Colby Appreciation

[colbyjacksmack]

I forgot it was Corey La Barrie's death anniversary / birthday and now I'm sad. I was reading posts about him and its crazy that it's been 6 years. The first time I met him was in La with our friend and I remember him falling asleep with his head in her lap and when Todd went to wake him up she gave him the mom look and all he said was "yes ma'am" and brought her a drink lol. I think I still have a picture actually. I should send it to you guys.

OMG yes! Send me that pic! I don't think she has any pics of Corey. She hates pictures of herself. He was literally the softest squish. Especially around her.

Crawford's lil baby was born on his birthday!

I remembered, but I didn't want to bring it up and make everyone sad. When I saw she posted I felt okay posting about it.

I do remember him falling asleep on the lounge at the bar, lol. And Toddy is a goofball chaos boy but he's also a squish.

[golbrocklovely]

there are whispers... that dan and phil might have collabed... with sam and colby.

if that is the case................. prepare for me to be the most insufferable lol

[colbyjacksmack]

mehaixndkekhsbzb WHAT

[caranerdjoy]

Grief is weird.

I’m sorry I’m bad at grief.

I find important things that need my attention to guilt me into getting my shit together instead of grieving.

Grieving feels selfish.

But I’ve realized it feels like I forgot you and I hope you don’t feel that way.

I’m not a cryer. I don’t cry.

I’ve been crying all week and I couldn’t figure it out until your sweet face popped up on my FYP and I remembered you died 6 years ago as of 4 days ago.

I’m wearing your hoodie to bed tonight and I hope you’re happy in whatever existence you found after this one.

[colbyjacksmack]

Corey was the epitome of a smol bean. Snuggles personified. A goofy goober of the highest order. The team mascot but for every team in the league.

Corey had a soft heart and an infectious and joyful spirit.

[colbybrocksmolder]

I just need to tell you that me (bi woman) and my now wife (bi trans woman) used a line from one of your stories in our speech to our friends and family at our wedding last weekend. I know that sounds crazy but we met in the S&C fandom and you and silentexplorer18 were both of our favorite fanfic authors.

I’m sure with enough digging you could figure out who at least one of us are but I just came here to tell you how much this fandom (specifically on tumblr) has meant to us over the years and that I still read Notebooks from time to time.

“To say that either of you were easy human beings to love 24/7 would be such a hysterical lie you’d probably laugh so long you’d forget why you started laughing at all.”

Maybe one day I’ll be brave enough to post the video. Not a dry eye in the house.

I hope you continue writing one day.

WHAT?! This is so fucking cute!

I do believe I remember a message about you meeting your then girlfriend in the comments of a fic!

Y’ALL ARE MARRIED NOW?! I feel so old 😩🤣🤣

I love this so much!

@silentexplorer18 is still one of my favorite writers!

I hope you post the video one day! This is too precious!

I make new pages when I write for new people but if I ever get back to watching Sam and Colby I’ll try my hand at writing for Colby again.

[colbyjacksmack]

👀 I have a secret…I know who this is!

[colbyjacksmack]

I DIED.

I was eating tacos and almost inhaled part of one of them.

JAKE!

[caranerdjoy]

third nosy party here. Post the boy!

I really missed tumblr. Also, I’m confident this anon is Cece.

[colbyjacksmack]

How do you know when it’s meeeeeeee

[caranerdjoy]

You’re such a dork 😂 YOU already know who it is. You’re so nosy you forgot you already knew the tea 😂😂😂

[colbyjacksmack]

But you right

[caranerdjoy]

third nosy party here. Post the boy!

I really missed tumblr. Also, I’m confident this anon is Cece.

[colbyjacksmack]

How do you know when it’s meeeeeeee

[golbrocklovely]

has there been any update on Colby's cancer? Did the surgery do its job or does he need a round of chemo?

he just did a little update on xplrclub. he has an oncology appointment soon, and that's when he'll know whether or not he'll have to go thru chemo.

he also said that his tumor blood markers are going down, so that's a good sign that he may not need chemo if it's low enough :)

[colbyjacksmack]

❤️

[colbyjacksmack]

So happy to see Colby in such high spirits following all of the cancer stuff!

[mikesdeadlove]

I want to say dirty things

[caranerdjoy]

I don’t blame you

[colbyjacksmack]

I call seconds

[mikesdeadlove]

Secondsies or same timesies? 👀

[colbyjacksmack]

The words “omg we could gang bang Mike” just came out of my mouth and my roommate is very confused.

[colbyjacksmack]

Looking back at old shenanigans is killing me 🤣🤣

[colbybrocksmolder]

Soooo Wattpad removed my whole Colby book even though Colby knows it exists and has no problem with it. Wtf.

[colbyjacksmack]

Let’s see if the ticket fixes anything

[ajosieface]

Hmmm. Sounds like a fanfiction that was written by @colbybrocksmolder! You called this. Haha.

[colbyjacksmack]

This never actually happened right? He was just trolling us?

[colbyjacksmack]

I really think someone told him about the imagine and he was trolling us 🤣

[ajosieface]

Hmmm. Sounds like a fanfiction that was written by @colbybrocksmolder! You called this. Haha.

[colbyjacksmack]

This never actually happened right? He was just trolling us?

[berlynn-wohl]

[colbyjacksmack]

Dead

[colbyjacksmack]

Cara you need to start finding crazy things for the boys to do in Tucson since that’s apparently where Colby’s parents are headed.

[colbyjacksmack]

Mount Rushmore

Vs

Mount Stank Face

[secretsforthemoon]

there is something almost shocking in the human capacity for loneliness. i don’t think i exaggerate much when i say i have been lonely my whole life. this is not self-pity, but a simple statement of fact. i continually go through cycles where i think that if i could just be closer to that person i wouldn’t feel it anymore, but it is proving to be more accurate to say i am simply wired to be lonely.

physical loneliness is perhaps the most jarring right now: missing my friend so much there is physical pain in my chest. way past the point of being “cute”–it is selfish. you want that person right now and the fact that you can’t have them makes you angry. we are as emotionally close as ever, almost more so, and yet i find myself constantly longing to touch her. it didn’t use to be like that. i still don’t think i love her, but it is very confusing to know for sure when every part of me wants to curl into her and never let go. aggressively. she is my twin soul. i know i care about her more than friends do or should, but i don’t want to kiss her. so is that just me being overly affectionate? this battle of unknowing is the greatest loneliness of all, because after her there is no one else.

[colbyjacksmack]

For me this boils down to trust.

I think that sometimes you find a soulmate friend that you COULD see yourself with but you aren’t necessarily “love at first sight” in love with. And I think when you find a person like that that also loves you and KNOWS you beyond how most people “know” you and doesn’t judge you or make you feel like you have to be someone else you feel safe with them. You trust them. They feel like home and comfort and love and like they’re just naturally a part of you.

There is something intoxicating about another human being that makes you feel safe. In your own skin...with your real thoughts...at your worst and your best.