rock bottom

she's putting on her lipstick, turning up the music. slippin' on her b l a c k d r e s s, saying, "you can do this". climbing in the front seat, looking out the window - going through the motions - trying just to l e t g o. of the tears that she cried, no solid goodbye. tonight it ain't gonna show and even though she knows that it ain't gonna fix it, she's putting on her l i p s t i c k

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

➽ feels like home

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Keep reading

[cnskyeo]

              Being pulled off the ground left Kyeo a little speechless, but he soon went breathless again once he was on the lap of his lover, his cock being palmed. A sigh left his lips and he rolled his head to the opposite side that AJ had his lips on, his skin happily taking his teeth into them. His eyes fluttered open but soon fluttered back shut because of the way he felt being stroked by his boyfriend. His cheeks were hot, his head was spinning, and he now knew what AJ meant when he had practically said he had enough of this prolonged foreplay. Kyeo wanted to be fucked, too, and so he grabbed AJ’s hand and he pushed it off swiftly.

              “I’m doing it,” he then mumbled.

              With that said, his hand ducked into the cushion of the couch, pulling out a condom the both them had stuffed in for moments like this, struggling to unwrap it because of how horny he was. But he did get it open, and he put it on AJ with his help. He then brought his hips up, soon lowering them upon his lover, a soft sigh leaving his lips. Kyeo pressed himself further down slowly, his hand slightly shaking as it took AJ’s again, guiding it back to his own cock to palm like he had been doing before. All of these things mixed together were already sending the older boy into a turmoil, but he had to keep on and suppress himself, even if it was hard to with AJ.

              So his hips began to move, rolling and diving back down at a slow pace to begin with, his body getting used to being connected with his lover’s once more. His head rolled back for a moment and he swallowed hard, calling out a sweet, “Aiden,” before he leaned back forward again, pushing every inch of his body against AJ’s warm one, and definitely not failing to let his lips collide with AJ’s as well. But the sloppy kiss only lasted a moment before Kyeo felt his throat begging to moan once more, and so he did, his lover’s name leaving once more in a blissful groan, deep and scratchy.

              “Aiden!” he breathed again, his hands cupping his neck in effort to have something to hold, because they were too antsy to be anywhere else. He was too caught up in the way the younger male’s cock slid in and out of his ass, sending spikes of pleasure throughout his bones and to his head. His body was slowly overheating from it all, but he tried his best not to get carried away. Yet, at the moment, all he could think about was being pinned down, AJ screwing him senseless while Kyeo begged him to do all sorts of things that the other male had already done to him.

              And that thought pursued him to move his hips a little fancier, sitting further down on his cock with every push of his body in that direction.

[yewonbn-blog]

poise and rationality.

[yewonbn-blog]

[...]

Key’s question, while unexpected, does nothing to throw her off; she’s more comfortable talking about books than she is pretty much anything else, can find more comfort in a familiar character than she can in most human beings around her. So she glances around, conspiratorial, and waggles her eyebrows. “I finished rereading Murakami Ryu’s Coin Locker Babies last night, and The Secret History a couple nights before that.” She sits up a little straighter, brushes her hair over her shoulder, grinning in that clandestine way that only reading puts over her. “Let’s see…I read a nonfiction on large, improbable, and impactful events on history a couple weeks ago…and then there’s my reading list for school…”

It shouldn’t have to be said, but Oh Yewon very rarely finds a book she doesn’t like.

[cnskyeo]

              The book talk sent a wave of relaxation over him and Kyeo found himself slumped over the table, elbows piercing into the hardwood and cheeks in his hands, he smiles at the girl and listens to her talk about other novels. Truth be told, Kyeo doesn’t read much outside of his own work unless it’s a really good book, but he does like to read short stories, because he doesn’t have to sit in one spot for too long. Yet, he still found himself reading books during the nights he got tired of playing solitaire at the receptionist desk at work, but they were usually books he found sitting around in the lobby that either patients had left or donated for the people who would wait for long periods of time. He had read all the magazines, so why not focus on a novel for once?

              “Changes of scenery actually do help,” he answered first, his eyes lighting up. “Like in a place like this, so many people come and go that it leaves me with so many new characters to make or add to stories, and sometimes it’s hard to focus with so much inspiration swirling around--” and he was rambling, so he went quiet for a moment and put a soft smile on his lips again. It was then that he realized just what was going on with him.

