i yap a lot

hi! this blog is a dumping ground for my random musings, my art, and just anything and everything

[jailrotting]

hello guys my name is Markiplier

[shadowhunterandwizard]

Y’all I’m screaming

[cyborgstomachstuff]

I THINK BLOND WAR ACADEMY DUDE AND STAR FLEET ACADEMY KINGON DUDE R GONNA FALL IN LOVE

OMG YAOI IN MY STAR TREK

Based completely on a 10 second interaction. The cutest couple 🥹

[homunculus-argument]

Fun fact: if you, as an adult, tell miserable children that their youth is the best that life will ever be, and that it's all just downhill from there, there's a percentage of them who will hear this and think "well, I guess I better kill myself before that happens." And a certain percentage of those will proceed to do that and succeed.

Anyway what I'm saying is that any time you feel tempted to say that, you should instead consider shutting the fuck up. Just because you peaked at 16 doesn't mean anyone else did. Most peoples' lives get better than that.

[cyborgstomachstuff]

People who say they peaked in middle/high school are red flags. Our brain weren't even fully developed. We were silly goofy in a baaaaad way

[theconcealedweapon]

[jessepinwheel]

there’s a thing I think about sometimes when I’m writing that I call ‘the rabies condition’

by which I mean: there are no contraindications to getting the rabies vaccine for post-exposure prophylaxis.

every other vaccine usually has a few contraindications like ‘don’t take this if you’re allergic to it’ or ‘if you’re pregnant discuss the risks and benefits with your doctor’ or ‘don’t give to children below age 6′ or something, but not the rabies vaccine. if you’ve been exposed to rabies, there is literally no medical reason that can justify not getting the rabies vaccine–you can be deadly allergic to literally every single ingredient and the correct decision is still to administer the vaccine, because if you don’t, you’re 100% guaranteed to die of rabies. even the life-threatening allergies are a step up in survival rate (especially since anaphylaxis is something that can be managed, even if there are risks associated with it)

which is to say, the rabies condition: if a character has been ‘exposed to rabies’, aka, in some impending absolute worst-case scenario, like the apocalypse or some death curse or the destruction of their entire city via demons or whatever, then that character has to take action and the consequences and risks no longer matter, because literally any other outcome would be better, and 1% chance of survival is still better than 0%. that doesn’t make those actions necessarily good, the same way that injecting yourself with something you know you’re deadly allergic not a good thing to do, but it’s still better than dying horrifically of rabies. desperate times and desperate measures etc

and then, after your character’s prevented some horrible thing by doing some almost equally bad thing, they should absolutely experience the consequences of those choices.

[cyborgstomachstuff]

Watching X Files episode "Young at Heart", and I studied the process of aging in genetics and have paused this episode several times to discuss the "science" in this episode with my parents.

The predominant theory of aging is that telomeric shortening causes cell damage and senescence in cells which is associated with aging, cancer, and a higher risk of death. Kids with progeria have a mutation in the protein lamin A and have shorter telomeres in fibroblasts.

https://read.houstonmethodist.org/cellular-anti-aging-therapy

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19428457/

So this episode proposes that a scientist has figured out something on the cellular and genetic level to reverse aging except in the eyes. I'm assuming the telomeres. But why not the eye? Maybe because the eyes are immunologically isolated?

I proposed that theory to my dad, and he goes "Could be. Good enough for a sci-fi show anyway."

My dad is a Dr and my mom is a music teacher. She just rolled her eyes at us and told me to pee play.

[cyborgstomachstuff]

I will never stop the Mulder slander.

I love him, but the number of times he gets hit over the head is ridiculous like sir you work in the FBI, you should know better.

I also enjoy rage baiting my dad by saying he's bad at his job lmao it's so fun

[bbnotumbl]

[cyborgstomachstuff]

People keep interrupting my bath and yaoi time, I'm about to lose my mind

[byjove]

If I see a company advertising with AI, it makes me lose trust in them and the services and goods they supply. If you’re too slimy and cheap to hire a voice actor for a 15 second ad or an artist to design promotional graphics, what other corners are you cutting? There was a nurse posting pictures of the AI generated advertisement his hospital posted everywhere and he was pointing out the errors in the image like the stethoscope having two sets of earpieces and the doctor’s fingers being wrong. I think if I walked into a hospital and saw that bullshit I’d be like “They’re charging me $80k for this procedure and not paying advertising people to do their job. Are they paying custodians to do their job? What else are they cheaping out on and could it be something that kills me?”

