poet king.

he's a brave man, but deep down, he'd rather be taming horses.

[cordbound]

#CORDBOUND : an independent and selective dungeons & dragons original character, crossover friendly but with a focus on fantasy and d&d themes. written and loved by darby ( she/her, 26 ) !! — established february 2024.

"My healed [ ... ] wound / Transformed into a gate / Where I receive love from / Where I give love from."

——lawrence aurelius highfield, paladin of ilmater and savior of the damned

links :  main carrd​ , lore carrd​ , verse nav , extended nav , pinterest​

[cordbound]

jumping on here after an accidental 5 month hiatus to say hi

[cordbound]

hey crit role watchers how we doin 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[cordbound]

starting a new job saturday so apologies for my sparseness as i get adjusted to my new schedule!

[cordbound]

adults like to make things so simple and boring, don't they? (from elijah ,, )

"what, you don't enjoy boring?" there's a teasing lilt to lawrence's voice, a rare thing to be so prominent in his usually even tone. "i happen to find boring perfectly enjoyable, don't you?" an arm is thrown around elijah's shoulder. the action appears casual, but is more thought out than it seems. their hips brush together as lawrence pulls close, the dark denim of their jeans rubbing together as he leans nearer. "now why don't you tell me what this is all about, hmm?"

[cordbound]

finishing up drafts here then jumping over to @taverngossip so jump over there for some multi shenanigans!

[cordbound]

can you do something good by doing something bad?

"florence, that is something i have asked myself... for a very long time." is this not the eternal question that weighs on his soul? is it acceptable to do the morally objectionable to accomplish something for the greater good? can certain monsters only be driven out by other monsters? do the ends ever justify the means?

is that even something his soul could withstand?

he thinks of the boys who held his face to the flames, of the cruelty born from their blackened hearts. he thinks of his father; his father who tried so hard to break him, to force him to fit into the warrior mold. how desperately edward wished to make a hunter of his boy — and it is in this reflection that lawrence gets as close to an answer as he thinks he will ever be capable of.

"the answer will be different for everyone. for me, for you. the only thing i can say with certainty is that the greatest victory i have known is that when the time came for me to face my father, to kill him or to spare him... despite everything he put me through, everything he tried to make me... i could not stomach the thought of hurting him."

lawrence quiets, his words stirring in the quiet air between them. "that is to say, i think i did something bad by letting my father live. but it is the only decision i could have made, and it proved to him that nothing he could do would make me into the shape he wishes. and that, for better or for worse, is something good. i have to believe that."

[cordbound]

trying to convince my friends to play tomb of annihilation w me like guys no its okay you'll probably all get poisoned and die but it'll be finee-----

[saintsdawn-a]

do i have a home? the thought is unwanted, but it still comes. a question worth its weight in gold: do i have a home? they think of barovia, and the villages, and the churches. is there someone in that dark land that cares?

“ you might be right, but i’m also fond of four solid walls and a roof. ” if it isn’t awkward silences, it is awkward jokes. “ someone caring is warmer, i think. ”

and then, before they lose the confidence, “ do you have a home ? ”

[cordbound]

his lips press into a thin line, the shriveled corner trying and failing to meet its twin. before he can even speak it, however, florence voices his thoughts as if they read them. back in greyridge, lawrence had far more than four walls — an entire kingdom lay at his fingertips, the land of his father's father and beyond. and yet, he can only recall the place for its icy cold and loneliness. his mother's warmth, his sisters' — even they could not fully beat away the chill of his father's wrath.

pulled from his reveries, lawrence takes a moment before smiling gently. "i take it you don't just mean four solid walls and a roof, do you?" he laughs a quiet laugh. "i suppose i would say my home is in the heart of The Broken Lord, however cliched a response that is."

[incuocationarchive]

a hum in agreement. "is it not always a blessing to live to see another day, no matter what the circumstances may be?"

[cordbound]

"that is certainly true," he chuckles in turn. "but we should praise the days that fall gently upon us. it helps us remember that we experience the good far more than we experience the bad."

[notmorbid]

the lamb.

dialogue prompts from the lamb by lucy rose.

we are what we eat.

a big meal always makes me tired.

the trees guard us from the outside world.

all strays love stories.

men are stupid when they feel powerful. they become complacent.

we're woven from different cloth.

i want to know you inside out.

you always smile at children and old people.

you're more complicated than i first imagined.

most adults are up to no good. i don't trust a single one.

i like that you're weird.

i want a love like fire, that leaves the world around me charred.

the stories are just that: stories.

has anyone told you that you have a beautiful smile?

i'm right where you left me.

i've never understood why mamas are expected to be perfect.

you're different from the others.

you can stay as long as you need.

the things that happen to us change us, little one.

we can't save each other. not really.

what's the special ingredient?