              It sounded stupid, but he had a hard time getting along with females. Yewon was a girl and he seemed to be so calmed by her talking to him, and maybe this was a step for him, a stretch of faith that he could do this. Perhaps he would stick her in a new novel, though she may never know it, because he would keep that a secret until he could figure out just where to fit her in, but he would. She proved to be an interesting character anyway, and he liked that, so he stared a little harder, listened a little better, and made sure to catch little things that she might not even know about herself so he could study her.

              “But what’s your favorite book ever?” he then hit her with, his head cocking to the side. She had listed a few books but he wondered what her favorite was, because he might have to go check it out from the library or something. “I have a night job that practically speaks boredom, so I really want something to keep me busy while I’m sitting around after I beat solitaire about five times.”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ wait up

[cnskyeo]

bnjooyeon:

Kyeo was lecturing her but Jooyeon was too drunk to notice that that was a little odd. It was always Aiden the one who would give her lectures yet she sat and listened to him quietly. “But what if I was drinking because I want to forget someone?” Jooyeon asked, looking into Kyeo’s eyes. “Actually, make that two someones.”

She sighed loudly and closed her eyes, leaning her forehead on his shoulder instead. She had always had such bad luck with men, something Jooyeon just never understood. “You know…I told you before about my first boyfriend in high school?” she asked. “We work together at Simmer…but I saw him in Amber the other night. I don’t know why but…I…I didn’t want him to see me as a dancer in Amber.

“And this other someone…I don’t know who he is to me, oppa…I…You know, oppa, I am so jealous of you and Aiden. You’ve both got someone you love and care. He doesn’t even know I like him that way…ah, never mind,” Jooyeon sighed. “I won’t get so drunk again, oppa, I promise you.”

Jooyeon held her pinky up, waiting for Kyeo to hook his with hers. She would try her best not to drunk text too but Jooyeon knew herself. Every time she had one too many to drink and she had her phone with her, she would pick someone random to text. There was no reason behind it, she just wanted to text.

              The conversation had gone from amusing to a little sad, and Kyeo felt a bit more awake now that the tone of her voice told him that she needed someone to listen. Kyeo was more than happy to when the subject of the matter was somebody special in Jooyeon’s life.

              He first took her pinky, sending her a smile and once they had finished the promise, Kyeo wrapped an arm around Jooyeon and pulled her a little closer. “Don’t feel bad about it,” he told her in a calming voice. “And, also, don’t be jealous, either, because the both of us have come a long way from where we were to get to each other, and you have too, it’s just a matter of time before you find that someone in your life and you two will stick.

              “You know I met AJ online, and I never thought I would be living with him today, but I am, and it’s something that makes me forget about my past and all the things I suffered getting to him today,” and he left it at that, unwilling to elaborate on what exactly happened in his past. Jooyeon knew a little bit; but that little bit proved to be too much for Kyeo’s liking. It was hard enough with her knowing that he was gay and had a boyfriend, but he had come to some terms with that.

              What little bit she knew was that his mom abused him, but she didn’t know the depths of it. She didn’t know that his mom did it because he was gay, or that first boyfriend watched his mom beat the shit out of him. And she didn’t know that AJ didn’t know these things either. It was a secret that nobody knew, really, and he wanted to keep it that way, at least for a little longer.

              “Why doesn’t he know you like him? You just don’t want to tell him?”

[astrodaily]

Spring Breeze | do not edit/crop photo!

[cnskyeo]

⤞ drinks on me

[kim-dojoon-blog]

[...]

“He moved here a few months ago but he came to visit a while back…we became friends then. I don’t know if he’s seeing anyone now but…ah, this dongsaeng seems like he could use a nice boyfriend like you. Right? It would be cute~”

Another laugh escaped Dojoon as he put his phone in his pocket and slapped at his cheek, “So cute right? Yeah. I think so.~”

[cnskyeo]

              Kyeo’s eyes practically lit up. Dojoon was gay?

              His heart was racing, and he couldn’t tell whether it was because he was so taken back and surprised or because he was full of anger, enviously wishing he could openly admit he was into guys like Dojoon just had. Kyeo hated his sexuality and here Dojoon was, telling Kyeo about one of his previous relationships that had gone wrong seven years ago. He pitied him - but he also didn’t; wasn’t that what he deserved for being homosexual?

