Folie a Deux era when Pete's having a horrible fit of anxiety and Andy has to calm his boyfriend down???
Pete’s huddled back in his bunk alone, gripping his pillow so hard that his knuckles are turning white. He knows Andy has told him time and time and time again to tell him when Pete’s having anxiety, but he just can’t bring himself to bother Andy with that. His boyfriend has better things to do than deal with another one of his stupid fucking anxiety attacks. Why does Andy even stay with him? He’s no where near as loving and patient and kind as Andy is.
It feels like the walls are closing in as all the thoughts swirl violently around in Pete’s head. The walls of the bunk start to close in as Pete’s heartbeat speeds up even more, thumping hard against his ribs. His breaths become more and more shallow and rapid as tears begin to prick at his eyes. The world feels hazy and unreal and Pete just wants it all to stop.
“Pete? You back here?” He hears a soft voice call from out in the hall. Pete goes tense, hiding his face under the pillow and those familiar, tattooed hands pull back the curtain to the bunk. The hall light shines in on him, and even though he can’t see Andy, Pete can sure as hell feel his heavy and undoubtedly disappointed gaze resting on him. He curls up even further into a ball, trying to just blink out of existence.
“Oh my God, Pete, baby, what’s wrong?” Pete feels the mattress dip as Andy climbs into the bunk. He feels a gentle but firm hand tug at the pillow over his face. Slowly, as if trying not to spook him, Andy pulls the pillow away, exposing Pete’s tear streaked face. “You know you can tell me anything. What’s wrong, baby?”
Pete feels his throat locking up as he tries to force the words out. All that spills from his mouth is a jumble of words, trying to show Andy how he’s too good for Pete, trying to show Andy that he should run while he still can, trying to show Andy that he’s fucking worthless.
Andy just listens and takes it all in. As Pete lets out his anxiety fueled ramble, Andy gently repositions his boyfriend so that Pete’s head is resting against his chest, their two bodies entertwined in the bunk. Andy still has enough sense to pull the bunk curtain shut, not wanting Joe and Patrick to stumble in upon this personal moment. Andy then focuses all his attention back on Pete, whose words have slowed, but the anxiety attack hasn’t. His breaths are still fast and shallow, his body pratically shaking in Andy’s grip.
When it seems the words have stopped, Andy seizes the moment and goes into damage control mode. He shushes his boyfriend as he begins to cry again, gently petting Pete’s hair and cooing soothing noises at him. After a few minutes, most of the shaking has stopped and Pete’s breaths have slowed a bit.
“Why didn’t you come get me when you felt an attack coming on?” Andy asks quietly, placing a reassuring hand on Pete’s back and rubbing softly.
“Didn’t want to bother you with my stupid anxiety.” Pete mumbles into his chest. He finally lifts his head and meets Andy’s eyes.
“Nothing you do could ever bother me.” Andy says as we wipes a bit of smeared makeup off of Pete’s face. Blessedly, Pete cracks a small smile.
“Even when I’m doing stupid shit with Dirty?”
“Alright, that might bother me a little bit,” Andy concedes, “but that’s only because you’re gonna really hurt yourself one of these times.”
Pete presses his face back into Andy’s chest, wrapping his arms tight around his boyfriend’s torso. He literally couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend.
“So next time, please come get me when you feel an attack coming?” Andy asks after a couple quiet minutes of cuddling. Pete nods against his chest.
“Good. I love you, Panda.”
