Patriarch

{indie scott mitchell from jurassic world. please read rules before interacting. written by emma}

[dadiisms-blog]

Hey guys! I’ve been trying to get to those starters for a couple days lately, but I just haven’t had the muse. I’m working on it, but don’t give up on me! <3

[hippyhoppus-deactivated20150728]

Kinda wanna cuddle you kinda wanna fuck you against the wall

[zachmitchxll-archive]

Zach just let himself be encompassed by the comforting, if a little too tight, hug offered to him in the quiet of the plane cabin. He could feel sleep fully tugging at him now, and further words of encouragement only made him want to curl up and pass out for five years even more. Thinking about it now, Zach wished he’d been far less of an irritable, emotion-loathing teen over the last few years - he missed how close he had been with his father. A sleepy sort of smile overtook the pinched expression of fear on his face, lips twitched slightly upwards in response to the familiar (rather embarrassing) childhood nickname. He nodded softly, half-nuzzling the side of his face into the worn, comforting and slightly itchy fabric of his dad’s sweater. He almost lost this - lost everything. And that was terrifying to think about. He flinched briefly from the tap - mildly regretting his quiet admission from the reaction he garnered (he hated making his parents worry, hated making them feel anything negative because of his own faults and problems), and reluctantly raised his gaze from the opposite side of the cabin, to the dark brown of his dad’s. “O-kay dad. Okay.” He’s ashamed to admit he’s not entirely sure he believes the promises - a little ball of guilt sitting heavy in his chest at the thought, but it’s borne from countless over heard arguments. He just hopes he’s wrong this time. With a heavy, soft, sigh, Zach settled back down, more than ready to slip into a coma - for all he cared, life could keep moving around him.

[dadiisms-blog]

“Good,” he murmured, leaning back against the seat and taking a deep breath, letting it out slowly through his nose. There was something to be said simply for the security of knowing his kid was safe, of being able to hold him in his arms. Maybe he could stop worrying for a couple hours and get some sleep. But who was he kidding, he was a dad, it was his job to worry about his kids. But before he knew it, he had drifted off, body too exhausted to function anymore.

He woke just as the sun came up, the captain turning back on the seatbelt sign as the hostesses moved up and down with the tea and coffee cart. He yawned a little, leaning back and staring out at the sunrise, allowing himself to wake up slow. He’d just let Zach sleep as long as he wanted-- he’d be awake before they got off the plane.

[dadiisms-blog]

Starter call.

[dadiisms-blog]

Starter call.

[zachmitchxll-archive]

In the face of disapproval, Zach just ramped up the amount of puppy-dog eyes he leveled at his dad, bottom lip jutting just a little out in a sad pout. He wasn’t above cute faces to get his way, and his dad was a total pushover for them. “But-but! I didn’t ruin any of the flowers, she can’t be that mad! I just… I didn’t mean to…”

[dadiisms-blog]

Scott never could resist those damned puppy dog eyes. Sighing, he placed a hand on his hip and shifted his weight, shaking his head. “You really know what you’re doing, kid, I’ll give you that,” he said, taking a few steps towards the child and holding out his arms. “C’mon, let’s go get you cleaned up, Zach-attack. I’ll handle your mother. Just don’t do this again, ya got me?”

[zachmitchxll-archive]

Zach felt a little of him give inside, his tensed muscles finally relaxing into the comforting embrace his dad had urged him into - exhaustion catching up to him in one fell swoop and he didn’t have the fight to keep it at bay any longer. Curled as close as he was, he realized how much he’d missed just letting go and being affectionate with his dad, since his teen years began it’d been more and more embarrassing in his mind to be seen like that. Now? After being so close to never seeing either of his parents again? Zach stopped caring. He wasn’t letting them out of his sight. Expression finally cleared of the taut stress, his features settled into a sad sort of smile - emotions shot from the open pride in his dad’s voice. Never again was he doing that stereotypical teenage bullshit where he acted as if he hated them. His parents were his life, and without them… he didn’t know what he’d do. Nor did he want to think about what would happen to them, if he died. God, if he and Gray had died? That would be the final nail in the coffin between them, wouldn’t it. Divorce full steam ahead, what else was left for them to wanna share?  “’m sorry… I was scared too.” He admitted, quietly - so soft, if he hadn’t had his face pressed up against his dad’s chest, it wouldn’t have been heard. “I love you, dad.” Zach added as he tucked his over-long legs between the seat in front and the side of the plane, body curled tightly in on itself. “Don’t leave, okay?” And whether he meant the plane seat… or their lives as a whole, he wasn’t sure even he could say for sure.