              Suddenly it had turned into a hook up conversation, but Kyeo was going to be very adamant that he didn’t want to go out with anyone right now. He had a boyfriend, which Dojoon didn’t know about of course, and even if he didn’t, he felt too busy with work and his novels for dating. But somehow, Kyeo’s eyes were wandering onto the phone of Dojoon’s, checking out the boy on his screen and his eyes practically popped out when he saw who it was.

              He didn’t have to tell what his name was - Kyeo already knew. Kyeo almost slipped up, too, seeing his current boyfriend on the screen of the drunken boy. His eyes were wide and shooting back and forth from the phone screen to Dojoon’s musty expression, unable to speak for the moment. But he had to say something or Dojoon might take his silence for speechlessness - and that was what it was, but he couldn’t have the other boy knowing that.

              “I-I don’t like guys, that’s not my thing,” he spat out, trying not to sound too insulting. “Maybe you’re into guys, but I’m not, plus, I bet he has a girlfriend or… uh, boyfriend or something. I don’t need anyone right now, either, no less a stupid boy.”

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

➽ feels like home

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Keep reading

[cnskyeo]

              The sight of AJ being breathless was breathtaking and Kyeo could only comply as his body shifted all sorts of ways just to force off his pants. He could care less about where they were placed as well, all he wanted was Aiden, and cleaning up clothes could be prioritized later. His lips pursed and his whole body felt the weight of arousal and lust sink over him, as if forcing his body to push against AJ’s in a hard thrust. His cock was swollen, pushing tightly against the fabric of his boxers, and all Kyeo could find himself aching for was to see if AJ was feeling the same way.

              So he worked on his own, pulling the shirt off of his lover before climbing off his lap for what he thought was going to be moment, but he ended up staying off as an idea soared through his head. Slowly, he dipped down, pushing AJ’s legs apart and pressing his knees to the rug spread across the floor. His hands were pushing and pulling everything he needed to in order to get the younger male’s pants off of him. His eyes were traveling up his toned chest to his face, and then back down to AJ’s cock pressed against fabric once his pants had been pushed aside.

              Slowly, he pushed his lips against the fabric to start with, his eyes shutting softly and his mind focusing on anything he could to make AJ feel good in the moment. But that got boring, soon enough, and without permission, Kyeo practically ripped AJ’s own underwear off, discarding it with the other forgotten clothes as his free hand wrapped steadily around his cock. Kyeo couldn’t help the smirk that played on his lips as he ducked his face down, slowly yet eagerly pushing AJ’s cock into his mouth. It was warm, delicious, and every time Kyeo felt like he had forgotten how it tasted. With all the hunger and lust he could gather in his body, he began pushing and pulling AJ out of his mouth, his lungs breathing in the scent of their sex and blissfully exhaling the same thing.

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

➽ feels like home

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

[...]

And when he pulled away again, his tongue briefly darted out of his mouth to lick at his lips and AJ let out a short, breathy laugh before he asked, “Do you want to go upstairs or?” His hand came up to Kyeo’s face, fingers lightly caressing his cheek in the most adoring way, and his eyes held nothing but affection for the man in front of him. “Because I’m fine with staying right here - it’s your call.”

[cnskyeo]

              There was no better feeling than AJ’s lips pressing down his neck, and the boy found himself stretching his neck to the side so more of it was exposed. A sigh left his heavy lips and he closed his eyes, enjoying the touch for the moment it lasted. Only when AJ placed his hand on the older boy’s thigh did Kyeo there was something that felt way better than this, and they were on the right track to getting it.

              It was a fact, Kyeo was almost always filled with lust and right now was no different. His hands were desperate to touch and his body was desperate to be pleased, as AJ most likely already knew all this, anyway. Kyeo hummed quietly and pulled away from the kiss once more, his lips burning and his breath hot. Instead, he had dived into AJ’s neck this time, leaving wet licks and kisses and even small bites to show affection. That was coupled with the heavy roll of his hips, pushing down onto his lover with ecstasy running through his veins now.

              But there was one roll down that did it for Kyeo, and he pulled away from AJ’s neck to hide his face for a second before he threw his shirt over his head, tossing it onto the other end of the couch. “I love you,” he suddenly spoke in a desperate whisper, his hands pushing against the bare skin underneath his lover’s shirt. There was a look in his eyes, a feeling in his bones, a heave in his chest… and Kyeo knew it was all proof of how much he really needed AJ in this moment.

