as she had mentioned, rushing it to make it look like it happened at just the right time. 

The silence once again spoke loudly. I like the way you think. It felt like the only way to think right then and there, and the best person for either of them to have deal with it all was standing right in front of them. Or at least, that’s how Chaeyoung felt. Minjoon never questioned her, he simply acted and moved on, and she never questioned him either. Neither cared much to dig further but if they were forced to end up together, then only time would tell what would happen to them. Somehow, it felt like it would all just be a big mess.

Chaeyoung followed his lead, considering the options that he had presented her. “Lets just drink it all,” she said, reaching over to grab a few bottles of soju that she could carry. “I just don’t want to think anymore.” 

[vcsypha]

𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙨 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜

[chaeyounghg]

hgjoon‌:

     he finds her amusing, that his simple statement had irked such a response from her. he couldn’t hide the smirk that was perking up at his corners, it was also difficult to believe that at one point in his life he had seen her much more than some sort of distraction, merely used to better the name of his family. he had mistook such strong amusement and interest as… love and affection. two things that he had grown up without, such a profound acknowledgement that ravaged his system, and enraged his reverie. shrouded by a mist of confusion and a frustration that was fuelled by his own… misfortunes, ruined him. 

     hand still holding onto the bag that held his cupcakes, his other free hand moving to rake through his strands, “assuming that i’d like to know you is… oddly sentimental.” he huffs, his breath still fresh with the smell of cigarettes. 

     her next statement catches him off guard, almost having forgotten that he had given her such a thing. he had assumed its demise since the day she was left to wither and die, it came as a little surprise that perked his brows up above his hues. “other things to focus on?” he lets out a chuckle, one that perhaps lathered too deeply in his need to condescend her and belittle her, now that she had nothing but her broken ligaments. “funny you should say that. i hardly think being a failure should occupy that much of your time to forget to rid of my ring.” he felt tears swelling up at his eyes, from the humour that she was giving him. he hasn’t laughed in a good while, and he almost didn’t know how to live life after this.

     “you’re right though. there’s no need for us to talk anymore, but i’ll be here if you ever want to become a comedian, my stage at solace will welcome you with open arms. don’t ever do anything that you’re good at for free.” digits move to gently pat at his swelling tears, “being a failure, i mean.” 

The comment on sentimentality brought a grimace to Chaeyoung’s lips. He knew how to grind her gears, he knew how to get under her skin but of course, could she expect less from someone of his nature? Coming from the family that he came from? She supposed not. 

Calling her a failure really struck hard. Was he wrong? Of course not, and her hand itched to hit him, to make him pay for it, but she would be the only one to suffer in the end. When it came to him, she always was the one. Instead, she remained silent, staring. It was easy to go blank, to turn herself off and try to regain composure. It was hard to believe that they had once been so much closer than this. 

“To each their own,” she finally said, giving a shrug. It wasn’t really an answer to anything, but a part of Chaeyoung noted that he had won this round. He would know he did too, especially when she wasn’t denying it. “Small things amuse small minds I guess,” she said, the same expression on her face. A childish remark, really, but he was being childish too, exaggerated gestures to his own comment to make it seem much more funny than it actually was. “I won’t bother explaining my reasoning to you, even I know you don’t care that much, but fine, I’ll just take care of it some other way, if only to save yourself from dying of laughter.” 

“I’ll pass, but thanks,” she said. Of course, he didn’t actually mean what he said. He would never help her out, even if it was all just a joke. “I don’t think it’s your job to worry about what I do for free, so don’t you worry that pretty head of yours, Moon Taejoon. And as much fun as this has been, I’m just going to be on my way, and you should be on yours. I’m sure we won’t run into each other again.” 

[chaeyounghg]

hgchanmi‌:

@chaeyounghg​ !!

     at one point in time, chaeyoung and herself were set to do a collaboration in their works. chanmi had always awed at the other’s ability to do what she had done for years, labelling herself as a prodigy of her time. an era that froze and was shifted into something much more than what she had ever expected from anyone else, and that was why it came as a surprise to her when chaeyoung disappeared from the scene. her engagement with another familiar household name, and public enemy number one, moon taejoon was also brought into the light with the demise of her career. 

     chanmi was left still in awe, but this time at the fact that her friend chaeyoung had given up on the music career she had worked so hard to cultivate. 

     they were both so unfortunate to be faced with a man who appeared to be so caring and gentle, ignoring the rumours (at least on her end) about him. disregarding that he was the devil reincarnate, public enemy number one that played off as a charming prince so well but his unpredictability was what drew her in. her arranged engagement, both mutually agreeing to it a business partnership, and both to an extent, taking interest in the other’s movement throughout the ‘relationship’.

     but today, was different. today, she sat in front of chaeyoung, in her hand a cup of coffee, as the cafe window gave in what little sunlight was available on a gloomy afternoon as today. she was lucky enough to have ran into the other and with a shocked expression still looming over her features, she grabs for the other’s hand from across the table. “you really thought you could just run away from our collab without any consequences?”

At her highest point, there were lots of things planned for Chaeyoung to only lift her higher. To make her more grand, to make her more spectacular, to make her a household name that no one in this generation or the next would soon forget (an exaggeration, of course, but in Chaeyoung’s mind at that time, it was how it felt).

There were all types of performers, skilled craftsman in their trade, that Chaeyoung was supposed to play for, and play with. Geum Chanmi being one of thme. Chanmi, in Chaeyoung’s mind, was a household name. She was known for many things, both good and bad, but shining the most with her music. So when the opportunity came to do something together, it was an opportunity to take and strike while the iron was hot.

Of course, then came her demise and the end to everything, and all the collabs and performances came to an end. She couldn’t play while she was recovering and then, she simply couldn’t play.

When Chaeyoung saw Chanmi that day, sitting across each other at a cafe, warm beverages in hand, it felt awkward. At least, to Chaeyoung. Why? She didn’t know. She wasn’t oblivious to the fact that Chanmi had also been engaged to Taejoon, but she didn’t care. If anything, she worried for Chanmi, and hoped she wouldn’t end up like herself. 

The look of surprise on her face was hard to miss when she grabbed her hand and spoke, but she quickly recovered and offered an apologetic look. “Ah, well I’m sure you heard about what happened...” she said, holding up the free hand and wiggling her fingers. “It hasn’t been the same since then. Besides, you’re doing so much better now than ever before. You never really needed me.” 

[hgminjoon]

no destination, on my way.

[chaeyounghg]

hgminjoon‌:

monsters were plenty around these parts. it had dawned on him, at some point long ago, that being good didn’t get you fancy houses and shiny things. no matter how much his own family embraced the idea of hard work and righteousness. being a monster, or pretending to be one of them, was a requirement. so he nodded in agreement – in acceptance of the world they lived in. minjoon had been doing a lot of that lately. of caving in, of letting things just flow without so much as a word. how much could one person really do? 

he looked at her, momentarily defeated by the news. and it was obvious that there was nothing that he could do or say to make chaeyoung feel better. to make either of them feel better. truth be told he had never mastered the art of moving forward. without some external force minjoon would be stuck in that moment, still mourning the loss of his imaginary freedom. and he had always, never mind whether it was consciously or not, encouraged her to do the same. it happened every time he gave her pills. narcotics to numb the pain and neglect the real problem.

“details?” it was poison to hold out hope for any sort of freedom. it was false hope. they didn’t get to sort anything out. didn’t have to. “i’m sure they just want us to show up and smile.” for parties, for the wedding, for whatever came after. they were expected to just follow. and he couldn’t decide whether to fight or flight. not when for weeks their engagement had been nothing but talk – something they could joke about while thinking that their lives would never intertwine in this way.

“lee chaeyoung,” he faked surprise, glad to know that she was on the same page. even if it was the last place either of them wanted to be. “isn’t this all we can do?” minjoon offered her one before picking another for himself – he couldn’t deal with this without some help. “next life i’ll be a dolphin, anything but this, humans are too much work.” only one drag later and he was already talking nonsense. a few more and he’d probably be walking barefoot through the manicured backyard, worrying too much about things he couldn’t change – things he was too afraid to challenge. 

“i have a weird feeling about this.”

There wasn’t a lot to say. Or at least, not a lot that would help them. The room was filled with silence and occasionally, a look that one cast on the other. This look said a lot more than words. It screamed everything that they wanted to say out loud, but it was no use. The eyes really were the window to the soul. Even if they liked to pretend they could close the curtains and keep the rest of the world out, there was always a way to look in. 

A small part of her reminded her it could be worse...it could be a lot worse, the words constantly repeating themselves in her head and if she was honest, she hadn’t dated anyone in years. It wasn’t as though she had hope for true love, that she would have a happily ever after. She knew better than that. She knew the world she lived in. 

“Obviously,” she said. “But I can be....a bridezilla. If that helps,” the suggestion was empty in words, because she knew she couldn’t do that. But if push came to shove, and she had hopes for a last resort to get out of this, being a stubborn bride who wanted a wedding where she decided everything might be her best bet. It would definitely bring negative attention to her family, but she felt a little desperate and she blamed her parents for this. They should have let her make the decision, they shouldn’t have made it for her. A childish thought, but one that was true nonetheless.

Her name on his lips surprised her. Then, she saw the look on his face, and it lifted the mood a little. Lifted the weight she hadn’t realized so suddenly was placed on their shoulders. He was joking, it was obvious, but it was sad how true those words there. “It’s all we can do,” she sighed. “Just get completely fucked up and not go home...for me, anyway. They know I’m with you, maybe they’ll think Im’ spending the night and be against the idea,” she said, matching his tone to imply she was joking too, but it was always an idea. 

