i used to spend hours on tumblr like a decade ago and then this app kinda went to shit.
and now i'm back again. this time i'm using it to just freely talk my shit, be unhinged, drop random thoughts, start genuine conversations but mostly to complain. i have friends i can complain to but sometimes i want to complain about the same thing for the umpteenth time and even i know that that can be annoying for them sooooo this is where i'll be doing that and shitposting as well as reblogging whatever i like whether it's khh, kpop, art, books, music, whatever.
if i post smth you don't like, remember you have the free will to keep scrolling thus protecting your peace and mine too :)
i need this choi seungcheol to put me through a fucking wall ARE Y'ALL SEEING THIS FIRE BUILD?!?!? THE RECOIL?!!?!?? he's got the perfect body idc argue with the wall if you must
You never thought your insecurities would’ve led you to the near destruction of your own relationship.
❧ PAIRING; mingyu x reader
❧ GENRE; angst, fluff, hurt/comfort
❧ TAGS/WARNINGS; established relationship, reader is very insecure, arguing, yelling, swearing, lots of tears, lgbt themes, very dramatic and cliche oop-, panic attack, fainting, hospitalisation
❧ WORDCOUNT; 11.1k
[ part of the Silent Treatment series ]
𐚁₊⊹
▎11 JULY 2025
09:34 p.m.
The echo of the front door slamming against the wall rattled through the house. You stormed inside and without a second thought, you threw your black Chanel clutch across the entryway, and the bag skidded until it thudded against the baseboard.
Your chest was heaving as anger and humiliation boiled within you, so hot it felt like your skin was on fire. There were fast and heavy footsteps pounding behind you. You tried to block them out, but before you could make it to the living room, a strong hand clamped around your arm.
The sudden grip yanked you backward and spun you around so hard you almost stumbled. Mingyu stood inches from you with his jaw clenched, and his dark eyes blazed like he was holding back a raging storm.
“What the fuck is your problem Y/n? What the hell was that back there? Huh?” he spat out.
Your own rage flared. “My problem? Are you seriously asking me that right now Mingyu?” you snapped back, jerking your arm free from his grasp.
“YES!” he shouted like thunder. You didn’t flinch, at least not outwardly, but your heart was hammering inside your chest.
“Because not only did you ruin what was supposed to be a nice get-together dinner party,” he continued, his voice rising with every word, “you made a complete spectacle. You embarrassed Gaeul in front of everyone. Do you even realise what you did?”
Gaeul.
Of course it had to be her. Gaeul was Mingyu’s ex-girlfriend. They were the duo everyone thought he would end up marrying. The two had been together for almost two years, but knew each other long before you were ever in the picture. And even after they broke up, she never really disappeared. She stayed close because she was still Mingyu’s friend, and he still cared about her.
You hated how much that bothered you. Mingyu told you over and over again that he didn’t love her anymore, and that the past was the past. And maybe you believed him most days. But every time Gaeul showed up, that pit of insecurity cracked open again.
How were you supposed to compete with someone who knew him inside out, someone who shared years of memories that you were never a part of?
Tonight was the final straw. You watched Gaeul lean in too close to your boyfriend. You watched her hand brush his arm. You watched her laugh like she still had a claim to him, and it tore every fragile stitch of your restraint completely.
Part of you knew Mingyu’s anger made sense, because you just caused a scene and humiliated someone he still cared about. But the burning jealousy and pride overpowered any rational part of you. You refused to look small.
“She was all over you Mingyu!” you snapped.
“How the fuck was I meant to sit there and let her be all touchy with you?!” you argued back.
Mingyu’s eyes narrowed, and his jaw worked as if he was physically biting back words. “What are you even talking about? She wasn’t all over me Y/n. You’re blowing this way out of proportion!”
You let out a sharp laugh, but it didn’t sound like humor, it sounded like disbelief. “Out of proportion? She had her hands on you the whole damn night Mingyu. Everyone saw it. And you just sat there and let it happen!”
He stepped closer as frustration radiated off him. “What did you want me to do? Push her away in front of everyone? Cause a bigger scene and embarrass her than you already did?”
“Oh, so this is my fault now?” you shot back. “I’m the crazy one because I don’t like your ex-girlfriend being all over you?”
“She’s my friend, Y/n” Mingyu snapped, his voice growing louder this time. “That’s all she is. Why can’t you trust me on that?”
“It’s not that I don’t trust you Mingyu, I don’t trust her!” your voice cracked as you yelled. “And the fact that you’re just sitting there and letting her be all over you, that’s what’s fucking pissing me off!”
Your throat burned. Your eyes began to glisten with tears no matter how hard you tried to blink them away. You hated showing weakness, especially in the middle of a fight, but the hut was too much to overcome.
Mingyu’s face softened for a split second when he saw your eyes shine, but the absurdity of your accusation riled him up more. He ran a hand through his hair, pacing a short step away before spinning back around to face you.
“Do you even hear yourself right now? Do you know how ridiculous you sound?” he questioned.
“You didn’t even give anyone a chance to explain. You jumped straight to conclusions because you were too fucking insecure to see anything past what you already decided in your head” he stepped towards you with dark eyes.
“Let me tell you something Y/n,” he said, breathing heavy.
“I don’t love Gaeul anymore, and neither does she love me. We’re friends, only friends, and that’s all it’s ever going to be. Everyone in that room knew it. You know why?” he paused, waiting for you to look at him.
“Because Gaeul already has a girlfriend.”
The words felt like it knocked the air out of you.
Mingyu let out a shaky breath as he rubbed a hand over his face. “We didn’t just break up because we drifted apart. She realised she was into women, not men. That’s the truth. And honestly? It’s not even my story to share, but you pushed me here” his voice cracked a little as his shoulders dropped.
“If you actually understood how friendships really work, you’d see she wasn’t being ‘all over’ me. That’s not who she is. Gaeul knows her boundaries. She’s not the villain you’re making her out to be” his tone softened at the end, but his words left you stunned and speechless.
Your mouth went dry. For a second, you just stared at him, completely blindsided. “She— she has a girlfriend?” you managed to say with your voice smaller than you wanted it to be.
Mingyu sighed, running both hands through his hair before letting them fall uselessly to his sides. “Yeah. And she’s happy, really happy. That’s why she was laughing so much tonight, because she was telling me about her. But you didn’t even give yourself the chance to hear it. You were too busy glaring holes through her like she was some homewrecker.”
To say you were ashamed would be an understatement. You were embarrassed. The tears you were holding back finally slipped, and you turned your face away, hating how exposed you felt.
“I— I didn’t know,” you whispered as you hugged your arms around yourself.