              So he told him with a quiet, “And I need you.”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ wait up

[cnskyeo]

bnjooyeon:

There was barely anyone Jooyeon could really be herself with but with her neighbours, Kyeo and Aiden, she was completely herself. She did not have to put on the nice girl facade. She could count on them to take care of her, protect her. She could let her guard down around them and know that she would still be the safest girl in the world.

She giggled at Kyeo’s comment. “Not as much?” she hummed. It was true that Kyeo did not show his emotions like Aiden would but she knew deep down, he cared just as much as Aiden did. Most of the time, it was because his boyfriend had beat him to the caring and worrying part that became the reason for why Kyeo did not ‘worry as much’. Jooyeon sighed contently and wrapped her arms around Kyeo’s, closing her eyes. “Thank you, oppa. Thank you for waiting up for me,” she whispered softly, letting out a yawn straight after.

But the mood changed at what Kyeo said. Jooyeon lifted her head from his shoulder and raised an eyebrow. What did he mean that her text was not her telling him that she would be home late? At least, that was what she remembered as being in her mind when she had her phone in her hand with her fingers typing away.

Jooyeon let go of Kyeo’s arm and reached behind her, grabbing her bag. She pulled her phone out and unlocked the device, clicking on the message icon. Kyeo’s name was right at the top and when she tapped on it, she groaned softly. Kyeo was right in saying that she only sent emojis. And it was not just one of two of them but a whole block paragraph just filled with different emojis. “I must have thought the emoji board was the keyboard…”

              By now, Kyeo’s eyes were opening and closing profusely, and he wanted to go back to bed, but he wasn’t going to leave Jooyeon out here by herself. A sigh left his lips when she went to check on her phone, unsure of what to tell her at this moment. He turned to her after she spoke, sending her a tired smile, “Look, you shouldn’t drunk text like this, trust me, many nights in my childhood were spent getting fucked up and I always got a nut punch once I got home from my mom because of the shit I’d send her.”

              While ‘nut punch’ was probably the wrong phrase to use, it kinda fit, because sometimes she would just hit whatever was closest to whatever she was swinging; whether that be her hand, foot, leg, or an object. Knowing Jooyeon, too, if she was to drunk text like that all the time, she would fuck up a relationship with someone, whether she cared about them or not. “One day,” Kyeo explained, his eyes shifting away again, “you’re going to do something you regret while you’re drunk if you keep up what you’re doing now.”

              Kyeo was lucky to not get drunk so easily anymore. With AJ, he knew that things would go wrong in a second if he was to get too intoxicated, because he did things he would always regret… at least, he did when he was younger. He couldn’t remember the last time he was severely drunk anyway, and besides a beer a day, the only time he really did drink was when he went to see Jooyeon perform at the bar.

              “You better actually listen when I say that, too,” he laughed a little, patting her leg. “Trust a primary source when I say you don’t want to get drunk too much.”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ drinks on me

[kim-dojoon-blog]

[...]

His voice was a bit more quiet now; stage two of being drunk - emotional.

“Kyeo ah, make sure you cherish your relationships. They are important! Because like my mom said - home is where the heart is. And your heart is placed carefully with another person…Yes, like my heart is placed with my little kitten; Jin.”

So much for wisdom.

[cnskyeo]

              By now, the touch was something Kyeo was growing used to, and so he allowed the other boy to latch onto his side, but the younger male also did not show any signs of affection back. His eyes were, instead, darting around to see if people were looking, and as soon as he saw somebody staring, that ‘used to’ feeling was gone. He knocked Dojoon off of him and tried not to get angry by taking a deep breath - what if they thought the two of them were together?

              But that was when he said it - ”like my mom said - home is where the heart is” - and he couldn’t decide whether to let his heart fill with hate or flutter with love. A mom’s words didn’t matter to him at all, but home was where his heart was, at least, if that home was where AJ was. He let out a sigh through his nose and said, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, please,” to try and brush him off, but his words were getting to Kyeo.

              Kyeo had never even said he was with someone - how could Dojoon just assume he was or talk like he knew? Kyeo hummed quietly and then said, “If I was in a relationship, that’s none of your business, so why do you care?” although it sounded awfully cold and like a dead giveaway. Why would he say that if he was not in a relationship? The last thing he was going to do was expose that he was dating another male - he was not drunk enough to do that. Dojoon, though, might, and so Kyeo pressed him instead, his lips pursing as he asked him about his own love life.