[dadiisms-blog]

An approving smile floated across exhausted features as Zach relaxed into his embrace. He’d missed the familiarity between them, it had hurt a little when his kid had suddenly turned into a sullen teenager and started refusing contact with him. He could barely be in the same room with the kid lately, without him retreating to the farthest corner of the room and sulking. He nudged the kid lightly with an elbow. “I can feel the wheels turning from here, kid.  Shut it down, Zach-attack. You need to sleep,” at the tiny admission, his heart ached for his son, trying to pull him as close as possible. He wanted nothing more than to shield him from the world, to keep him safe from everything that caused him pain. He sighed wearily, settling comfortably against the back of the seat. “I love you too, kiddo. More than anything, you know that, right?” he lifted his arm for a moment, allowing his son to adjust his position until he was comfortable. The last question took his breath away, drawing a harsh intake of breath from him-- it felt like a  punch to the gut. “Zachary Levi, you look at me. Hey,” he tapped the kid’s cheek lightly until he was rewarded with a pair of tired eyes. “I promise that’s not gonna happen, okay? I’m not leaving. I know there have been some problems lately, but... we’re gonna get through this, okay? You don’t need to worry about that. Now get some sleep.” he ordered firmly, kissing his forehead.

[dadiisms-blog]

"I just wanna be your friend."

A roguish smile played at his lips. “Well, I’d like that just fine, I think.”

[zachmitchxll-archive]

Always the same old dad, but he couldn’t find it in himself to actually react to the mild warning - not the hiss he normally had the energy to return. It was just too much, at the end of the day. His barriers were slipping, and his mood was so low, it was a wonder he could even think of the words to say. Zach stuttered a little, shuddered under the press of his dad’s hand at his shoulder - proud. He’d said he was proud. He didn’t deserve it, had almost got Gray killed so many times. Zach would never feel like he deserved it, he knew that deep down. But he was grateful to hear it nevertheless. God he’d been so stupid, taking them off road thinking he was being cocky, being a good brother by showing Gray cool new things. That small ball of self-loathing would never sit lighter in his chest. “Yeah.” Is all he says in the end, weak and soft, empty. He resisted at the tug for a few moments, scanned the plane for anyone actually awake - just the stewards and stewardess’, no one that’d judge him for it. So he caved, grumbling all the way, and settled his his head propped against his dad’s shoulder, tucked neatly under his chin. Like he used to when he was younger, little and craving affection.

[dadiisms-blog]

It spoke volumes to him, the lack of his son’s normal response to his quiet reprimand. The kid looked so down in the dumps he was surprised he could still sit upright. “It’s okay, son,” he said kindly, giving a half smile, eyes crinkling at the edges. “It’s alright,” he repeated quietly, sensing further shift in Zach’s mood, adding firmer pressure to the hand on the skinny shoulder. An approving hum left his throat as the kid moved closer to him, lifting his chin automatically to accommodate. He shifted closer, using a hand to raise the armrest in order to give Zach more room. He wrapped an arm around his shoulders, tucking him neatly against his body and wrapping him tighter in the blanket with his free hand. There was an inherent comfort in the simple act, the act of knowing that his kid was safe in his arms-- alive. He rested his chin on the soft hair, sighing heavily. “I almost lost you kid,” he couldn’t keep the slight quaver out of his voice. “Y’had me good and scared for a minute. I’m just glad you’re here... and not...” he licked his lips, holding his son a little tighter against him. “Get some sleep, bud,” he muttered, rubbing a hand up and down a skinny arm.

[dadiisms-blog]

If i owe, let me know please! Also, in a related note, if you recently followed and want a starter you should like this post. I’ll get to them tomorrow, since I’m heading to sleep now.

[ofmotherly]

contacts — scott m. dadiisms [text.] you say ‘good morning’ at 6, or 7 not 3 am [text.] I don’t know about tonight – I have to talk to my sister about something and it’s gonna take a while,

[dadiisms-blog]

[text:] i’m sorry if that offended you, i was just trying to do something nice for you, and i was already awake to say it, so

[text:] oh. alright then, do you wanna do it tomorrow, maybe? instead? I need to see you, Karen. I miss you, we haven’t seen each other in like... two days. I’m dying, here. I miss my beautiful girlfriend with the amazing smile and the best sense of humor.

[dadiisms-blog]

Random lyrics sentence starters

"Nothing is perfect, but your imperfections are quaint."

"Your love is worth it and for that I will wait."

"I drive you crazy, but you always return."

"Although you love me, sometimes you're mean."

"Things can get ugly, but we're still a team."

"I'm all yours."

"Maybe I'm just being selfish."

"I've got your hand, it's us against consensus."

"And I will burn the people who hurt you the worst."

