I'M A PHYSICIST,

not a biologist.

[conngenic]

personals DO NOT INTERACT ( rp sideblogs are the exception ) independent / private / selective recommended 16+

Curtis “Curt” Connors, as seen in Spider-Man 2 (2004) and Spider-Man 3 (2007) Heavily featuring influences from 616, the novelization, and headcanons Studied by Kriss ( he/him, 18+ ) / GMT+8 / college student

↝ A STUDY IN: mentorship, misunderstanding, and retrieving something lost.  Asclepius, god of healing, truth, and prophecy.

↝ CONTENT WARNINGS: includes untagged and recurring mentions of reptiles, war, violence, alcohol consumption (light), internalized ableism, death, and loss of limb. Highly advised not to follow if any mentions of the topics put you off.

↝ STATUS: mid-high activity, runs mostly on queue

↝ HEADCANONS: still WIPs ! ( those marked with ✧ are highly important and best read prior to interaction ) [ ✧ the lizard ] / [ mental health ] [ war ] / [ ✧ internalized ableism ] [ ] / [ ]

[ rules ] / [ dossier ] / [ promo ] [ permanent starter call ] / [ meme tag ]

↝ SEE ALSO: [ otto “doc ock” octavius /  ©herodrowned​ ]

[conngenic]

[[ just got back from a trip so i’ll be doing stuff but right after that i’ll queue some stuff i owe !! i’m in a bit of a c.yberpunk 2077 brainrot era ( see: ©cityburns ) but i promise i’ve not abandoned my lizard ]]

[osgoblins-a]

no more darker half, did you really think i’d let that happen ? that i’d let you take away my power because you are blind to what true power is ? i saw how she trapped you, fighting her holy moral mission, we don’t need you to save us, we don’t need to be fixed !  these are not curses, they’re gifts.  i watched you from deep behind norman’s cowardly eyes, struggling to have everything you want, while the world tries to make you choose. gods don’t have to choose. we take.

ind, selective  𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘴𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 / 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘨𝘰𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯 ,  earth-96283 / sam rai.mi trilogy based, heavily headcanon expanded. exploring themes such as : insanity in brilliance , the enemy within , godly wrath , the greed of man , monsterous becomings , corruption of the mind , loss of self . corrupted by jayne bird  ( 22 , she/they , cst ) 

[memesomething]

Noticing Trauma sentence starters

Feel free to alter dialogue to suit your muse!

“That really spooked you.” 

“I don’t want to pry, but.. I want you to know I also want to listen, if you want someone to talk to.” 

“Well, pretend I’m not here. What would you say if nobody could hear it?” 

“Does this happen a lot?” 

“Hey, what happened between you two?” 

“When is the last time you ate?”

“Is this okay?” 

“Hey.” 

“This is the third meal you’ve missed this week, are you okay?” 

“[Name]?” 

“What did he/she/they do?” 

“This … hurts you.” 

“You don’t feel safe, here.” 

“When you look at [trigger], you… what is that?” 

“What can I do?” 

“You were crying in your sleep.” 

“What do you dream about?” 

“Whenever you get stressed, you do this thing with your hands. What is it?” 

“You’re right, I don’t understand, yet. Will you help me?” 

“Should I leave a light on for you?” 

“I brought you some water.” 

“I won’t judge you.” 

“It doesn’t have anything to do with trust. You don’t have to tell me. But I’ll listen, if you do.” 

“Count your breaths with me, okay? Ready? One, two, three, four…” 

“I’m here.” 

“Talk to me.” 

“You don’t need to tell me everything. I just want to know how I can help.” 

“Let me hold your hair back, at least.” 

“You used to love that [item].” 