“Why? Because there will be drugs and stress mixed together? What could possibly go wrong? Lets throw alcohol into the mix and call it a night.”

[chaeyounghg]

ohjamiehg‌:

      the oh daughter simply nodded in reply with a small shrug , wondering how different things would’ve been if someone had written down her entire life , told her what to do… taken care of her —- maybe then she’d be able to proudly talk about her life , have something to show for &&. not just a shrug of her shoulders and a standard reply of one day at a time… “ i wonder it’d be like though… having your life all planned out.” she thought aloud , even though she didn’t entirely mean to.

     “ of course , and i really mean it. ” and she did , she’d say it endlessly if it meant that the other woman in front of her would finally see herself the way she did. although , her concern had always needed to be shown in more subtle way , timing meant everything but she would just hope that the younger was okay , even if she didn’t always tell her what was on her mind.

     jamie returned the hug with a pat on her back and smiled as they parted , nodding at her words “ well then , i’ll make sure it doesn’t go bad !! ” the grin was followed with a little wink before she chuckled. “ yah! —- of course , i’ve worn a dress… when i was younger and my new parents wanted to make their daughter look all pretty , sometimes mom still blackmails me into wearing one… but it’s not my first choice , or second. ” picking up a pair of ankle length combat boots , jamie held it up for the younger and raised an eyebrow. “ what do ya think ?? ”

Chaeyoung looked at the older girl, a brow raised at the question. She supposed some people craved a life planned out for them whereas other craved freedom, or at least, this was the case if you had the opposite way of living already. You were curious how it would be in their shoes, how your life would turn out differently. She would be lying if she said that she didn’t think about this too, sometimes. In fact, she thought about it a lot, especially after her accident. 

“Trust me, you’re not missing out,” she said with a wave of her hand. “But if you want to know, you can always ask someone to like...control a certain part of your life. Going to school? Organize your schedule to assignments and studying and all that. Want to work out? Get them to coach you. You know, that kind of thing,” she shrugged. 

Chaeyoung nodded, knowing that someone else making you wear it made you...not want to as much. “You just have to find your style of it now,” she said, knowing of a store nearby that might cater to her needs. At the boots, Chaeyoung examined them and took them from the other. “I think I like these too, I’ll see if they have my size,” she said, calling over one of the workers and sending them off to retrieve it for her. “But listen, there’s a store nearby, it’s totally more your style and they have dresses and skirts that I think you may like.” 

[chaeyounghg]

rekindle [chaeyoung&jisung]

[chaeyounghg]

hgjisung‌:

“no way.” his mouth followed the shape of an ‘o’, a usually clear sign that he was impressed and very much surprised. he tried to imagine the scenario, his old friend nearly stepping on a snake, maybe almost freaking out about the whole event. jisung wasn’t able to hold in his chuckle. “god, if i went through that i would probably not want a pet snake either. sugar is kind though, i promise. since i like you, she should like you too.”

chaeyoung was right about that, although he was sure the fact that he was so different and out of the norm for proper trainees was what initially drew attention to him. “right, right. if i put myself on a pedestal i wouldn’t be improving very well.”

he makes a pout, something he doesn’t do with others as much because of how afraid he was that it would simply look weird. “i’ll be waiting for your review. make sure you leave some sort of comment somewhere about it, signed by choi jisung’s number one fan.” 

with a smile, jisung returned the hug. he was confident that his subtle message got through to chaeyoung. “naturally. i doubt you can escape me again after this. but why would you want to, right?”

he hummed once more. “i don’t know if you’re a big fan of certain idols, otherwise i would have tried to give you a free ticket to the concert of an idol you like. if there is someone, i’ll try to get you a backstage pass. otherwise, you i’ll give you a pass for choi jisung’s concert instead.” 

Chaeyoung laughed at his reaction. She knew it was a ridiculous story, even if it was true. Fortunately not many experienced this, especially on the sidewalk next to a road near a down town area. “Well if you say so, then I very much look forward to meeting her,” she smiled, admiring the way he seemed to love his snake. “Whenever you have time, you let me know. My schedule is always clear, so we can work around yours.” 

“You can still be on a pedestal though,” she said. “Just remember there’s always higher you can go. Just up, up, up...and know that it never ends. And you’ll have more fans and more people will love you.” These words came easily because she knew that he would do well. Not many idols had a kind heart like him. Not many could still remain humble. 

Chaeyoung laughed and gave him a wink. “You got it. I’ll comment how great you are in ever episode, which won’t even be a lie because I already know you will be.”

“Exactly,” she laughed. “I’d be crazy if I did. We’ll even go to one of those...craft places and make friendship bracelets. You can’t go against that once it’s done. It’s like...breaking a law.”