“Of course you didn’t know,” Mingyu shot back, though his tone had softened. “You didn’t even want to know. You just assumed the worst, like always.”
“Do you have any idea how exhausting it is Y/n? Constantly having to prove that I chose you?” his voice broke, and it hurt more than his anger.
You turned back to face him, and the sight broke you. The hurt in his eyes and the exhaustion etched into his expression felt like a punch straight to the chest.
“If you can’t get past your insecurities, then how are we supposed to move forward? How many more times do I have to prove to you that you’re the one I want? That you’re the person I want to spend the rest of my life with?” Mingyu’s voice trembled, like he was begging you to understand.
When you saw a single tear slipping down his cheek, your heart dropped into your stomach. You panicked, “baby—” you desperately reached out for him.
But Mingyu stepped back. His jaw clenched as he wiped his face quickly, like he didn’t want you to see him break. You flinched in hurt, watching him create more distance between you.
“I need some time,” he muttered with a rough voice. Without waiting for your reply, he turned and walked out the door, leaving you frozen in the silence and your hand still hanging in the air where he pulled away.
You closed your eyes as your shoulders sagged in defeat. The strength left your body all at once, and your hands fell limply to your sides.
A shaky, broken sob escaped your throat before you could stop it. The shame pressing down on your chest was so heavy that it almost hurt you to breathe.
You couldn’t believe it. You couldn’t believe yourself.
Things with Mingyu had been rocky lately. The two of you were fighting more than you ever had before. The arguments that started were small, but they always seemed to escalate into something bigger. And almost every single time, the root of it came back to the same person. Gaeul.
You hated that she was even part of the picture, even if it was “just as a friend.” No matter how many times Mingyu reassured you, it felt strange and uncomfortable to watch your boyfriend stay so close to someone he used to love.
It didn’t matter that they had history, or that they claimed it was all in the past, you just couldn’t wrap your head around it. The idea of your boyfriend laughing with, texting, or leaning on his ex like nothing ever happened made your stomach twist in knots.
To you, it wasn’t about jealousy in the simple sense. It was the awkwardness and the uneasiness of knowing that there was a part of his life you’d never be able to compete with. She had been there first. She knew sides of him you were still learning.
As much as you hated to admit it, you were insecure. You tried to act like you had it all together, and that things from the past didn’t bother you anymore, but deep down, they did.
Your love life before Mingyu hadn’t exactly been a fairytale. The two guys you dated before him each left their mark in the worst ways.
One made you feel invisible, like nothing you did was ever enough to keep his attention. The other didn’t even bother to hide it. He flat out left you for someone else. Both relationships ended the same way, with you questioning what you lacked and why you weren’t worth staying for.
And that kind of hurt doesn’t just disappear, no matter how much you want it to. It still lingers around. It makes you second-guess yourself in moments you should feel secure. It makes you wonder if maybe there really is always going to be someone better, someone prettier, someone smarter, someone easier to love.
So even with Mingyu, who had never once made you feel unwanted, those old wounds had a way of creeping back in and whispering that maybe you still weren’t enough.
Maybe you were still stuck in the past. Maybe a part of you was still carrying all that fear of not being enough, of being replaced the way you had been before.
It wasn’t Mingyu you doubted, never for a second. You knew he loved you. You knew he was loyal, and you never truly believed he would betray you. The problem was you. You were the one second-guessing yourself at every turn. Even after three years of being together, even after all the ways he had shown you that he loved you, that old voice in your head never fully shut up.
You kept wondering if you were enough for him. If one day he’d wake up and realise he deserved better. And every time that fear bubbled up, it always led to frequent arguments. It led to jealous comments and moments that didn’t need to turn into fights but always did.
Deep down, you knew it wasn’t fair. Mingyu wasn’t the problem. Your insecurities were. They were the reason why your relationship was close to crumbling. And no matter how much you hated it, you could see it clearly now. More often than not, the fights weren’t because of what Mingyu did. They were because of what you couldn’t let go of inside yourself.
And today, you could see that Mingyu had finally hit his breaking point. The way he looked at you and the way his voice cracked when he said he needed space, it told you everything. He was done carrying the burden of your doubts. And honestly? You couldn’t even blame him for it.
Because you knew this wasn’t on him. It was on you. You were the one letting your insecurities run the show. You were the one picking fights you didn’t need to start. You were the one who kept pushing even when he tried to reassure you. It wasn’t fair to him, and you knew it.
For the first time, it really sank in. Maybe you weren’t just hurting yourself with all this doubt. Maybe you were slowly tearing down the person who did nothing but love you. And that thought hit harder than anything else.
You weren’t just the problem. You might have been the reason things were falling apart.
▎12 JULY 2025
08:07 a.m.
You didn’t even realise you cried yourself to sleep waiting for Mingyu until the next morning, when you woke up on the sofa. The brightness of the sunlight streaming through the window hit your eyes instantly, making you groan as you scrunched your nose and lifted a hand to block it. Your body felt heavy and stiff from spending the whole night in one position.
When you pushed yourself upright slowly, that was when it hit you. The house was quiet, too quiet. Where was the same hollow silence that settled in after Mingyu walked out last night. And just like that, the ache you’d tried to sleep off came rushing back.
You wondered if he was even home. You stood up and dragged your feet across the floor as you made your way upstairs. Maybe he came back late and went straight to bed, sleeping it off like nothing happened.
You held onto that hope, even as your hand hovered on the doorknob. Taking a shaky breath, you pushed the door open, only to find the bedroom empty. The bed was still untouched and perfectly made, just before you two left.
Your heart sank.
Maybe he left you a message, at least, telling you he was crashing at Wonwoo’s place, or that he just needed space for the night. Clinging to that thought, you hurried back downstairs and grabbed your phone off the coffee table.
But there was nothing. The only notification lighting up your phone was from your friend Minghao telling you that you needed to apologise to Gaeul. Minghao was not the one to sugarcoat anything, his message was just a blunt reminder of how badly you messed up last night.
You weren’t surprised that people were upset with you. Honestly, you would’ve been shocked if they weren’t. The way you acted last night was out of line, and you knew it. “Embarrassing” or “shameful” didn’t even come close to describing how you felt right now. The guilt was eating you alive.
You had to apologise.
Chewing nervously on your lip, you unlocked your phone and opened Instagram. It felt a little pathetic, but it was the only way you could think of. You and Gaeul didn’t follow each other, because you never had any reason to, and you didn’t have her number either. So this was there only way to reach her.
Your fingers hesitated over the search bar. Part of you wanted to slam your phone shut and pretend none of this happened. But you knew better. You made the mess, and now you had to face it.