[moonpiehelps]

𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒

a collection of sentence starters from some encanto songs. Feel free to adjust as needed ! ♡

❛ This is our home. ❜ ❛ This is my family. ❜ ❛ So many stars and everybody gets to shine. ❜ ❛ There’s just a lot you’ve simply got to know. ❜ ❛ Oh my gosh, it’s them! ❜ ❛ But I don’t know who is who! ❜  ❛ Alright, alright, relax. ❜ ❛ It is physically impossible to relax! ❜ ❛ Tell us everything, what are your powers? ❜ ❛ And that’s why coffee’s for grown-ups. ❜ ❛ We don’t talk about [name]! ❜ ❛ They say he saw the future, one day he disappeared. ❜ ❛ Her recipes are remedies for real. ❜ ❛ If you’re impressed, imagine how I feel! ❜ ❛ Hey, coming through! ❜ ❛ I know it sounds a bit fantastical and magical. ❜ ❛ Let’s go, let’s go! ❜ ❛ We swear to always help those around us. ❜ ❛ How do you keep them all straight? ❜ ❛ She’s a perfect golden child. ❜ ❛ The beauty and the brawn do no wrong. ❜ ❛ But what’s your gift? ❜ ❛ I never meant this to get autobiographical. ❜ ❛ You can marry my sister if you wanna, but between you and me, she’s kind of a prima donna. ❜ ❛ Yo, I’ve said too much and thank you but I really gotta go! ❜ ❛ My family’s amazing! ❜ ❛ Don’t be upset or mad at all… ❜ ❛ Don’t feel regret or sad at all… ❜ ❛ And I’m fine, I am totally fine. ❜ ❛ I will stand on the side as you shine. ❜ ❛ I’m not fine, I’m not fine! ❜ ❛ I can’t take another night up in my room. ❜ ❛ Can’t keep down the unspoken invisible pain. ❜ ❛ Always walking alone. ❜ ❛ Always wanting for more. ❜ ❛ All I need is a change! ❜ ❛ All I need is a chance! ❜ ❛ Open your eyes, open your eyes! ❜ ❛ Someone please just let me know, where do I go? ❜ ❛ I am waiting on a miracle. ❜ ❛ So what can I do? ❜ ❛ I’m sick of waiting on a miracle. ❜ ❛ I’m the strong one, I’m not nervous. ❜ ❛ I glow ‘cause I know what my worth is. ❜ ❛ I don’t ask how hard the work is. ❜ ❛ I feel berserk as a tightrope walker in a three-ring circus! ❜ ❛ Was Hercules ever like “Yo, I don’t wanna fight Cerberus”? ❜ ❛ I’m pretty sure I’m worthless if I can’t be of service. ❜ ❛ Give it to your [sibling], your [sibling] older. ❜ ❛ Give her all the heavy things we can’t shoulder. ❜ ❛ Who am I if I can’t run with the ball? ❜ ❛ Who am I if I can’t carry it all? ❜ ❛ I hide my nerves, and it worsens. ❜ ❛ I worry something is gonna hurt us. ❜ ❛ Can I somehow preserve this? ❜ ❛ You try to stop it tumbling, but on and on it goes. ❜ ❛ If I could shake the crushing weight of expectations would that free some room up for joy or relaxation, or simple pleasure? ❜ ❛ 'Cause all we know is pressure. ❜ ❛ Give it to your [sibling], it doesn’t hurt. ❜ ❛ See if she can handle every family burden. ❜ ❛ Watch as she buckles and bends but never breaks! ❜ ❛ Never wonder if the same pressure would’ve pulled you under. ❜ ❛ Who am I if I don’t have what it takes? ❜ ❛ It was my wedding day. ❜ ❛ It was our wedding day. ❜ ❛ You telling this story, or am I? ❜ ❛ I’m sorry, mi vida, go on. ❜ ❛ Why did he tell us? ❜ ❛ What a joyous day… but anyway. ❜ ❛ I could always hear him sort of muttering and mumbling. ❜ ❛ It’s a heavy lift, with a gift so humbling. ❜ ❛ Grappling with prophecies they couldn’t understand. ❜ ❛ Do you understand? ❜ ❛ A seven-foot frame, rats along his back! ❜ ❛ When he calls your name, it all fades to black! ❜ ❛ Yeah, he sees your dreams. ❜ ❛ He told me my fish would die, the next day: dead! ❜ ❛ He said that all my hair would disappear. ❜ ❛ Your fate is sealed when your prophecy is read! ❜ ❛ It’s like I hear him now. ❜ ❛ I want not a sound out of you. ❜ ❛ Yeah, about that [name]… ❜ ❛ I really need to know about [name]… ❜ ❛ [name], your boyfriend’s here! ❜ ❛ Time for dinner! ❜ ❛ Why did I talk about [name]? ❜ ❛ Not a word about [name]. ❜ ❛ I never should’ve brought up [name]! ❜ ❛ I just made something unexpected. ❜ ❛ It’s not symmetrical or perfect, but it’s beautiful and it’s mine! ❜ ❛ What else can I do? ❜ ❛ Free hugs, bring it in! ❜ ❛ So much hides behind my smile. ❜ ❛ Do you know where you’re going? Whoa! ❜ ❛ What could I do if I just knew it didn’t need to be perfect? ❜ ❛ Careful, it’s carnivorous. ❜ ❛ I wanna feel the shiver of something new. ❜ ❛ I’m so sick of pretty, I want something true, don’t you? ❜ ❛ You just seem like your life’s been a dream. ❜ ❛ But it’s awesome to see how you rise. ❜ ❛ What can you do when you are deeply, madly, truly in the moment? ❜ ❛ Seize the moment, keep goin’. ❜ ❛ What can you do when you know who you wanna be is imperfect? ❜ ❛ But I’ll still be okay. ❜ ❛ The way is clearer 'cause you’re here, and well I owe this all to you. ❜ ❛ Show 'em what you can do. ❜ ❛ There’s nothing you can’t do. ❜

