conman.

ind. multifandom oc || written by benji

[conart]

                     THERE’S A PRINCIPLE OF BUSINESS                                  (PRINCIPLE OF BUSINESS) 

                      THAT EVERYBODY KNOWS IS SOUND

                  IT SAYS THE PEOPLE WITH THE MONEY                                 (PEOPLE WITH THE MONEY)

              MAKE THE EVER LOVING WORLD GO ROUND

                                                    --- 

ind. multifandom oc || written by benji

bio | rules

[ahsterism-aa]

@conart​ / robin & will starter call.

   LEANING ACROSS THE FAMILY VIDEO COUNTERTOP, her eyes seem to glint as they meet Snow’s— the sane, respectable answer to the request would probably be ‘what in the world do you think you’re doing, do you WANT me to get fired or something?’ but after organizing tapes and renting out movies for especially annoying customers today, Robin can’t say she ISN’T in the mood for some good old mischief.

         Besides, there’s no reason for anyone to know she may or may not have encouraged the idea, right? It’s not like the cameras have audio, there’s no one to question her claim of innocence with sufficient proof!

   “Because I am a RESPONSIBLE employee with absolutely no tolerance for any kind of messing with the lovely business I work for, I will hereby… look away while you switch out movies to different cases.” A smile, and her voice lowers to a whisper. “Go nuts— I’m in desperate need for a break from this shift’s ridiculous levels of monotony right now.” 

[conart]

Nice!  

Whether Snow would have stopped if Robin wanted her to is anyone’s guess.  As bored as she is, money is money, and who is she to get a steady stream of it taken away from a fellow girlboss.  Honest pay for honest work.  Uh.  Or something.  

Then again.  Gainful, honest employment is not necessarily the only way to make stacks on stacks on stacks.  So who knows.

“Great!  Do you think this one is too far.”

Snow makes no attempts to hide her actions, waving the currently naked VHS around with one hand and proudly displaying the wrong case in the other.  The VHS is Alien.  It’s going into the case for The Fox and the Hound. 

“I figure...this is kind of the same story.  Unlikely friends.  Fated enemies based on species alone.  It’s about overcoming odds!  Or something.  I think the customers will be satisfied with their rental experience.” 

She makes a show of snapping the VHS into place, biting her lip and making a suggestive grunt as the two holders go through the holes.  

“...I guess the next question is...where does The Shining go...”

[conart]

you think we can get them to release morbius one more time

[conart]

anyway.       snows relationship with akutagawa @canidcoat is this

[canidcoat]

“explanation.  now.”

he holds up his phone.  there is a quote retweet on his twitter post.  it reads:

L + ratio + into catboys + poor + gay + search history lookin like “catboy x dogboy candlelight lovemaking compilation” + mall goth  headass + no eyebrows + ugly + 0 pounds 0 ounces + magical clothes + allergic to eggs + tuberculosis arthur morgan headass + no bitches and no hoes

[conart]

alright son let me take a crack at it

L is fortnite for loss ( fortnite is call of duty for roblox enthusiasts ) ratio means you got owned on twitter, usually by loona fans if you know what that means into catboys references your crush on that tiger boy poor is obvious if no longer relevant gay is more obvious your search history references what you are looking up on porn hub assuming you know what that is. 

[BREATHES]

mall goths hang around wetzels pretzels and glare at you when you go in spencers if you aren’t goth enough no eyebrows is somehow more obvious than the gay thing 0 pounds 0 ounces is in reference to your...voluptuously challenged nature.  magical clothes is probably about rashoumon UNLESS you have lucky underwear that you haven’t told us about.  I don’t know if you’re allergic to eggs for real but there’s enough wrong with you, my brother in christ, that I would be surprised if your amazing monocolor dreamcoat isn’t epipen trained.  

[BREATHES HARDER]

tuberculosis killed arthur morgan from red dead redemption 2 which is a video game where your horses meat shrinks when it’s cold and finally, no bitches and no hoes is probably about how you look wistfully off in the distance when atsushi is like tying his shoes because he stopped looking at you for 15 seconds.  see also “down bad” and “in the trenches” 

[conart]

we are all camgirls in kaiba’s surveillance state