You sat there staring at the screen, fingers hovering above the keyboard. Your chest felt tight, because honestly, you didn’t even know where to start. What were you supposed to say? “Sorry for causing a scene”? Or “Sorry for being insecure”?
None of it felt like enough. But hiding behind silence wasn’t going to fix anything. If you were going to apologise, it had to be face to face.
So, swallowing down your nerves, you finally typed out a message.
[jeon.yn08] : hey, it’s Y/n. Can we please talk?
⇥ [kgaeul_] : sure
[jeon.yn08] : in person would be better
⇥ [kgaeul_] : okay, where?
[jeon.yn08] : Moonbird Coffee, in 30 minutes?
⇥ [kgaeul_] : 👍
You switched off your phone and set it back down on the coffee table.
A long, shaky sigh slipped out of you as you let yourself sink deeper into the sofa cushions, face buried in your hands.
Every part of you, especially the introverted and stubborn part that hated confrontation, was begging you not to do this. Normally, you’d rather keep quiet and wait for things to blow over than reach out first. But this time, you knew you didn’t have a choice. If you wanted things to get better, you had to swallow your pride, face the discomfort, and actually do the right thing.
The guilt sitting in your chest was hard to ignore, eating at you more with every second that passed. You couldn’t just sit there pretending nothing happened while knowing how much you had hurt someone. Seeing Mingyu so exhausted and hurt last night kept flashing in your mind. If you couldn’t do this for yourself, then you had to do it for him.
╴╴╴╴╴
08:36 a.m.
After forcing yourself through a quick shower, brushing your teeth and changing into something presentable, you grabbed the house keys and stepped out the door. Mingyu had taken the car, so the subway was your only option. Not that you minded much, it gave you a little time to think.
You slid into a corner seat once the train doors closed and, out of instinct, unlocked your phone. Part of you hoped you’d see his name light up your screen, but there was nothing.
Good thing you had your mask on and your hair down. Otherwise, it would’ve been way too obvious that you were biting the inside of your cheek, fighting to keep yourself together from breaking down in public.
Your fingers itched to type out something, but you stopped yourself. He needed space, and you had to give him that. So, swallowing the lump in your throat, you shut the screen off and shoved your phone into your jacket pocket while holding back the tears threatening to fall.
A few stops later, you finally got out of the station and headed towards the café you told Gaeul to meet you at. Your steps slowed the closer you got, and you felt your nerves tightening. By the time you reached the door, your palms were clammy, and you could feel your heart beating a little too hard.
The café was quiet inside, with only three other customers scattered around. It should’ve been comforting, but the calm atmosphere only made your nerves stand out more.
And soon enough, you spotted Gaeul sitting in the corner. Her cherry-coloured hair stood out, so it was easy not to miss. She was leaning back against the cushioned chair with her phone in her hand, looking somewhat bored, like she had been waiting for a while.
You were nervous, still too embarrassed to face her after what you did last night. Nevertheless, you opened the door and made your way straight towards her with hesitation.
As your footsteps drew closer, Gaeul’s attention snapped away from her phone and finally lifted her head. The moment her eyes met yours, you froze for half a second and felt your nerves spiking all over again.
You forced a small, wary smile. “Hey,” almost too quietly. For a second, you weren’t sure she even heard you.
“Hi,” she answered, her lips curving into a polite, almost tired smile. It wasn’t warm, but it also wasn’t cold, and somehow that was enough to make you loosen up just a little. At least she wasn’t glaring at you, or throwing knives at you with her eyes. Honestly, you wouldn’t have blamed her if she had.
You pulled out the chair across from her and sat down, sliding yourself closer to the table. Your hands instantly needed something to do. You slipped your mask off, cleared your throat, tucked your hair behind your ear. You looked at the floor, the table, the window, anywhere but at her face.
Eye contact felt impossible, at least just for a moment.
Of course, Gaeul noticed. She let out a soft sigh, not harsh but enough to tell you she wasn’t here for small talk. “So…you wanted to talk?” she said finally, breaking the silence.
You swallowed and forced yourself to look up. When her eyes met yours, you could see how drained she looked, like she hadn’t slept much. But there was still hurt in those brown orbs, the hurt you caused.
“Y-Yeah,” you stammered.
Closing your eyes briefly, you exhaled. There was no use dragging this out. You had to be honest.
You fiddled with your fingers under the table, feeling your throat tighten. For a second, no words came out. But eventually, you forced yourself to speak.
“I— I’m sorry,” you blurted out.
You chewed on the inside of your cheek, and forced yourself to keep going. “I’m sorry for last night. I’m sorry for everything I said and the way I acted. I know I crossed a line, and I know I made things way harder than they needed to be. You didn’t deserve any of it.”
Gaeul didn’t say anything right away, she just sat there watching you. Her silence made your chest ache even more, but somehow you pushed through it.
“I was insecure, and jealous, and honestly? Just scared,” you admitted.
“I was scared that Mingyu might look at you and realise that you’ve always been better than me. And instead of dealing with it like a normal person, I lashed out at you. That wasn’t fair. I let my insecurities get the better of me, and I hurt you in the process.”
You sighed. You felt tears building up in your eyes, but you kept them locked on hers this time. “I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, or even at all. I just…I couldn’t let things stay like this without at least apologising to your face. You deserve that much.”
Your palms were sweaty against your jeans, and your heart was beating like a drum. For the first time, you felt like you laid everything bare. There were no excuses, no defenses, just honesty. Now all you could do was wait for her response.
You were ready for her response, whatever it could be. She could laugh at your face or spit harsh words she had for you, you were ready to take it all in.
But you got nothing.
Instead, Gaeul leaned back in her chair and let out a long breath like she’d been holding it in since you walked through the door. Her expression stayed unreadable as her eyes flicked down to the table and then back up to you.
“You know…” she finally started, calmly, though sounding tired at the same time.
“When you implied I was being a ‘homewrecker,’ I can’t even tell you how much that hurt. I was furious, hurt and embarrassed all at once. I wanted to snap back and prove you wrong to defend myself right there. But I didn’t, I just froze. It was one of those moments where you’re so shocked, you don’t even know what to say, you know?”
Your heart dropped to your stomach as her words sank in. Your bottom lip trembled and you lowered your head in shame. God, you felt awful. So damn awful. If the situation had been reversed, you knew you would’ve lashed out too. Anyone would, to protect their dignity. You couldn’t even blame her for being angry because it made perfect sense.
