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@crossbowrevolution-blog
He wasnât sure how heâd gotten where he talked to her, when he didnât talk to anyone else in his life. Most people got the âIâm fineâ line of bullshit that he sold everyone else. But, no one really expected him to be fine, or Clay did. Clay had made it clear. Jax needed to show people that Abel was either dead and heâd do whatever it took to avenge him or he needed to show them that Abel was alive and heâd kill anyone he had to get him back. Jax would do anything to get his son back and he knew that Sammi deserved revenge for what happened to Sack too. Basically, all of this shit was just fucked up. That was the only way to really explain it.
He shrugged. âYeah, I guess. Â I sure as hell feel like itâs my fault. I should have taken care of Cameron before. Had we not patched up that goddamn Irishman then he wouldnât have taken my kid.â Had Zobelle not raped his mother, they wouldnât have been after him and Abel wouldnât have been off with Gemma and Tara. âIf I feel too much, it will suck. I do better not feeling anything.â Â He shrugged. âI dunno. It just feels like it. I donât even connect to anyone, anymore, not anyone Iâm supposed to, anyway.â
Sam wasnât planning on saying anything to anyone about her brother. She wasnât planning on conversing with them unless it was club business. Being personal wasnât exactly her thing. However, it felt like he needed her to be. She needed this for herself, too. Being completely closed off wasnât healthy. But then again, she was never concerned with her own health.
âIf it wasnât this, itâd be something else. I canât tell you if that something else would be worse or not, but it would be there... Either way, you didnât know this would happen,â She wasnât entirely sure how to explain to him how she was feeling but she wanted him to know that something was there for her, âYeah, I guess Iâm the same way at times... But with this? You canât expect yourself to be completely numb. Itâs personal and not the kind of club business personal. He went after your family. Someone who had no part of this,â Her hands moved down from his neck, to his arms, to his hands as she squeezed them lightly, âBut you connect to someone, right? I might be wrong, but as long as youâre connecting with someone and theyâre not hurting you or anyone else, you should let it happen,â She shrugged as well, âThat might just be what I think, though... Jax, you deserve to feel. You deserve to hate and love; you deserve to be angry, sad, happy, or excited. You deserve to be human.â
Jax was having a hard time holding all of it in sometimes. Shit was such a mess. He didnât know how all this could have happened, how Sack could have gotten killed, Abel taken. It was all overwhelming and he was having a hard time and between his momâs shit with having to be on the run and not connecting to Tara, he was just a mess.
Then she had pulled him into a hug and he hesitated at first, but then let her and he sighed. Comfort wasnât his thing but he was trying. Â âIâm not that great of a person. Halfsack should never have gotten killed. None of this shit should be happening.â Â He then sighed. âI canât do that. I have to be strong.â Â He inhaled her scent and sighed. âWhy does it all suck?â
Sammi was lucky to have Jax in her life. She didnât know what sheâd do without him. Things wouldâve been much worse for her at least. She couldnât imagine what it was like for him, though. Losing a child? There was a different kind of loss in that. No matter how close she and Kip were.
She shook her head at his words whilst her eyes filled with tears. This man had the ability to break down her walls and make her show emotions, âYouâre trying and thatâs more than a lot of people can say around here... Sack wouldâve done anything for this club and he died a hero. It wasnât your fault he was killed and itâs not your fault that Abel was taken,â She pulled away, her hands placed on the back of his neck, âAround me? Being strong is the last thing you need to do. Youâre not some machine. You have the right to feel; especially in this situation,â She glanced to the floor then back to him, âI wish I could tell ya. Thatâs just life, I guess. But it doesnât have to all be bad, right?â
@redwoodteller
Jax didnât know how to talk about any of the shit that they were going through. They were going through so much, and then the shit just came out of his mouth.
âYeah, Iâm hurt right now.â He just wanted his son back. Everything was a mess. He and Tara were a mess. He was pretty sure that was over and no matter what he had told her, that wasnât what he wanted. Â âHe was tough. What he lacked in balls, he sure made up for in bravery.â Sack had been definitely going to make patch. Heâd deserved it, even without dying. Â He sighed. âIâm trying. Sometimes being strong just really sucks.â
All Sammi could do was stare. Seeing the guy who was easily the strongest man she met cry in that way was strange to say the least. Who knew she would have to be the strong one?
She hesitated a moment before taking him and pulling him into a hug, âIâve got you, Jax. Alright? Iâve got you,â This girl wasnât the best when it came to comforting people, but she was trying, âYouâre the best person Iâve ever known and thatâs saying a lot coming from me... Iâm the person who looks up to everyone. Or I used to, anyways,â She sighed, gripping him tighter, âI want you to pull yourself together, but I know that this whole situation is shit... So you can crumble for a minute. Iâll be the strong one and you donât have to,â Moving away from him, she locked the door before returning and embracing him once more. The last thing Teller needed was someone barging in on him in this state.
// I know I owe @brckenmartyr @zosoperfect and @perfectxenemy and I will get to those soon! In the meantime, like for a starter?Â
Please reblog this if youâre totally cool with writing with writers who donât feel comfortable with writing smut.
kristyrps:
Not because theyâre underage, but because they are of age and donât really have a taste for smut or generally just are bored with it, or they mainly want to focus on other things pertaining a relationship between two characters.
