I heading into month two of searching for my dog, Myrtle, who ran away from her dogsitter while I was out of town in early October.
"How long will you keep looking for her?"
"It's ok to stop now, you've done more than anyone would do to find their dog!"
These are some of the things I hear from friends. I can't blame them, they don't want to see me sad and worn out. But I can't let her go, not yet.
Note: Stupid Hurricane Sandy has destroyed homes and businesses, so I can't sit here and feel sorry for myself. There are definitely more traumatic events that can happen to someone. So don't feel sorry for me, either!
So how does this relate to you, your creative business endeavors? While I have watched many succeed, I have seen many talented people give in or give up. You've probably seen them too, a new Etsy shop with a handful of beautiful items in it that hasn't been updated in over a month.
Here are some questions to ask yourself, hopefully the answers will keep you going, help you tie that knot at the end of your rope.
Can you rely on one person you trust that believes in you?
Is everyone around you trying to send you signs to move on? What are their motivations? Often, others are focused on fear, and they don't want to see you fail or get hurt. Listen to those you love and trust, but also understand their motivation.
If you have no support, you need to find it. When you're in a tough place, feeling alone can break you. I was talking to a friend about this emotional roller coaster I'm on and she said, "There's got to be a support group for people who have lost their dog!" And you know what? There is!
Are you taking care of yourself?
This is a tough one for me. Are you eating, sleeping (but not sleeping all day), able to socialize? Or does worry consume you? What I've done is given myself an ultimatum – you can continue on this mission if you take care of yourself.
Are your emotions out of whack?
Sure, you can have moments that are full of sadness, anger, anxiety, but you can't live like that for long. When you see an artist making work similar to yours do you immediately think they are copying you? Can you be happy for successful artists in your field?
Don't give up because you can't emotionally deal with the stress. Instead, reframe, refocus. If you're focusing on other artists, that's time you can be coming up with new work. If I lie around sad and feeling sorry for myself, that's time I'm not taking care of myself, or looking for Myrtle.
Are you relying on hope or do you have faith?
Do you have faith that everything will work out, no matter what happens? Or do you hope that everything will work out?
Hope is sitting there on your hands, waiting for that magic moment. Faith means you'll do your best and accept that no matter what the outcome, you'll be strong enough to continue on.
Have you done all that most of what can be done?
Give yourself a set period of time and goals to meet before giving up. Be realistic. Try goals that reflect a life and business that you can be proud of and don't make it about numbers. When I hear milestone goals like, "I want to hit 100 sales.", I cringe. These type of goals are often arbitrary. What does that mean, exactly?
Now, I know I'm on a mission to Find Myrtle, but I'm also using this opportunity to fuel my passion for animal welfare. What other little goals can you meet along this path?
Know that there is always more you can do to try to make something work, but decide what lengths you are willing to go to...
...and then give it one more good push.
This is what I do. When I'm out looking for Myrtle, and it's cold, and I'm tired, I say to myself, "15 more minutes." Then, when I go home, I feel like I did try my best. I can sleep at night.
I encourage you to prove everyone wrong, or at least prove, even if it's to yourself, that you gave it your all. Only then will you be able to move on (if you have to) with your head up, and you will have learned as much as you could from this to take on your next challenge.
I'm sure you've been at a similar spot in life, personally or in your creative professional life: spent, tired, emotional, ready to give up. I'd love to hear what you've done to overcome these tough moments. Feeling supported and understood can make all the difference, so I'm asking you to record a quick snippet and email me it to me! I'll piece them together with some thoughts of my own and feature them in my next podcast and on the Creative Little Beast blog.
Here's an easy way to record using Quicktime. To make an audio-only recording, open up Quicktime, simply choose New Audio Recording from the File menu. Then hit the record button!
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