“But,” she continued, “I get where you’re coming from. I mean, I would feel weird too, considering the history Mingyu and I have. So I can’t really pretend that it doesn’t make things complicated sometimes.”
Gaeul’s tone then softened a little. “But Y/n, that doesn’t mean I’m trying to take him away from you. I moved on, and I have an amazing girlfriend who I love more than anything. Mingyu is your boyfriend now, and I respect that. I would never try to mess with what you two have” she said.
She paused to choose her next words carefully.
“You have to understand that Mingyu and I were good friends way before we ever dated. He’s been one of my friends for a long time, and that bond didn’t just vanish after we broke up. We don’t love each other in that way anymore, but we still care about each other. We still laugh, we still tease, we still share that old comfort. That’s just the kind of friendship we have. And I need you to know, that’s all it is now, friendship. Nothing more.”
It had been pretty obvious to everyone, well, at least to their close friends, that Gaeul was into women by the time she and Mingyu broke up. Still, when it first came out, it threw everyone for a loop. Nobody saw it coming, because Gaeul had always dated guys, and she and Mingyu seemed solid for a long time. So when she finally told them, there were definitely a few dropped jaws and awkward silences.
Perhaps it was the fact that she hid it all so well in fear of being judged, or at least, to figure out her sexuality.
But over time, it started to make sense. The way she talked about love and the way she carried herself, it all just fell into place. She seemed lighter and more like herself than she’d ever been when she was with Mingyu. And her friends noticed that too. The same girl who used to second-guess everything was suddenly glowing, laughing more and completely at ease in her own skin.
So, what started out as a shock quickly turned into one of those “ah, okay, that actually makes perfect sense now” moments.
The only person who hadn’t caught on, or maybe just didn’t want to, was you. Everyone else seemed to have accepted it ages ago, but you were stuck in your own head, replaying the same thought over and over, that Gaeul and Mingyu used to date.
That was it. That was the line your mind refused to cross. No matter how many times Mingyu reassured you, or how harmless Gaeul’s actions actually were, your insecurities kept twisting everything into something ugly.
And now, sitting there with everything laid bare right in front of you, it all hit you so hard. Gaeul wasn’t the problem, she never was. You were just too caught up in your own worries to see what was obvious to everyone else. You couldn’t help but feel incredibly stupid, and honestly, a little ashamed of how much you let your insecurities take over.
You couldn’t stop yourself as your hands flew up to cover your face, the tears finally breaking free. All the guilt, the embarrassment and the exhaustion from holding everything in just crashed at once. You felt miserable, really. You didn’t even know what to do with yourself anymore.
“I’m so, so sorry, Gaeul,” you said, voice trembling as you tried to steady your breathing. “I shouldn’t have shouted at you like that, especially in front of everyone.”
You forced yourself to uncover your face, even though your cheeks were still wet and your eyes bloodshot and puffy. You wanted her to see how much you meant it, and that it wasn’t just some quick apology to ease your conscience.
Gaeul could see right through you. She could see every bit of guilt, regret, and exhaustion written all over your face. There wasn’t a single trace of defensiveness left in you, just sincerity. And that alone was enough to soften her expression. She let out a quiet sigh, then gave you a small, almost tired smile.
She reached across the table and gently placed her hand over yours, and the simple gesture nearly made you tear up again.
“Hey,” she said gently, “it’s okay Y/n. I forgive you. I’m honestly glad you came to talk about it face-to-face instead of just texting. It means a lot. I hope we can move past it and maybe…be friends?”
You gave her a small nod as your lips curled into a faint, broken smile. It wasn’t much, but it was all you could manage without crying again. And you felt the tension in your chest loosen a little.
You didn’t really know what came next. Things between you and Gaeul weren’t magically fixed, and it would probably take some time before things felt normal again — if they ever really could. But for now, that didn’t matter.
What mattered was that she didn’t hate you. She didn’t resent you or hold that moment against you. She forgave you, genuinely and wholeheartedly.
Taking a quiet breath, you wiped the corner of your eye and looked at her with a bit more steadiness this time. “Thank you,” you whispered.
Gaeul smiled softly in return. “So…” she started, dragging the word out just a little as she leaned back against her chair.
“I’m guessing you and Mingyu got into an argument?”
You let out a soft, awkward laugh as you tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear. “Is it that obvious?” you asked, though you already knew it was.
She raised an eyebrow and gave a little snort. “Uh, yeah. Considering how pissed off Mingyu looked and how he basically dragged you out of the restaurant, I’d say it was pretty obvious. The whole table went dead silent after that.”
“Also, you looked absolutely shit the moment you walked in,” she added, jokingly.
You couldn’t help but laugh this time. “Wow, thanks,” you said sarcastically, using both palms to wipe at your still-wet and puffy eyes.
“God,” you muttered, shaking your head as another laugh slipped out.
After a brief pause, your smile began to fade, replaced by worry as last night replayed in your mind. “Hey..do you perhaps know where Mingyu is?” you asked, breaking the silence.
Her expression shifted immediately as her brows pulled together in concern. You took a shaky breath, “I haven’t heard from him since he left the house last night” you added.
Gaeul leaned back and frowned. “After dinner ended, we all went home. He came by my place to apologise for what happened, but I’m not sure where he went after that,” she said honestly.
“I just assumed he went back home.”
Your heart sank at her words. He didn’t come home. You struggled to breathe for a second as your mind raced through all the possibilities. Was he really that angry? Was he avoiding you?
Or worse, was he regretting everything?
Gaeul noticed your face pale and quickly leaned forward to hold your hands. “Hey,” she said softly, trying to pull you back to reality.
“He’s probably okay wherever he is. Maybe he just needs more time to cool off?” she reassured you with a small, hopeful smile.
You let out a tired sigh, resting your elbows on the table and rubbing your temples. “Yeah, that’s what he said before walking out,” you murmured.
“It’s just…it’s so hard right now,” you admitted.
“We’ve been arguing so much lately, way more than we should. And it’s gotten to a point where it doesn’t even feel healthy anymore. And after yesterday…” you swallowed hard, fighting the lump in your throat. “I’m scared I might’ve pushed him too far.”
Your voice cracked on the last word, and you quickly dropped your gaze to the table, hoping she wouldn’t see the tears already forming in your eyes.
“I don’t even know how to fix this anymore,” you whispered. “I just hope I don’t lose him. God, I’ll fall apart if I do.” A tear slipped down your cheek before you could stop it.
You didn’t mean to start crying again, but it just hurt. You were scared, because you didn’t know how you were going to reconcile with him. What if this time apart wasn’t just him cooling off? What if it was him realising he didn’t want to come back at all?