@redwoodteller
âHe nodded. He knew he had been lashing out. Heâd been pushing everyone away from him who cared. It was easier to push people away, than to break down in tears that his kid was gone. âYeah, I do that too, and itâs never me who gets hurt. Itâs Halfsack, Abel, people I care about.â Â He nodded. âThanks. I just really need someone on my side, someone I can count on. You have as much in this, as I do. He didnât just take my son. He killed your brother.â He was just so down about all this. He loved his son so much. âIâm going to find him, right? Iâm going to find Abel?â
Carefully watching him, her lips pursed. Sam was already feeling terrible for Jax, but the look on his face made everything worse. He was a good guy. He didnât deserve what he got.
âIt looks to me like youâre hurt right now,â She put her hand on his shoulder, forcing herself into his line of sight, âIâll always be on your side. I donât double cross and even if I did, I wouldnât with you,â Her jaw clenched as she nodded to what he was saying, âYeah, Kip... You were his family and youâre mine, too,â His question absolutely broke Samâs heart. She had no idea if they would find him or not, âWe will, alright? I swear on my life that Iâll make it happen. You need to pull yourself together, though. Not only for the club, but for Abel. Thereâll be plenty of time to do this once we get him back.â
Rules: Pick four colors you associate with your muse. Then use the gif search-function and search for the color. Post one gif for each color. Tag 10 other roleplayers to do this.
Tagged by: @noxredemption
Tagging: @redwoodteller @brckenmartyr @kingofthe100 @zosoperfect  @h-opewinston @butstillyouwake @consequentson @lcstlcnleybcy @obscuritex @xyourperfectdisasterx
@perfectxenemy
âWell I didnât really socialize much in the past, I just did my job and went about my business. I didnât become a social person until the mid seventiesâ
âHey, Fido... I want to ask you something else... Can you make someone immortal? Iâve lost everyone I care about and maybe having more time will help me. Hell, it could help he both of us.â
@perfectxenemy
âYou ainât lying, Iâve been alive for nearly a century and Iâve changed over the years from a life loving person to a miserable wreck to a brooding asshole, so believe, I knowâ
âYeah, youâve got me beat there... How do you do it? Losing everyone thatâs not immortal?â
@perfectxenemy
âTime changes people... And Iâve been here a while.â
redwoodteller
He nodded. âItâs cool. Iâm sorry too. Iâm just really fucking frustrated over all this.â  He knew that sheâd lost her brother and Sack was a decent guy. He was weird as fuck but he would have been a great member of SAMCRO. He hated that he survived everything he did in Iraq to get killed saving his kidâs life.
âYou can help. I just, I need you to, if I tell you to stay out of danger, do it. Thatâs what Iâve been dealing with, with Tara too. I had to push her away because she had to stay safe, so Iâve got all that shit. But, help wouldnât be awful.âÂ
âYou donât need to apologize, Jax,â But in her opinion, he should let her do all that she could. If they didnât get his kid back, then Kip would have died for nothing. Sam couldnât let that be the case.
âIâm not someone who is ever in danger, Iâm the one who creates it,â She explained in a semi-lighter tone than before. No matter how much she cared for the Teller boy and his family, she wanted to be nothing like Tara. She could take care of herself and even help the club with these types of situations, âDonât worry about me staying safe. I know my limits... But Iâll follow your orders and only yours.â
Text:
Sammi: That is an absolutely terrible idea
Sammi: I hope you're ready for the consequences if caught... They're gonna be bad
Sammi: And as always, I'm in
@brckenmartyr
âIt turns out not all grounders appreciate what we did,â Sam sighed, walking up to Clarke. After she had taken the flame and saved them, almost killing herself in the process, they still didnât care. The two girls setting out to find the next Nightblood wasnât working as well as hoped, this was a prime example. With a busted open eyebrow and blood running down her eye and cheek, Sam was pissed that she didnât find a place safe for Clarke to stay, âWeâll have to keep going... I still think itâs a good idea to just turn around, though.â
Like this for a starter?
I wanna get back into the swing of things and have more interactions, so why not? If you wanna plot instead, feel free to DM me! They might be smaller, potentially only dialogue, but weâll see once I start writing.
For @zosoperfect
The girl fiddled with her hands looking up to the other. She had been on her own for so long it was a little unnerving to see someone else, âCan I help you?â She questioned rather harshly. She was ready to fight if she had to. Not once would she let her guard down in this situation.
@redwoodteller
âWell the way I see it, it is my son. My mother is off on the run right now, doesnât even know Abelâs gone yet. Pushing me on this and deciding that you know what I need would not be the best. Tara tried telling me she knew what I needed, so maybe you should approach it a little differently than telling me what I need. My son, I control how he is found. Understood?â He took a deep breath. He did not handle being told what to do by anyone, period.
âWe probably could, but you donât tell me what I need or you leave. No one decides how to find my son, but me. Not Clay, no one else in the club. He is my son.â
Sam sighed nodding carefully. He was right, she should have handled her words better. That wasnât something which came easy, though, âYouâre right... Iâm sorry,â She just needed something after her brother. Something that made her feel important and needed. All her life, she had taken care of Kip and one day he was just gone.
âI understand. The last thing I wanted was to upset you, Jax. If you want me to stay, Iâll stay. But if you want me to help, if you want me to do anything besides sitting on my ass, then let me know... I guess I just wanted to do this so desperately because of Kip.â