THIS ACCOUNT WAS PREVIOUSLY ARCHIVED DUE TO CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION.
SEASONING CITY POLICE DEPARTMENT ‘SCPD’ HAS CONFIRMED THAT THE ORIGINAL CONTENT POSTED WAS UTILIZED AS A FORM OF COERCION AND/OR INDOCTRINATION BY THE WORLD WIDE ORGANIZATION KNOWN AS "CLAW”.
CURRENT RUN OF THE ACCOUNT IS IN ACCORDANCE WITH PAROLE, REQUESTED BY PREVIOUS VICTIMS TO GIVE PROPER CONTEXT TO THE ORGANIZATION AND ITS LASTING AFFECT. ANY QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS WILL BE MONITORED BY OFFICIALS BEFORE POSTING OR REPOSTING.
VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED, REVIEW WITH CAUTION.
With regards to the viewer,
My name is Suzuki Toichiro, 鈴木統一郎.
As the previous overseer of the, now dissolved, organization it has been brought to my attention that I am now responsible for providing the state of affairs on all past occurrences within the confines of my business. I do not encourage you to reach out, in fact I implore you to avoid such a strenuous decision. For I doubt any response would leave you, the reader, satisfied. My motives are not for mere mortal comprehension and I have no intent to reiterate in layman's terms. Consider this my personal discretion to you. If you choose to continue on your own accord, I will assume you understand any consequence that may come forth.
As for my previous men, I do not aspire to contact any of them, and reference to them will be met with nothing more than a blank response. I am not here to reconnect, nor am I here to inspire some kind of uprising.
I am here to reimburse.
Thank you.
INTERJECTION BY SCPD WILL OCCUR, CENSORSHIP APPLIED.
PREVIOUS MEMBER’S ON PAROLE ALSO HAVE BEEN GIVEN ACCESS TO THIS ACCOUNT, TO REACH OUT TO ANY OF THE ‘ULTIMATE FIVE’ OR ETC SIMPLY REQUEST BY NAME. YOUR QUESTIONS WILL BE ANSWERED BY THEM.
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AVAILABLE EX-MEMBERS ARE AS FOLLOWS:
Shibata Hiroshi
Hatori Nozumo
Minegishi Toshiki @pur-poppie-wrose
Serizawa Katsuya @seritsuya
Shimizaki Ryo @thesecondndbestesper
╚═══════════════════════╝
ANY OTHER MEMBER CAN BE REACHED OUT TO AS WELL, FROM ANY DIVISION, THE LIKELIHOOD OF THEM RESPONDING IS BASED ON THEIR OWN PERSONAL ACCORD.
╔═════════════════════════════════╗
ooc;
@ra-con-teur / @al13n-upr1s1ng here !
have a toichiro / claw member ask blog . any character who doesn't have a blog can be asked for/about here !! for the couple that are tagged please go to their accounts to ask .
this is gonna be fun to write for omg ... no rules here, have fun . but it would be nice to also get some serious asks here and there, too ! otherwise, go crazy . :)
tags;
suzuki response - #big boss
suzuki mindless - #ramblings of a lunatic
scpd censorship - #SCPD
any other character response - #(character name) / #member answer
You just showed up on my dash for the first time, and I know nothing about you. But I like how you respond to asks like a civil war soldier writing letters to his elderly mother to let her know he's still alive.
Anon,
I am sure this was intended with respect, so I will see it as a compliment. I try to carry myself with a commendable cadence.
What truly made you think you’re above everyone else, cause I don’t think it was powers. You once saw yourself equal with your wife. In order to love someone you acknowledge you’re on the same level. You loved your wife. That’s obvious to anyone, so what made you change? Was the greed to rule truly greater than any ounce of romance and happiness harbored in your relationship? It’s obvious it outweighed your love for your son, as horrific as that may be, but the way you speak about your wife is far different than anyone you’ve spoken about before. I guess what I’m asking is…was it worth it?
Anon,
As I grew into adulthood it was always evident to me that I was different. I took that knowledge and twisted it to the difference meaning I was above, I was better. Throughout my life this notion effected every decision I made, it led me to navigate through things with the idea that people needed to understand my reality. I was hardly human, so I treated the rest of the world like they were beneath me and accepted the idea that one day I would make them understand.
Then I met my ex-wife. We were in college together, both business majors in our own respects, and she was simply brilliant. She was a kind woman, exceedingly intelligent, and knew how to humble whomever she needed. I respected her after a few encounters, which was not something I was accustomed too. She was still second to me, that idea never changed, but she was as closest to an equal that I had ever experienced. She had no powers, she wasn't unique by any regard, and yet she remained with my attention. She comprehended by obvious narcissism in a way no one ever had. She was the only thing that reminded me, by a sliver of a chance, that I was human. She pointed out my flaws, catered to my development, and she pushed me to be better. The issue was that I was so far separated from the idea of my own humanity that it never made any genuine impact. I knew I was superior, but the difference with her was that I had the intention of bringing her with me. I acknowledged our different views, and to ensure she'd fit in my perfect world I pushed her away from what I had begun to create. My neglect began out of shame, that's what my psyche has told me these days. The attempt was to shield her from things, knowing she didn't agree, to then one day rope her back in when the dirty work was completed.