[conngenic]

✧ 𝙾𝚝𝚝𝚘 𝙾𝚌𝚝𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚞𝚜.·

furrowed   brow﹐     the   act   alone   of   closing   the   notebook   is   hardly   what   struck   octavius   as     strange﹐     it   was   the   abrupt   urgency.     as   though   curt   were   suddenly   possessed﹐     hellbent   on   concealing   each   page   from   every   curious   gaze   but   his   very   own﹐     a   thought   that   did   not   entertain   otto   so   much   as   it   imbued   the   once   seemingly     ordinary     item   with   an   air   of   immeasurable   mystique.          ‘‘‘‘     𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎   𝚊𝚛𝚎   𝚗𝚘   𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚜   𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝   𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎   𝚍𝚘𝚎𝚜   𝚗𝚘𝚝   𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚊𝚕.     ’’’’         he   smiled﹐     to   himself   as   much   as   to   curt﹐     though   his   gaze﹐     both   overtired   and   intense﹐     remained   fixed   on   the   notebook.          ‘‘‘‘     ah﹐     i     forgot     who   said   that﹐     i’m   afraid.     ’’’’          he   spoke﹐     slowly﹐     allowing   each   word   of   his   to   marinade   in   brief   silence   before   taking   a   deep   breath   in   through   his   nose.     both   of   his   eyes   once   again   greeting   curt   with   a   dull   warmth﹐     like   the   embers   of   a   dying   fire﹐     in   spite   of   how   his   innocent   confession  stung   just   a   little   against   his   pride.          ‘‘‘‘     i’m   sorry   to   disappoint   you﹐     𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚘𝚛   𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚘𝚛𝚜.     but   i   think   it’s   a   little     late     for   any   ordinary   student.     in   spite   of   all   your   hope.     ’’’’          octavius   shoved   his   hands   deep   in   his   pockets﹐     abandoning   all   thought   of   the   strange   notebook   or   even   his   own   pride﹐     otto   now﹐     not   without   a   small   wince﹐     leaned   ever   so   slightly   on   the   desk.          ‘‘‘‘     if   you   ever   require   help   with   anything﹐     curtis﹐     you   know   i’m   more   than   happy   to   oblige.     𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎   𝚒𝚜   𝚗𝚘   𝚜𝚎𝚗𝚜𝚎   𝚒𝚗   𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐   𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏.     ’’’’

