Through these Hazel Eyes

[cuteandquirky27]

I struggled a bit last night with my diet.  I should have gone to the gym, but I became so tired halfway through the day.  My husband had the holiday off from work, so we grabbed fancy sodas (Coke Zero, vanilla cream, and raspberry puree, I believe?), some beers at the local Maverik c-store, and made homemade pizza.  We DID make the pizza with a homemade wheat crust, turkey pepperoni, cheese, and pineapple, but it was that combined with liquid carbs, and some sugar later on that made the combo swerve toward the “bad” side.  I always feel AWFUL after consuming the “bad” stuff, and need to learn that once in awhile is OKAY.  It’s moderation that is the key word in this situation.  My guilt climbs through the roof and eats at me, sometimes worse than others.  I grabbed an office cookie for a snack today, but I did start the day with my Herbalife shake, snacked on a banana and natural almond butter, and will be consuming a baked sweet potato for lunch.  Dinner will include another Herbalife shake after cardio and strength at the gym, so I won’t be too hard on myself for the sugar slip.  Like I said before, we’re all human.  What’s important is that we learn to love ourselves for who we are inside, and I know this is much easier said than done considering I don’t think that way about myself either.  It’s a continuing battle.  

I purchased a book on Amazon on yesterday that I saw on a FB friend’s post that I will post on here and review as I go through it.  It arrives on Thursday, so stay tuned. :)  It’s regarding this very topic--learning to love yourself for who YOU are inside and out.

[veganfittv]

[cuteandquirky27]

One of my greatest obsessions--I’ve grown up with a love for raspberries and make them my go-to berry for my natural sugar and fiber intake.

[cosmopolitanmagazine]

[cuteandquirky27]

[cuteandquirky27]

For years I HATED this body I lived in. So I bounced back and forth between totally restricting myself and bingeing. . But when I stopped being at war...

I struggle tremendously with the way that I see myself.  It’s something that I’ve battled for years, for as long as I can remember, and it can get bad enough to make me breakdown emotionally, mentally, and physically, to the point of keeping me from enjoying special outings and moments in life with those closest to me year-round.  It doesn’t matter how many people compliment me and how nice their words truly are, it’s something that just can’t stick inside.  I adore the compliments and the smiles and confidence that they give me when they’re given, but they don’t truly change what I feel deep inside.  

Last night as I was slowing down the weekend for a relaxing evening prior to Monday’s arrival, I came upon this article as I was perusing my Facebook news feed.  I encourage you to read it in its entirety.  We are put under an enormous amount of stress and pressure from the media and society to become their image of the perfect body and the perfect life, that it can be almost impossible to do nothing but lose sight of reality and what really matters.  Read this article and follow her.  

[cuteandquirky27]

Breaking outside of the comfort zone

Sure, I’ve heard the term “blog” thrown around through time here and there, but I didn’t ever really think much of it.  It could have been on a movie, in music, through casual conversation, but that is basically the furthest extent that it ever reached for me.  I guess clicking on a random Pinterest article counts as part of this grouping, but it’s just something that hasn’t ever just “clicked” for me.  I’m not sure what to do with it exactly and where it’s going to take me, but I’ve decided that I’m going to give it a go.  

Maybe it’ll end up becoming more of an online diary of mine to talk myself through the hills and the valleys on this journey of mine, and maybe it won’t ever be seen by a single solitary soul in the online world.  Whatever it may be, I’m breaking out of that comfort zone that I try to stay well within and running with it. After all, I don’t think it’s quite common that you hear the captivating stories, the ones that make you think, the ones that teach you a lesson, the ones that you might just wish were a work of fiction that you read in a random novel that you picked up for two minutes at the local bookstore, by living within your comfort zone.

I might ramble, and I might share something that could potentially change your life (hopefully for the better, but hey--I’m not making promises--life happenes).  My goal is to not only chat about the things I encounter on this journey, things that you may or may not agree with on how I have handled them (and that’s okay), but to also make you think in times where you’re maybe at a standstill or just need to see that someone can relate to something that you might be going through.  YOU’RE NOT ALONE IN THIS WORLD.  

