Kneel.
Lately I’ve been finding myself randomly thrown into space. Not absentmindedly zoning off, but immersed in to the confines of the darkest and most intimate part of my mind. Somewhere I haven’t been in a very long time. Sub space. It’s like nothing you can imagine. I need to be lead and molded. I need to feel the intensity that comes and goes in waves like crashing seas on the beach. I need to be used, tortured, tempted, pushed and pulled. Hurt and loved. I need to feel. Its the difference between being here, and being alive.
This life that I’ve lead for 28 years I’ve had so many more downs than ups that I become numb to things around me. There’s so many times I want to say the hell with it all and leave this former shell of a life behind me and run away to be what I believe is free. This intensity and mentality is my escape.
When he’s giving me what I crave and what the deepest parts of my soul desires I feel complete. I feel as though all that exists in this entire universe is the need to make his needs my own. For then I know that I have a purpose. I know that this is my reason, I am His to love, cherish and use in whatever way He believes is best. His pleasure, is my pleasure. Not many understand this life.. But to be a part of something so amazing and beautifully intense, you could never imagine the peace that comes with it. I have never been more free than I am since I’ve belonged to Him. I’ve given myself wholly to Him. My heart, mind, body and soul are His. This was a choice made of my own free will because I trust Him. I love him. I need him. I desire him. I am his and he is mine. We belong to each other. You will never find a love like the love of a submissive to her Dominant. As a submissive I look to Him to lead me through life. He is the one to free me. He is the one to make me feel alive again after the world has made me so cold.
This is why he urges me to kneel, and I do so.
Jamie
Shared from a friend...couldn't have said it better myself