The idea alone made your stomach agitate. Losing Mingyu was more than just a nightmare, it felt like it would be the end of everything you both built together.
You pressed the heel of your hand to your eyes, trying to pull yourself together, but the ache in your chest stayed. All you could think about was how badly you wanted to rewind and do things differently, before it was too late.
“Hey, hey,” Gaeul cut in quickly.
“You’re not going to lose him, alright? Trust me, I know Mingyu. When that man loves someone, he loves hard. He’s stubborn about it too. He’d rather get hurt himself than let go of the person he cares about. That’s just who he is” she said.
You looked up at her with your glossy eyes, but her words slowly started to sink in.
Gaeul smiled softly. “He loves you so much, Y/n. Seriously. More than he ever loved me, and I say that with full confidence.”
She gave a small laugh, shaking her head like she still couldn’t believe it herself. “I’ve never seen him so gone over anyone before. You have no idea how obvious it is. Everyone sees it. He’s completely whipped for you.”
She leaned back in her chair. “So, please don’t start thinking the worst. I promise you, Mingyu’s not the type to walk away just because things get hard. If anything, he’ll fight even harder for you. That’s how much you mean to him.”
Your heart fluttered. And somehow, hearing that from her, the one person who used to know him best, made it all feel a little more real.
╴╴╴╴╴
12:25 p.m.
After saying goodbye to Gaeul, you let out a long breath you didn’t even realise you had been holding. It felt like a weight had finally been lifted off your chest. Though not completely gone, you felt lighter, like you could finally breathe again. Things between you and her had been tense for so long that just clearing the air felt like a small victory.
At least that part was over. At least she didn’t hate you. But then your thoughts drifted right back to Mingyu, the one thing was still weighing heavy in your heart.
You didn’t know what you were supposed to say to him when you finally saw him again. Would he even want to see you? Would he still be angry, or just done?
Though with Gaeul’s reassurance, you still felt a little uncertain.
But at the same time, you were determined. No matter how hard it would be, you were ready to do whatever it took to make things right.
So, after stopping by the supermarket and grabbing everything you needed for beef bulgogi and kimchi fried rice, you headed straight home with your arms full of shopping and your head full of nerves.
But when you stepped into the house, your heart immediately sank. Mingyu still wasn’t home. The place felt weirdly empty without him because you weren’t used to this kind of silence. Usually you would hear him humming from the kitchen as he cooked, yelling your name from the living room, or just rambling about whatever random thing popped into his head.
Normally, he would always greet you by the door and wrap you in a warm, tight hug. Then he’d press a soft kiss to your lips and say something stupidly sweet that would make you forget about the terrible days you’d had.
It felt weirdly gloomy without him around. The slice was almost unsettling, and you couldn’t shake off how strange it felt not to hear his voice, or any noise that indicated that he was home.
Still, you wanted to do something. Maybe cooking his favourite food as an apology would help. That was always your thing, after all. If you messed up, you’d make his go-to comfort meals, like beef bulgogi or kimchi fried rice. If he was in the wrong, he’d show up with your favourite soup or spicy stir fried noodles.
With the little hope you had left in you, you sighed. You didn’t even bother to change out of your outfit. You simply took your shoes and jacket off before dumping the bags on the counter and getting to work.
╴╴╴╴╴
03:10 p.m.
As much as you wanted to text Mingyu, you forced yourself not to. You told yourself over and over that he needed space, and you had to respect that. And for a while, you tried, you really did. But the longer the silence stretched, the more you started to feel suffocated. It was becoming unbearable to just sit there in the empty house without the sound of his presence.
The food, which you haven’t dished up yet, was still sitting on the stove, and it had long gone cold now. You hoped that Mingyu would walk through the door in time for lunch, but noon turned into afternoon, and there was still no sign of him.
Eventually, you couldn’t wait any longer, so you texted a few of his friends and asked if they had seen or heard from him. The replies came quickly, but none of them helped. None of them knew where he was.
You stared at your phone, and felt that familiar knot tighten in your throat. He wasn’t answering anyone, not even you, and that was what scared you most. You tried to tell yourself to relax, but it was getting hard to breathe in this silence.
Finally, you exhaled shakily and picked up your phone again. Enough waiting — you were going to call him directly.
After three rings, you were hit with the sound of the automated voice telling you the number you were trying to reach was unavailable. And just like that, whatever little bit of strength you had left completely snapped.
Your chest tightened so painfully, and it felt like the air was sucked right out of the room. That stupid robotic voice kept echoing in your head, and suddenly everything around you blurred. The knot in your throat grew until it felt like you couldn’t swallow, couldn’t speak, couldn’t even think straight.
Your breathing turned sharp and even, like you were gasping for air through a straw. Tears started welling up so fast that your vision went foggy, and you could barely see your phone screen anymore. You pressed a hand to your chest to try and calm yourself down, but your heartbeat was wild and erratic. It was like your body was stuck in fight-or-flight mode.
You wanted to cry, to scream, or do something to release the ache choking you, but you couldn’t. The sobs stayed trapped in your throat, and it was burning their way up but never escaping. Your whole body was trembling hard, uncontrollable shakes that made it impossible to even sit still.
Your fingers went numb, and your phone slipped from your grasp and fell onto the floor. You curled in on yourself and clutched your chest, desperately trying to breathe.
You were in the middle of a full-blown panic attack, and it was worse than any you ever had before.
Was this really the end? Was Gaeul wrong about everything she had told you? What if Mingyu had finally made up his mind? What if he was done with you for good? The thought alone sent you spiraling even more.
Your mind went completely blank afterwards, except for one thought, your mother.
“M-Mum,” you choked out with your trembling voice as your hands shakily reached for your phone.
Everything felt blurry, like you were underwater. Your fingers could barely move properly as you scrolled through your contacts. It took what felt like forever to find her name, while your legs were barely keeping you upright. When you finally pressed call, you could hear your heart pounding in your ears.
Your mother was your best friend. You told her everything, your highs, your lows, your plans and your stupid little worries. She was your safe place, and hearing her voice was all you needed right now.
So when she picked up and that warm, familiar voice greeted you with, “hey darling,” you just broke.
“M-Mum,” you managed to croak out between choked breaths.
Instantly, she picked up on it, and her calm tone turned into panic. “Y/n? Honey, what’s wrong? Talk to me, what happened?”
“H-He doesn’t w-want m-me anymore,” you stammered. “H-He d-doesn’t want t-to c-come b-back home M-Mum.”
Your voice cracked completely, breaking into sobs. You could hear her calling your name, trying to calm you down, but her words sounded so far away and muffled, like they were coming from another room.