She always knew what I was doing. She always advised against my actions and through night-long fights, screaming matches until her voice grew hoarse, and the resulting pitiful attempts at begging for me to understand, it eventually wore her down. I wore her down by never being. Never being there, never being sympathetic, never being human. I had assumed I wasn't of the same species because of my god-like abilities, but that couldn't be farther from the truth at the beginning- I had then created the reality in which I was separated, I had damned myself. I had made my believed reality everyone else's. Just not in the way I had hoped. So, she gave up.
After she left, her memory never did. The conviction to have her beside me once I succeeded never fleeted, despite its completely unrealistic circumstances. My desire to control, it bled into every piece of my life, and it did inevitably outweigh my devotion to her. I couldn't 'belittle' myself to be what she needed. She did what I now would've told her to do if she ever tried to stay any longer. She did was I deserved, what she deserved, what was right. She protected herself; she gave up on me. She made the right choice.
As for Sho, he was different. I have always had pride for that child. He was going to stay beside me whether he chose to our not, and that was the stark contrast between how I treated him versus his mother. I inflicted what I did upon him in the desire to teach him what I thought he ought to be taught. It wasn't correct, and it sure as hell was not justified, but the intention I had with him is not something easily explained. I cared for my son, and I still do. I have come to learn that the care I have, however, doesn't mean I get to destroy who he is to fit what I want. I cannot create the perfect child; I just must see his imperfections as such. I must act unconditionally. I must be the father he needs; he has no expectations to do the same for me. He gets to be who he is, there is no changing required or expected of him. I, on the other hand, must.
I wish my ex-wife well. I hope to never speak to her again because I want her to have peace without me. I do not deserve the closure of her forgiveness, and I pray to all I don't believe in that I never receive it. I want her to live on as she is, content and satisfied in every choice she makes. I want my son to live the same. So, to answer your question, no. Nothing was worth it. No amount of reassurance could ever make me believe that.
I am satisfied that they are perfect as they are without me, and I carry on caring for them just as I always have- just in a much more... human way.
How does it feel to be brought down by the very things you dismissed? Was it worth losing everything just to prove you were the strongest? Did all that power now stripped away from you make you a better father? A better husband? A better man? You played God just to prove yourself to be nothing but a mortal. What’s the plan now? Spend the rest of your days as a powerless, broken man, or will you try to atone to all your sins? This blog, your words written in it, your reconnecting with those you've left in your pursue of some twisted form of glory—is it all worth it? What do you hope to gain from all this? And are your spiky-ass eyebrows just naturally like that or did you make them look that way on purpose to seem more intimidating?
darkkitty1208,
I appreciate you approaching me with something genuinely worth my time. Quite often on this forum people find themselves more entertained by penniless requests or dumbed-down questions they know won't be met with any worthwhile answers. I regard your kind of approach with a great deal of respect, I want that to be my first impression in response to you, as it seems this will lead to a long-winded comeback.
The fallout of my attempt at total domination was the only plausible outcome, it's something I refused to acknowledge as a possibility through my clouded lack of morality, and it has haunted me, for lack of a better term, thus since. Nothing I stole, no attention I garnered, not a single person who followed my man-made faith was worth what I culminated in the end. My loss was a natural consequence for my cruelty, and I find myself often thankful that things did not turn out in a better way for me. I deserve the outcome, I welcome the outcome, and I respect it with what's right in my mind.
Ultimately nothing I did was worth what it inflicted on others. Nothing I sought was worth the loss of what I already had. I had become a twisted individual, and it is something I will continue to carry inside of me. No matter my attempt at atonement, no matter who's forgiveness I am offered, I will remain twisted deep within. It is who I have become. It is not something I can run from. I have accepted this and I have thus chosen to act against my nature, for that is what is right, and it is what people genuinely deserve. I move forward acting despite my wretchedness, not to gain back what I lost, but to give what's needed to those whom I have affected.
To be clear, I live despite my actions because people I've harmed deserve to gain back what I took from them. They deserve to watch me sit and rot as I mend my mind. I don't live to take back anything for myself; I would let myself die before I allow that to happen once more. The plan is to continue, to give, to assure, to let people find peace in the consequences I'm rightfully facing. I don't hope to gain anything in return.
In lesser words, nothing was worth it. I chose to live without regrets, of course, but that's not without caution. That's not without allowing myself to be meek now. I acknowledge what has happened, but that doesn't mean I'm satisfied with the fact that it did.
I hope this offers enough insight.
Also, that's just how my eyebrows sit. I don't cater to them much.
i know you're already kind of in an enclosure because. jail. but if you were in a different one, what would it be like? i'm talking like your optimal environment
also i accidentally called my friend by the name of your organizations leader and they told me that they aren't fond of being called by the name of a "former family neglecting terrorist" ,
felt like i should tell you
(im 100% able to use powers and whatnot) !!
p.s. if this is the police and not claw this ask is satire
Anon #2974097399,
As said several times previously, and considering the nature in which this blog began, you should be fully aware that Claw is disbanded. Has been for numerous years now, if you're ever trying to apply for something you should possess the right mind to do the proper research. It's socially disappointing that you haven't, clearly.
As for your friend's response to my comparison, I don't pay those kinds of things much mind. Observations will be what they will, some accurate, some disproportionately random, I let them pass me by.
If you had the opportunity to be outside for a day completely of your own volition, what would you do?
Anon,
I would visit the old tea shop where my wife and I use to frequent. The taste of their drinks were lasting and bitter, but I preferred it that way. The place always had odd, reoccuring faces, the two of us would create stories about how and why they were there.
A simpler time, for sure.
I also have a grave I would visit, but that's the lesser rest of this hypothetical day.