              “You talk like I’m in a relationship, but are you even in one? And your kitty doesn’t count.”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ drinks on me

[cnskyeo]

bndojoon:

[...]

“Oh, you wanna hear a song?” the bouts of random things blurting from his lips seemed to be endless; but alas - even while drunk, Dojoon thinks of music. It’s actually funny how the twenty-eight year old still has a pretty amazing singing voice while intoxicated.

If only he didn’t sing in English.

(*) As he sang, his voice would raise lower and higher with the random emotions running through his mind. It was a wonder his voice actually didn’t crack.

              Now that he knew where the other lived, he could make a beeline for it, although Kyeo was still a little bit new to the area, so finding it would be a bit difficult. He pulled out his phone, instead, but before he could even unlock it, the other had his head on the younger male’s shoulder. Kyeo felt so nerved, so uncomfortable, but he tried his best to be patient, especially since nothing he said would probably get to his head. With a sigh and tense shoulders, he began to type in the villages into his phone, but he was practically startled with another question soaring his way - did Kyeo have a girlfriend… or boyfriend?

              Luckily, the male had distracted himself with asking about directions, and Kyeo had a sigh of relief slipping from his lips as he went back to his phone. “Dojoon, shut up,” he found himself saying, hoping the drunken boy would not take it to heart. Kyeo wanted to get him home without causing a ruckus or a public disturbance, although he would not be surprised if many people knew Dojoon because he was a street performer. Nonetheless, he never performed drunk, except now, and so Kyeo knocked his elbow into his side and said, “Hey, I said shut up!”

              His hands were practically shaking with both nervousness and anger that had both been because of Dojoon’s drunken state. He has to ask about relationships, he then had to start screaming words to a song Kyeo actually understood because he knew English, too-- but none of this was what Kyeo anticipated when he asked the other to come out for a few drinks with him. A few, was what it was, but suddenly, something clicked in his mind and as he had the directions up on his phone, he looked back at Dojoon and spoke, “You say, Sangwoo and Haesoo used to date?”

              Boys - two boys? Well, maybe that made Kyeo feel a little bit better, but Dojoon was drunk, he had to remind himself, and he could be lying, or just downright telling stories to try and get things out of Kyeo, and it was then that the younger boy regretted even asking about that. “Ah,” he spoke again, shaking his head, “Don’t answer that, just come on, it’s this way--” and he trucked on, as if he was dragging Dojoon along with him.

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

➽ feels like home

[crxsam-deactivated20190118]

[...]

He meant it when he told Kyeo he was content as long as they were together. As much as AJ enjoyed taking him out to different places, he started to learn that his boyfriend was a lot more comfortable staying at home, and in the end that was the most important thing. A soft, “I love you,” fell from his lips, words he uttered less often than he wanted to, but instead tried to express through the little things he did for Kyeo every day. “You have no idea how happy you make me.”

[cnskyeo]

              And it was in that moment Kyeo forgot he had his own slice of pizza, as he was too busy focusing on AJ and the way he kissed the boy’s lips as if to taste the pizza together - although that sounded a little gross. Kyeo’s lips curved into a smile as well and he closed his eyes for a moment, only opening them when he realized he wasn’t alone in this moment, but that his boyfriend was sharing it with him too. And hearing those three sweet words fall off his soft lips like that - ”I love you,” - it only made Kyeo want him more, and he let out a small sigh as he pressed his lips to the other’s cheek softly.

              “I love you too.”

              It was hard to say that - it was hard to admit that he loved someone, especially someone like AJ. It sounded pathetic and sometimes Kyeo hated the way that he still wanted AJ, but he did, he didn’t know how not to. As time went by, he still needed AJ, and he was worth everything he went through to get to him if it just meant that he was going to spend his days like this; sitting on the couch with beer and pizza, staring at each other like time had stopped and they were the only two people in the whole world. AJ was that breath of fresh air, and he always named it as the reason he woke up every morning - to take that first breath of fresh air.

              His eyes gently traveled down AJ’s body and back up, staring at his bright eyes and pink lips, wondering if he could get away with doing something, anything, with him right now. He pushed his head against his lover’s for a moment before tearing himself away and allowing his lips to fall against AJ’s ear with a small, “You make me happy too - but maybe you can make me happier?”

