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[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

rebel fitgirl mom's hair possibilities + variants - variants coz really, there has got to be more than one way to wear your hair no matter the haircut yknow?

mix of braids, faux pompadours, shaved sides and undercuts 

quite possibly doing gradient shaves and fanciful tattoo undercuts. mhmm yeah.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

now that inktober's over, it's back to the old routine.

hair studies for two of the four (???) love interests for a project.

themes for both are vintage pin up (entj) and rebel fitgirl (isfp). i profiled them by mbti because since i was starting from scratch with both, i wanted them to have a 'grounded personality' of sort.

entj lady has victory rolls, beehives and pincurls going on. might consider bumper bangs.

isfp lady, on the other hand, will have shaved sides, undercuts and dyed gradient hair. so her hairstyles had to be somewhat stylish and dramatic while remaining fashionable.

gonna be doing the proper hair design sheets for these this week.

the third one under my charge... her style is way too simple so it didn't warrant a hairstudy. that and i think i may have to change her mbti profile again lololol.

the fourth is supposed to be handled by a diff writer but to this day i have yet to get her details??? orz

(idk if i should tag this with the tempo name i gave it because it’s lood lol)

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[016] harleth de aurelias from my imagination

now inked!

coz yknow, when your muse goes 'hey, hooman, draw me', you don't ask why, you just do it.

oreo and peonies coz why not.

besides, haven't assigned a shoujo manga flower/symbolic whatever to him yet. tbh idk how i actually did the peonies. i just bullshitted my way till it was done. LOL. that and it's 'close' to the yellow chrysanthemum anw. chinesey flowers of royalty? im considering matching him with someone whose image flower is chrysanthemum so.

first time inking something with blue pencil. didn't erase and thought id tinker with 'removing the traces' on GIMP itself. ...it's not exactly easy to do and somehow there are still some traces left. imma have to learn how to get the hang of that eventually.

...i messed up the right eye. i didn't realize till much later on. WALAO. managed to fix it post edit somehow. miracles happen...

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[wip] harleth de aurelias from my imagination

AGAIN! but with the blue pencil.

got bored working on the previous sketch of him that was an offshoot of a prior work. so this is an offshoot of an offshoot. that was a mouthful.

HOW DO U FLOWERS HAHAHA. iDunnoEither.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

i actually need to draw more ocs besides harleth.

IT'S BEEN HARLETH FOR DAYS.

or ryuuhi.

uwu

i have other ocs too. LOOOL.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[wip] harleth de aurelias from my imagination

first time derping with blue pencil. (not it's not cyan irl, i had to post edit to make the lines dark and black then the navy blue turned cyan)

since i messed up the inking + im sleepy + im forgetful, ill prolly finish this as a 'trial' then make a new copy to properly ink.

also this is a remind that:

'YOU KNOW YOU SUCK WHEN YOU FORGET YOUR OWN OC DETAILS'.

you DO NOT use phoenix motif on any other character BUT hokuto.

-accidentally ues on oreo (my nickname for him), has to quickly replace with another birb motif-

he's on a peacock feather cape motif now tho. but it prolly won't show coz only up to chest.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

mbti profiled my ocs.

no surprise that they're Ni/Ne and Ti/Te doms mostly. but my pet fave/s are the se-doms who either 'get shit done' or 'I AM A DIVAAA'.

idk how to write a fi-dom so i don't have too many of that.

fe-dom... he scares me the most to write. haha.

THE NI-DOMS ARE SO EASY TO WRITE. DEF THE TOP DOGS ON THE ROSTER. not sure if im trying too hard to make it that they're NOT exactly me coz they're not? aha. like i don't go 'that's me' with them but more of 'they're the easiest to write for coz we think the same way'.

the chara i actually tried to model after myself, to be a 'self insert' turned out to be my 'shadow function self' so to speak. so she didnt turn out so good. :v

BUT YES TI/TE DOMS ARE NICE. I CAN LET OUT MY INNER ASSHOLE FOR A GIVEN TIME AND THEN SLIP BACK TO BEING CUTE AND CUDDLY AGAIN WHEN IM DONE.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[wip] harleth de aurelias from my imagination

because baby wants bling.

baby gets bling. (who am i kidding, he always gets bling)

doing a 'study' off a previous piece i did of harleth. i realize not all of the jewelry i had drawn to begin with made sense. lmaaao. will probably redo to reflect the new jewelry designs.

stopping here for now.

this will be so much fun to ink 8D (swore i was working on inking the original piece but ended up 'needing' to decipher the workings of the original and then this happened' OH WELL)

