No Care [chapter 2] - (18+! aang x reader)
cw: reader is sad and lonely, aang is..a partner. half proofread iāve read it too many times rewriting it. no spoilers for the movie rlly
authors note: hiii! so sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out, i watched the movie and then seriously contemplated this entire story but ive decided to kinda just intertwine the two, so i changed chapter one a bit to more follow the story ive got planned out >:). i listened to all i wanted and not enough by daughter on repeat while writing and rewriting it, while trying to make it long to make up for time, so i hope you all enjoy!!!
as the morning creeped in through the cracks of the curtains hanging over the windows in your apartment, you could see the pinks and oranges overtaking of the hues of the dark blues. it was like how every morning started. it seemed heād wake up automatically with a ray of pure innocence to push away every lingering thought the night gave.
āgood morning,ā heād whisper into your shoulder, just in case you were still asleep. he followed it with a gentle kiss as his arms flexed just slightly when he squeezed you. a content sigh exhaled through his nose, unable to bite back the smile on his lips. but his eyes were still closed, and youād wondered if he was dreaming of her.
youād feigned sleeping, simply letting your eyelids rest as you would going to sleep. you felt horrible, guilty, for feeling such negative emotions when this is how you woke up every morning.
whether he knew you were faking or not, the avatar sneakily slipped out of the bed. you could hear him shuffling to dress himself in the robe discarded on the floor from the night before. the soft thumping of the air nomad bead landing on his chest was the last thing you hear before he walked out of your shared room to begin his avatar duties. this left you alone with your thoughts again.
as the morning grew brighter, the sight of both of your clothes from the previous night thrown to the floor with such rush they were strewn all over the area. this showed he loved you enough to want you..but it was all you had. and as days progressed, you could feel the weight of it beginning to not be enough.
night love and fading days had only blurred together to get to this moment. you pushed yourself up from your position, letting your feet hang from the bed, just above the cold tiling from the floor. when you finally stood up, the cold that use to cause you such discomfort was grounding, a subtle realization of the current state of your life.
you sat there, eyes glazed and staring off just like you had done only hours prior. everything moved like you were half awake, the sight of each object as you moved had the subtle blurred fuzzed trail as you scanned over each decoration. everything picked out by you, him, or a combination. it almost felt fake, like you were only playing pretend.
you had only gotten up to use the bathroom, to splash water in your face and relieve yourself from any stress the night gave. you still had a few more hours before you had to begin your day, so you decided to try and get some sleep. you wrapped yourself in items that only brought comfort, the type of comfort only brought to fill the impending void of loneliness that swallowed someone whole.
as you got settled back into bed, your eyes finally felt heavy enough to drift close on their own. the only thing swarming in your mind was the fact you needed advice from someone, or at least just an ear to listen to the troubles you knew you couldnāt converse with the avatar.
you and sokka had always gotten along, you truly had felt like he was the older sibling you never had the chance of experiencing. he listened, he gave advice..but it just usually never helped, or only made things worse..it was the thought of him wanting to help that counted. not to mention, how could you talk about how his sister was a reason of her ache? not the full thing, and not her fault, but it was still intertwined.
you and toph had a nice relationship together, you reading out things to her when needed so she wouldnāt feel left out. when sheād come to your tent late at night, it was usually to steal whatever snacks you had tucked away, or just to listen to you read whatever book it was you had your interest in, just enough for her to become bored to the point of sleep. her sarcastic remarks wouldnāt help during this situation.
katara was out of the question. not only did she also move back to her village with sokka, but you already felt some type of way when the thought of meeting back up with everyone came from aang. there was no need to dig a knife deeper in a cut so different, yet the same.
so in retrospect, all that was left was zuko. a boy born into hate, fueled by hate, but changed with love and kindness. he knew of silent struggles, he knew of loud struggles. he knew the pain of loneliness versus isolation, you knew at the end of it all, he too just wanted someone to listen. not to mention, he knew the avatar better than anyone. they used to frequently referred to one another as best friends, at least in childhood.