              Kyeo pulled back, his mouth trapping the end of the pizza in a large bite to fuel him. Once that was down his throat, he pushed his lips back against AJ’s, a smile curling onto his lips once more as he tilted his head to the side. Even if it just meant a little more touching, a little bit closer, a few more kisses, Kyeo wanted it, and he felt like he craved it and needed it now that he was thinking about it.

              Pulling away once more, Kyeo let his lips part for just a moment before he pursed them in another silly smile. “Pizza is good,” he mumbled, his eyes rolling, “but you’re better, you know.”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ drinks on me

[kim-dojoon-blog]

[...]

Dojoon reached into his pants and fumbled for his wallet, “I - I can’t let you pay for it all though, lemme leave a tip - whoops!” his wallet fell on the table and a bout of giggles left Dojoon as he took out a few won and placed them on the table, before shoving his wallet back in his pocket. “That should do it!” Luckily for the intoxicated male, he never cared too much cash, so he didn’t leave an extreme amount of money.

“Ah, Kyeo ah~ Can you…Uh, take Hyung home? I wanna go home ~ But I don’t think I can take myself.” Even drunk he had some sort of proper thought. His hand reached out as he took a hold of the younger’s arm, “My life is in your hands dongsaeng ah~”

[cnskyeo]

              And here came the nonsense talking. He was spilling about how Kyeo was his dongsaeng now, something that the boy didn’t really know how to reply to. He barely knew what to think about that, either, because he barely knew the boy for more than at least a few days or so. The last thing he really wanted was to be responsible for him because he had that title in his life - but it seemed that Kyeo was not the one to make that choice, and his eyes were buried into the check once it was brought back to the table. Yet, he was still interrupted by Dojoon--

              He accepted the money to go towards a tip and pushed his body from the chair, his bag going with him. Kyeo then went to help Dojoon up when his arm was grabbed. The younger male felt inferior and a little helpless. If it was anyone else, he would have knocked them away, but it was Dojoon, a drunk Dojoon at that, and so he let him do that, albeit being a little uncomfortable with the hold. The corner’s of his lips twitched into a frown, but soon put on a straight face as he led the boy towards the door, pushing and shoving people out of his way.

              “Hyung,” he called out softly once they were outside, “I don’t know where you live, you’re going to have to tell me, or else we’ll be walking around forever.” And perhaps a drunk Dojoon would be okay with that, but a half sober Kyeo was not, and the alcohol in his system was starting to make him a little grumpier than usual. All he wanted was to go home to his boyfriend - not be pushed and pulled around by another man who he didn’t really know enough about.

              Nonetheless, Kyeo started to walk in one direction, allowing Dojoon to follow in whatever way he wanted to. “I need you to tell me where to go,” he repeated, his eyes gazing around in front of him. “Okay?”

[yewonbn-blog]

poise and rationality.

[yewonbn-blog]

[...]

To her great shame and consternation, Yewon actually knows very little about the writing and editing process, not being a writer or editor herself – at least not yet. She doesn’t tell a lot of people this, hasn’t even mentioned it to her own brother, but she has no idea what she’s going to do with a degree in Literature, other than let it sit pretty on her wall. She does not say this to Key, though not out of a desire to keep mum on questions, but rather because she can’t stand the idea of not being as smart as she seems, even to a stranger. “That’s understandable,” she tells him instead, “I’m sure it’s a lot of work. In the meantime I’ll just reread your other novels. Kind of win-win, if you ask me.”

[cnskyeo]

              Signing something? Now it was Kyeo’s eyes that lit up, his heart beating a little faster. He had signed a few novels from people stopping him maybe once a month; excited teens and even adults with a hefty, “Seongkyeo, please, sign it? I love your work, what’s next?” and every time he would do as asked, the thought of pushing someone away never falling onto his mind. He loved the crowd, he loved being recognized, and for once he felt a little too proud of himself; he knew all too well that would not be something he would get used to, though.

              “Don’t feel bad about it,” he finally told her. And with that, he leaned over, skimming his bag for something useful he might be able to give her, whether she would actually want it or not was beyond him, and ends up pulling out a few sheets of notebook paper stapled together. “Ah,” he lets out, placing it on the part of his computer where it was smooth, flat, and perfect for using as a surface to write on. A pen to the top sheet, he signs his name, sure not to write over what is already on the paper, and then slides it over to her. He then explains.