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

i can't help but feel im losing it.

by it, i mean my motivation to keep doing what i do.

idk if it'll help but im trying my best to recall why im doing the things i do. i'm trying to remind myself why they made me happy in the first place.

aaa.

i suppose it would but then i also cant help but feel im trying too hard with this. hahaha.

not really doing anything right now really.

decided to properly mbti profile the crew of characters and write short descripts for most of them. im halfway down the list.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

was this close to uploading an inktober but the wrong was too glaring and my 'do the right thing' sense was too loud to ignore. coz yknow, one does simply do for the sake of doing. you do it so you can get it done right. no other way. nothing in between.

sure im trying to teach myself to chill and learn to make mistakes, actually make mistakes to learn and try new things but---I DON'T THINK THAT'S AN EXCUSE TO JUST MAKE MISTAKES PER SE, LET THEM SLIDE AND BE FINE WITH IT EVEN WHEN YOU'RE AWARE. THAT'S JUST.

no.

sure, make mistakes. realize you did then learn from it.

know you made one then let it slide and defend yourself in the face of having made a mistake? NO. DON'T. YOU KNOW YOU DID THAT ALREADY. NOW FIX IT.

aaaa.

must fix or it feels wrong.

I CAN'T DO 'WRONG'. AAAAAAAAAA.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

and speaking of catching feels, i have too many lol.

so much that i can feel a burn out. or am already burning out.

someone save me lol.

artsing gives me life but the socializing, more like, the socializing with the wrong people and how it ties in with the necessity of artsing is killing my drive. after all these years, i never realized that my burn outs were not caused by the lack of enthusiasm for artsing but for the fact i had to conform and supress myself to uphold and honor the consensus and preferences of the group or other people i'm in. and i have the knack of always walking into these awful social traps. i like traps but gdi, this isn't the kind that's tasty at all. uwu

it worries me im turning towards my muses again because that's like 'you've really hit lowest of the low at this rate'

this is pretty much why i quit rp alr. i couldn't find someone i could truly be myself without compromising something. yeah, yeah i get that everyone's got that 'i can't be me crisis'. i'm one of those i suppose. but unlike rping, i can't live without artsing loool. rp i can live without because it's like an option to co-write with someone else anyway. but artsing on your own, in your private little space? FUCKING NEED!

sigh.

i wanna think this is a rut but idk.

i'm really scared that this is a true blue burn out.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

since i have nowhere else to go but here, ill just vent here. it didn't feel right to speak up on facebook and twitter for some reason. i hope the day that i'll ever feel the need to censor and feel any less will never come. i already feel bad enough as it is to vent anywhere, messenger or blogwise. i really dislike catching feelings. they're too overwhelming to hold and carry. bottling them up isn't a good idea for long either. sometimes being numb was easier lol.

anw.

i feel so offended whenever people call line art sketches. like, no. that's not a sketch. do you eve know what a sketch is? wtf.

or how they imply that unless you color your work, it's unfinished.

i know i draw for my own enjoyment first and foremost but when people give me these kind of comments, i just---i don't know. i really don't know. i'd like to think that they don't mean anything bad. but it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth after.

altho i can see art in color and appreciate stuff in color, i just don't understand coloring. at all. i'd like to learn but then that's just me wanting to conform and fit it, not something i entirely want to do and learn. but then coz it's an 'evolve or die' thing out there even if you don't draw professionally, at some point, you're still gonna have to push yourself towards learning how to color anyway.

it's...

bothersome.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[015] saint from my imagination

i have these 'special characters' that i call muses. they're special in the sense that they were created to specifically embody a literary and/or visual aesthetic and/or were born out of a time of creative drought.

saint was born during a time of experimental RP that had gone downhill really fast (as predicted) and for me to last for as long as i had, i literally fed off his presence and the inspiration he brought. in exchange for his services, i had to write a story where he was the lead character and got a happy ending. as one of those characters that existed in abstraction for awhile, im pretty pleased with how he turned out. he certainly embodies my fondness for downturned and/or hooded eyes as you can see. OAH.

for those who have been my ge blog, i may have mentioned at least once that i have a OC who reminds me of levin, hence my fondness for levin

TAHDAH.

