Should I Start Praying? (Sort of a love letter for him)
The inevitable has now started to make its presence felt..and sooner or later, I know I had to face it. But the real question is that, should I start praying for it? Or just let it happen? The desire for a soul to share my life with seems fiery these days.. And I just donāt know.. If I should be entertaining these kinds of thoughts. First is because Iāve got a handful of things in my plate at the moment, secondly, I might be still too young to be bothered by these kind of thoughts and third, to be frank, I donāt feel ready yet. Matter of fact, I donāt think Iām near being readyā¦ Wow, just wow. I dunno if I can handle all the roller-coaster emotional side effect of it. Haha. But what to do, Iām feeling it.. I guess IāM STARTING TO PRAY FOR A GUY THAT IāVE NEVER MET BEFORE, or maybe weāve met, Iām not sure. Haha. Is it possible to love a person without even knowing him? To care for him deeply without knowing his name? To even respect that person with sincerity? Shocks. This is unusualā¦ At least for me. š But it kinda feels right.
Iām in the least state of being in love or being romantically involve wd anyone right nowā¦ And the thing is that, from then up to this very moment, I canāt imagine seeing anyone I know romantically. Hahahahaha. This is weird. And yet, I get this feeling of loving someone Iāve no idea what his identity is likeā¦donāt get me wrong .. Iām not in search for āMr. Rightāā¦Iām not looking for him, Iām not even trying to imagine what will he be like. If heās tall or not, my type or not (i donāt even know my type haha), serious or jolly, and so on. Iām just loving him with the love of the Lord. Crazy huh? So how do I love him without even knowing him? I get it, he wont be perfect, yes he definitely wonāt be. Hahaha. I thank God for that. Haha. At least I know we have something in common. š we both are flawed individuals. And being flawed, weāll be reassured by the truth that we have a perfect God who is able to sustain whatever set backs we have. š
Soā¦ How do I love an anonymous person? Well, Iām not sure.. The Lord put so much love in my heart that I know I have to love him this muchā¦I love him so much so that Iām preserving every emotions to pursue God first in everything, to surrender him first to God and vow not to run after anyone. š I love him so much that Iām taking good care of myself so that Iāll be āin good conditionā when the time arrives that Iāll be put into his care. ā¤ļø I love him so much that Iām giving him time and space to grow in the Lord. I care for him so much that Iām praying for him to overcome every challenge and difficulties along his wayā¦ that he will be encouraged and inspired by the Lord. Iām praying for him to continually be patientā¦ Iām praying that wherever he is, he will be happy and satisfiedā¦ Iām praying that whatever personal goal he has for himself, he will achieved it..all for the Glory of God. Iām praying that he will be able to move on from every heart break and will always find light in times of darknessā¦Iām praying that before we finally meet, weāve both found our identity in Christ and that it wont be us fulfilling each other flaws (for that is the work of the Spirit) but rather our individual passion will be complementing in such a way that the work of the Lord will be complete through it.
Again, just to make things clear, Iām not praying for God to give me a knight in shining armor Mr. Right. I know, I donāt need someone like that, because I already do have my knight in shining armor, and I only need oneā Jesus is my only knight in shining armor. š He alone deserves that title. What Iām praying for is that the time we are apart will be used to mature both of us and enlarge our hearts, that it will be full of the love of God So much so that we will reach out to the hearts of Godās people and as we reach out to their hearts, at Godās appointed time, we also would be able to reach and grasp each others hearts- his love for God to capture my heart, my love for God to hold his heart. That our love for the Lord would unite us both.
Iām not dreaming. Iām not expecting. Iām not there yet, my love for God and His people is being tested everyday.. And Iām sure that he is as well..
So yeah. As early as now.. Iām praying. Not for any particular personā¦Just praying for my Mr. Unknown to pursue God and for us to be led to each other at the proper time. š
āLove, Jemai ā¤ļø
#Faith #Hope #Love
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