The Daily Gerbil: Warm-Ups for Writers

[dailygerbil]

During quarantine I think of Vampire Weekend

Write a poem that wonders how your favorite band (or celebrity) is doing today (4/16/20).  Every line should ask a question.

[dailygerbil]

Phone a friend

Ask a friend what they’re worried about, and then write a poem about that worry from your friend’s point of view.

[dailygerbil]

National Poetry Month

Write a haiku about coronavirus.

[dailygerbil]

Dear Evan Hansen

Spend at least five minutes writing a letter to yourself, being gentle with and proud of yourself for living through quarantine these past few weeks.

[dailygerbil]

Love Story

Spend five minutes writing about how your parents met.  Then brainstorm: how did the parents of your main character meet?  Aim to know this story as well as you know the one of your own parents.

[dailygerbil]

Barking

Daisy: "There is no way he likes her more than he likes me. After all she wasn't there to comfort him when he needed the most... but I was! I was the one that gave you unconditionditional love, not her! I bet she wouldn't even be with you if you didn't have your finances straight."

*Max is having a hard time understanding what Daisy is trying to say*

Max: "What are you trying to say girl? Is everything alright?" 

Amy, Max's girlfriend, who tends to get annoyed by dogs, utters; "just let her do her thing Max. She is probably barking for the fun of it." 

Daisy: "That bitch!" 

Max: "For the love of God please stop barking Daisy!"

[dailygerbil]

Sticky Situation

It was a roll of packing tape that sent her into a spiral. Who leaves a good, full roll of tape stranded on the sidewalk? Some of those thoughts must have breached into the grumble zone, because she heard the pairs of conversations on the sidewalk around her dim slightly, and a man who looked like a walking app start-up threw her a glance, tentatively reaching for an AirPod. But the roll stuck with her for the rest of the day. On the train, she thought of the sleek box her shiny new computer monitor came in, still perched patiently under her desk at work. A gorgeous box like that would scoff at sidewalk tape. In a Target, she thought of the hunky refrigerator box, waiting sprawled out in her basement. Beep! A price scanner bumped her back into reality.

“Just the tape, sweetheart?”

“Just the tape.”

[dailygerbil]

Patricia and her puppies

Patricia loved her dachshunds. She looked forward to spending time with them, there were all she needed. Ray loved Patricia. It was really very simple, and also unfortunate. Every now and then, when she walked by, he would ask if she wanted to have dinner. "You know, as neighbors do!" Every time she would politely decline. She "Had things to tend to at home, and the puppies need attention". He thought today would be different, since no one could go to work, and maybe she would be lonely too. Today was not different. Actually it was, since it hurt more than usual. Ray hated her dachshunds. 

[dailygerbil]

love triangle submission

My flight was leaving in 2 hours, which meant I really should be on my way to the airport already. Cardboard boxes of the things I couldn't fit in my (overpriced) beat up red suitcase littered the floor, sat on top of my bare blue mattress. It was the mattress I was supposed to fuck him on, when he got back from break. Which clearly isn't happening, because I'm going home, and he's already home, fucking Connecticut, which I didn't think had beaches but apparently does. It also has his ex girlfriend, a senior in highschool now. Actually, she might not be his ex. I forget the details. Either way, she didn't know about me and I only knew about her in theory, which made everything okay, but it looks like going home is going to keep me morally upstanding.

[dailygerbil]

Cancun

Last night Melody went out drinking with Jamie. Again. Which is fine. I shouldn’t care about the friends Melody keeps, long as they’re good to her. And Jamie’s great to her. For Melody’s birthday Jamie took us all to Cancun. Just Jamie and me and Melody. It was a delightful week and Jamie paid for quite literally everything. Well I paid for drinks once, but other than that Jamie paid for everything.

But I will admit, I am jealous of their relationship. They’re so close and constantly tethered to each other’s hips. And if you saw the way Jamie looked at Melody…

However, I am an adult. So instead of drafting a melodramatic Tumblr post and selfishly indulging in my angst, I will simply disregard my internal doubt and have an open and honest conversation with my wife should these feelings begin to infringe on our relationship. Because, more than anything, I love my wife. I love her more than any broody Spotify playlist or pathetic pity-party crying session. And I won’t ruin our relationship because of some self-imposed love triangle.

