I don’t know if this is intentional or if I’m reading too much into it, but this show is soo deliberate with the details...I’m taking my shot.
When Ilya talks about his family in Russia treating him like a bank, an asset, someone who exists to provide - it’s not just about money.
It’s about expectation. About being useful. About making sure everything is perfect, even when the respect is never returned.
He talks about the clothes being right, the food being exactly how everyone likes it, and making sure everyone has what they need.
And I can’t stop thinking about the tuna melt scene. When he asks if Shane’s ginger ale is cold enough.
On the surface, it’s sweet. Thoughtful. Intimate. Ilya already knows Shane likes ginger ale - but he still checks. Still wants it to be right. Perfect.
And yes, it’s tender. Soft-boy Ilya ftw. But it also feels like muscle memory. Like this is how Ilya has learned to love: anticipating needs, adjusting himself, making sure everyone else is satisfied.
That same instinct that makes him such a gentle, careful partner - is also the thing that’s been demanded of him his entire life.
Which makes the moment both beautiful....and a little heartbreaking.
Because Ilya caring for Shane feels genuine and chosen - but it’s impossible not to see how much of that care comes from years of being told that this is his value.