Maybe  at  a  later  date,  Curt  would  reveal  the  contents  of  the  notebook.  What  would  a  𝚗𝚞𝚌𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚛  𝚙𝚑𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚜𝚝  make  out  of  scribblings  by  someone  who  hadn’t  studied  so  much  as  𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗  𝚋𝚒𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚢  intending  to  enhance  the  human  body?  He  doesn’t  hide  the  notebook,  knows  it  would  only  bring  more  attention  if  he  stuck  it  in  a  drawer  or  on  a  shelf  at  the  moment,  but  he  feels  somewhat  protective  of  it.  Thankfully,  Otto’s  prying  eyes  end  at  the  quote-  one  that  Curt  lets  out  a  laugh  at.  

“I’m  not  𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐,  Otto,“  he  genuinely  believes,  although  he  sees  it  as  an  irony  that  it’s  𝙾𝚝𝚝𝚘  of  all  people  offering  such  a  sentiment.  He’s  only  got  one  hand;  he  couldn’t  count  the  amount  of  times  on  his  fingers  that  he’s  had  to  drag  him  away  from  his  work.  Though,  in  Otto’s  defense,  one  of  them  is  a  physics  professor  and  the  other  is  changing  the  world  in  other  ways.  “Just  some  side-project  I’ve  been  considering.”  His  smile  stretches  at  that,  avoiding  eye  contact;  𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎-𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝  is  a  mild  descriptor.

“Is  that  all  you  came  to  my  office  to  do?  Get  your  nose  into  whatever  latest  research  that  I  am?”  Despite  the  half-rhetorical,  Curt  tilts  his  head  and  raises  a  brow  with  a  level  of  amusement  and  curiosity.  

[conngenic]

⭐ 𝙾𝚝𝚝𝚘 𝙾𝚌𝚝𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚞𝚜.·

“Christ, Connors.” He muttered softly, “I never get a chance to get a look at the news these days, but– an 8-foot lizard man? And you can’t even remember what happens once you pass that threshold?” The thought alone almost makes Otto worry if he’ll get any sleep tonight. He felt an urge to keep an eye on his friend instead of resting…

Far from prying eyes inside the old building, he was finally able to take off that dusty hat and heavy coat, his actuators stretching out and chirping, finally free after hours of staying hidden. “I suppose it would be best if we scrounge up some blankets in the meantime, you look like you’re getting cold.” Doc handed the coat to his actuators and they draped it over Curt’s shoulders– It was still fairly warm…

Maybe  he'd  have  laughed  any  other  time,  the  surprise  in  Otto's  tone.  But  the  time  𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚔,  𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚔,  𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚔𝚜  and  Curt  doesn't  know  how  long  left  until  the  creature  reappears.  A  cool  breeze  brushes  through  the  drafty  building,  Curt's  eyes  shutting  closed  for  a  few  seconds  to  grip  torn  cloth  tighter  to  bare  skin,  although  Octavius  hands  his  coat  over  him  and  whatever  warmth  is  left  in  it  is  greatly  appreciated.  Humans  were  not  intended  to  be  cold-blooded  creatures;  Curt  would  testify  greatly  to  that  fact.  "It's...  It's  something  that  happens  to  me  sometimes."  He  attempts  to  brush  it  off,  for  Otto's  sake.  "We  have  an  hour...  or  maybe  two."

While  the  creature  lays  dorman  in  his  subconscious,  Curt  sticks  close  to  Otto,  although  he's  wary  about  the  extra  appendages.  He  swallows  something  thick  in  his  throat,  wide  eyed  and  afraid,  acutely  aware  of  any  other  changes  to  himself  he  may  be  able  to  observe  before  they're  too  late.  "I've  been  trying  to  make  a  cure  for  this  for  weeks.  Nothing's  working.  Do  you  think...  do  you  think,  maybe,  you  could  help  me  with  that?"

