The conventional wisdom about being an aunt is that it is "fun stuff only, return to parents for difficult things" really only applies to like, babyhood which I am least interested in. I am struggling now because I am just a witness to the teen years, and in a lot of ways the kids are really just an abstraction for me. I think they know I love and care about them, and they trust me, but it's not a super close relationship (hard to get that when I live in a different state). Still, now that they are getting independent it can be extra challenging to spend time with them because I feel like I am trapped in some thriller where they are headed in slow motion for disaster but there's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm not their parent, no one has asked for my opinion (and boy do I have some!!!), and ultimately these things are just out of my control. But if I could control it I would do things so differently!!!! All I can do is witness and try to let them know I care about their suffering 😭