This Is Not The Dungeon of Good Decisions

NOW I LIVESTREAM! Catch live Pathfinder 2e games at twitch.tv/thedungeonofbaddecisions SUNDAYS AT 7 PM EST, and other days of the week when I can. We have quotes, pictures, recordings and more, of the various tabletop games and campaigns I participate in. None of these things involve sound decision-making. (Credit for the idea for this blog goes to Taylor, the official godmother of the Dungeon of the Dungeon of Bad Decisions). Come check out the Youtube channel! Watch me try to explain various tabletop things: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX-vMGDhcX9h8tw2AIVthAA Chat with me and Taylor and each other on the official Dungeon of Bad Decisions discord server! https://discord.gg/Xkjm7tE Heyo, I've got a Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/thedungeonofbaddecisions

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

KAMEN RIDER

Twitch.tv/thedungeonofbaddecisions

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now in Kamen Rider Ex-Aid! There are so many guys and i hate all of them

Twitch.tv/thedungeonofbaddecisions

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I'm back watching Kamen Rider Ex-Aid and also! I HAVE A BELT! ITS ZOMBIE!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now in Tales from the Borderland!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now in tales from the borderlands

Tumblr is no longer letting me make posts with links so its Twitch.tv/thedungeonofbaddecisions

Just put that in your browser i guess

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now in tales from the borderlands

Also apparently tumblr doesn't like it when i post links anymore so go to my blog description or just search the dungeon of bad decisions on twitch

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

No pants for me, I guess.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Tumblr is not letting me tell people that i am live in tales from the borderlands and idk why

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

The face of a man who keeps losing his toys under the fridge

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now in Tales From The Borderlands! Troubleshooting took Two. Hours.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

It is important to harass your cats as much as they harass you.

(i am very harassed)

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now!

Continuing the Tales from the Borderlands play from NYE!

Twitch

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

DM: Time to get out the Monster Manual, or as some people like to call it: the Waifu Catalogue.

Me: WHAT.

[blimpyou]

Sometimes I smash or pass the whole book

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

What the fuck guys

[ultimatefangirl-exe]

I like to smash or pass monsters in DnD and Pathfinder books.

[theneverlandpiratewitch]

BugBears are legit.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

can we not

[crankywitchgaia]

@celestial-guardian-ragnarok @chika-ann

Smash or pass

[chika-ann]

Heh… that depends… what’s on the list

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

dogs

there are dogs on that list

you wanna fuck a dog

wait

this is tumblr

don’t answer that

[sciencegenius]

dogs? pass.

Liches tho……. ;)))

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

What the fuck

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me

[noblevagrant65]

Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers. 

However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians

[tigressflower007]

IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I don’t think so?

[vriska-coded]

Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.

[novas-grimoire]

…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

[pwbi]

This post is an entire dungeon of bad decisions at this point

[choryllis]

I think you mean legendary decisions

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Legendary for being bad

This is not what i expected when i started this blog

To be fair, i wasnt expecting a whole lot when i started this blog in 2014

But it definitely didnt include 10k notes of thirsty monsterfuckers

[the-cephalon-weave]

11 approaching 12 thousand

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Fuck you’re right

[scamgar]

ok but can we just talk about abberations cuz like they’re intelligent and adults but their minds are inscrutable to humans. so like does that mean you can consent to sex with them? cuz you’re on wayyyy different levels of intelligence? but also they’re an adult with the capacity to give and understand consent? but could a normal sentient’s mind comprehend consenting to sex with them? help me out here i’m confused.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

If both parties are sentient, its just interspecies sex, stop trying to overcomplicate things. Just because one species is better at calculus does not complicate the less intelligent species’ capacity for consent.

[foxofthelake]

Can I just snuggle a clan of kobolds? No porking, just snuggles.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

My friend, I would literally rather die than tell someone they can’t get some consensual snuggling

[kenkuarchive]

@dinodaim1

[babanabread]

on the other hand what about plants.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Are they capable of meaningful consent?

Actually, are you fucking the plants, or are you harvesting them to use as aphrodisiacs? Because most plants and plant-like entities in the bestiary are gonna fuck you up regardless of which you choose.

[thelockenessmonster]

How have all you fucks passed on the hot devil women???

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Because theres no debate on them; if you’re sexually attracted to women or other feminine entities, you’re going to fuck the succubus.

