MY JOURNAL OF THOUGHTS ♡

Trying to find some answers

[cookiemoochie]

Hope I’m doing things rite

Sooooo... I just started sleep training baby K today. The crying really makes me question my purpose in life and whether it’s worth it. I’m glad the room is all dark and I didn’t have to see her teary expression. It’s tough. I just hope things will work out well and she can learn/adapt within the next few days cos I don’t think I’m emotionally strong enough to handle the crying (and sadly at the same time I’m also not physically strong enough to tahan the night awakenings... sigh what a joke mannn)

Please let this work!!

[cookiemoochie]

Relearning how to be thankful

For every passing day, every little smile

Also got to remember to be thankful for every hiccup, every didn’t-go-so-well

Because every day is a step towards the exciting uncertain future, and is something that we will look back on next time, make us feel warm inside and smile unconsciously

I think, I will, one day, truly miss days like these. Both the good and the bad.

[cookiemoochie]

New.

New lifestyle

New priorities

New things to look forward to

It feels so in place I kind of forgot how I’ve lived my life before

Always adjusting to new equilibriums, because everything keeps changing

But I’m so thankful things are getting better (thank you, little one)

I’m tired, but excited

[cookiemoochie]

:) :|

Excited & scared....... .______.

[cookiemoochie]

Stay positive & happy

Countdown to 1st May... If its meant to be Let’s go yf

[cookiemoochie]

Retrospective review

Trying to find an equilibrium in life Lots of changes ongoing still , but moving ahead and learning in bits Making mistakes and a thousand mental notes On things that matter, and lots more that don’t Overthinking things (as usual) and trying hard to find solutions to problems that aren’t there in the first place Balancing between things I like and things I don’t , but should probably be doing Think I’m more ?light-hearted than before, I was an unforgiving person in the past , had lots of facepalming moments and self-criticism lol The current flow is good Think I can go on like this for some time Trying to enjoy the process And making meaning of my youth Hehe

[cookiemoochie]

Stay positive

& enjoy the break!!!!!!

& find some inspiration =)))

[cookiemoochie]

Slowly but surely

Babysteps x100000 to the final goal

Breathe

[cookiemoochie]

4.11.17

Time passing waaaay too quickly Getting waaay too stressed out everytime I look at my to-do list Inertia is too big and too many things to handle at once I just need one day off, to have a kopi gao and deep breathing before I dive into the list of things & strike things down one by one Or maybe what I need is to wake up & stop running away from my problems, cos they will just snowball into bigger ones Urggggh The only way for me to move on and handle more incoming shit... is to face the current shit. Just do it

[cookiemoochie]

Wat am I doing with my life

Time is on ur side Make the best out of it!!! You CAN reduce ur stress in the future by taking action NOW!! Come on yf

[cookiemoochie]

Be very, very careful

Of yourself....

[cookiemoochie]

Back from holiday

Done with this checkpoint, now have to look forward and start working towards the next one.

Let’s go yf you can do itttt

[cookiemoochie]

You know you're fucked when...

1) Your coffee doesn't make you any less drowsy and you feel the palpitations setting in

[cookiemoochie]

Can I do this?

Apprehensive as hell now. Can I do this? In 2014-2015 I survived, pushed through and changed the honors class on my grad paper In 2015-2016 I survived pre-registration training, got my license and stayed in where I wanted to be, amidst the chaotic allocations In 2016-2017 I survived my early work years with minimal turbulence and still pushing through I'm lazy and unmotivated but if given desperate times actually I have the ability to adapt and learn new skills and survive... and if I extrapolate, technically I can survive 2017-2018, right??? Can't breathe. Have faith YFFFF You can one don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone..... You hate it but eventually you have to face tough times anyway... Stop thinking so much just do it

[cookiemoochie]

Stressed

About the things ahead... You always believed in living for yourself and doing what makes you truly happy.. But when you stop and look around, to what extent are you living to fulfill the expectations of others? And if you imagine yourself to have zero accountability to anyone, you may be leading an entirely different life.. A life that you can't lead now..

[cookiemoochie]

Hello, October 2016

Some update after 6 full months of working with a license- I have completed my first shiftwork cycle!!!! Good job YF! Basically its working 14 days of 12 hour shifts (Either day or night-time) during a 28 day cycle as an on-call pharmacist, the goods are obviously the 14 off days! The bad... basically learning everything again both the logistics and the clinical side of things. Sadly once I have mastered most of it it ended and I’m having trouble adjusting back to my 9-6 days doing back the old stuff. Sigh.

Anyway back to my daily grind, I have to embrace the shit I’m in!! That’s the only way to move forward, yes? If I keep fighting it and resisting my path, I’ll just die a terrible, lonely death. I got to change my mindset and be proactive in learning like a sponge, don’t be afraid to work hard, just do it .... Got to expel the laziness in me, come on.

And also, give thanks to amount of free time I have and make the best out of it! Do some useful things other than gaming... Good days like this won’t last, got to maximise time..!! Just do it YF. Be responsible for yourself! >:(

[cookiemoochie]

Recovered !!

All good to start work again! One more week to shiftwork, let's go 💪🏻💪🏻 Need some food for the soul, need to get more positive reads done :)