I lean a lot on my husband, my family, my friends, and God, so you’ll probably read and see references to them or images and/or quotes that I find along the way that inspire me to be a better person.  I’m not perfect--you’ll come to find out that I have many internal battles that I struggle with myself, but I think that’s what aids in empathy, and in showing that we’re all human; mistakes happen, and there are people in this world that can be your light in what seems like an endless black tunnel.

I’d say let’s say CHEERS to a beautiful start to a brand new week, but considering that wine, or any adult beverage consumption is frowned upon in my office environment (AND state for that matter, haha), I’ll just leave you with my hope and a prayers to a successful and cheery week ahead.  You know what?  If something happens that brings you down, don’t forget that it could always be worse, and it is going to be exactly what you make of it.  Learn to forgive, sometimes forget, and maybe YOU can be the light for someone else traveling their own dark tunnel.  Our world needs so much more light in its shadows, and it would benefit from you if you dared to make one little move to brighten yours and someone else’s day. Nothing is ever too small when it comes from the heart.

XO from the 801.

[itzdevyb123]

[cuteandquirky27]

So much truth.

[cuteandquirky27]

This is something that I need to remember when my willpower begins to weaken. Cravings come and go. They shouldn't be a reason to reverse all of the hard work I've put forth to progress through my journey.

[karmaversuslife]

Welcome to Fitblr - 7 things you F***ing need to know.

On a side note

I don’t know how to tell you this so that you’ll listen

maybe if I swear in the title. 

I want to take a quick moment (haha. Me. quick. HA!) to talk to the newbies. To the folks just starting out on this journey. To the people who have had enough… for real this time! 

The thing is, I’m going to tell you a bunch of things you already know and unless it is “for real this time” FOR REAL AND HONESTLY you are going to blink, stop reading this post half way through and move on to the quick-fix detox tea companies that post pictures of unrealistic “skinny” people and promise you a handful of lies. If that’s you, you aren’t for real this time. Good luck though and when you figure out that you aren’t going to lose 100 lbs in a week for that perfect chiseled beach look - come on back. We’ll be here. 

For those of us on the “for real this time” trail, there are some things I want to tell you and you’ve probably heard them a million times before, but maybe this time a lightbulb flickers over your head and you have a brilliant AHA! moment all because of me. Probably not, but maybe. And maybe you are sitting there wondering who the hell I am and how I can possibly tell you what to do. First, I am not telling you what to do. I am telling you things I know FOR ME. Do they apply to you also, Maybe! So who am I? I am just like you. My name is T. I am a blogger and a fitblr and a runner (ha!) and a swimmer (ha!) and a weight lifter (ha!) and a kickboxer (ha!) and a god-damn-zen-master (ha!) (or so I have been told - because here in my world, EFFORT IS EVERYTHING! I THINK THEREFORE I AM! I have nearly 500 followers which is breadcrumbs in the blogger world but HUGE to me and  much to my chagrin a bunch of them are porn blogs I can’t seem to make go away… sigh. My highest weight was 220 lbs. My current weight is 206 lbs. My body fat % has dropped from 45% to 40%. I have been working, steadily on my fitness for almost two years. When I started, I knew nothing. I was sore, tired, sick and lazy. I’ve been working on this for two years, and yeah, it got a bit easier, but I still have to work at it every single day and today when I woke up sore and achy and tired I knew I wanted to share this with you. 

Things the new-to-this need to know (or things the old-at-this needs to be reminded of): 

1. Don’t expect it to be easy - remember how I talked about quick fixes and detox teas. THEY ARE ALL LIES. This is not going to be easy, not even a little bit. Prepare yourself for hard, then expect harder. You’ll probably cry. You’ll probably quit. You’ll probably cry. Keep going. 