[conngenic]

[[ heading out for dinner because my flatmate is back and when I return you will get a whole load of j.ohn w.ick content and it will all be @osgoblins fault ]]

[conngenic]

[[ so ... go look at @jwicks​ or perish i guess :/ ]]

[conngenic]

[[ heading out for dinner because my flatmate is back and when I return you will get a whole load of j.ohn w.ick content and it will all be @osgoblins fault ]]

[conngenic]

⭐ 𝙾𝚝𝚝𝚘 𝙾𝚌𝚝𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚞𝚜.

"Don’t worry about it,” he glanced back with a half-cocked smile, “Whether you were there or not couldn’t have changed the outcome as much as I’m sure you wish it could have. I’d still be like this and… Rosie…” Otto realized at that moment, he never truly got time to mourn the death of his beloved wife, but now wasn’t the time for it.

He shook his head, the actuators lowering him to the ground as they’d reached an old abandoned building. They then grabbed onto the wood panels covering the door and pried them off effortlessly. “Do you expect any further mutation from your experiment or does this only affect your arm?”

Octavius wasn’t sure what could happen, but it would be good to know the possibilities should he have to do anything drastic. Curt very clearly trusted him in return to not only keep him safe but hidden as well, even in his sleep-deprived state.

Curt  lets  a  𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚢  𝚜𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎  hang  over  them;  Martha  is  still  alive  and  well,  but  he  hasn't  seen  her  for  weeks,  Billy  much  less.  The  former  professor  looks  away,  towards  the  ground  into  a  vast  nothing,  the  sound  of  the  wood  being  being  pried  aside  bringing  him  back  to  the  reality  they  had  to  face  now.  His  blood  now  running  a  different  temperature,  Curt  curls  his  one  good  arm  around  himself,  grabbing  hold  of  torn  fabric  in  attempt  to  trap  whatever  body  heat  was  left.  His  body  is  nothing  but  a  𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐  𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎  𝚋𝚘𝚖𝚋  now.

"You  avoid  the  news  too,  now,  do  you?"  He  can  laugh  at  something,  at  least,  even  if  just  weakly.  Curt's  smile  quickly  falters  as  he  follows  Otto  into  the  building.  It's  far  from  ideal  but,  then  again,  it's  better  than  what  he'd  initially  planned  for  (  which  was  to  hide  out  in  the  sewers  ).  "This...  arm,  if  you  can  even  call  it  that,  isn't  all.  Every  now  and  then,  I  become..."  It's  hard  to  describe,  clear  in  the  way  Curt  gesticulates  with  the  regrowing  arm  beside  himself.  "An  eight-or-so  foot  𝚕𝚒𝚣𝚊𝚛𝚍  𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎.  I  never  remember  when  it  happens-  that's  the  scariest  part,  I  think."

[conngenic]

[[ hope you guys know that every time i read a swear word in a thread the sound of the n.ot f.or b.roadcast censorship button lighting up is played in my brain EVERY TIME without fail ]]

[conngenic]

⭐ 𝙰𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝙺𝚘𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚜𝚔𝚒.

‘ you’re not going t- ’ there is a hidden edge of panic to her voice. ‘ oh, you’re not going to call my dad. cool, cool. thank you, sir. ’ there’s fear in her eyes, + her breathing pattern changes. ‘ um, thanks. but don’t blame day, yeah. um. it won’t happen again, sir. ’

"I  don't  blame  them,"  he  says,  shaking  his  head  in  some  𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝  𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕.  He'd  cross  his  arms  if  he  could;  he  wouldn't  blame  his  child,  and  much  less  the  person  that  just  wanted  to  show  them  some  fun  for  the  pure  entertainment  of  it.  He'd  have  done  the  same,  after  all.  When  had  he  gotten  so  old?  "I  don't  even  blame  you,  either.  I'm  not  going  to  be  one  of  those  fathers  that  tells  on  his  kid's  friends  about  being  irresponsible  but...  it's  just  reckless.  But  you  promise  it  won't  happen  ever  again...  𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝?"