[ghrugirlclub]

Imagine walking into a dungeon and tripping on the first step then breaking every individual bone in your body on the way down the obscenely large staircase that’s probably a hamfisted metaphor to do with descents and all that crap

Yeah that’s what this feels like

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

@nurgletwh how do you think i feel

[oscaronthegloryroad]

With your help we can get it to 50k!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Should I blaze this post? It would be really funny if I blazed this post.

[the-haiku-bot]

Should I blaze this post?

It would be really funny

if I blazed this post.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

I got involved in a debate on the bird site about whether dragons would have a hemipenis — we’re all biologist types, having fun, discussing various reptile genital situations — and then someone CORRECTED me because my theory of dragon schlongs (internal ghost-white collagen bungee penis, like an alligator) DID NOT MATCH HER OC DRAGON PENIS.

She explained HER beliefs of what her OC had as a sexual organ at length and then I quit the bird site.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I like the alligator internal penis idea, actually!

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

Well let’s discuss options:

Turtles have a collagen penis (permanently erect) and then an additional lymph penis. See below

Alligators have a collagen penis completely hidden within the body — the videos are bad but this image is helpful — it’s just sort of bungees out.

Snakes and lizards have a hemipenis — not very visible in this rattlesnake photo but basically a Y shape — and get erections from blood. Spikes and other ornamentation are common!

Ratites are also lymphatic and have kind of a tongue/pyramid situation.

Ducks and co have the seasonal corkscrew penis, see the dude who missed the “beautiful blue bill” boat and also his smaller penis (this year).

And then of course the perching bird cloaca — they do a brief cloaca to cloaca smackaroo for impregnating but the courting behavior can be INCREDIBLE:

Everyone’s understanding of a dragon genital situation is valid and fun as long as 1.) you aren’t demanding that people on the internet have the same interpretation as your milktoast human penis (but big) dragon OC and 2.) itfalls within the rigid boundaries set by this phylogenetic tree:

I did not make a terrible edit on the above image to reflect this but I have thought about it more and if you wanted to make a clownfish dragon where the biggest is designated female that would be amazing and oh man what about a SHARK dragon with the EGG packets or a salamander dragon where they just hang out in their larval form until times get tough and then mate OR like indiscriminate frog attempts at amplexus with everything vaguely dragon-like OR I’m sure you can write something rad! I believe in you all! There might even be a mammal version that’s good!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

This is all super fascinating and I love learning about these things, but I'm stuck on the collagen bungee penis. Like one of those snake-in-a-can pranks, but horny. Boing! It's my dick!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

DM: Time to get out the Monster Manual, or as some people like to call it: the Waifu Catalogue.

Me: WHAT.

[blimpyou]

Sometimes I smash or pass the whole book

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

What the fuck guys

[ultimatefangirl-exe]

I like to smash or pass monsters in DnD and Pathfinder books.

[theneverlandpiratewitch]

BugBears are legit.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

can we not

[crankywitchgaia]

@celestial-guardian-ragnarok @chika-ann

Smash or pass

[chika-ann]

Heh… that depends… what’s on the list

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

dogs

there are dogs on that list

you wanna fuck a dog

wait

this is tumblr

don’t answer that

[sciencegenius]

dogs? pass.

Liches tho……. ;)))

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

What the fuck

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me

[noblevagrant65]

Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers. 

However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians

[tigressflower007]

IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I don’t think so?

[vriska-coded]

Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.

[novas-grimoire]

…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.

[rosstmcd]

I know this post is like five years old, but I just wanted to say that as of Baldur’s Gate 3 (subtitle: Horny in Faerûn) it is canon that dragonborn, at least, have penises and/or vaginas.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Well, damn. That’s kind of boring, not gonna lie.

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

Agreed

[sucker-just]

Not even hemipenes?

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Not even hemipenes! So disappointing! Where's the diversity? Where's the Weird Lizard Genitals™️??

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

DM: Time to get out the Monster Manual, or as some people like to call it: the Waifu Catalogue.

Me: WHAT.

[blimpyou]

Sometimes I smash or pass the whole book

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

What the fuck guys

[ultimatefangirl-exe]

I like to smash or pass monsters in DnD and Pathfinder books.