“I-I can’t…b-breathe,” you gasped out, clutching your chest as your vision began to tunnel. The phone slipped slightly in your hand, and you heard your mother’s voice grow louder and panicked now as she yelled your name through the speaker.
But it was too late. Your knees buckled and the phone fell from your grip. The last thing you heard was your mother’s desperate shouting before everything faded to black.
╴╴╴╴╴
Meanwhile, Mingyu was sprawled out on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling of his old bedroom.
He didn’t really plan to end up at his parents’ house. After storming out and stopping by Gaeul’s place to apologise to her for what happened, he realised he had nowhere else to go. His parents’ place seemed like the safest option. It was more comforting and quiet where he could breathe for a bit.
The moment he walked through the door, though, his parents bombarded him with questions asking him what happened and why he looked so down. He didn’t have the energy to explain, so he brushed it off with a vague answer that you both fought and that he needed some time to cool off. It was enough to make them drop it, well, at least for the night.
But by the time the sun rose the next morning, his mother had clearly noticed his phone buzzing every few minutes on the nightstand. She was beginning to get annoyed at her son’s lack of attention. And hearing the constant vibration and seeing the unread notifications piling up on his phone, she smacked his chest, saying, “stop being childish Mingyu. If she’s calling this much, you should answer her.”
He didn’t respond though. He just stared at the screen lighting up again with your name. He knew you were trying to reach him, and he knew exactly how worried you must’ve been. But as much as it hurt to ignore you, he didn’t want to reply. He was still angry, yes, but more than that, he was exhausted, both emotionally and mentally.
So instead of replying, he switched his phone off completely and left it on the bedside table like it didn’t even exist. Out of sight and out of mind, at least, that’s what he tried to tell himself.
Mingyu knew he was being ridiculous at this point, but he couldn’t help it. It just felt like no one really got what was going on in his head, not even you. He loved you, god, he loved you so bad. He loved you so much it almost scared him sometimes.
No matter how insecure you got, he always tried to make sure you felt seen, safe, and loved. He would go out of his way just to remind you how much you meant to him, whether through small text messages, giving you forehead kisses, or staying up late at night to talk things through when you were overthinking again.
To put it simply, you were everything to him. His entire world.
And yet, it felt like you couldn’t see it. Like no matter how hard he tried to show you that there would never, ever be another woman he could love the way he loved you, it wasn’t enough. Every time there were misunderstandings, every argument that circled back to the same insecurities, it chipped away at him little by little.
He was tired. He wasn’t tired of you, rather, he was tired of the fighting. He was tired of the endless reassurance he’d give you, and the feeling that love alone wasn’t fixing things anymore.
And after what happened last night, when things went a little too far, it pushed him over the edge. It broke something inside him, and now as he laid staring at the ceiling, he wasn’t even sure how to start putting those pieces back together. He just didn’t know how else to prove to you.
Mingyu let out a long sigh and rolled onto his side, eyes drifting toward the window where the sunlight was spilling through the curtains. The sky was clear with not a single cloud in sight, and the breeze that slipped through the slightly open window carried that midday freshness. It was perfect beach weather.
And instantly, his mind went to you, because you loved this kind of day. You loved the sound of the waves, the feel of sand between your toes, the excuse to pack a basket full of snacks and just lie there for hours talking about nothing.
Mingyu could almost picture it, of you laughing as you laid your head against his bare chest. And walking hand in hand down the beach, admiring the sunset.
He would drive the four hours down to Busan without a second thought if it meant seeing that smile again. That was how much he loved you. Even now, when things between you were such a mess, that love was still sitting strong in his chest, refusing to fade.
It wasn’t long before Mingyu heard quick footsteps storming down the hallway, followed by his bedroom door bursting open.
“Kim Mingyu!”
He quickly rolled onto his other side at the sound of his mother’s sharp and panicked voice. She stood in the doorway with her phone in her hand. “Where in God’s name did you put your phone?” she snapped as she took a few quick steps towards him.
He blinked, caught off guard. “Why? What happened?” he asked.
His mother stopped beside the bed, taking a shaky breath before speaking. “I just got a call from Y/n’s mum,” she began. “She was looking for you, and said Y/n called her while having a panic attack. A really bad one.”
For a split second, everything froze. His heartbeat, his breathing, even his mind. And when the words finally hit him like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over his head, his heart started racing with dread.
“She— she what?” he almost stuttered as he shot upright, fumbling for his phone on the nightstand. His hands were getting clammy, shaking so badly he almost dropped it as he pressed the button to turn it on.
“Her mum said she was struggling to breathe,” his mother said in a worried tone. “The last thing she heard before the call was cut off was Y/n saying she couldn’t breathe.”
Mingyu’s stomach contorted agonisingly, but before he could even react, his mother went on to say something that made his whole world tilt.
“When she rushed over to your place, she found Y/n collapsed in the living room.”
His heart shot straight to his throat, eyes widening in alarm. “C–Collapsed?” he stammered, quickly standing up to his feet.
“What do you mean collapsed? Where is she now?!” his voice rose slightly in fear as he walked towards his mother.
“Yes Mingyu! Collapsed!” his mother snapped. “She’s at the hospital right now. Her mum said she wasn’t responding, and they’ve all been trying to reach you for the past thirty minutes! Why haven’t you been answering your phone?”
Mingyu barely heard the rest of what his mother was saying. Her voice, the ticking clock, even the sound of his own breathing, everything around him blurred into static. The air suddenly felt too thin to breath, and his chest felt like all the oxygen had been sucked out of his lungs.
He couldn’t think straight. His head was spinning, and his heartbeat was too loud in his ears.
“Hospital,” he mumbled, almost to himself,
And without wasting another second, he bolted out of his bedroom. Mingyu practically flew down the stairs. He nearly tripped trying to shove his feet into his shoes, and he didn’t even bother to tie the laces properly. His hands were shaking so badly that he fumbled with the keys on the counter before finally grabbing them.
“Mingyu!” his mother called after him, shouting the name of the hospital. He barely heard it over the rush of blood in his ears.
“I got it!” he yelled back, though his voice cracked halfway.
He yanked open the door, ran outside as fast as he could, and jumped into his car. Turning on the engine, he hurriedly reversed out of the driveway.
Mingyu knew better than anyone how dangerous, and stupid, it was to drive recklessly, no matter how desperate the situation was. You’d drilled that into him numerous times.
Every time he’d grab his keys to leave, you’d give him that little reminder, “drive safe, okay? No speeding.”
It became your thing. And the irony was, you didn’t even have a driver’s licence, but you still lectured him like you were the highway authority itself.