PS: I feel filthy for putting my signature where it is. LOOOL.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[014] vulpecula (non-canon form) from my imagination

one of my oldest characters. was only salvaged from abstraction only recently and surprisingly came out pretty well. i think it started with him that i wanted to render all my ocs properly and onto paper at long last.

where do i begin with this guy...

originally created as a match for my then long term RP partner. of the original cast we started off, him and her OC were the only ones that truly stayed throughout.

he has the personality of a lovable but impulsive idiot. he's sparked off by possibility and excitement and thinks on hit feet. his idea of a good time is going off on adventures and deathdefying stuff so he can look back and go 'That was fun right? Haha. I nearly died tho.' but don't let that goofy and smooth talking exterior fool you however, vulpecula is surprisingly smart and intuitive. so much people get surprised when he's the one who can come up with the most feasible of ideas in a matter of moments. sadly, that acumen and wit ALWAYS gets overshadowed by his easily bored and thrill seeking dominant traits.

something thats bothered me since was altho he seemed like a good match to anyone i ever paired him with in RPs, he didn't seem to 'fit' with anyone but then something was always off. i would only realize MUCH later on that he was not a romantic/sexual being. sure he could jump in bed and it'll get really dark and kinky fast but truth was? he only saw it as a 'have to do'.

...he confessed he was actually aromantic and he never truly enjoyed or saw the point of sex. that and the only people that really made his black heart skip a beat was his sons and his best friend, then watching them grow, prosper and be happy. his best friend however is already paired off so nah. oddly enough, i once suggested to both of them to get together romantically in an AU and they both made disgusted expressions at the idea of even touching each other.

we now have an agreement that i am not to put him in any timeline of sort where he has to be with anyone. ever. apparently, he wants to wander and explore the world more than get sexy with anyone. he's already satisfied with past attempts of coupling.

wow the crooked smile really suits him. always wanted to draw a chara with a crooked smile. me gusta.

NOTE: canon form vulpecula is a werewolf kemonimimi. he is depicted as a fox here however for a timeline where he's supposed to be an enshrined fox god and clan head in a certain region.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[13] ryuuhi from my imagination

an accidental inktober.

i was inspired to finally draw him in whatever way or form recently and spontaneously chose to depict him in his semi casual in a fantasy scenario.

that and i had answered an original character questionnaire for him and it would be derp not to include art of him. had to work on something fast. LOL. so this is pretty much a doodle. didn't give a hoot about anatomy or what not. i just wanted to make something. period.

i had gotten sick again somewhere in the mid of the month and had to take a rest. and then my lightbox had a strike. OOOKAY. i did the retrace on tracing paper. my hands dont feel steady enuf to ink and im seeing so much jitter. haha whatever. D:

so much dirt on this one... i did the inking on a repurposed piece of tracing paper. there had been stuff on it and i just erased. it totally showed in the scan. i had to clean it up bit.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[wip] ryuuhi from my imagination

of all my main cast ocs, he is the one who eluded me for years. as such he remained in abstraction for so long. not just in image but in writing and focus. ;; im gonna make it up to you and write/draw more about you i swear.

im... trying to get the hang of his hair. it's easier said than done. clearly a 90s inspired OC design (hahaha mullets ftw). tbh, he's based off kurama (both forms) from yyh in image alone but with a different personality. i had always seen kurama as a 'manly' chara somehow so i was always distraught whenever i saw fan art that would sissify him. u,u so im like ugh. /makes a masculine but bishounen version still to comfort self

his personality? cinnamon roll. seriously. an absolute cinnamon roll. he's so... nice. he's like professional husband/lover/bff/bro/etc incarnate. but because he's tol, so very tol and beeg. no one ever suspects or realizes what a cutie he is. u,u of all his brothers, id have to say he's the one ive overlooked the most. SO OVERLOOKED HE HARDLY HAS HIS OWN STORYLINE OF HIS OWN UNLESS IT OVERLAPS WITH HIS BROTHERS. he doesn't even have a lover either. im still trying to work out a possible in bred pair up for him but ugh. UUUGH.

im not final on the hair yet. as well as his eyes. still debating if ill keep the tarime eyes.

[charlemagne-rosenqueen]

[inktober] 012 our stars from my imagination

definitely one of those 'im bored and the driver isn't here yet so ill just doodle' sketches.

im pretty sure this is voltaire, one of my ocs. but then braids aren't his thing. he always had his hair up in a high ponytail instead. (then who is this...?)

well not entirely however.

since i remember that the ink on the neck was inspired by me actually seeing someone with the same design (sort of?) on their neck while lining up at a government office for something. was it my exam application? maybe...

i vaguely remember wanting to finish this so i could use it as coloring practice. timely as it is, i feel the same way now and decided to finally finish this now since in the next few months, i do plan to do some coloring practice indeed.

hurr hurr.

altho now i've redrawn this, i kind of wanna go further than a simple outline and do some more crazy lines. but for now, initial inked sketch first :D