maybe thatās why you both had so many hushed conversations for just your ears. maybe thatās why he listened to every detail of your background, only commenting at the end to share troubles of his own. it was reassuring to see how he had rebuilt himself, a silent note of how everyoneās destiny was in their own hands. it was exactly why you decided to reach out to him once youād woken up from your small nap.
your eyes drifted open after a soft gush of air was pushed right into your sleeping face, sleepy murmurs and complaints mumbling out of your mouth as you tried to recompose yourself.
a pair of bright silver eyes, glimmering with childlike wonder peered happily into your own. a large smile plastered across his lips as he rested his chin against one of his hands while he kneeled in front of your spot on the bed. āare you awake this time?ā
the butterflies that erupted in your stomach couldāve easily made one queasy, the pure sweetness in his voice could give anyone a massive sugar rush followed by a cavity.
āyes,ā your voice was hoarse with sleep. āiām awake this time,ā you ended with a yawn, pulling the small blanket around you up to cover your mouth as you did so.
the avatar leaned in, pressing your foreheads together as his nose gently rubbed against yours. there was something so innocent in the action, undoubtedly making your heart swell with emotions once more.
āi have to leave for a little today, iām taking appa to a neighboring town to help with a few buildings. it shouldnāt be too long, okay?ā he hummed, wrapping his arms around you once you sat yourself up. it was a gentle hug, but firm enough to stand as a reminder that he would always come back. and you werenāt sure whether or not thatād end up being a good thing.
after aangās departure and your silent reminiscing, you finally made your way back to the study down the hall where you fetched a simple quill with ink, accompanied by a sheet of paper. your hand was still, fingers slightly shaking the quill as you fought with yourself on what questions to ask, whether or not you should even be asking questions.
what do you say after, what, seven years of no contact? āhey zuko! itās me your old buddy, so aang and i are together and i feel like im just a replacement for katara. but itās whatevs! talk to you soon!ā like, no. you sound like a schoolgirl going through a minuscule heartbreak asking their parent for advice, knowing what the answer will be.
you groaned, running a hand over your face as you took a deep breath. aang had taught and enforced so many breathing techniques on you during your time together that it was second nature at this point. you could feel all your thoughts collecting in a single filed line, the tension from your shoulders releasing the moment you began to write.
your letter was simple. ādear zukoā, is started. you didnāt know how to properly approach a conversation so you asked questions, some simple, others a lot tougher. all related to his life, how he had been, etc. the last few questions were what really stood out.
āif you felt a void, a vortex in your chest and you knew your partner reciprocated it, what would you do? what can you do?ā
ādid the feeling of never being enough ever go away for you after all this time?ā
it was already mid afternoon by the time you finally left the house after putting yourself together, all you had to do was drop the letter off with the messenger and be on your way. perhaps you could stop by the market and grab some fresh ingredients? but then again, you had all of those frozen vegetables and fruits you harvested during your time wondering.
you were quickly snapped out of your thoughts by a laugh that sounded just like a young katara, but the pitch was higher. it was enough to send a shock through your body, eyes rushing up to see a small group of children walking around the town. three girls, three boys. one of the girls, the one who sounded like a higher pitched katara, let out a bright laugh at something one of the other boys had said, her arms wrapped tightly around his arm.
young puppy love was always a sight to see, but seeing your younger self and your friends in their younger form in these kids left a sour taste in your mouth. it was taunting in a way. a subtle reminder that what katara and aang had was real, was pure and nothing short of soul bound. thatās what you told yourself at least.
you took the back way home, your walk becoming abnormally quiet opposed to the loud lives on the main streets. the soft breeze whispered to the leaves of the trees, the leaves responding by letting a leaf fall from every other branch. it was quite scenic.
