CrypticCorpse

He/Him | 19 | Tired asf. Blog consists of reblogs, vent and sometimes art. Might change later though

[crypticcorpse]

#BlackLivesMatter

#Justice4George

#ICantBreathe

#NoJusticeNoPeace

#NoRacistPolice

#FuckTrump

Fuck off my profile if you supprt some all lives matter shit.

[ms-indpndnt]

There are thousandsnof words but there's this one that I wanna hear the most

"Sorry"

No one ever sincerely apologized for doing me wrong. It was always me who begged for forgiveness even if I'm not at fault. Everyone made me feel like I deserved the shitty treatments and that I don't deserve apologies for it.

I was thrown away by my parents. I don't wanna go into details but that's what they actually did.

I was called names.

I got cussed at for things as petty as accidentally ruining a mobile game.

I was locked out of the house simply because I got home late from a dinner with friends.

I was threatened to be left alone if I didn't give in to orders. I was always scared and I'll come rushing home, leaving everyone behind.

I was scowled at for anything that didn't went well.

I was blamed for everything. I was told that being with me was the worst decision a person ever made. That other things could've been chosen over me. That I wasn't worth fighting for.

I was neglected most of the time, stood up by people who made plans with me. I was looking forward to every hangout to escape my loneliness but no one really cared about cancelling plans with me on the last minute. Oh, it wasn't even last minute. I was waiting for hours already before knowing it is cancelled.

I've got tons, but these are the heaviest pain that I've been holding for long. Why did I never receive a sincere apology for all these? It broke my heart, and the people involved knows it, but why did they never say "Sorry" with sincerety? The way people apologize to me sounds so insincere like "Okay, I said sorry. Its done anyway.". Why? Why am I not worthy of their apologies? I often bring up how upset I still am with these things but I'd be called overreacting over something that happened in the past. I talk about how upset I am, while crying, but instead of apologizing, peeps would get mad at me. Is it so hard to apologize to me? Do I really deserve those things? I know I'm not perfect and I may have done things that hurt others but I always make sure to apologize for it properly. Why do people make me upset and just let it be forgotten as time goes by? I don't forget. The longer it has been, the greater the pain that it gives me. I may have forgiven people but I'll never forget what they've done.

I did and gave my best for you, why can't you tell me a single word of regret?

[crypticcorpse]

If I'm being honest here. This merely describes most of the things I've been through it's almost terrifying. You're honestly so valid.

[awthor-deactivated20260115]

recommend a listen or two : a playlist

1. lung : vancouver sleep clinic

2. wildfire : vancouver sleep clinic

3. maps : keaton henson

4. i am not in love anymore : liza anne

5. sister : haux

6. embody me : novo amor

7. colourway : novo amor

8. carry you : novo amor

9. living water : vancouver sleep clinic

10. the puglist : keaton henson

11. rebirth : vancouver sleep clinic

12. you don’t know how luck you are : keaton henson

13. march : keaton henson

14. no witnesses : keaton henson

15. how could i have known : keaton henson

16. holy lover: keaton henson

17. alright : keaton henson

18. alps : novo amor, ed tullett

19. perth : bon iver

20. tyrants : catfish and the bottlemen

21. post break-up sex : the vaccines

22. wetsuit : the vaccines

23. collapse : vancouver sleep clinic

24. it’s alright : fractures

25. fall harder : fractures

26. budapest : george ezra

27. blame it on me : george ezra

28. lazy lover : lonely benson

29. clover : cold weather company

30. all we ever knew : the head and the heart

31. lost in my mind : the head and the heart

32. barcelona : george ezra

33. mess is mine : vance joy

34. only love : ben howard

35. ophelia : the lumineers

36. holocene : bon iver

37. bloom - bonus track : the paper kites

38. the cave : mumford and sons

39. rivers and roads : the head and the heart

40. dirty paws : of monsters and men

41. sleep on the floor : the lumineers

42. down in the valley : the head and the heart

43. like real people do : hozier

44. paint : the paper kites

45. stubborn love : the lumineers

46. tiger striped sky : roo panes

[crypticcorpse]

You bet your ass I'm going through these later as I recognize a lot, but not all. 👀

[crypticcorpse]

Fuck relationships.

