Dad-isms: Things I've Learned So Far

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[dad-isms]

If you believe you’re miserable, you are.

If you believe you’re happy, you are.

😉

[dad-isms]

“If I don’t write my goals down, I won’t have to deal with the failure of not having completed them. Who wants to read something every day knowing there’s little to no chance that my life will be any different than it’s going to be, with or without them”?

- The 98%

[dad-isms]

[dad-isms]

[dad-isms]

[dad-isms]

If he can physically hold you, but not emotionally embrace you, than you are better off alone. The right one can do both.

- Dad

[dad-isms]

You’re going to meet these people that need to be saved.  Be careful.  Their fire, their passion, their tough life circumstances (or choices) will make you believe...time with a stable person (like you) could fix things (and them).  Walk away.  It won’t work.  It never will.  They have to want to fix themselves.  All of that passion?  It can easily be turned against you in passionate, constant fighting.  I’ve told you a million times, but it’s so hard to accept, boring is ideal.  Especially after 10 or 20 years.  Not too high, not too low.  That will be your ideal match.  Fire, it’ll burn.

- Dad 

[dad-isms]

Your soul mate will look at you in a completely different way too.  When you feel it, you’ll know.  It isn’t to manipulate you, but to love you.

The way he asks you about your day is even different. 

In the beginning, there is no hesitation at all.  Imagine a fireman who was wishy-washy about saving a family in a burning house?  Your soul mate is the one rushing in, no holdbacks, no hesitation, just running towards.  Towards.  He knows exactly what he is doing in being with you because he is on a mission to do so.  

Find a man with this kind of purpose.  Draw to him.  If he flinches...he’s not the one.

- Dad

[dad-isms]

If you failed, you tried. Win.

- Dad

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Sex within the first two weeks will make you stay with someone who wouldn’t make it 8-12 weeks without it.

- Dad

[dad-isms]

[dad-isms]

“Be responsive, but not too responsive”. When you are with the right one, you don’t worry, you don’t second-guess. You just act, when you want, how you want, and they accept you. It’s not a fairy tale, it’s just how it works.

- Dad

[dad-isms]

Everyone knows they are supposed to fall in love with their best friend, but the draw to alpha’s, female or male, is often too strong to avoid.

Here’s the truth:

1.  Alpha’s, in the traditional sense, don’t want to attach themselves to anyone...for very long.  They are constantly looking over your shoulder for the next thing, constantly checking their phones or inconspicuously not checking them at all.

2.  Alpha’s have the highest divorce rate - period.  See #1.  You can’t change or fix these people.  They have an insatiable desire to win things over, then discard.  Win, discard.  This is their formula.

3.  Real alpha’s are the kind male or females that you probably put in the ‘friend’ zone.  Too nice, too sensitive, too giving...too.  This actually takes more guts than the one with the strong jaw-line or perfect silhouette that avoids your messages and calls for hours (or days).  These nice ones actually take the risk of getting their hearts smashed into a thousand pieces, the faux alphas keep a wall around their hearts, because deep down, they’ll never love anyone more than themselves.  

“But Dad, nice guys aren’t very fun, they aren’t really a challenge...”.  It depends on what you want to “ride” I guess?  A roller coaster or a merry-go-round.  I don’t have to tell you which one eventually makes you sick.  “Having fun” for a bunch of years and then waiting until you are 25-30 years old to settle down will severely narrow the field.  Remember the alpha’s forumla:  win, discard.  Good guys and girls settle down and marry other good guys and girls, this is called maturity and discernment.  

How many faux alphas do you see walking around the mall or down the beach holding their wives or husbands hand after ten years?  Arm candy comes with a high price.

- Dad

[dad-isms]

Soul mates don’t stutter when speaking of the future.

[dad-isms]

Figure out exactly what you want and then accept nothing less. - Dad

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If her friends don’t like you, more than likely, she won’t eventually.

[dad-isms]

Forgiveness isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice