You're the difference between hell & home

i wish that i could tell you right now i love you but it looks like i wont be around so you wont know

[trustissued]

Does it ever really go away? That feeling? You know which one I’m talking about. How many times a day do you look back? Why can’t you stop looking back? Do you still think about them? What made your heart go cold? How many years has it been since someone saw the light in your eyes? Do you ever think about that? Who damaged you so bad that you can’t let anyone in anymore? Do you still think about them too? How often does your heart ache? Tell me, what caused that emptiness that you can’t seem to get out. Do you even want to get it out? Tell me why you don’t feel like yourself without your sadness. Where do your memories go? The ones you’ve forgotten. Do you appreciate people enough? One day they’ll be gone. When was the last time you felt genuine love?

[onlineprincess-deactivated20190]

in another universe, we do not remember the pain we have caused each other, we get to start again. we are happy, getting married, living out our forever. we have made it. we do not have to say goodbye. 

[comeh-ome]

WE’RE ALL HURTING OVER SOMEONE

[comeh-ome]

my heart hurts

[onlineprincess-deactivated20190]

my heart will always remain soft towards you, there will always be a part of me that will be here. whenever you need me, i’ll be here with all the forgiveness and hope i have to offer. if you ever need reassurance that you’re loved immensely, i’ll rip open my own heart so you can see how much of you lives inside.

[comeh-ome]

I used to find myself at 4.am with thoughts that made my bones shake and my heart drop but now all I feel is the emptiness where my heart used to be in my chest. When I was a little girl I never would have thought that I would try to slowly fill the holes forming in my heart with temporary highs until one day I woke up with nothing but a gaping hole in my chest. My mother would cry and beg me to stop destroying myself but she just didn't get it. There's a shipwreck inside my heart and the winds keep calling your name. From the moment I saw you I knew you'd hurt me, do you know what it's like? Feeling your heart break before it even happens, but not being able to save yourself the pain because "what if it works out?" It never does but you hold on to those 'forever moments' because it's better than letting go.

How I killed myself from the inside

[trustissued]

sartre was right, hell is other people 

[trustissued]

1. In my dreams we’re walking along the edge of the universe. My love for you, the sun. Time isn’t real here; there’s only us. Forever.  but then again, my dreams aren’t real either. And forever doesn’t exist. 2. Sunsets still remind me of you, and i’m still convinced you’re the one who makes the sky blush every time. But it’s been raining ever since you left. All i ever wanted was to watch a sunrise through sunset with you.  3. We’re together in every universe. We’re happy in every reality. I’m so sick and tired of all these parallel universes playing out in my head where we’re together. 4. I wanted to love you so much, the scars they left on your heart would start to fade until i realized scars don’t fade no matter how much you try. 5. Today my friend asked me “how many fucking times do you think of him?” and i said “once” because ever since i met you, you haven’t left my mind. I guess i should’ve known i left yours long ago.

Lessons on loving you