"I'll protect you 'till the day I'll meet my maker."

"Don't fight me now 'cause you might need me later."

"I wanna see your eyes."

"So why'd you have to go?"

"I'm still trying to wake up from this nightmare."

"One more night alone I'll go insane."

"This is what I live for."

"Selfish, taking what I want and call it mine."

"I'm head of the class. I'm popular."

"Being attractive is the most important thing there is."

"I'll never get caught."

"Every boy in the whole world could be yours!"

"If I stumble, they're gonna eat me alive."

"Hard to be soft. Tough to be tender."

"If my life is mine, what shouldn't I do?"

"I just wanna be your friend."

"Is it ever gonna be enough?"

"I just wanna be your friend, why you givin' me a hard time?"

"I'm sorry for everything I've done."

"I can't have you and I'm only gonna do you wrong."

"I'm going to mess this up."

"From the second that I was born it seems I had a loaded gun, and then I shot a hole through everything I loved."

"There's always time to change your mind."

"I've got nothing left to live for."

"I know your type. You're all the same."

"In the beginning you intrigue, but the way you move, it terrifies me."

"You remind me of the things that I don't need."

"I'm kinda curious. Oh no, you got me already."

"We both know that it's over."

"You're talking like a stranger, so I don't know what to do."

"I'm callous and I'm cruel, to everyone but you."

"It's been awhile since I stared at the stars."

"You said that you'd always love me."

"Well I don't think that it's the end, but I know we can't keep going."

"Say what you mean and it turns to a fight."

"Chasing your dreams since the violent 5th grade."

"Trying to believe in your silent own way."

"Cause we'll be okay. I'm not going away."

"How many of our parents seem to make it anyway?"

"Headed to a red carpet, they won't know my name."

"Trying to find a way down the road we don't know."

"I'm gonna find my way back to your side."

"What if I said I would break your heart?"

"I just may be too crazy to love."

"Don't you think I was too young too be messed with?"

"I should've known."

"Maybe it’s me and my blind optimism to blame."

"I'll look back in regret how I ignored when they said, 'Run as fast as you can.'"

"You are an expert at 'sorry.'"

"I’m shining like fireworks over your sad empty town."

"Miss you terribly already."

"Miss your small hands in the palm of mine."

"I hope for your life, you forget about mine."

"Please forget me. You were right, dear, I am cold and self-involved."

"I'll write my loneliness in poems, if I can just think how to start."

"You want your independence, but you won't let me let you go."

"You think that you're the sun. The whole world revolves around you."

"I would wait a lifetime. I will wait for you."

"I don't care. I'm down for what you want."

"If we're talking body, you got a perfect one. So put it on me."

"Bite me while I taste your fingertips."

"You and I don't work out."

"We should just end it now before someone gets more hurt than they have to."

"Before I ever met you, I never knew that my heart could love so hard."

"Before I ever met you, I never knew that I liked to be kissed for days."

"Before I ever met you, I never knew I could be broken in so many ways."

"I miss you more than I thought I would."

"I found love where it wasn't supposed to be, right in front of me."

"Talk some sense to me."

"I wanna feel your touch."

"Pretending is not enough. I wanna feel us together."

"Just one last time again."

"You are the trouble I'm in."

"Puts herself on the front lines with no reward and takes care everyone else before herself."

"Thinks he takes her for granted but to her surprise, he needs her more than she needs him."

"She's not just another face."

"He acts like it's nothing but we all know the truth."

"It is about that she acquired someone who knows she's not a fool."

"I couldn't decide if you were the most annoying human being I'd ever met or just the best thing that ever happened."

"I made up my mind to just go with it."

"What's the worst thing that could happen?"

"We're not forever you're not the one."

"You and I could be the best thing ever."

"We're not happily ever after. We don't got what it takes."

"I shut the door and I don't look back."

"You still got me around your finger."

"Please don't fall in love with someone new."

"I promise one day I'll come back for you."

"You'll never forgive me, though I'm doing this for you."

"I'm not ready for you now, please don't hate me."

"Well, these days I'm fine - No these days I tend to lie."

"I'm sorry, I let you down."

"I'm sorry, I bring you down."

"Congratulations you are all alone."

"Your time will come if you wait for it."

[iloveyouquotesblog]

[dadiisms-blog]

ofmotherly

this is literally my favorite song in the world ok and it has been for so long but here have some more feelings about post JW scott and karen ok

[dadiisms-blog]

ofmotherly

i’m going to spam you with everything on my spotify that i have feelings about okay becAUSE COLLEGE VERSE MAKE SME EMOTIONAL ok

[dadiisms-blog]

ofmotherly

[dadiisms-blog]

ofmotherly