[cyborgstomachstuff]

Does anyone else on antidepressants feel your feelings locked deep inside your chest?

Wanting to break free like a caged animal right behind your sternum, burning and rolling with nowhere to go, climbing up into your throat but unable to escape in a shattering screech of emotions and turmoil, pushing against the backs of your eyes but unable to liquidize and pour down your cheeks?

Do you also feel like you lost the ability to express the worst of your emotions, like you can't even conjure up an expression and your face is devoid of feeling

Or is this unrelated to my antidepressants and a bigger sigh of something else going on?

At least I'm cute to distract from the menty B's 😘

[cyborgstomachstuff]

We got to the episode of DS9 where one of my fav couples gets together (Leeta and Ron, they're so cutie, I love sm) and I'm trying to convince my mom that DS9 is better than the Hallmark channel. I'm right

[cyborgstomachstuff]

My household has a tradition now called "TV show and Drug Time".

My medicine routine takes place at 6:00 every evening and takes about 40 mins to an hr. I have to set up clear tube feeds, crush and dissolve pills, measure liquid meds, flush water, do a syringe of meds, flush water, do a syringe of meds, recover from the sudden onslaught of meds in my intestines, and the start tube feeds. Since it's long and tedious but doesn't take much brain power, it's perfect for throwing on a TV show I'm the background. And it's fits almost perfectly within the time frame of most TV show episode run times. So, TV Show and Drug Time.

For a good year or so, it was X Files and Drug Time. Currently it's DS9 and Drug Time.

I'm rewatching DS9 with my parents, and we watched it together as a family like 10 yrs ago when I was in middle school and early high school. Well, I am discovering more and more episodes that they WATCHED WITHOUT ME when I was at swim practice as a young child! DS9 and Drug Time has become DS9 and Heartbreak.

[theattractiveshrub]

What is it with parents and WATCHING DS9 WITHOUT THEIR OFFSPRING!!! (My mom watched the episode where Odo kills the changeling and didn't tell me or my dad about it)

[cyborgstomachstuff]

OMG NO! UNFORGIVABLE

[cyborgstomachstuff]

My household has a tradition now called "TV show and Drug Time".

My medicine routine takes place at 6:00 every evening and takes about 40 mins to an hr. I have to set up clear tube feeds, crush and dissolve pills, measure liquid meds, flush water, do a syringe of meds, flush water, do a syringe of meds, recover from the sudden onslaught of meds in my intestines, and then start tube feeds. Since it's long and tedious but doesn't take much brain power, it's perfect for throwing on a TV show in the background. And it fits almost perfectly within the time frame of most TV show episode run times. So, TV Show and Drug Time.

For a good year or so, it was X Files and Drug Time. Currently it's DS9 and Drug Time.

I'm rewatching DS9 with my parents, and we watched it together as a family like 10 yrs ago when I was in middle school and early high school. Well, I am discovering more and more episodes that they WATCHED WITHOUT ME when I was at swim practice as a young child! DS9 and Drug Time has become DS9 and Heartbreak.

[cyborgstomachstuff]

I have discovered submarines are shaped like suppositories.

[queenofthefaces]

[savastasia]

How are disabled and interracial illegal???

[anarchohellenism]

Interracial marriage was outlawed for the longest time, and disabled people lose government benefits when they get married so they cannot have reassurance that they will continue to LIVE if they get married.

[rxbiteme]

Story time: my mom is white, dad is black. They’ve been together twenty four years, married for twenty three. When my parents were dating they did it on the low TO KEEP MY DAD SAFE.

My mom’s parents said “We don’t care who you love.” At that point she’d only ever brought home white guys. She brought my dad home-her mother called her a nigger lover and damned the relationship as much as possible. Her father grew around his prejudices after I was born but never apologized, just wasn’t a blatant fuck.

The day she introduced my father to her family was the last time she spoke to her mother for over twenty years. When I was getting sick and she called and asked her mother and grandmother if anyone in the family had anything strange happen similar what I was going through they told her “it’s because you married a black man. You made your bed, you lie in it.”

Cops pulled them over all the time and asked my mom IF SHE WAS OKAY AND IF SHE NEEDED HELP BECAUSE MY FATHER-A BLACK MAN-WAS DRIVING A 100 POUND WHITE WOMAN AROUND. HE WAS HARRASSED AND THREATED WITH ARREST.