this is where i belong. with you.

it's okay if you can't find the words.

please. let me keep you.

you can't ever curb someone's true nature.

i think ____ misses you.

i'm only looking after you. i hope you know that.

adults like to make things so simple and boring, don't they?

it's okay to tell someone.

you have to be braver than me.

tell someone, if something is wrong. promise.

now that i've found you, i'm never going to leave.

you make me feel so full i could be sick.

you just have to apply pressure in the right place.

you can't miss someone you didn't truly know.

you loved the idea of me, before you peeled back all the layers.

i really thought i'd met my person.

no one ever really changes.

do you think the devil has horns? the devil looks as ordinary as you and me.

kids aren't supposed to be older or wiser than their parents.

keep yourself on the straight and narrow. you'll be okay if you do that.

i feel quite lonely.

i want to be friends with you. friends that share their secrets, and talk about boys.

it is such a lie that we have to love our own blood.

i feel we've known each other longer than our hearts have beaten.

adults fear what they can't understand.

the years feel longer when you're not loved the way you want to be.

i'm not just a mother. i'm a whole person.

i'm just trying to love you. protect you.

you can show me the blackest part of your heart. i will not flinch.

the scenery looks different, but the people are all the same.

nothing mattered until i met _____.

take those feelings and hide them. push them down. keep them in the dark.

boys and men always lie about the silliest things.

sometimes i think about you in ways i'm not supposed to.

maybe one day we'll live together, and we can hold hands all day. as much as we please.

i'd tell you if something was wrong. i promise.

is it something i can help with?

if i went missing, would you notice i was gone?

someone has to swallow their pride and make things okay.

can you do something good by doing something bad?

what's this bad thing you're so worried about?

you don't keep your heartbreak locked away, do you?

i'm not lying. cross my heart.

when you love someone, you promise to love all of them. even the ugly bits.

i hope you give yourself a paper cut.

can i draw you?

are you alone, too? like me?

to me, you are a church.

maybe i'm already like you.

i want to share everything with you.

you've not lived yet. not really.

i'm not bored of you. i'm sick of you.

i could have been so much more than this.

i don't want to be a mother.

i'm never going to tell you i'm sorry.

i dream of hurting you, and i like the way it feels.

do you think i'm ugly?

we all have a bit of dark inside. and light, too.

i thought families were supposed to keep each other safe.

it'll be over quick. i promise.

i've spent thousands of days hiding, changing myself.

this is what love is supposed to feel like.

i want to remember you forever.

don't look back. not once.

[cordbound]

' i recognise this symbol. ' honestly i'm obsessed with lawrence; love me an ilmater paladin <3

the paladin looks over to his companion, following her gaze to the symbol in question. he is grateful it is familiar to one of them, because it bears no similarity to anything lawrence has seen before. a local marking, perhaps? or the insignia of a regional organization? hailing from the wintery norths himself, the nature of such intricacies of the sword coast would indeed be lost to him. once again, he is fortunate to have others at his side.

"what is it, laera? what have you found?"

[nightingealed]

"and sometimes a third, and fourth, and fifth..." ellie's smile is soft in response, a concession on her features to her own habit of forgiveness, and often to her own detriment, before ducking her face down to hide it, continuing to tend the fire under the pot, preparing the meal for the camp and their companions. "there are fewer fates more grim than to be alone. ... is that what pulled you to ilmater? or did you pull him to you?" 

[cordbound]

his smiles grows in turn, a crooked but endearing thing. it is just so difficult not to beam when his own philosophies are so wonderfully reflected back to him. "indeed," lawrence concurs. oh, how his heart warms at forgiveness and understanding! and to know it is not only he who values such things.

"it is true, Ilmater saved me from my loneliness." the paladin watches a careful hand adjust the logs, a small burst of cinders lighting then fading as quickly as they came. "but he must have seen in my heart, my desperation to save others from theirs."

the fire burns, and lawrence recalls the flame that both destroyed him and saw him born anew. the scars that mar his face are ugly and stiff, and yet, it is the mark that makes him in his Lord's image. he nods, eyes shifting from firelight to meet those of his companion's. "yes, i cannot help but think i was made to be loved by Him. and to love others in His name."

[cordbound]

starter for olvain @soulsache!!

"my mama raised me better than that."

[cordbound]

starter for @incuocation!!

"it's a beautiful morning, it's a beautiful day."

[cordbound]

starter for wil @sanctos!!

"i'm waking up with bruises i don't recognize."

[cordbound]

#CORDBOUND : an independent and selective dungeons & dragons original character, crossover friendly but with a focus on fantasy and d&d themes. written and beloved by darby ( she/her, 26 ) !! — established february 2024. ©

everything is a target, says the hunter. no matter where you look. the hunter's son says nothing, and closes his eyes.