Life was like a box of chocolates

You never know what you’re gonna get

[clementineesotsm]

Took a long vacation

No makeup, just Jay-Z

You were balls deep, now we beefin'

Had me butt-naked at the MGM

So wasted screamin', "Fuck that"

Love me now, but I'm anythin'

Hurry now, baby, stick it in

'Fore the memories get to kickin' in

It's too late

I don't wanna lose what's left of you

How am I supposed to tell ya?

I don't wanna see you with anyone but me

Nobody gets me like you

How am I supposed to let you go?

Only like myself when I'm with you

Nobody gets me, you do (do)

You do

Nobody gets me, you do (do)

You do

Nobody gets me, you do

You do

Nobody gets me, you do

Took me out to the ballet

You proposed, I went on the road

You was feelin' empty, so you left me

Now I'm stuck dealin' with a deadbeat

If I'm real, I deserve less

If I was you, I wouldn't take me back

I pretend when I'm with a man, it's you

And I know that it's too late

I don't wanna lose what's left of you

How am I supposed to tell ya?

I don't wanna see you with anyone but me

Nobody gets me like you

How am I supposed to let you go?

Only like myself when I'm with you

Nobody gets me, you do (do)

You do

Nobody gets me, you do (do)

You do

Nobody gets me, you do (do, ooh)

You do

Nobody gets me, you do (do, ooh)

Nobody gets me, you do

[clementineesotsm]

Day 25: Something Inspired Of The 11th Image On Your Phone

The picture was me doing video call with my ex-colleague, so my ex-colleague from India initiate the sudden call for fun for he is in exhibition and reminds him of our time in the past

It was a nice short chit chat and we plan to meet up on November Thailand exhibition, which i committed to join despite not working in the same industry as them anymore

I feel grateful to worked with them for almost 5 years

The bond created during that time was timeless, we seem to be a friend outside work, even though we don't always update each other, but when we meet up or have a sudden call the chemistry still there naturally

They are like a cool brothers to me

Hope to see them all in Thailand this year!

[clementineesotsm]

Day 24: Write About A Lesson You've Learned

I feel like i already learned a lot in life, but recent new endeavor i put myself into (read: work) makes me realize i still has more to learn

I have met a lot of people with a lot of personality possible from best to worst, but somehow nothing prepares me from todays encounter where everyone and everything goes non linear, unsafe, not ready, no rules, unclear direction, also a LOT of conflict and incompetency's

I get used to work in environment where no matter how difficult, everything seems under control, but now, i feel like i cannot hold on to anything, nothing to and no one to rely on, i don't even have that many confident to myself, very unlike myself

So apparently years of experience and lesson that we think prepares us for anything not always the case

Apparently, if you brave enough to put yourself in the new environment and challenge there will going to be a lot of new issue and things you need to learn to level up

And that needs an open mind, patient and self motivation, nobody going to help you, but you can always looking for a necessary support whenever you reach your limit

Also you don't have to know EVERYTHING because there were actually people with a different function will work it for you

The biggest enemy now is to learn how to be a master to your mind so that it did not scare you too much, it ended up ruining a good chance to be the best version you can be!

PS: i did a bit already, i hope i given a chances to fixed it

[clementineesotsm]

Day 23: A Letter To Someone, Anyone

Hi

There's this line is the lyrics of Ariana Grande Intro (end of the world) songs from Eternal Sunshine:

Then I had this interaction I've been thinking 'bout for like five weeks Wonder if he's thinking 'bout it too and smiling Wonder if he knows that that's been what's inspiring me Wonder if he's judging me like I am right now

Basically what i feel about you

I never meant it to be anything for i don't know whether this could be anything

But, just wants to throw it to the universe, encounter someone intriguing was always thrilling

I like you seems smart, calm and nice, looking pretty decent, and fun, not annoying at all

Wish we could be friend, for i wanted to know more what is on your brain, your opinion about things

Not to push us to be anything but a good friend

At least at the beginning? lol

[clementineesotsm]

The Moon is Here !