              “I have no use for this anymore,” but that came out wrong; he wasn’t giving her trash! “Ah, well, I mean, now that the novel is finished… The King of Torts wasn’t my best novel but it was one of them, and I think you should have it since you’re just--” and he paused, his emotions coming up too soon, and too much. He was never so expressive as he was, at least, not with anyone besides his partner, and he finds himself sighing with a shy smile, “you’re just really nice. You know it’s- it’s not easy being here for half a year and trying to make it as an author. I’ve only published one book in Busan and that was The Chamber, which I did when I got here.”

              Maybe he was talking too much, or maybe not even enough, but he was still talking, and this stranger now fan somehow made him feel a little comfortable. Before friends, boyfriends, people, all he had was writing, and that was what brought him to where he was today. With a finger pressed to his chin, he asked, “What other good novels have you read?”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ drinks on me

              Dojoon came into his life one sunny afternoon on a walk home from the grocery store. Kyeo was just walking by the park when he had found himself wandering in, the weight of his groceries growing lighter with every step closer to the beautiful rhythm he was hearing flow through the wind. It was not long before he had found the boy upon a bench, playing his guitar and singing to the silence of the people strolling, and Kyeo threw in some change he had gotten at the store, but also stood there and listened. All it did was fuel was his imagination; ideas for new novels and stories were appearing his mind as he took in the lyrics the boy sang. And there was no doubt he introduced himself after.

              Kyeo offered to take him out; take him to anywhere he wanted where they could sit down and talk about their creativity together. So what if the songs he sang weren’t his? Kyeo could help him find some lyrics of his own, and they found themselves gathering together at the bar he only knew by the one Jooyeon worked at. Come to find out, it was also the one that Dojoon was a bartender at, and he supposed that was why the two of them were easily in and sat down somewhere to have a conversation. With his bag hitting the floor, Kyeo pulled out some paper and a pencil.

              But what was supposed to be creative work had soon turned into personal talk, the two sharing their artistic differences and similarities instead, but things were turning into even more chaos with the more Dojoon was having to drink. Kyeo drank way too much to be any kind of lightweight; it took at least 6 to 7 beer bottles to get Kyeo drunk. What he finding out now, though, was that 6 or 7 might as well kill the other boy, and when the third one was placed onto the table, he kindly asked the person waiting on them to stop bringing him alcohol. “I don’t care if you know him,” he had said, “don’t fucking do it.”

              Kyeo suddenly realized what he got himself into. He didn’t know where this boy lived, he didn’t have anyone to call for him, and he was certainly not going to bring him home to Aiden. Dojoon didn’t know he was gay, he didn’t have to know, and bringing him home to another boy was sure to spike his interest and send thoughts to his head that Kyeo did not want him to have. So that left one question as he was slid the bill--

              Fuck, what was he going to do?

[cnskyeo]

⤞ wait up

[cnskyeo]

bnjooyeon:

Jooyeon frowned, leaning back to look at Kyeo’s back. “But you’re not bleeding,” she said. She then smacked her hand a little too hard against his back, rubbing against where she kicked him. “I’ll get Aiden to kiss it better later,” she giggled softly, giving his back a soft pet before sitting properly, resting her chin in her palm with her elbow on her knee.

She was starting to sober up a little but Jooyeon was still very much intoxicated. She knew she was a lightweight but that never really stopped Jooyeon from drinking. It would be so much worse if she was there with her neighbours, considering that Kyeo was a drinker himself. Letting out a sigh, Jooyeon rested her head on Kyeo’s shoulder, closing her eyes. She was tired from work but could not quite sleep either, since she was still buzzing a little from the alcohol.

“I…had a few drinks,” she admitted. “And the music was so good so I had to stay,” she giggled. She had completely forgotten that she texted Kyeo though. She did not even know what she was texting when she did it, let alone why. “I don’t know…maybe I texted you to say I will be late?” she asked, now resting her chin on Kyeo’s shoulder to look up at him.

She grinned and poked Kyeo’s cheek. “You were worried?” she asked. “Don’t let Aiden hear you say that,” she whispered, pressing her index finger to his lips. “He would say that he worries more than you do,” she laughed.

             That was embarrassing, to say the least, hearing her talk about how Aiden was going to kiss his back to make it better. Kyeo had a feeling he might want to make it worse when he found out that Kyeo was not in bed and nowhere to be found in the apartment. He prayed the boy would not wake up, but that was all flushed off his mind when Jooyeon started to talk about her night to him. It all started with a few drinks.