My father ended up getting into a fight in self defence because some entitled hick decided he didn’t like seeing a black man and white woman in the bar together. Thankfully other patrons helped my father but he still couldn’t go to the er for his injuries. My mom patched him up and they were terrified the cops would take him away.

THEIR BEST FRIEND GOT LICENSED TO MARRY THEM SO THEY COULD ACTUALLY TIE THE KNOT BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE WOULD AND CITED JIM CROW ERA LAW AS TO WHY.

When shopping with just me my father wouldn’t hold my hand if there was a group around. Why? I’m far lighter than him and people had stopped and asked him “whose child is that?” Or “little girl where’s your parents?” and were stunned when I grinned and pointed at my dad and proudly proclaimed “my daddy’s right here.” You know where else mixed kids couldn’t hold their parents hands? Apartheid South Africa. We live in fucking FLORIDA.

So yeah. Some history for you.

[kari-izumi]

This post was made in October 2018. The above poster’s parents met in 1994. We were a generation removed from the Civil Rights movement and this was happening.

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I’m Disabled.

Before applying for the federal program SSDI, we married. This was to prevent losing the life-saving insurance I needed. At that point, I was still on my parents’ insurance, but would soon age out of being able to use it.

After we married, I applied for SSDI, which takes about two years. Everyone is denied by default, so I was prepared with an SSDI lawyer (they only take the case if they know they can win, and their payment is a very small portion of your backpay; my lawyer was paid just 15% of my backpay)backpack. When the rejection letter arrived, I immediately went to her for help.

I inquired about the state program SSI. She told me I didn’t qualify because I’m married. I applied anyway, because I ad nothing to lose. Here’s what the person at the SSI office told me I would have to do before I could apply:

I need to divorce my husband.

I need to live alone. We could not be living together because this would be seen as us basically being married.

I need to have less than $2k to my name at all times.

I cannot work.

I cannot live with my parents because their income would count against me.

I cannot own expensive things that could be sold for money.

If I was approved, I would have to continue following these rules with a few additions.

I cannot receive gifts of money.

I must have a bank account, and they would monitor it to make sure I never went even a single cent over $2000.

I cannot have a savings account.

I cannot have a safety deposit box.

I would have to continue living alone.

They can stop by my home at anytime to inspect how I’m living. They could talk to my neighbors to see if I had anyone who visited and helped me as more than just a friend. This means I could not have my former husband turned boyfriend stay overnight, and he cannot be perceived as taking care of me.

I cannot have anyone help me financially. This means no one else can pay my bills. If I cannot afford those bills on my own, I would have to apply for programs that would. Most of those have long waiting lists, like section 8 housing (we had applied for section 8 housing in 2008, and three years ago I received an email telling me we qualified. They had only the information we gave them in 2008, and have since moved across the country).

My SSDI, if approved, would count against me financially.

The most money I would receive from SSI, if I did everything they demanded and was approved, was $618/month.

This is enforced poverty. It’s also the onky way may of those Disabled would be able to receive the medical care that keeps them alive, like Medicaid. My seizure medication used to cost nearly $2k/month. My neurologist gave me free samples of it every month and helped me apply for free medication through the manufacturer’s financial aid program (you should too if you can’t afford your medication). I was receiving medical care through the hospital’s financial aid program when I married and lost my parents’ insurance coverage.

I refused to do as SSI demanded. My SSDI lawyer was, in fact, relieved when I told her I’m married. Why? Because marrying afterwards would have caused serious and life-threatening complications. She encourages everyone who applies for SSDI to marry if it’s possible a ble for them to do so. Because of her, I was approved for other programs, things I didn’t even know existed, but for two years, it was Hell-on-Earth. I couldn’t work because it would count against me. At that time, rent was $650, but my husband was making federal minimum wage, worked full time, and his employer kept changing his schedule, which made it impossible to apply for a second job.

I know many who are on SSI and need it in order to remain alive. One of my friends nearly fell out if the program because a nosy neighbor saw her and her boyfriend cuddling in her couch watching a movie. They assumed he was secretly living with her. Said neighbor was frequently seen just outside my friend’s windows, watching her. When she met my lawyer after getting the automatic SSDI rejection, she married, got into the programs I had been in, and filed a restraining order against her neighbor because my lawyer absolutely insisted on it. The bitch violated the terms three times and was put in prison for six months. She’s now on SSDI, married, and much happier.

Marriage equality does not exist until the Disabled can marry without losing everything.