[dailygerbil]

A Walk in the Park

As I walked down Arbre Way, I readjusted my hat and pulled on Milly’s lead to stop her from walking. I noticed a man having a picnic, and he seemed to be talking to…nobody. Milly and I walked closer. I soon realized that it was Joe, the mailman! I released Milly from her lead to let her run free. I ran beside her, attempting to entrance my soulmate, Joe. He stopped talking abruptly when I arrived at the corner of his blanket, but he also seemed pleased to see me.  “Heloisa! Take a seat on my blanket; I was just talking to my late wife, Hermina,” “Oh, I don’t mean to interrupt you, but may I ask, is..is..she d..dead?” “Oh yes, but we are still madly in love, and we always speak to each other on Thursdays. Don’t worry, my lovely Heloisa. I love you too!”

[dailygerbil]

I think of Hope

The bench was cold beneath my legs. It’s better than sitting on the couch with Ben, though; that much I know. I can’t take lying to him anymore. It’s eating away at me; every minute of every day. I want to tell him, but I know it would be the end of us. I never planned on being in love with two people at once- who does? I’ve been with Ben since high school. He’s all I’ve ever known. He’s been with me through everything, through my dad dying, my sister relapsing, the loss of our first pregnancy, everything. That’s the thing though, when you’ve been with someone through, what feels like war, it’s almost like the relationship has combusted from the inside out, slowly without each of you even realizing it. When I think of Cameron I think of a new start, a new world- I think of hope.

[dailygerbil]

Love Triangle Submission: Red Wine

Then I’d disappear into my sheets. 

Thinking about how you used to taste. 

Let me pretend you didn’t disappear and leave me with stale weed and too much time and space for my heart to bleed into a room where Janis Joplin used to play from the boombox on my balcony. Let me show you some new tricks with my hips and lick red wine off your lips. The Cabernet in our fridge tastes bitter but it was never that sweet to begin with. Could we meet up just for one night in an alternate universe where stars would spill out of constellations with your arms wrapped around me? I’m stuck on planet earth wanting to fuck someone else wearing the T-shirt you gave me.

Maybe I’ll let the sun undress me and stop waiting for your return.

[dailygerbil]

Amory Park Showdown

You take three bisexuals and you put them in a park. Sounds like the beginning of a terrible joke. This was a terrible joke. We sat on a hand woven blanket. We’d all post a picture later with a caption like “just vibing”. Just vibing? More like “just cheating”. I know Johnny and Taylor are hooking up. I really don’t think the new “Woody” nickname is just because of his cartoon, oblong, Toy Story head. That’s my girlfriend cowboy, back the fuck off. God, the longer I look at him the uglier he gets. Wait. Maybe. Maybe I could stand his face long enough to give Taylor a taste of what she’s been serving me. And babe let me tell you, it doesn’t taste like that brie you’re stuffing in your mouth right now. Three bisexuals sitting in a park. Just vibing.

[dailygerbil]

Fresh Air

It definitely helped to get out of the house for some fresh air, and Sparky could use the exercise. As quiet as the walk was, my thoughts were loud. What troubled me the most was that he didn't turn off his location before he went to her place. Did he just forget, or did he want me to see? I get that he's mad that I moved back with my parents for this whole thing, but this is ridiculous. Maybe I had been doing something wrong all this time, and he just didn't tell me? I almost hope I did something to push him away, because at least I can fix that. But there's nothing I can do if he just likes her better.  Sparky took a moment's pause to do his business, and we made eye contact.

"At least you're loyal."

[dailygerbil]

I tried

I tried everything not to. I never wore jeans. I never wore makeup. I never straightened my hair. I always talked back. I loved movies and you loved books. You knew everything about politics and I couldn’t tell you what happened in the primaries. I couldn’t handle a pinch of black pepper in my food without chugging a gallon of water and you had a packet of crushed red pepper with you at every meal. I never wanted to talk about my family but you always asked me questions about them. I tried to distance myself but you wouldn’t let me. I fell in love with you and in an Oedipus sort of way you fell in love with me too. But she was in love with you first. 

[dailygerbil]

oops

The streets were lonely and expansive. Apart from the occasional car whisking by, I was completely alone. And I felt completely alone. I thought back to before the virus. It seemed like ages ago since I’d seen her. Celeste was cooped up with John in a studio apartment. Why wasn’t she answering my calls? John is a good guy but he’s been in love with her since freshman year. My mind was racing … why did I yell at her? She wasn’t even flirting she was just being friendly. Why was I always so insecure? If I hadn’t driven her away…