[conngenic]

⭐ 𝙾𝚝𝚝𝚘 𝙾𝚌𝚝𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚞𝚜.

Otto nods, understanding of Dr. Connors’s situation, the metallic arms lift him from the ground, “Luckily, I found a place to hide away for the evening. There should be enough space for both of us–” The actuators chirp at him and he rolled his eyes, shoving them away from his face, “Yes, there’ll be space for you too, relax… Now, follow me before Spiderman or the police find us.”

Two  𝚘𝚗𝚌𝚎  𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚝  scientific  minds,  reduced  to  monsters  by  their  own  doing.  Curt  stares  back  at  Otto,  shivering;  it's  about  to  come  back,  isn't  it?  Of  all  people  in  the  world,  Curtis  trusts  Otto  best  to  be  able  to  fend  himself  of  the  creature  when  it  does  appear-  maybe  in  an  hour  or  so,  if  lucky.  "Okay,"  he  says,  as  if  he  isn't  being  hunted  down  by  𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚕  𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚕.  Diligently,  he  follows  Otto,  closeby.  𝚂𝚙𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚛-𝙼𝚊𝚗  being  after  the  both  of  them  isn't  any  good-  Curt  just  wants  to  be  left  alone  until  he  can  fix  himself-  but  he  trusts  that  Otto  would  know  best  where  to  hide.  "I'm  sorry  I  wasn't  there,"  he  says,  almost  as  an  afterthought.  "At  the  demonstration,  I  mean.  I  wanted  to  be  but...  I  was  just  too  busy."

[conngenic]

⭐ 𝙳𝚊𝚢 𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚘𝚛𝚜-𝙳𝚞𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚝.

There was a quick inhale through their nose, and they fidgeted nervously. They usually don’t do stuff like this. It was the first time they did it. They didn’t think about what would happen if they got caught. It’s been a while since they got in trouble for something.

With the comment about disrespect, Day’s mouth pulled into a sour frown. “We gave the same amount of respect back. Sure, teachers are criminally underpaid— that’s a topic for another time, actually, but he didn’t even want to be there. Why should we give respect if he wasn’t gonna do the same? You treat your students like people. He didn’t care. That’s unfair.”

Fingers pinching at the bridge of his nose; not mad, just 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍. Though, even he knows how such a thing is no better to Day. Parent sits up from his seat, chair scraping against the floor, bridging the gap to lay his hand on Day's shoulder. Day took after Curt a lot; the missing arm had made him laugh, the golden hair another. But Day's own wide-open heart was something they could only learn from Curt and the 𝚜𝚝𝚞𝚋𝚋𝚘𝚛𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 that came with, well, that was all Mari. He so much as softens his gaze and sighs, heavily.

"That doesn't matter," he shakes his head, though half to keep the lizard quiet. It wonders the same as Day does. "Respect is not a privilege, it's a right. We give it to everyone, even people who don't give it back." It was easier for him to say, maybe. Curt knew many people that deserved respect, higher than the pay they were given, but he firmly believed in everyone recieving it regardless. "Not to mention, that substitute was there to make sure the school still knew where you were. You could've gotten hurt, Day, and I wouldn't have known where you were, who you were with..."

[conngenic]

[[ omg s.cout t.f2 it’s you ]]

[conngenic]

[[ that part in this song where it’s like “I am creation, both haunted and holy / made in glory” makes me think so many lizard thoughts like.. when the lizard finds out it was ‘made’, it does believe itself to be a harbinger of good. like, it has little to no understanding of morality, or goodness, or ‘what is right’ but it wants so badly to try ( and, in that sense, it does have some level of understanding of ‘good’ ). it knows people are afraid of it ( haunted ), but it believes its superhuman abilities ( see: being a giant lizard creature ) make it good or better somehow ( holy ) but, ultimately, made with the purpose of restoring curt’s “former glory” that he believes he lost when he lost his arm ]]

[conngenic]

[[ you know that bit in l.ove is s.trange where george walks in the rain all the way just to see ben... because he missed him ...... curt would do that ]]