             And for some reason, there was a warm feeling in his chest with Jooyeon rested her head upon Kyeo’s shoulder, and the tired male smiled, looking down at her to see just how exhausted she was herself. He let out a small sigh and gave her head a gentle pat. He knew how a few drinks worked with her - a few was probably what she remembered but he imagined she must have had a few too many to have been texting Kyeo without a clue. Although, a skinny girl like herself was pretty much unable to take even 2 beers lightly.

             “Hey,” he then called out at her comment about Aiden, his lips unable to hold back the smile that was forming. “He’s a bitch when it comes to worrying, because all he can do sometimes is stick his head in negative thoughts, but I can be worried too, you know, even if it’s just, uh,” and he paused, his eyes shifting out to the road once more, “not as much.”

             It was true - Kyeo had very few people he actually cared about enough to worry where they were and what they were doing at certain times. Jooyeon and Aiden were two of those people, and that was when he remembered something else she said. He quietly laughed.

             “And that text was not telling me you would be home late. Unless that’s what your emojis meant.”

[yewonbn-blog]

poise and rationality.

[yewonbn-blog]

[...]

Then her gaze, idly wandering, finds his laptop, despite having acknowledged it before, and it occurs to her that working means he’s writing something new. Her heart flutters anew. “I’m probably about the millionth person to ask you this, but what are you going to do next?” She points at the laptop, eyebrows raised, trying to be polite but really wanting to be insistent. She can’t wait for him to release something new, and it might be a little Stephen King’s Misery, but she would really like a chance to know what’s to come.

[cnskyeo]

              Compliment after compliment poured out and Kyeo had already drowned in the positive river she had flowed towards him. For once, all he could do was smile, wondering what else she was going to say about his works and even when she popped the usual question he got from people who knew about his works, he was so eager to answer her because she had practically made his day. He let out a soft sigh and rested his head in his hand.

              “Please,” he first started with, shaking his head against his hand, “don’t be sorry for anything, you’re not interrupted, if you really need to know, I was actually taking a break to surf around online because my fingers hurt…”

              But then he perked up, his back straight and his hands pushed into his lap. “What am going to do next?” he then repeated, his eyes also wandering around the small shop. His coffee was probably cold, his laptop’s screen had already dimmed, but he was way too into this girl who had sat next to him to realize any of these things, and he was trying to debate on information he should give her and what information he should keep her waiting for. “Ah, okay, I can tell you a few things, uh,” he started, his voice trailing off once more.

              He had actually been writing three books at once; how he kept track of it, he barely knew sometimes, but it was a chore to handle all of his notes because he never knew what story he’d be in the mood to write. So far, he had the most muse for one called The Confession - which he had been writing today, and so he thought about a detail or two and explained it to her in the vaguest way possible. “It’s about--” he started, but then stopped for a second. “Uh, it’s about a boy who is wrongfully convicted, but nobody believes him, and it’s a race against the death penalties clock’s to set him free of his charges.”

              But Kyeo had already finished two-thirds of the book, so he knew what happened to that boy, and a smile was plaguing his lips as he thought about it. There was not always a happy ending - this one was no exception - but he would let Yewon think what she wanted until the book actually came out.

              “It probably won’t be done for at least a few more months. You’re probably familiar with how the writing and editing process goes…”

[cnskyeo]

⤞ coffee & coping

✏ editing... @bnjonghyun

              There was no doubt he relied on his neighbor for details about the others, especially having moved in about six months prior. Kyeo was fairly new to the residence, but Jonghyun was one of the first people he had met because of their eagerness to pop up at his household with a plate of cookies their fiancee had made them. It was definitely shocking for the male, but he lived, and those cookies were actually pretty good. It didn’t take long for him to start getting along with the other, which was something that was actually a lot easier to do than he would have thought. Maybe that was why they were going on a little lunch date today--

              Pushing open the cafe door, he let his eyes scan the room with slow turns of his head. He was searching for the neighbor, wishing he had just gone back home to meet up with them first instead. But no-- Kyeo had to stop by the bank and a few other things before he went out to lunch today, but now he was in the situation where he couldn’t-- oh, wait, there they were. Kyeo smiled shyly and waved.

              His feet carried him over to the table for two and he slid down, setting the bag he had bringing down his shoulders onto the ground. His lips parted to let out a small sigh, but he still sent the other another smile as he said, “How’s Rian doing? And, uh, how about you, too?”