“Damn... that wound is really ugly. You should cover that up.”
“Ugly?! You’re the one who stabbed me!”
“I know; I almost feel bad! I don’t, obviously, but y’know. Almost.”
“You’re a real piece of work, you know that?!”
Xuebing Du
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@dailydialogueprompts
“Damn... that wound is really ugly. You should cover that up.”
“Ugly?! You’re the one who stabbed me!”
“I know; I almost feel bad! I don’t, obviously, but y’know. Almost.”
“You’re a real piece of work, you know that?!”
(grumbling) “Whatever this is about, it better be worth bothering me at six in the morning for.”
“One whole hour before your usual bedtime? I don’t know how I’ll ever make it up to you.”
“What the hell are you doing here? I told you to stay behind for your own protection! I was trying to keep you safe!”
“I don’t want to be safe, I want to be with you! Why can’t you understand that?”
“Wait! Once we’re behind enemy lines, what if we get separated? How will I find you?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to leave a nice, messy trail of corpses for you to follow.”
“This is a trap, isn’t it.”
“Most definitely.”
“So... we charging in headfirst, or what?”
“... This is why I adore you.”
“Remember, we need this man’s help, and we’re guests here in his house. That means that, whatever you do-“
“Don’t get caught. Got it.”
“How did you even get in here?!”
“You know, it’s amazing how much headway you can make if you just take a baseball bat and start smashing.”
“It’s a good plan. A solid plan. I might even like it, if I weren’t the one playing bait.”
“I’ve never understood people who refuse to take bribes. You do realize that after bribes comes threats, and after threats comes violence, right? Just take the twenty dollars and go.”
“So let me get this straight: you can’t hide, you can’t fight, you can’t even run quickly - what are you good for?”
“Honestly? Decoration, mostly.”
“You want relationship advice? Don’t listen to them. They have terrible taste in men.”
“What do you mean, I have ‘terrible taste in men’? I’m literally dating you!”
“Darling, that’s my point.”
“You again? What do you want from me this time? More money, more fame, more power? Here to demand from me the entire world delivered on a silver platter?”
“Actually, I... I just wanted to see you.”
A: “Wait... just how old are you exactly?”
B: “Not sure. What year is it?”
A: “3057.”
B: “Uh... fifty-seven minus nineteen, carry the four, minus another seven... three hundred and twenty eight years old?”
C: “Three hundred and thirty eight, idiot. Three centuries of life and you still can’t do basic math.”
“How cute! You actually think you made a difference. You actually think you mattered. Let me tell you a little secret, sweetheart: the only thing saving you from death right now is your utter insignificance.”
“Why is it that you’re only ever honest with me when you’re drunk, drugged, or dying?”
“What’s their problem, anyway? Why are they so mean to you?”
“You don’t know? It’s nothing serious; they’re just jealous you’re dating me.”
“Jealous? How can you tell?”
“When we first met, they looked at you, looked at me, spat at my feet and muttered, ‘lucky bitch.’ I’d say that was pretty telling.”
“How do you know me? Have we met before?”
“Unlikely. I did, however, know your father. The resemblance is uncanny.”
“You knew my father?”
“I did. Brilliant man, bit of an asshole. You seem to have turned out alright though.”