“I will definitely take it to yours,” she said. “I’ll bring you food and get a front stage view of your show. As for other idols...you know, not anyone comes to mind. Trophy is cute, I do like them, and Nexus of course I have friends there, but I’d rather see you perform.”

[pandorasmelodies]

Visit Original Link

[koreantunes]

Visit Original Link

[hgminjoon]

no destination, on my way.

[chaeyounghg]

hgminjoon‌:

she was right – image was everything. it was currency. surely people didn’t flock to hwang geum simply because it was a nice place to be. they did so because it was the place to be. “there’s nothing wrong with being one of those people. have you ever met a real person in this place? i bet they’d get eaten alive.” it was about survival. sure, not of the life and death kind, but survival nonetheless. he could relate. 

“i won’t say a word.” he promised, no need to add fuel to the fire. but just how much could they really do. minjoon thrived on freedom – but he knew it was but an illusion. a very long leash that would one day dictate just how far away from the ideal son he could stray. it was something he’d learned to live with. at least that’s what he told himself.

minjoon nodded in agreement. they could do worse. he knew why his mother liked chaeyoung – even is she couldn’t see it. of course, it was superficial, she was stunning and had been born with talent. some things money couldn’t buy. but she was also part of their world, knew how to navigate through fake smiles and small talk, and yet there were cracks – there was a person behind the usual hwang geum-bred politeness. it was an image that suited his mother’s taste. even if she only knew the half of it. 

he watched her leave the room. too preoccupied with his call to wonder why. they had met – the grown-ups. as if they weren’t old enough to make their own decisions. but some things didn’t get questioned, that was simply the way it was. they had decided – it was a good match after all and they couldn’t let the kids drag this on any longer. it wasn’t up to them anyway. and he didn’t ask but his mother made sure to mention – the inheritance, it’s tied to this marriage – you know how contracts work right? after all its not his money, it’s family money. he felt…what, betrayed? how could his own mother threaten to take away a birthright? minjoon’s jaw clenched up, he had no particular thoughts – just feelings; anger and defeat. but what could he say? his mother had made it clear – it wasn’t about them. it was about some archaic idea of power and bloodlines. it was bullshit and they were just caught up in it. 

the phone call was brief. he had been summoned back home later that week and promptly let go. minjoon had stared at his phone for a few seconds before chucking it at one of the walls. drawing some satisfaction from watching it come apart. 

he was going to pick it up, salvage whatever was left, when chaeyoung came back into the room. minjoon just looked at her and sighed. yes – of course. and yeah it fucking sucks. hurts to know, this time for sure, that you’re just a pawn in a chess game nobody signed up for. “it’s only true if you say it out loud.” he smiled, the sort that didn’t quite reach the eyes, “i have just the thing.” minjoon went back to the drawer and pulled out a few vape pens, color-coded for who knows what. 

Chaeyoung could only respond to his comment with a snort. He wasn’t wrong. “I think the only time you see someone real is when you make them angry. You see the monster that they try to bury inside themselves,” she said. She had been fortunate not to be on the receiving end of any of this, but she had witnessed it plenty and heard about it from others. 

It took a moment for Chaeyoung’s anger to be set aside, just a little, in order to notice his phone on the floor, in pieces. He took the news well, it seemed. But that wasn’t what was important right now, that was not the detail to focus on, there was a bigger matter at hand. 

She wasn’t looking at Jeon Minjoon, her friend and her dealer, she was now looking at Jeon Minjoon, her fiancé. Her husband-to-be. Talking about how to put a stop to this before it all started suddenly became a lot more difficult. “Fuck,” she said, burying her face in her hands, as though this would somehow make everything better. “I should have known something was up with the way my mom was so excited that I said I was coming to see you...what do they think is going to happen knowing we’re together?” she shuddered at the thought. 

It’s only true if we say it out loud. Chaeyoung looked at him, unsure of how to respond. It was true, they could pretend and act like they hadn’t received the call, like nothing had happened, but it would only work if they weren’t who they were. “If they left things for us, then we could do that...but do you think they’re going to back off now? Let us....figure out.....details?” The words were vague, but she was sure he would understand what she meant.

There was no way their parents would leave it be. They would set the date. They would pick the location, they would pick the food...the most freedom they would have was picking what they would wear...only with the appropriate parties tagging along to add their input. Chaeyoung just wanted to scream.

When Minjoon spoke, there was hope that suddenly spurred. She couldn’t think of what he could possibly have to fix this situation, but if anyone would, it would be him. Then, he found what he had been looking for, and Chaeyoung realized he had found a temporary fix, not a permanent one. 

“Fuck it,” she sighed. “I’m in. I don’t think I want to go home right now so lets just get fucked and forget about all this.”