hOnK hOnK

he/him 19 // evil darkfic sideblog

[clownpenis413]

davesprites the type of dude to lay eggs on johns bed and then be like " no bro that was a naknak or consort or some shit. i dont even lay eggs " and the eggs in question are hardshelled and Absolutely from a bird and davesprite starts sobbing and hides away in some fuckass part of the yellow yard before coming back a week later acting like nothing happened

[clownpenis413]

i have like multiple people that im Just mutuals with on both my main and on here and its scary . like do they know that both of those r my accounts

[clownpenis413]

dave bedwetting

hes on the meteor and, for the first time in what feels like Forever, can finally relax... until he starts waking up to wet sheets

ofc. rose is going to give her opinion on the matter. and will Absolutely be So Very Helpful and Totally Not sabotage daves attempts for it to stop

[vanitysova]

*nudity

[plushrump-dot-com]

[generalbitchfest]

That WIP DirkDave fic in the hotel room is Room 09, I believe

Yes, you're right, thanks!!

Well, Room No. 9 specifically.

Which is titled after a game I'm unfamiliar with lol

Here is the link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/51312109/chapters/129650437

"If two people could live here for a month without dying, that sounds promising." Dirk reasons. "I guess it just depends on the shit they have us do." Dave swipes around on the tablet a little and finds the button that says "Current Task". "That's the other thing." Choice A: Subject B will extract 600 ml of blood from Subject A. >Read more detailed information about proper blood drawing procedure. Choice B: Subject A will extract seminal fluid from Subject B. "This is so fucking astronomically not funny."

[clownpenis413]

kankri bullshiiit because im bored

i like the idea of him undergoing medical abuse and essentially being mire of a " specimen " than a person. a lot of these hcs will reflect that

he has an ear tag similar to one that you would give to a sheep. this is both for the dehumanizing factor and also the hehe haha troll jesus factor

he has a device monitoring stuff like his pulse on him . At All Times. it sends the data to the team of people i can assume are responsible for him

hes not allowed shoelaces or string or any of that, his whistle is on a very flimsy plastic string

also fuck you that whistle is a comfort object i do what i want

cronus is the only alpha troll who treats him like the Adult Person he is, the other trolls tend to look down on him in some way. kankri may not exactly... Like cronus . but cronus is fond of him. this is because cronus is humankin and he feels like him and kankri are DifferentTM in the same way

kankri has a grade A choice slice waygu fuckin ass. he has the most cake in relation to body proportion out of any homestuck character. people dont realize this because he always wears a baggy turtleneck

homicidal ideation? homicidal ideation. yes

im soery back to cronus . i love the idea of him following kankri around like a puppy. wet dog of a man

kankri has a fixation on dry tech guns. he couldnt give a single fuck about wet tech guns

ayeaus. thank tou for reading my poast

[clownpenis413]

i always feel bad critiquing darkship media bcs i dont want to come across as an anti but Also some of ya'll are coming from a place of bigotry with this

[homesmutconfessions]

Daves dick is short asf who else w me🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

-🐎

.

[youlookbetterdead]

I can make anything about incest if I put my heart into it btw. nothing will ever stop me. I’m pure of heart due to it being filled with incest

[halfswordkind]

screw karkat happy 612

[clownpenis413]

EVERYBODY SHUT UP ABOUT EVERY OTHER SHIP AND START TALKING ABOUT UUCEST NOW

[sparkling-fantasiia]

incestuous

[clownpenis413]

no shit sherlock

[sparkling-fantasiia]

but people call it incest

i have nothing to do

[clownpenis413]

yea thats very clear

[clownpenis413]

EVERYBODY SHUT UP ABOUT EVERY OTHER SHIP AND START TALKING ABOUT UUCEST NOW

[sparkling-fantasiia]

incestuous

[clownpenis413]

no shit sherlock

[queerramen]

slight freak version :P

[clownpenis413]

hey guys im back

[clownpenis413]

would there be any way to private/temporarily disable a blog?

[clownpenis413]

one time me and my friend went to jc pennys in dirk and dave cosplay to get shitty photos taken and the photographer callef in her coworker? romantic partner?? idk, who knew homestuck and they directed us to do some gay ass poses. that was scary