[theneverlandpiratewitch]

BugBears are legit.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

can we not

[crankywitchgaia]

@celestial-guardian-ragnarok @chika-ann

Smash or pass

[chika-ann]

Heh… that depends… what’s on the list

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

dogs

there are dogs on that list

you wanna fuck a dog

wait

this is tumblr

don’t answer that

[sciencegenius]

dogs? pass.

Liches tho……. ;)))

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

What the fuck

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me

[noblevagrant65]

Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers. 

However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians

[tigressflower007]

IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I don’t think so?

[vriska-coded]

Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.

[novas-grimoire]

…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

[pwbi]

This post is an entire dungeon of bad decisions at this point

[choryllis]

I think you mean legendary decisions

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Legendary for being bad

This is not what i expected when i started this blog

To be fair, i wasnt expecting a whole lot when i started this blog in 2014

But it definitely didnt include 10k notes of thirsty monsterfuckers

[the-cephalon-weave]

11 approaching 12 thousand

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Fuck you’re right

[scamgar]

ok but can we just talk about abberations cuz like they’re intelligent and adults but their minds are inscrutable to humans. so like does that mean you can consent to sex with them? cuz you’re on wayyyy different levels of intelligence? but also they’re an adult with the capacity to give and understand consent? but could a normal sentient’s mind comprehend consenting to sex with them? help me out here i’m confused.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

If both parties are sentient, its just interspecies sex, stop trying to overcomplicate things. Just because one species is better at calculus does not complicate the less intelligent species’ capacity for consent.

[foxofthelake]

Can I just snuggle a clan of kobolds? No porking, just snuggles.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

My friend, I would literally rather die than tell someone they can’t get some consensual snuggling

[kenkuarchive]

@dinodaim1

[babanabread]

on the other hand what about plants.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Are they capable of meaningful consent?

Actually, are you fucking the plants, or are you harvesting them to use as aphrodisiacs? Because most plants and plant-like entities in the bestiary are gonna fuck you up regardless of which you choose.

[thelockenessmonster]

How have all you fucks passed on the hot devil women???

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Because theres no debate on them; if you’re sexually attracted to women or other feminine entities, you’re going to fuck the succubus.

[ghrugirlclub]

Imagine walking into a dungeon and tripping on the first step then breaking every individual bone in your body on the way down the obscenely large staircase that’s probably a hamfisted metaphor to do with descents and all that crap

Yeah that’s what this feels like

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

@nurgletwh how do you think i feel

[oscaronthegloryroad]

With your help we can get it to 50k!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Should I blaze this post? It would be really funny if I blazed this post.

[the-haiku-bot]

Should I blaze this post?

It would be really funny

if I blazed this post.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

I got involved in a debate on the bird site about whether dragons would have a hemipenis — we’re all biologist types, having fun, discussing various reptile genital situations — and then someone CORRECTED me because my theory of dragon schlongs (internal ghost-white collagen bungee penis, like an alligator) DID NOT MATCH HER OC DRAGON PENIS.

She explained HER beliefs of what her OC had as a sexual organ at length and then I quit the bird site.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I like the alligator internal penis idea, actually!

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

DM: Time to get out the Monster Manual, or as some people like to call it: the Waifu Catalogue.

Me: WHAT.

[blimpyou]

Sometimes I smash or pass the whole book

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

What the fuck guys

[ultimatefangirl-exe]

I like to smash or pass monsters in DnD and Pathfinder books.

[theneverlandpiratewitch]

BugBears are legit.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

can we not

[crankywitchgaia]

@celestial-guardian-ragnarok @chika-ann

Smash or pass

[chika-ann]

Heh… that depends… what’s on the list

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

dogs

there are dogs on that list

you wanna fuck a dog

wait

this is tumblr

don’t answer that

[sciencegenius]

dogs? pass.

Liches tho……. ;)))

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

What the fuck

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me

[noblevagrant65]

Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers. 

However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians

[tigressflower007]

IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

I don’t think so?

[vriska-coded]

Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.

[novas-grimoire]

…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.

[rosstmcd]

I know this post is like five years old, but I just wanted to say that as of Baldur’s Gate 3 (subtitle: Horny in Faerûn) it is canon that dragonborn, at least, have penises and/or vaginas.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Well, damn. That's kind of boring, not gonna lie.

[thedungeonofbaddecisions]

Live now for the end of Geats!

Twitch