why gatekeeping the LGBT community is a necessary evil:
say that you decide to start a club it's an art club. you like this club, because it's full of artists just like you, who understand the struggles you go through. they have resources and advice and empathy to share, as do you, because you're all artists. but then one day, your friend who is not an artist, asks if they can join.
and they're your friend!! you want them to have fun too! maybe they have an appreciation of drawing, so you think it’s okay. so even though your friend doesn’t draw, you say sure! and they join the club. and they sit with everyone else and chat and talk, and everything’s good, it’s nice, it’s fun.
but then your other friend hears about your first friend being allowed in. and you already said yes to the first friend—how can you tell this one no? so you let this friend in, too. but then that friend decides that they really like the club, even though they don’t necessarily like drawing, so they invite THEIR friends. and what are you supposed to do? say no? you already have two non-artists in the club. so you grit your teeth and allow those people in, too.
and the cycle repeats. friends invite friends, word spreads around. pretty soon, your art club becomes an art-and-movies-and-book club. and then it’s an art-and-movies-and-book-and-instrument-and-comics-and-gaming-and-knitting club. resources are dwindling and it’s hard for the artists to talk about their needs with everyone else chatting away and detailing the conversation, but you don’t kick anyone out because you don’t want people to feel bad. after all, you made this club so that people could feel supported and understood.
then the worst happens: some people join who don’t like art. sure they say that they support artists, but these are the kinds of people who would stiff an artist their commission price, who would look down their nose and critique, who would say they feel uncomfortable with the fact that maybe some artists prefer digital art over traditional pencil & paper on account of it not being “real art”, and they’re very vocal about it.
soon, those artists that you’ve had from the beginning start to leave. they don’t feel safe and supported anymore. they can’t find the resources and help that they need. they feel unsafe and uncomfortable with such a large group inside what was supposed to be their refuge talking bad about them, sometimes even directly insulting them. you’re helpless to watch them go, because you did this. you let everyone else in. you set the stage for this exact thing to be able to happen.
maybe one or two artists stick around. but now the non-artists have made rules about actively creating art within the club’s time. the club is not a safe place anymore. no more artists join your club.
you are alone again, just like you were before your club, because you wouldn’t tell people no.
sound familiar? this is literally what is happening with LGBT centers right now, in the real world. there are LGBT centers where displays of affection are prohibited, where there are people who actively use slurs and insults against LGBT members, but are still welcomed in because of the “+”. this is real, and it’s happening all over.
gatekeeping isn’t fun. gatekeeping sucks. it feels bad. but it is necessary. we have to gatekeep in order to keep our LGBT family safe. we have to gatekeep to allow our LGBT family to have a refuge from the world, where they can be who they are without fear.
the acronym is LGBT. no Q. no plus. LGBT, and that’s it. we deserve to have a place to be who we are, and not have it turned into a microcosm of the outside world just because a few people couldn’t say no.
inclusivity is harmful. inclusivity will lead to the destruction of LGBT safe spaces and resources. inclusivity does infinitely more harm than it does good. please stop being complicit in the hatred & discrimination the community faces from people who are supposed to be “on our side”.
we are hurting, and inclusivity needs to end.