2. Don’t expect it to be easy - people are going to tell you all kinds of things. “I lost the weight and didn’t change my diet”. “Oh, I just woke up like this.” “Take this pill” “I don’t eat carbs” bla bla bla. People are going to downplay your effort and success. One of the hardest parts of your walk down this path is comparison. COMPARISON IS AN ASSHOLE. FUCK COMPARISON. YOU DO YOU. (I can’t make my capital letters any bigger…) YOU. DO. YOU. Everybody else has their own journey and 80% of them are going to lie to you because they don’t want you to know the before. YOU.DO.YOU. 

3. Don’t expect it to be easy - your body is going to tell you that you can’t do it. It is going to tell you that it is tired and sore and incapable. THAT IS NOT YOUR BODY. That is your brain. Your body is far more capable than you are giving it credit for and the first time you feel your body accomplish something you didn’t think it could accomplish will give you a type of confidence-boosting-euphoria you will never find in any fucking blueberry-acai-grapefruit-organic-detox-cup-of-overpriced-water-lies. Keep going. 

4. Don’t expect it to be easy - I bet you have a goal weight. You have a plan. You are going to do this this time because you have written it down on a piece of a paper and you are going to lose 20 lbs and you are going to look beautiful and you are going to be able to go onto a beach in a bathing suit and that person is going to notice you because you are really-really-ridiculously good looking now. Find that piece of paper. Got it? BURN IT! 

You are already really really ridiculously good looking. I know we say that all the time here at Fitblr Central and we are going to keep saying it until you also start saying it. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE GOOD LOOKING. YOU.DO.YOU AND THAT IS AMAZING! Own that shit! Flaunt that shit! 

You don’t need to lose 10-20-30 even 50 lbs. Oh? Your doctor said you need to for your BMI? Fuck the BMI. More bullshit. You don’t need to lose weight. YOU NEED TO BE HEALTHY! YOU NEED TO FEEL STRONG! (You may need to lose fat) but you 100% DO NOT need to lose weight. A lot of my posts are tagged with #duckthescale (an autocorrect faux pa I retained and use regularly) and I mean it. Fuck the scale. Who gives a shit what you weigh? BE STRONG! BE HAPPY! BE HEALTHY! BE FLEXIBLE! BE COURAGEOUS! BE KIND! BE CONFIDENT! BE A FIGHTER! BE NICE TO YOURSELF! Don’t make your goal your weight. please. You will end up disappointed. Focus on literally a million other things, not that useless number. 

Unlearn everything you thought you know. You KNOW  a lot of things. Dr. Oz. Oprah. Advertisement. Healthy and Beauty products. The people on that TV program with the catchy song and the spokes-person who looks like an angel; all of these people have taught you a lot of things. Forget them all. My favorite quote of the moment is: “I’m still learning. I’m still unlearning.” It is way harder to unlearn all the crap you’ve been “taught” than it is to learn the new stuff. 

5. Don’t expect it to be easy - you will need to wade through piles and piles and piles of overwhelming information. You will talk to hundreds of people who offer you advice (good) and advice (bad) and opinions (both warranted and un-requested). You will need to learn which advice is worth listening to. Here’s a tip: most of it isn’t. Read. Research. Talk to professionals. Talk to people in community groups and social media who can help (be careful who you listen to). Find people you trust and trust your instincts and don’t expect it to be easy. Find what works for you. You’ll get there.  

6. Don’t expect it to be easy - go slow. Don’t start out at 400 horsepower straight out of the gate. You’ll just break something. Take it slow. If it means you spend the first 2 weeks at the gym walking on the treadmill doing a weird book-reading juggling act while trying to secretly spy on all the gym goers using the equipment so you can hopefully figure out what this shit show is all about (true story) then do that. Just go slow. The Rock once said “for the first (enter timeline) I just went to the gym, sat there, and read a magazine. It’s about building the habit” (not his exact words but you get the idea) That really stuck with me. Build the habit however you need to. Remember: you.do.you.

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER:

7. Don’t expect it to be easy - BE KIND TO YOURSELF. This may be the hardest thing you do. Forgive yourself. Recommit every morning if you have to. If you take 5 steps today, take 6 steps tomorrow. If you skip a day, start again tomorrow. Be patient. Work hard, always. Love yourself first and please please please be KIND to yourself always.