And Mingyu, being the confident driver he was, sometimes got a little too bold behind the wheel. He’d often take turns too fast or tailgate when he was late, and you would always call him out for it later with that disappointed look he hated seeing.
Even now, when all he wanted to do was slam his foot on the accelerator and break every speed limit in the book just to get to you faster, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. The thought of going against your words was enough to keep him in check.
Don’t speed Mingyu.
Still, it was torture. Every time he got caught at a red light, his hands tightened around the steering wheel til his knuckles turned white.
He couldn’t stop muttering curses under his breath while bouncing his leg anxiously. And when a car in front of him moved at the speed of a snail, he’d slam his hand on the honk button.
He was, really, trying so damn hard to stay calm.
By the time Mingyu finally pulled up to the hospital, he didn’t even care how he parked. The car was barely in the lines, maybe even sideways, but that didn’t matter to him. He just threw the door open, slammed it shut behind him, and sprinted straight through the sliding doors.
The receptionist was startled a little when he rushed up to the desk. But more so by his dishevelled appearance — hair messy, chest heaving and sweat beading down his temple. He looked completely frantic, like he ran a marathon.
“Jeon Y/N, where is she?” he asked, leaning forward on the counter, barely able to catch his breath.
The receptionist blinked at him. “I’m sorry, sir, but we can’t give out any information about patients unless you’re a family member,” she told him.
“She’s my girlfriend. Please, just tell me where I can find her” he pleaded, trying not to lose his cool.
Before the receptionist could speak up, Mingyu heard your mother’s voice call out his name from somewhere behind him. “Mingyu?”
His heart leaped at the sound, spinning around instantly. “Mrs Jeon!” he exclaimed in relief as he rushed toward her.
Mingyu reached your mother in seconds, almost stumbling to a stop in front of her. “Where is she? How is she? What happened?” he blurted out, voice breaking halfway through the sentence. His breathing was uneven as his eyes darted around the hallway like he was searching for you.
“Hey, slow down,” your mother said softly.
“The doctor said her body was under a lot of stress. The panic attack made it worse which caused her to faint. But she’s okay. They said she just needs a lot of rest” she explained.
Mingyu felt a lump form in his throat, and eyes sting with tears. “Is she awake right now? Or is she sleeping?” he asked.
Your mother’s expression softened, and let out a small sigh, “she’s awake, but she doesn’t really want to talk to anyone right now. She just keeps asking for you.”
It was like the final string that snapped. Mingyu’s bottom quivered as he fought to hold himself together. But involuntarily, a small whimper escaped from his lips.
“Which room is she in?” he whispered.
“Room twenty-six,” she said, pointing down the corridor.
But she didn’t even finish before Mingyu’s feet were already on the move. His shoes squeaked against the hospital floor as he ran, and he didn’t care about the people staring or the nurses telling him to slow down. All he could think about was getting to you, and seeing you with his own eyes.
When Mingyu finally reached your room, he stopped dead in his tracks right outside the door. His hand hovered over the handle, but he couldn’t bring himself to push it open just yet. His heart was pounding, so hard it felt like it might burst out of his chest.
All that adrenaline that had carried him here suddenly turned into nerves. He was so desperate to see you, but now that he was here, he didn’t know what to do.
He swallowed hard, running a shaky hand through his hair as he stared at the small window on the door. Through it, he could see you sitting on the bed with your knees pulled up to your chest and your face buried in your arms.
The thin hospital blanket was draped around you, but you still looked so small, so fragile. The lump in Mingyu’s throat began to suffocate him. His hand reached up to clutch his chest, trying to steady the rapid thump of his heart.
His vision blurred as he tried to fight back the tears threatening to spill. Then, he let out a shaky exhale, “God, what have I done?” he whispered to himself, You looked completely broken, and knowing he was part of the reason you ended up like this made him want to tear himself apart.
Mingyu dragged in a shaky breath, roughly wiping his eyes before finally pushing the door open.
The sudden sound made you flinch, but the second your eyes landed on the man you had been dying to see, your whole body seemed to let go of the tension it had been holding.
“Mingyu…” you breathed out with a trembling voice as you threw the blanket aside and got to your feet.
The sight of your red and puffy eyes completely broke him.
Whatever strength he had left just shattered right there. A strangled sob tore out of his chest as he rushed to you, closing the distance in seconds before wrapping you up in his arms in a tight, desperate hug.
You melted into him immediately, and your hands gripped at the back of his shirt. “Where were you?” you choked out as you buried your face against him. “I thought you left me.”
“I thought you weren’t coming back,” you continued, your sobs growing harder. “I was so scared.”
“I’m sorry Mingyu. I’m so, so sorry. I never wanted to make things harder for you. I didn’t mean to make you feel like you had to prove anything to me. I just—” you broke off, gasping through another wave of tears.
“Please don’t leave me. I’ll do better. I’ll be better.”
“Hey, hey, hey—” he stammered as he pulled back to cup your face in his large, shaking hands. His thumbs brushed over your damp cheeks, and his heart shattered with every sob that left your lips.
“Look at me baby” he said.
When your eyes flicked up, that was all it took for his composure to crumble all over again. “Shh, calm down baby. It’s okay,” he reassured you, almost desperately.
“I’m right here, okay? I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to leave you, I swear” he said, blinking back his own tears.
You tried to say something, but the words dissolved into another sob, and that broke him to the core. “Fuck,” he choked, shaking his head.
“Fuck, I didn’t mean for things to go this far. I didn’t mean to hurt you like this. I’m so fucking sorry my love.”
He leaned forward until his forehead pressed against yours, eyes shut tight as he breathed you in.
“God, I’m so fucking stupid,” he croaked as he leaned in and pressed a shaky kiss to your lips.
When he pulled back, his forehead stayed pressed against yours, and you could feel his hot and uneven breath fan over your lips. “But I’m here now,” he whispered.
“I’m right here with you baby girl. I’m not going anywhere again, I swear. I’m never leaving you.”
He kissed you again, slower and longer this time, and you could practically feel him trembling against you. “I’m so sorry” he whimpered against your lips.
“I’m so sorry I left you like that, baby. I shouldn’t have walked away at all. I shouldn’t have ignored you. God, I hate myself for it.” His tears mixed with yours, tasting the salty warmth spreading between your lips as he kissed you again and again.
“Hey,” you whispered softly, voice still hoarse from crying.
“At least you’re here now,” you said softly, giving him a small, tired smile as you reached up to brush the messy strands of hair away from his eyes. “That’s all that matters.”