I read someone posted that Ramadhan always came in time when you needed to be close to God a little bit more than ussual

That words lingers in me for i am

I need all support from good people, God or even universe to get through this learning, training phase

It has been so challenging, i am a bit too scared to walk it

But I’m curious and something in me says this is something that i can successfully passes

But it seems blurry right now it seems i have nothing to hold

I worked hard in preparing myself, i think i am ready

My last straw is my faith that i am well taken care of and i am capable enough to do it

I extremely need all the prayers in the world and this months came, just when i needed it the most

✨✨✨✨

[gusucloud]

The First Frost 难哄 (2025) + animated posters

[clementineesotsm]

Pretty!

[clementineesotsm]

Day 22: Write About Today

I have so much going on my head right now

Also still in disbelief that 2025 will be the year that i learn a lot, got rejected, got bullied, feeling helpless, being misunderstood, but also it give me a lot of enlightenment, revelation, bravery, and the ability to move on.

As of today, its been quite, as it feels like calm before storm, i kept overthink something unnecessary, i need to convince myself to just get up, eat, took a shower, pray and eventually writing this, just to make this day less depressing and to take me out of my head

What i want myself to believe now is, i know i am not perfect, i make mistake a long the way, i shouldnt be define by only my mistakes, and i hope eventually i believe that i tried my best to always be better

And if some people never understand the effort i make, i hope i am strong enough to moving forward in this life without them

I will break down many times for sure, because i cared about them too much, but if the feelings is not mutual, it will be too embarrassing to be in a party alone, right?

[clementineesotsm]

Day 21: Write About LOVE

The most complicated feelings, for someone as deep as me

Love is something that i have so much and wish to share it with the people i care about in every chances i had

But as i grow older, not everyone will be comfortable with this amount of love i gave and got overwhelmed and framed me into being too much all the time

I tried my best to press it down, i hurt myself in the process

People said maybe its just that i havent met someone that worthy or comfortable to accept the love i have, but at this point in life, i have doubt there will be anyone? (as in romantic partner)

Also same in family, the way i showed love and care are often misunderstood as controlling, too much or overwhelming. As if nobody on my side, well there are some that understand me much, and i always grateful they existed

But, what is love actually? Why is this kind of feelings could make and ruin someone day or even life. This feelings that is so hard to get for we often looking for it in wrong person, direction or place.

And what i learn along the way, it is making me in such incredible pain to carry so much love without a home, without appreciation, it gets a little bit lonely to be the only person that carries the burden having too much love or loving too hard without the right type of reciprocation, or maybe i have to high of an expectation, i ended up hurting myself

So, for me, Love in complicated, it was never simple, it was something that i need to earn as a child, as a teenager, as an adult. Because most of the time, i am not enough.

And until i healed myself, i dont think i am capable of attracting the right kind of love ? even though i always hopeful and say it many times in my prayer that i am worthy of love and ready to receive one.

[clementineesotsm]

Day 20: Your Celebrity Crush

Gosh i have many

But it was always between the boy/girl next door type or walking red flag! No in between

I even created 1 board in pinterest for all of my celebrity crushes https://pin.it/6oy5HEl3R

From Lady Diana, Nicole Kidman, Timothee Chalamet Dylan Wang, Lee Kwangsoo, Takeru Satoh and many more :)

[clementineesotsm]

Day 19: My First Love

He was the first to actually speak to me

We are close without even trying

It was just very unfortunate i mistook his friendliness for Love, it was one sides for a very long time

But this feelings i have towards him was quite important, for it was the start of me realizing what kind of quality i look for in someone and in relationships

Easy, safe and fun

[clementineesotsm]

Day 18: 30 Facts About Myself

1. I was extremely shy for almost 20 years of my life

2. Hate to play Barbie during my childhood

3. Play football on elementary school until my brother punish me not to because its not so girly (hate that!)

4. Eat ice cube a lot

5. Play basketball at school

6. Learn reading through newspaper at 5 y.o

7. Learn english since 6 years old

8. Learn Korean since 2007, can speak a little

9. Has a curly messy hair naturally

10. Im in a school marching band!

11. Hate Accounting

12. Love noodles a lot!

13. I cherish people who gave me a good book

14. A big Westlife fans! Since 1998 up to this day lol

15. Moved deeply by The Beatles songs, they are just different

16. I am also a big BIGBANG fans

17. I take Movies seriously

18. My love for Pasta is huge

19. I cannot drive

20. Apparently I’m good at cooking

21. I love writing

22. Learning Guitar now

23. I have tatto ✨

24. I win Wonder Girls dance competition and had a chance to meet them on and off stage

25. I am the only woman out of 4 siblings

26. Love Badminton and Football a lot, or sport in general (i love to see a pursue of passion)

27. I love the smell of vanilla or jasmine

28. I’m a big Sailor Moon fans

29. I love dog

30. I love cool weather

[clementineesotsm]

Day 17: Ways To Win My Heart

Be smart

Feed me

Always be on my side

Respect me

A nice smile

Dress up nicely

Fun

Passionate

Compassionate

Speak to me

Discuss

Appreciate little things

Polite

Speak soft to me

Curious

Books!

