classical katie

[terpsikeraunos]

when you forget which language keyboard you were using: λολ

[argonauticae]

In this love-story there was a man Who wanted to marry Cassandra And she was Priam’s bright-eyed neurotic Most beautiful daughter And he was OTHYRON the dreamer Who came from Cabesus with no money When he offered his life for her hand Her father accepted And so the dreamer went blushing into battle and died And everyone laughed and laughed Except Cassandra

from Memorial: An Excavation of the Iliad, Alice Oswald (via argonauticae)

[melodyandviolence]

Sicily by  Giulia Bellato

[ommatidia]

[mutamur]

please don’t read plato’s apology this literally will suffice 

[classical-katie]

alternative titles for ancient lit

oedipus the king: the worst episode of 'how i met your mother' ever

oedipus at colonus: oepidus rex more like oedipus wreck

antigone: putting the fun in both funeral AND dysfunctional family

iphigenia at aulis: agamemnon why don't you agamem-not

medea: reasons why couples therapy is necessary

agamemnon: agamemnon is agamem-no more

the iliad: wars and homos

the odyssey: finding nemo

the poetry of sappho: the Gaysthetic(tm)

the aeneid: aeneas and the trojans' not-so-excellent adventure

the satyricon: no, we don't know what's happening, either

the poetry of catullus: sappho, if sappho were a 13 year old boy

the poetry of horace: 1000 reasons to hate trees

commentary on the gallic wars: a catalog of interesting gallic peoples whom caesar utterly destroyed

[aenigmaepoche]

Acropolis Athens,Greece Barbara Blue© 2015

[virginiawowlf-deactivated201802]

virginia woolf wrote an essay called ‘on not knowing greek’ and i relate to that immensely

[onestarbookreview]

“Maybe the Romans read it and got so bored that they decided to dissolve their empire.”

[volchiitza]

Erechtheion, Acropolis of Athens

[last-of-the-romans]

The Painted Garden of the Villa of Livia.  

[via-appia]

Ostia Antica (7th century BC - 9th century AD), harbor city of Ancient Rome, an excellently preserved ancient site.

(1,2,3)

[classical-beauty-of-the-past]

Arch of Titus and Colosseum by giannidedom 

[oedipusmotherfuckingtyrannus]

THE CAMBRIDGE LATIN COURSE: STAGE I

CAECILIUS (OUR HERO) EST IN FUCKING HORTO (GARDEN). CAECILIUS IS ALWAYS IN THE FUCKING HORTO. HE HAS A WHOLE VILLA, BUT HE’S ALWAYS JUST FUCKING AROUND IN THE HORTO. 

METELLA (HIS WIFE) IN ATRIO (ATRIUM) SEDET (SITS). METELLA IS A FUCKING GREAT HOUSEWIFE. SHE JUST SEDET ALL THE TIME. USUALLY IN THE ATRIO, BUT SOMETIMES IN THE HORTO TOO. SHE NEVER AMBULAT (WALKS) THOUGH. NEVER. SHE COULD BE ANYWHERE, BUT SHE IS ALWAYS SEDENS. ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

ANCILLA (A SLAVE GIRL) PULCHRA (PRETTY) EST. ANCILLA GRUMIONEM (THE COOK) DELECTAT (PLEASES). GRUMIO FUTUTOR MATRIS SCELESTUS EST (A CREEPY MOTHERFUCKER).

[oedipusmotherfuckingtyrannus]

HOW THE FUCK DID WE GET 2000 NOTES ON THIS QUASI-EDUCATIONAL BULLSHIT?

[americanfeminist]

[many-wings-deactivated20141225]

Myth - Muriel Rukeyser, originally from Breaking Open (1973)

[dukeofbookingham-deactivated202]

Petition to stop calling ancient Greek and Latin ‘dead’ languages and start calling them ‘undead languages’ because they’re still up and lurching around and will absolutely ravage your brain

[classical-katie]

someone: the classics are so refined

diogenes: i'm gonna throw a chicken at plato and then i'm gonna reward myself by whacking it in public

vase painters: how many dicks do you think are enough? at least 5

aristophanes: you need 3 fart soundboards to perform this play properly

lucian: the moon is full of gay people, anyway let's argue about whether sleeping with girls or boys is better

catullus: i want to make out infinity times with my girlfriend

the entire roman senate: ostensibly we are a respectable body but actually we are a preschool full of man-sized babies

ovid: haha then what ;)

horace: i fucking hate this goddamn tree also hey wanna hear about a wet dream i had

martial: you're hot but you queef too much so i don't want to have sex with you

someone: such elegance

[onestarbookreview]

“It definitely was not lesbian enough, first off.”