your mind soon wandered to the times aang had brought you here. your hands tightly enclosed in one anotherās, you both sharing the same bright smile as you ran to keep up with his much longer legs as the harsh rain poured down onto the city. the way he scooped you up and twirled you in the heart of the storm, placing a wet kiss right to your lips. it was one youād happily accept, returning with just as much love.
as happy as the memory was, this was the beginning of your suspicions on how much he truly loved you. later that evening, he kept misspeaking and calling you katara, or referencing something only she would know. he apologized, of course, giving your knuckles a soft kiss before dismissing himself out of your apartment as a whole.
you tried to be understanding, he just really missed her! but you both had been together for almost a year at this point. maybe slipping up every now and again would be more believable, but every time? the feeling gnawed an open wound that only got bigger over time.
being sad and mopey ruined everything after so long. you hated feeling like this. so small to the point you couldāve been convinced you were simply a conscious figment of someoneās ( aangs? ) imagination. . as much as you wanted to talk to your boyfriend about this, you knew itād end up in either an argument or someone shutting down. why was this so frustrating? why was this so hard? how can aang save the world, bring peace to the nations, but not properly express how he feels?
he was never the best at talking about how he felt, the avatar was the biggest peoples person of them all. that was probably the biggest reason why everything only ended in arguments. you understood being a peoples person ā a people pleaser would seem to be a better fitting word, but thatās why it irritated you so bad when he refused to talk. out of all people, it felt like at least you would, at least somewhat, be able to relate to those pleasing issues.
you stopped walking, simply turning on your heel to take a real look at the city being built from the help of all of their friends in each of their nations. you recounted the moment the building of the city began, every victory before then, every soft moment where you all just existed in the presence of another.
the remainder of your day was spent wandering around the newly constructed pathways, aweing at how much work had been in such short time. only when the street lamps began to flicker on did you decide it was time to venture back to your home.
much to your genuine surprise, aang was already home and sat on the couch while he fiddled with something in his hands. it created a soft thudding noise, multiple pieces clanking together as he furrowed his brow in further concentration.
you silently closed the door, knowing more than better to startle not just an air bender, but a master of all four elements. you drew closer, dropping your bag to the counter with a loud āthudā to make your presence known.
aang whipped his head around, gray eyes wide with a sudden shock that you were sure was sent to his spine. you giggled out a gentle apology.
āwhat do you have?ā you hummed, crossing your arms over the back of the couch and looming over the others shoulder. it was a bunch of wooden logs held together by string placed strategically, looping through some of the holes that punctured through both sides.
āitās an ancient wind charm i found! it looks really close to one of the ones i had in my room. thereās a temple a lot closer here than i had thought, so i stopped by after my business at that village by the mountain foot. iām honestly surprised i was able to get home as early as i did,ā he hummed as he explained his finding. he spoke like how a child did about his favorite toy. āi guess luck played out in your favor, hm?ā was all you could reply as you continued to watch him reconstruct the fragile object to a usable form.
he let out a breathy laugh, a smile pulling at his lips just enough to show the tips of his white teeth and crease the outer corners of his eyes. from any angle, you swore you could still see the twelve year old version of him you had met.
your hand reached out, cupping the underside of his chin with a soft touch and turned his head towards you. your eyes had softened, the smile on your face only growing. the apples of your cheeks warmed with a gentle red warmth, that same warmth coursing throughout your body. you would love aang in any life, in any form, if only he had the freedom of continuing a life with you in death.
you pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, then down to in between his eyebrows. gray eyes watched you with a loving curiosity as you dropped your head to place kisses to either sides of his face. it was a simple gesture, but you knew it was enough for the moment.
that was until aang pulled his face away, too fast for someone wanting touch from a loved one. the action alone pulled at your heart strings, the feeling was enough to create a genuine ache in your heart. his attention was filled with something else, but you knew it was a someone rather than a something. the fiddling with a wind chime was a distraction, it all was a distraction.
chap. 1 , chap 2. (current) , chap 3 (tba) , chap 4 (tba)
