It is rare indeed that people give. Most people guard and keep; they suppose that it is they themselves and what they identify with themselves that they are guarding and keeping, whereas what they are actually guarding and keeping is their system of reality and what they assume themselves to be. One can give nothing whatever without giving oneself ― that is to say, risking oneself. If one cannot risk oneself, then one is simply incapable of giving.
feeling so anxious this week. it’s gotten really bad and as usual it’s the time i should be reaching out the most and am holding back instead. it should be so obvious when i’m putting this much effort in to communicating with others about themselves, or cocooning up in my apt. it’s not just the job search and visa/logistics stress. it’s all the introspection and pursuing something that can’t be met or returned. it’s dissolving into anxiety for news of every govt failing to take care of the pandemic. it’s not feeling like the three or four closest to me are actually there - they are instead absorbed into someone else’s world, or would only be available for once-in-a-while-catch-ups, not the friendships and relationships i need. but why put that pressure out there just for them to feel stressed. the question is to make myself need less, and i’m not doing it very well.
If they carved this saint out of limestone then it's really dumb to leave it out to be weathered by SEA AIR lmao it's deffos gonna dissolve and form these alveoli-like holes
theartofmadeline
titsay
baratheonpilled
gummygunk
origamiaround
amandla
