I know this post seems like it’s on the wrong blog, but it isn’t, bear with me here.
So, I was re-watching the Avengers, and y’all know the bit with Loki’s speech in Germany? Well, I was thinking: personally, I probably would have knelt when he yelled “KNEEL!” but then I think I would have slipped into DnD mode (my brain goes to strange places when adrenaline takes over) and I would have started mouthing off from my knees and probably gotten myself killed.
In other words, I would have died from inappropriately-timed comments about kink-shaming. And Nazis. I most likely would have pointed out the total lack of subtlety about his “freedom in subjugation” speech taking place in Germany. It was a bit on the nose, you have to admit.
So this is what DnD has done to me: theoretically gotten me murdered by disgruntled Norse gods by training me to respond to powerful and vaguely deific figures with inappropriate snark that may or may not have been in character, people usually just pretend I’m not talking at that point.
Thanks.
PS: Also, it’s like… holy fuck it’s after 4 in the morning, why am I still awake. So anyways, just telling you that to give you context for this very bizarre post. I’m probably going to delete it before it makes it out of the queue. (who am I kidding I’ll totally forget about it and then wake up later today and be like “what the fuck have I done??”)
PPS: It is now precisely one hour later, this post goes up in a little over 45 minutes, and I refuse to acknowledge any regrets.
Imagine how differently The Avengers coulda gone if somebody just shot some Sick Burns™ at Loki when he was in Germany
Thanks. And there would have been much confusion, and possibly some maiming, because isn’t that how every DnD session goes?
Ahahaha! As someone who’s had a player mouth off to a god in such a vein, this is a post I can totally get behind. I mean, the other players all groaned, but man was it fun to mess with as the DM!
Oooh, but do you think Loki’s the type to kill you outright, or curse you in hilariously awful ways until you die?
Depends on whether we’re talking about MCU!Loki or Loki from one of the many and varied comic book universes. Because I’ve only read a few, but it seems to me that MCU!Loki is especially emo and disgruntled. Honestly, I’m tempted to quote my girlfriend’s tag for Kylo Ren to describe him. Its “#disgruntled Hot Topic employee”. But I would like to add “with a grudge”, because he really does, and what was I trying to get at again? Oh, yes. Murder. I’m like 95% certain it would be painful murder, in the context of that thing in Germany.
I have a player that constantly flirts with every enemy we fight, from bandits to eldritch abominations to dark gods.