[crypticcorpse]

Redesigned a character. I don't really like it, so I'll be selling them. I'll likely take just $10.

Toyhouse link: https://toyhou.se/5798793.tbn

[crypticcorpse]

Couple more comissions. I don't do coms often so sometimes they don't come out as I'd like :')

Icon for

Furry Amino is a community app where furries are welcome to express themselves!

Fullbody for

Furry Amino is a community app where furries are welcome to express themselves!

[leoreturns-deactivated20110811]

I have been waiting all year to post this.

[tumboner]

omg

[merspers]

This has been in my queue for months.

[mcgooglykins]

I missed it last year and I vowed that would NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

[thatsoundsprettynice]

YES

[xbstnmnr-deactivated20241116]

omg i didnt reblog this last year!

[crypticcorpse]

Finished Comission for someone on another site! Dm me if you'd like proof since this is a newer account, I'm too tired rn to grab all my links, but I'll dm screenshot proof if you'd feel obligated to know proof I drew it. My user in most places is DustyDeer.

Hope you enjoy this hella gay ship art

Im making dustydoodles my new art tag here

[burgerkapitany]

Springtime

[gara-asks-and-tags]

[crypticcorpse]

Hah. Fuck yea.

[crowleys-hips]

goddd you know what pisses me off about people who are like "i LOVE being trans! being trans is so cool! you should love being trans too! if you don't you're full of self hate and internalized transphobia haha im so inclusive! uwu" like good for you! but FUCK YOU. if you love being trans? good! you've achieved something great. but saying that everyone should is just downright disrespectful and ableist af and makes you reek of privilege. not everyone experiences the same level of dysphoria. some have way more dysphoria than others. that doesn't make them worse people. some people have the privilege to have a supportive family/community, and others aren't so lucky. that doesn't make them worse. some people are happy without a medical transition, and others would rather die without ever getting one. that still doesn't make them worse. some are happy with a medical transition and that's all it takes to lessen their struggles, some still struggle with dysphoria even after fully transitioning. and that still doesn't make them worse people and neither does it mean they're full of hate or internalized transphobia.

it just means we're all different people and have different points of view, different levels of dysphoria, privilege, and environments, but mostly: YOUR EXPERIENCES ARE NOT UNIVERSAL. stop blaming other trans people for feeling bad. it's bad enough already. you sound dumb and insensitive af and just like any neurotypical who loves telling others "just look on the bright side! it gets better!" sometimes it just doesn't. sometimes it's just not that easy. fuck you.

[crypticcorpse]

This post needs to be shared more if I'm being honest.

[stargazing-enby]

And that's that on that.

[stargazing-enby]

Apparently I wasn't done 🤔

[crypticcorpse]

Is this trauma?

I'm continuously circling the same memories over and over again with no end. Each waking hour being more painful when my mind decides to take its next trip there. It's like I'm stuck in a childs mind of my worst nightmares, but those nightmares would seem to simply be pleasant memories to others.

It hurts how much someone you once loved, has seemingly moved on so easy. Of course it may not have been easy for them, but it feels like it was. All those memories of how everything was great and everything was "perfect". Unaware of how I could have been effected after only trusting one single person. And by only one person, I mean I didn't even have trust in the people I've lived with all my life. It's painful and anxiety inducing even typing this.

Is this trauma?

It's been more than a year since last February and I'm still in this loop. How long is it considered grieving until someone may consider this trauma? Or is that how it even works?

I don't know what to do.

[myburdenalone]

[carnipallide]

These cute little opossums are now available as a sticker set on my RedBubble 

 ( this design can be found on many other products as well, enjoy ! ) 🍎

[princemeato]

[pawzart]

my hashtag six fanarts for twitter dot com