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My hearts a fire 

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Chill

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Grandparents, mom and uncle #family

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This is a picture of rain coming down on a sunny day

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He missed his appointment.

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Teamwork yo! #strength #ants

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The other side now ....#butterfly #beautiful #love

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Butterflies make it better #butterfly #sun #light #beautiful #green

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Too many

I think too many people don’t even know what love is. I think they think they do and wish with all of their tired hearts, but they don’t really know. I don't know what I expected to change. I sure didn't think any prayers would help, or wishing on a star. After a while I became accustomed to preparing for the worst but I didn't let anyone know I thought that way. I kept an upbeat appearance, and if anyone ever made any comments like “oh you look sad” or “Oh whats wrong ? “ I tried even harder to smile.

She got to school early, and carried a jean purse, a heavy back pack and a an orange duffle bag of books mostly. She used to read so much in those days. There was nothing in those bags that she really needed. Having all of her belongings with her was comforting somehow. She never liked being at the shelters and didn't want anyone to know she was there and maybe leaving her things there while she was at school was too much to take. She carried everything with her. This girl also never knew when it would be time to leave, so she was always prepared. On this particular morning the bags got too heavy, so she set her things down on a brick wall outside of her elementary school. She sat and waited for the bell to ring. She never made eye contact with anyone and didn't want to draw attention to herself but always hoped someone would talk to her, she was awfully lonely. 

She noticed him kind of hovering around her, and he made some sort of comment like “hey “ or something and before she could respond, happy that she wasn't invisible today he started to laugh and point. He announced to the school yard that she had a toothbrush in her purse and waved it in the air like trophy. All the kids started to laugh and made jokes about how bad her breath must be to have to carry a toothbrush around. They didn't know how disgusting those shelters were, they didn't know how it made her feel safe having that stupid fucking toothbrush in her bag. She acted like she didn't care and didn't hear them. It was bad enough that she was currently being humiliated, she wasn't about to let them know how much it hurt. It may not have been so bad if she would have had something to fall back on, but when she looked behind her there was nothing there. Being so young, it is a scary thing to feel that unsafe, but that was life, and more storm clouds swirled ahead. 

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Abnormal M&M #oddduck #outcast #weirdo

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My mother is too cute ! what the hell is matcha tea anyway? #matcha #greentea

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Mantis summer

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Montana

I was relieved when you left that day I really didn't know why you stayed as long as you had. They sell beer in all 50 states, It won't be me at those pearly gates. There were times when I know you were lying, But I only let it go cause I didn't need to hear the truth, I already knew.

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Michigan

Every now and then I think of you But you know it was just easier with you gone, Thousands of miles makes choosing easy, I was able to face the dawn. But sometimes when things get lonely, I look at old pictures of you, Thousands of miles make choosing easy, But I'll never be done loving you. I wonder sometimes if we could of made it work, I wonder why I let you on that plane, I guess I didn't have any faith back then, But this thinking of you drives me insane. Oh thousands of miles can make choosing easy, When you don't know what you want, If I made a mistake, Now it's too late, To get back to where we were.... You should know I want you happy, Even more so than myself, And even though I told you to go, I still feel like you put me on a shelf.

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I'm disgusted with this fucking day.

That's it.

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29 year old female... Heroin dependence continuos use

For what it's worth I want you to stop using. I don't want to give you all of those reasons of how it's affecting me, or anybody else. I just really want you to know what it's like to be free cause I think you'd really love it, and I think you deserve it. There's something a person needs to get sober, an inner drive, some intangible human force, unrelenting determination I guess. I wish I could give you the force needed to get well, or help you find it, but I can't. So for what's it's worth I want you well, I want to know you again. For what it's worth I'm sorry I didn't pick you up that night you asked for a ride home from that party; I thought I was teaching you a lesson, maybe I did. For what it's worth and I know it isn't much at all, I love you.

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Vodka, lemon juice, pineapples and pineapple juice, and sprite over ice ... Yummy #drinks #vodka #dayoff

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Tiny bucket...