drowning_vicky

whatever suits your rotten heart.

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

I scream into the empty wind with everything I've got in me.

(yet the wind doesn't speak. Where did the music go? Is it me? Is it me who ripped away the melody from its words? Am I the one who stitched its words into silence)

I keep telling you

I keep telling -

...That I lie

That's all I do.

So why did you believe me when I said I'm clean;

That I do not hurt myself anymore

Why did you trust my lies

Why did you not dig up my grave and check

Why did you believe me when I told you I was fine

[reg-j]

"Learning math under blanket forts" by me, Reg J.

We used to be best friends. "Inseparable. I haven't seen many siblings like that." My mum would say on repeat. Our tears soaked each other's tops and almost became one. We yelled because teenage hormones had a hold on us, but we were always best friends by morning. Laughing about the stupid shit we were fighting about the night before as we sit and talk about everything from dad to the imaginary worlds we escaped into and the times when we were little, learning math under blanket forts. You still tell me you'll kill me, but it feels less like a joke. You still yell at me, but it's not followed by a laugh. We still talk, but we don't know each other anymore. We still love each other, but all you see is a failure like dad... I wish you knew how I cried that night. Laughing hysterically and inconsolable because you couldn't be around me after all those years of standing at the door together, running through fields and into ocean water, standing in front of dad because he got mad and I'll never let him bruise you like he did to me. You're the best and the worst of me. You're stronger than I'll ever be, but god, you know how to stab deep in the most vital organs... I wish you could know me. I wish you knew how much it aches being everything he isn't and being perfect because everyone always holds me to the same standards I do myself... I wish you could know me and sit with me and do nothing but laugh because I never said I would always be better than dad, I only ever promised to try, and God knows I never stopped trying. God knows it hurts.

Poem from my series, "Hit me where it hurts most"

[bleedinginksworld]

[lynione34]

draft: i judged

i sliced until my skin around the blade curled upwards

a canyon forming deep deep deep

until the blood was dripping down my ribs

waiting on the bone

running from my eyes

waiting on the bone

running as i rise

i have become all i once judged

[ceruleanheaven]

i am always one wrong word away from being shot by all the people who find me tolerable

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

I'm afraid

I'm afraid I'm forgetting your face.

I can't remember your smiles

How they lit up your face

How your eyes shine when you talk about her

How you look so lost in love when you look at her

It makes me wonder if I'm worth you

If I deserve this gift of wish

If I'm allowed to even wish

If I'm allowed to simply doubt

I cannot bear to look at the stars because they remind me of you.IT HURTS

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

Petals of pain.

Sometimes pain in itself doesn't look so visibly painful;

Sometimes it's a yellow flower with a beautiful butterfly on it-

Sometimes it flies and flies and flies and flies around the flower with its head held high , euphoric from the nectar.

It flies and flies with the wind caressing its beautiful wings ,until it spirals down the endless heights of happiness and meet its end.

[yournichepoet]

Antonio

There is a feeling in my chest that I could rip my heart out like Antonio, the only difference being that no blood would come out because I am hollow

As hollow as the murderer's heart, my mind is filled with rage and sorrow, a sorrow so deep that no light of hope reaches it's depths and my rage so grand that it may cover the earth and plunge in into eternal death and destruction

The marrow of my being is shallow, as shallow as the murky waters in which my body lays forever floating in this vast dread

(Note: I know Antonio(the merchant of venice) does not 'rip his heart out' I just used it as a symbol to show intense emotional pain)

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

I ,the wind who forgot to embrace the trees. I, who stilled the mountains into grief.

(A beautiful imagery is what you call when u can visualise the tragedy <3.)

You see the reckoning of it,

Yet all you do is stay still-

Still as the mountains who forgot the touch of the clouds,

Trees which forgot the embrace of the wind.

~The stillness of things abandoned for too long,

They acquire violent crawling roots.

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

"This love which promises all but love itself.

~All the intensity of love, but not the safety of it."

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

Something about promising yourself to get better

And still hiding knives in every corner of your existence

Still finding blades between pages of your book

Still saving all the sharp things which hurt , when you had promised to get better

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

TW: SH

For You, I Would Choose Tomorrow.

I would live for you.

I would snatch my life from the hands of death and force myself to LIVE-

For you.

For you I would bandage my wounds.

For you I would throw away my blades and reject my tendency to fall.

("If you do not know how to love yourself, how will you hold on to things you claim you love without breaking them?")

[crookedtidalwavewitch]

Finding Patterns In Sand.

Sorrow is beautiful

Beautiful the way you find a wolf beautiful

The way you see a deer wilting and plunge down into grief

The way you feel bad for the cunning fox

(Does the cunning fox ever feel lonely?)

The way you look at your reflection and see someone else

The way you seek happiness but spiral nonetheless

It's like finding patterns in sand;

Searching for evidence in the vast ocean of lives which are hardly lasting to grow flowers.