hellhound posting

man who is also a wolf who is also a demon | posts nsfw topics sometimes minors dni

[daemondoggy]

how am i doing simaltenously better and worse.

maybe i should go back to therapy

[daemondoggy]

been thinking abt this a lot but like. actually i fucking hate the assertion that people who maybe don't understand cat language all that much "hate boundaries and consent"

like, way to expose that you've never interacted with a dog, either. dogs are more outwardly friendly and will put up with a little bit more than a cat will, but they absolutely have boundaries of their own and will let you know.

my dog, Poppy, didn't like her head being pat for the longest time, and would snap at your hand if you tried. my other dog, Puzzle, will move away if you touch his tail.

dogs HAVE boundaries, and this narrative that they don't actively contributes to how untrained some of these animals are. for all this "dog people hate cats bc boundaries" nonsense, cat people sure do like exposing that they don't understand dogs, either.

for the record, btw: i love cats. they're funny little guys. but i hate HATE this narrative that people who maybe don't like cats as much are evil and don't understand consent or boundaries when cats. yknow. can't fucking talk. they're a different species not everyone is going to be a cat behavioural expert.

btw this doesn't apply to people who actively bother a cat when it clearly doesn't want to be touched. u suck. but also the people who compare "not liking/understanding cats" to ISSUES WITH HUMAN CONSENT also suck imo.

[daemondoggy]

im like a dog but not like a pomeranian, like a wolfdog.

not excitable noise but more like.. quiet, i don't like it if you get too close too fast, but i will wag my tail if u give me a compliment

dog in the eager to please sense but wolfdog in the "if you dont give me space when i need it i will not be responsible for my actions" sense

[daemondoggy]

i often feel extremely alienated from conversations about "undiagnosed autism in afab children" because i just.. can't relate a lot of the time.

i didn't get straight As. i wasn't a teacher's pet. i didn't learn how to mask my traits by observation, they were violently bullied out of me to the point where i developed an anxiety disorder.

i displayed clear and obvious signs of autism, ranging from full on meltdowns to not understanding subtle instruction, to clear displays of special interests (i only learnt to read because the special ed teacher found books about horses), but i was never diagnosed. not because i wasn't obvious, not because i was subtle, but because nobody gave a fuck.

my teachers never had anything to say about me other than the fact they thought i should speak up more. i was assumed to be childish,

i broke a ruler once when i was ten, a ruler given to me by a friend i then never saw again, the ruler broke because a boy who bullied me had taken it and been waving it around, it snapped and it scared me and i burst into tears and the teachers assistant told me i was being ridiculous.

i somehow had the experience of being a diagnosed autistic child without the actual diagnosis. i was described as overemotional, i was in multiple special ed programs, i went to therapy multiple times for "anxiety". while i never experienced the horror of behavioural therapy, i still find it incredibly hard to approach my university professors because of the dismissive and cruel way i was often treated by my teachers at primary and secondary.

im sorry you had to hide away your autism for so long. im sorry about the unrealistic expectations placed upon you. but i screamed over a ruler and nobody noticed a thing.

[daemondoggy]

being autistic is weird and upsetting in part because i don't know where the line is. people tend to find my plushie collecting endearing, but will they find my need to consistently dehumanise myself the same?

like where's the line? where does my nonconformity with society become too weird?

i feel this way about being transgender to a certain extent too. how feminine can i get with my presentation until people decide that they're no longer going to see me as a man? will it be the choker? the chain? the heels? what's the line?