Movies

Music

Travel

Take it easy, no rush, slow burn

Easy going

Private

[clementineesotsm]

Day 16: Someone I Miss

Someone that i haven’t seen in a long time

Someone whose eyes always meet mine, pretty smile, goofy, smart and matured

Leader figure that i long for

He has so much potential, to be the cool brother that i always wish i had, or a partner in a romantic relationship that i waited for

But i settled being just a good friend

At least we are fun

I hope its always mutual

[clementineesotsm]

Day 15: If You Could Runaway, Where Would You Go?

If it’s a place i would love something like San Sebastian, Edinburg, anywhere Switzerland, Tallinn or Augsburg, somewhere quiet, vintage and comfortable. It will be best if its smells good too!

Or anywhere, where i could totally be in peace, alone, or together

Far from everybody

For a very long time

[clementineesotsm]

Day 14: Describe Your Style

Sporty, comfy style with a touch of feminine every now and then

But most importantly need to be comfortable because it will decide whether it will make or break your day and whether you can walk in confidence for the day

Recently i feel like styling my self in feminine way, i think i have matured

And just feel pretty in high heels

[clementineesotsm]

Day 13: Favorite Book

This was impossible for every book has been my favorite

On my early days i will choose Little Prince and the Chicken Soup for the Soul Series as my all time favorites, maybe thats why this empathy i had came from? And i remember my aunties give me a lot of Asterix Obelix Tin tin Sailor Moon comic books for me, and a lot more stories with moral notes at the end of the page

I also remember this 1 book i hold close to my heart, Hikayat Burung Bul Bul, i dont even know if they have any English title for this, but this is the story that is so good you kept thinking about it for a long time

During school days probably Harry Potter, teenlits were popular, and a lot of manga about romance horor and mystery basically

But overall i love something poetic, and something with a layer meaning. I love anything from Kahlil Gibran that i have red, recently i am lost in the world of Fyodor Dostoevsky’s White Night which probably i nominated as no 1 on my list for now, and poet book from Mario DE Kali, Hari Tuhan Bagi Kalanuk is no 2 definitely!

I also loved Midnight Library, Agatha Christie and sometimes something related to economics, i dont know why but i feel economy has a lot potential than just to associate it with finance or money, economy actually has big influence in society like the book Freakonomics describes. I need to thank the writers for writing this books!

[clementineesotsm]

Day 12: Favorite TV Series

I watched a lot of it as a coping mechanism

There were a lot of unforgettable stories like the Sandman, Chocolate, Daredevils, Wandavision, Loki, the Red Sleeve, Adolescent, Behind Your Eyes, and seriously so many many many more

But i remember my first ever tv series that is memorable to me is NCIS with Gibbs and his teams. I follow the throughout 11 season? But then got a bit bored because it’s been too long of seasons, oh and of course i love Friends and Sex and The City. I still use Sarah Jessica Parker perfume up to this day.

Recently what i hold closed at heart will be Ted Lasso and Fleabag

Ted Lasso for its fresh idea about an American Football coach who become English Football coach, the series gives you comedy, drama, romance all in 1 package, the dynamic happens between the coach and the players and the management and also with people surrounding them respectively create an amazing solid stories that you cannot forget. There a lot of warm moments, happy, sad moments that i cannot let go for months and now we got season 4!

And the other is the GOAT ! FLEABAG

This is beyond smart writing, this is writing with empathy and deep understanding in human emotion. The imperfect characters make it closed to heart and we all love stories that displayed grieving in a raw way. No sugar coating. We also can relate much to the family dynamics, and love, lust. The stories that feels like a hug you will need on your bad day and make you feel understood. And i love how witty it was to keep Fleabag name until the end. I dont even know her name, as if she is all of us.