I hate those “I promise I won’t leave you” moments. I remember when I promised I wouldn’t leave you. You promised you wouldn’t leave me. But now look at us, we both left each other. We broke our promise, together. I’m not sure what hurts the most. Is it me breaking my promise? Was it you breaking yours? Was it the fact you never stopped me when I left? I just don’t know. I do know that if you were different, then maybe, just maybe we could had been together forever. Not now my love. You pushed me away. So far that I could no longer hold on to you. It hurt to hold on but it also hurt to let go. I really wish I didn’t leave you. Of course I still love you. Actually, I also hate you. I hate how I still fucking love you after all you did to me. I gave you everything. I would have done fucking anything for you. How could you have been so stupid to not realise that? I’m telling you now, you will never, I mean never find anyone who would put up with your shit for as long as I did. I must have been insane. But now look at me. Just look at what you’ve done to me. You have fucking broke me. You’ve fucking hurt me so much. You forced me to leave you. Why did you do that you piece of shit I would have been there for you. Through thick and thin. And now, now I’m drowning in words I’ve never used. I’m swimming through thoughts no one has ever made me feel. Look at me, I can’t even function. Oh god, please just please stop this. I want you out of my head. I love you but I hate you, you fuck.
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