jaz

this is where I post my loser gay stuff, my Instagram is where the Kpop fan stuff is. they/them , autistic, genderfluid

[churrotentacles]

GET THE NORMIES OUT OF FANDOM SPACES 🔪🔪🔪

[churrotentacles]

NSFW warning for people who know me irl (it's not my fault if you continue to read)

IF YOU ARE GOING TO JUDGE ME AFTER READING PLEASE CHOKE :)

Hearing people talk about what they want in a relationship makes me realize how much of a fucking deviant I am. They talk about being taken care of but there is no deeper part of it, they just want people to hold doors open for them. And I sit there thinking about how much of a sub I am and how much more I want. My subbing is also nonsexual a real good chunk of the time but it is NEVER perceived that way by others and it hurts my soul.

Or people talk about how they find deep voices hot or something conventional like muscles and i sit over there quietly with my Pinterest board of bruises and blood reading my hardcore ao3 porn.

I feel like a fucking secret agent because they all think I'm a dom and want to inflict it on people but little do they know.

Everyone sees my story and thinks I'm just thirsting a normal(ish) amount but I quite literally see some posts and think he would look hotter with a dick in his mouth. It's not jokes for me I am so fucked in the head and everyone around me thinks I'm just exaggerating but I'm trying actively to tone it down.

The thoughts I have about age gap relationships (LEGAL ONES) and abusive relationships would genuinely draw so many concerns for people and they think I'm insane

This is definitely due to how young I was reading smut. I started at like age 12 and I know it's fucked my brain bad.

"my darkest tag is dacryphilla" I fear that's in my everyday tags and not even remotely freaky in my brain. People are so vanilla and it makes me feel like a succubus.

I love how much of a freak I am and I wouldn't change it for anything but when I think of having to speak to a potential partner about it I want to hurl and die.

[churrotentacles]

LETS FUCKING GO YALL

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was the hatty REALLY necessary

[churrotentacles]

MARNERS GOING TO WIN THE FUCKING CON SMYTHE I CANT DO THIS SHIT

[churrotentacles]

Grade 11s I see you and I understand your anger and sadness.

[churrotentacles]

Pride month is always hard for me because I have such a complicated relationship with my sexuality and identity. I'm not that proud of it because it changes so much and I never know what to call myself because unlabeled is a label in itself and how I feel changes all the time. Polyamorous is the only term I feel sure of and that one isn't very accepted by the community anyways. I don't have much experience with guys or girls and I'm constantly wondering if I'm lying to myself. Everyone seems so happy now that it's pride month but It just reminds me that I have no idea what I'm doing. It almost makes me sad because I feel like I don't actually like girls sometimes even though the thought of never dating one devastates me and I have had crushes on them before and with guys it's hard because I hate them so fast but I crave the type of attention I get from them. And as someone who is not cisgender it's even worse because that changes all the time and I never know what to tell people because I don't get dysphoria ever. At this time of year It just sucks to be so confident in everything else but then feel like such an alien when I'm supposed to feel the most included.

[churrotentacles]

FIRST RUN WAS 7:08 YALL IM JAZZED

[djarinvettel]

find someone as loyal as nico hulkenberg is to p11

[churrotentacles]

Sometimes I forget that sonamy is really popular and go to ao3 and am shocked

Like It's cute in the show but I forget that it's like an OTP for people

[churrotentacles]

Ascend - ZEROBASEONE

Intro - 10/10

- doesn't really count b/c it's an intro but It bangs

Top 5 - 9/10

- their voices are perfect

V for Vision - 10/10

- second prechorus is great

- Adlibs are wonderful

Customize - 10/10

- 5sos kind of sound

- their voices are extra Korean in this one

- I love it

Exotic - 8/10

- the rap is excellent

- really fun club song

Changes - 8/10

- close enough welcome back DJJ

Zero to hundred - 9/10

- I love

- kinda futurey hoverboard sound

- HIGH NOTE ATEEEE

They proved they could do a good job with half the group missing and they killed it. Very excited for them

[churrotentacles]

WYLD - 10/10

- HES SO HOT

- OMG ITS JUST LIKE TAEMIN I LOVE IT

- SOOOOO NEO

I'm a dancing cactus - 8/10

- housey I really like it

Skiii- 10/10

- OMGGGG ITS SO GOOD

- SO HYPE

- SO NEO YES IT IS TAEYONG

- MILITARY MUSCLES

Mermaid - 8/10

- it's just ok

Hot - 8/10

- that's my king of neo right there

- so him

404 euphoria - 10/10

- I love it actually

- I really like his vocals

Run - 9/10

- it sounded kind of like a JYP bside

Hypnotic - 7/10

- Jaemin would suit this better

Feeling myself - 8/10

- verses bang

- but nothing special

King of neo is back and he did not let us down

[churrotentacles]

I'm genuinely in love with sonic in sonic boom

[churrotentacles]

Me when I go AWOL and then come back asking people to go to the club

[churrotentacles]

Im playing otome games now 🙃

[churrotentacles]

Rodrina is THE ship

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I am having visceral reactions to Maki winking at the ASEA's