Comment Zoo

Carefully curated exotic comments, stripped of context for your enjoyment.

[commentzoo-blog-blog]

15% kraut majority.

Yep, its great to see the 15% kraut majority in this country giving us just what we need in terms of technological dominance. We gave them full reign based on the history of what their ancestors accomplished and this is their response to us getting our rears kicked both economically and technologically by other parts of the world - a water slide. Yep, we don't need things like magnetic confinement fusion, improvements in diagnostic imaging, or advances in epidemiology...we need bigger water slides. It seems as long as they entertain themselves that's what really counts.

POSTED BY POSITRON ON CNN

Original article headline: World's tallest water slide to open soon

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Worse.

It's worse when the President says you can keep your health insurance, period, and then takes it away.

POSTED BY ROAD WARRIOR-252445 ON TODAY

Original article headline: 'Too old' Miss Delaware winner sobs on TODAY, says losing crown 'not fair'

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The expertise of MEN.

Hmm... a sperm bank. The bank deposits are supplied by MEN. The bank was invented by MEN. It was also financed by MEN. It probably even requires the expertise of MEN to run it. Other than coming in and opening your legs to have a syringe inject sperm, what exactly does the woman do to facilitate this process? Please tell us, what's it like to live life stupid? When you went to the sperm bank, did you think the sperm came from bulls or horses? Obviously according to your logic, it didn't come from MEN.

POSTED BY JOE5647 ON CNN

Original article headline: A movie about romance and ... abortion?

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Parasitic issues of logistical debacle.

I was once in a situation where the doctors wanted to unplug me from life support; fortunately I and the members of my immediate family know a little bit about medical technological issues, so consequentially, I was not "unplugged." Today, but for continuing parasitic issues of logistical debacle, I am ready to go out and reenter my dutiful role in this society as a law respectful, law abiding, productive person; provided the corpulent mass of illegal, ill informed and apathetic, and/or conflict-of-interest masses of asses that populate this planet keep their scum sucking business out of my business. This is because, when you of have a problem, it is tragic; but if you make your problem a problem for me; then, you and I have a problem. NBC NEWS.com do you people really feel that you are qualified to argue this point with me? You now have my personal ISP contact information, let us see whether you actually have the necessary integrity to actually make contact with me; because if you people do not have the necessary prerequisite integrity to stand right in front of death's door to defend your position, then you jokers are nothing more than a bunch of putz.

POSTED BY KEVINP ON NBC NEWS

Original article headline: Family of girl brain dead after tonsillectomy spending Christmas at hospital

[commentzoo-blog-blog]

Trampled by commies.

Tuffy's victory will be a sign from God that the Tea Party has found the man for the whitehouse. He is used to dealing with bull, he will get the bull out of washington and the markets! He'll rope the donkeys and hog tie liberalism so Job Creators won't be trampled by commies!

POSTED BY JAMESPIEKKO1 ON CBS LOCAL ST. LOUIS

Original article headline: ‘Tuffy The Clown’ Leads Sedalia Person of the Year Voting

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"Michelle."

I can see why Obama is for same-sex marriage. I'm pretty sure "Michelle" is really Patrick Ewing.

POSTED BY STANBOY ON NBC NEWS

Original article headline: Cheeky elf's pose upstages first family's Christmas photo

[commentzoo-blog-blog]

Pear shaped, like a woman.

He appears to be pear shaped, like a woman, or European man.

POSTED BY TEDDYRUXPINLIVES ON CNN MONEY

Original article headline: Teen millionaire is loving Yahoo

[commentzoo-blog-blog]

Statistically speaking.

If he came out as a homosexual, he'd be a hero. Statistically speaking, he probably is.

POSTED BY RUSSTAYLOR ON FOX NEWS

Original article headline: Sen. Alexander says chief of staff investigated over child porn 

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Pithy remarks, with no depth.

The whole concept of Twitter is a joke. Pithy remarks, with no depth. Simple statements for the simple-minded.

POSTED BY TOMMYUDO ON TIME

Original article headline: Here’s 14 People Freaking Out On Twitter After Barack Obama and Raul Castro Shook Hands

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Dumbass freud tryptich.

WAay better than that crap by retard warhol or the dumbass freud tryptich.Still chhildish crap.

POSTED BY PAINED1 ON TODAY

Original article headline: Banksy gas station mural sells for $209,000 at auction

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The Internet is a void.

You’ve made 135 comments on this web site. How does that feel? Are you proud? What will you tell your children, your grandchildren, about your contribution to culture and art? Was it all worth it? Is Internet commenting a hobby that fulfills you on some level? I hope so. Otherwise why is any of this? How will it feel to try and explain to your offspring all the time you spent doing nothing? The Internet is a void.

POSTED BY GETOFFTHEINTERNET ON THE VERGE

Original article headline: Watch Jim Henson's even creepier original cut of the family classic 'The Dark Crystal'

[commentzoo-blog-blog]

Magic prayer rug.

Obama jump on your magic prayer rug and head out to Africa

POSTED BY COKEHEADOBAMA ON FOX NEWS

Original article headline: Nelson Mandela dies at 95

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Males became too famine.

This is the end result of over 60 years of male pacification in Japan, since the end of WWII. Their males became too famine and no longer able to fight in a war. Now this is the new low, where they can't even find a female to procreate and to expand their gene pools.

POSTED BY GUEST ON CNN

Original article headline: All by my selfie! Blogger shows how to take travel photos with an imaginary girlfriend

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Loading up on awesome pot roast.

On the day this film opens, I plan on going to Golden Corral and loading up on Awesome Pot Roast, Bourbon Street Chicken, Clam Chowder and Red Gelatin. Then I intend to go home and fire the entire mess directly into my toilet via my anus. That eruption, and all that will precede and follow it, is guaranteed to be more exciting than the one onscreen in "Pompeii."

POSTED BY LOUIE BEANS ON AICN

Original article headline: More Angry Volcano Action in this New Trailer for Pompeii!

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Fatness is not an opinion.

Really? fatness is not an opinion, so if you oppose fatness, you are not a biggot. Besides, Being fat now is glorified, and excused, while being fit and thin is demonized as fat shaming.

POSTED BY JOEL PEREZ ON CNN

Original article headline: How to make love, not bigotry

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Manmade earthquake.

Let's waste money on manmade earthquake instead of feeding poor hungry people. American capitalism is disgusting and vile.

POSTED BY HOLY BATMAN ON CNN

Original article headline: Rowdy Seattle Seahawks fans register as earthquake during Monday Night Football

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Single mom isim.

So what our kids rank first in facebugger, texting, cigarette, alcohol, drug taking, video game playing, over indulgent parenting, single mom isim, self esteem, early tats, sexting, etc so take that China! Oh and our liberal progressive union Dumbocrat voting teachers union members are the highest paid, and under worker group of anyone in the world take that also China! And to think China is lending us trillion with hopes that the under 30 crowd is going to pay it back, how, I guess we showed um.

POSTED BY ARMY1971 ON NBC NEWS

Original article headline: US teens lag in global education rankings as Asian countries rise to the top