Mingyu let out a low hum, almost like a sigh of relief, before he cupped your cheek and pulled you in for another long, deep kiss.
When he finally pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours once again. His eyes were still glassy, but they were much calmer now.
“I love you baby,” he said as his thumb traced lazy circles against your jaw.
“Always remember that, okay? No matter how angry I get, no matter how bad we fight, that anger’s never going to be stronger than how much I love you. Ever.”
You blinked at him, your heart squeezing at his words. You saw him swallow hard, “I love you too much to ever let you go. You have no idea how much it scares me at the thought of not having you around. I swear, I’d rather take all the pain in the world than ever lose you.”
His words hit so deep that your eyes started welling up with tears all over again. You didn’t have to doubt that he meant every one of them. The sincerity in his eyes, the way he kissed you and held you, it gave you the security you desperately needed at this moment.
You smiled through your tears, “I know” you responded. “I know you do. And I love you too.”
Mingyu cracked a small smile and leaned in again, kissing the corner of your lips gently before enveloping you into a hug.
“We’ll be okay.”
╴╴╴╴╴
10:20 p.m.
After you got discharged, Mingyu drove straight home, one hand on the wheel and the other holding yours the entire way. He was quieter than usual, but the way his thumb kept brushing over your knuckles said enough.
Not long after you got settled in, his mother dropped by with a pot of warm rice porridge. Of course, a few minutes later, Mingyu was the one with the bowl in his hands, devouring it like he hadn’t eaten in days.
You just sat there and watched him shovel spoon after spoon into his mouth. “You do realise that was supposed to be my porridge, right?” you tried not to laugh.
Mingyu glanced up, a bit of rice stuck to his lip, and gave you a sheepish grin. “You love me too much to stop me.”
You rolled your eyes but didn’t argue. He did love that porridge way too much, and honestly, you weren’t even that hungry anymore. Just the sight of him looking so happy enjoying it made your heart feel full.
After that, the two of you hopped into the shower together, mostly because Mingyu didn’t trust you to stand for too long on your own. You complained, but you didn’t really mean it. The way he was so gentle when washing the shampoo out of your hair and kissing your temple every few minutes, it made your chest ache in the best way possible.
Dinner was whatever leftovers you had cooked in the afternoon. And then, predictably, you both migrated to the sofa. Mingyu grabbed the thickest blanket he could find and wrapped the two of you up like a burrito before putting on a random rom-com movie.
Now, halfway through your second film, your eyelids were starting to grow heavy. The rhythmic movement of Mingyu’s fingers tracing soft circles over your bare stomach wasn’t helping at all.
You tried to fight the sleep, whether it was by blinking hard, shifting your position, or even pretending to be interested in the plot. But his warm and his quiet breathing beside your ear, and that comforting hand on your bare belly were all working against you.
Mingyu noticed, of course. He glanced down at you with a small grin. “You can sleep, you know” he told you.
“I’m fine,” you mumbled, eyes already half-shut.
He chuckled softly, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Sure you are,” he responded, still drawing lazy patterns on your skin.
You stayed quiet for a while, eyes still closed, somewhere between awake and asleep.
“I talked to Gaeul today,” you mumbled sleepily, breaking the silence.
Mingyu blinked and took his eyes off the television, glancing down at you. If he was surprised, he made sure to make it seem less obvious. “Yeah?” he asked softly.
“Mhm,” you hummed, finally blinking your eyes open to look up at him. “We met at this little cafe and just…talked it out. I apologised to her for last night and everything, really” you said.
“After learning everything, I just felt incredibly stupid for everything I’ve said to her. I felt so crap” you continued, shifting a little to adjust yourself in his arms.
“So I messaged her to meet me at a cafe. And honestly? I didn’t know what kind of reaction to expect, but I just wanted to put it out there and let her know how sorry I was.”
Mingyu tilted his head slightly, “and how did that go?” he asked as his fingers brushed through your hair. Though he could already guess how it went, he wanted to hear it from you.
“Better than I thought it would, honestly. I cried a lot, and God it was so embarrassing now that I think back to it. I was such a mess” you gave a small laugh, shaking your head at yourself.
“But she was really kind about it. She said she appreciated me reaching out and talking to her in person. She said it meant a lot” your voice softened a little.
“Most importantly, she forgave me” you added.
Mingyu’s expression melted into one of quiet pride. “That’s good,” he said, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone. “I’m proud of you baby.”
You let out another soft laugh, almost sleepy. “I just felt so stupid, you know? The things I said to her were just…ugh!” you groaned and buried your face against his chest again.
“I don’t even know what came over me.”
Your body relaxed again, and you let out an airy hum as Mingyu’s fingers continued to move through your hair. “I’m glad I talked to her though,” you whispered, half-drifting back into sleep.
“I am too,” Mingyu said quietly, resting his chin on your head. “Means you can finally stop carrying everything around like a burden.”
You hummed in agreement, your words slurring slightly as you mumbled, “maybe now I can actually sleep without crying.”
You felt Mingyu’s chest vibrating under your cheek as he let out a small laugh. “Good,” he whispered, holding you a little tighter. “You deserve that.”
You could feel sleep creeping up on you again, and your eyelids grew heavier and heavier with every lazy stroke of Mingyu’s hand on your back. You didn’t bother fighting it this time, and just let yourself sink into his warmth.
“I love you, Kim Mingyu,” your words slurred together as sleep started to win.
Then, in a voice so soft it almost broke his heart, you whispered, “please don’t ever leave me.”
The room fell quiet after that, and Mingyu’s smile faltered just a little. It wasn’t the first time you said something like that half-asleep, especially when you two made up after an argument, but it still hit him the same every time. He hated that there was even a part of you that worried he’d go anywhere.
Your body grew heavier in his arms as you finally drifted off completely. Mingyu adjusted his position and sat up a little straighter so you could rest more comfortably against him. He tugged the blanket higher and tucked it snugly around your shoulders, before wrapping both arms securely around you.
He looked down at your sleeping face, your lashes resting softly against your cheeks, lips slightly parted, breathing slow and steady. His chest ached in the best and worst way.
Leaning down, he pressed a long, gentle kiss to your forehead. “I love you too princess,” he murmured against your skin. “And I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”
You didn’t stir. You were already deep in sleep with your small breaths fanning over his chest. Mingyu smiled faintly as he brushed a thumb over your cheek.
“I don’t even wanna think about what I’d do without you” he said, almost to himself.
a/n; sorry it took so long! my iPad broke and I needed a way to edit the fonts. and also sorry if you commented on my post to join the tag-list and aren’t listed on here, for some reason I can’t find your username under the @ search.
