The Catalyst

Daniel "Danny" Logan. 25. Bartender & Idiot. This is fine!

[danny-logan]

meet the catalyst: danny logan

Welcome to Coolsville, the best little small town in Ohio.

…except for right now, but that’s not really DANIEL “DANNY” LOGAN (JOE KEERY) fault, is it? Known as the CATALYST around town, HE is just your friendly neighborhood BARTENDER. Sure they can be HEADSTRONG and CHILDISH, but they can also be LOYAL and DETERMINED just like any other 25 year old. That doesn’t mean they have anything to do with our string of recent chilling events, though… right?

tropes: the himbo, the klutz, upper-class twit, cosmic plaything, the bartender

Back to Basics:

Name: Daniel “Danny” Logan

Age: 25 big ones baby

Gender: Cisgender Male

Sexuality: Known Disaster Bisexual

Height: 5′10 (he does lie and say he’s 5′11 frequently though)

Dig a Little Deeper (tw implied not so great family dynamics)

Danny knows he’s privileged. He grew up in the perfect house into he perfect neighborhood with parents who could give him everything he wanted. He was their prized little boy and when his sister was born they were paraded around town, to church functions, to community events in their little suit and dress.

He was the perfect doting brother. Whenever his sister would get lost or get herself into trouble he would find her and guide her back to the path.

Everything was perfect, until it wasn’t.

Things were okay in elementary school. He was easily excitable but for the most part everyone overlooked it. It wasn’t until middle and high school that his grades started falling enough that his parents took notice.

Can you really be diagnosed with ADHD if your parents refuse to acknowledge it? The general feeling with Mother and Father Logan was that if we don’t say tell anyone, it’s not real, so Danny continued to struggle in school, being forced to listen to angry and aggressive tutors most of his life.

When he got into college, he struggled more. His parents hired Darcy (years younger than him) to help him stay on track and even then he graduated a year later than he was supposed to. 

And when he walked out of that building with his business degree? Well he might as well have burnt it for the look of horror in his parents eyes when he announced he was moving out of their house, into an apartment, and would be working as a bartender for the time being.

The tides changed after that. Danny, no longer the prized pony in the race, was turned into the family’s black sheep. All focus turned to making sure Dani was going to fulfill their dreams of being the perfect golden girl. And she’s done a great job of it, really, and her big brother is proud. But ever since his family basically turned their backs on him, their relationship has been incredibly strained.

But now she’s missing. She’s missing and all Danny can think about is that one time she got lost in the antique shop and he found her crying amongst the crystal glasses, terrified that if she moved something might break and their mother would yell. All he can think about is how she clutched onto his shirt and told him she didn’t think he would find her.

All he can think about is what he said after that, the promise he made at 13 years old that shouldn’t feel like a burden on his shoulders 12 years later. 

“Dani, I’m your big brother. I promise that I’ll always find you.”

WANTED CONNECTIONS PAGE

[danny-logan]

darcywarren​:

+

While everything Danny was saying was nice to hear, Darcy found that she couldn’t yet move past things. Deep down she believed him, she really did. But when her mind had been made up she could be terribly stubborn.

“Thank you,” she offered, the words quiet as she tried to force herself to forgive and forget. Or at least to invite him inside. But all she could manage to do was cross her arms and avoid eye contact.

It just wasn’t that simple.

“According to Tommy’s carefully gathered statistics, which he presented to me in a raw data format so I could be sure the survey was scientifically sound, I’m not below a seven on a maximum of ten scale. And seven didn’t even pop up the most. The mean, median, and mode are all favorable,” she insisted.

Maybe bringing up Tommy’s statistics wasn’t the wisest choice, but they had been just the ego boost that Darcy had needed in the moment. And also proof that even idiots could rank her highly (no offense to Tommy or his friends).

Plus, the more statistics she peppered into the conversation, the more she felt herself calming down.

Everything that Danny was saying matched with what had been scientifically proven to her. It was a fact. Her worldview was realigning, with the sequence of events of the past half-day becoming more clear. It was… going to be okay.

The hurt would fade, she knew, but the memory of it might stick around even with everything being a misunderstanding. And if she figured out exactly why her take on Danny’s comment had cut so deep, she’d put that knowledge into the little box in the back of her mind to confront later. In therapy, perhaps.

Having let a beat of silence stretch on, Darcy finally let her arms fall, gesturing for the male to enter her home.

“I, of course, have to insist that you not drink bleach or otherwise unalive yourself. It feels important to stress that.”

---------------------------------

Danny tried to follow whatever it was she was saying. Mean. Median. Medium? Median. Range? Mode? What the fuck was she saying? He rattled his brain for a moment and finally something knocked loose. Right. Statistics. She was saying that everyone found her hot.

Well, that kind of left a bitter taste in his mouth.

“I mean, they’re right,” he admitted with a half smile. “You’re hot and they’d be stupid to not see it. Just trying to bring objective science into this.”

He swallowed. Maybe that’s not what she wanted to hear from him right now. Maybe this was a feelings moment and not a stats moment? Or maybe everything was a stats moment. 

His head hurt.

“I hope you’d insist it. I hear from Heather Chandler it tastes pretty gross.” It was, perhaps, a bad attempt at a joke, a failure he had been making the entire day, but he really wanted to take a deep breath and enjoy her company, even for a minute.

Danny continued, “Also we’re friends, last I checked. I have to say my opinion is likewise on that. How about a promise? No drinking bleach for either of us.” He held out his hand, pinkie stretched. “Pinkie promise.”

[danny-logan]

valentinagarridos​:

♥  

Valentina could empathize with the sentiment. Everything about her own mother felt foreign, so far removed from anything Valentina could ever hope to understand. She’d read somewhere that parents could be like lighthouses, as much shelter as they were a warning. Somehow, her mother had only ever felt like the latter and though her father could be the former, he was so reluctant to love his children that his own embraces felt cold. 

“I don’t think many people know themselves,” it’s a thought she’d had once, since buried under all those other things she’d wished to forget, “and you shouldn’t spend your time trying to finish the puzzle or whatever it is that people are.” They’re plain words wrapped in lace and hypocrisy, but what else could she offer him? Val hadn’t learned a thing from her time in therapy save some buzz words and she’d been paying so little attention, that she’d surely to misuse them. 

Somewhere along the lines, she might even trample along that sliver of hope he had. 

“Maybe,” though she’s scared she’ll prove him wrong, that she’ll follow in her mother’s footsteps via nightmarish mimicry. The thought alone makes her pause, but Val remembers that the moment has nothing to do with her, not really. She’d extend a brittle olive branch, if it helped, “it’s a good a time as any to try and break generational curses.”

She has to shake her head then, because those words still sound like defeat and he’s better than that. Val thinks it’s one reason their house of cards had toppled over. “Full offense, but, you know that sounds really pitiful right? What happened to all that vitality and gusto you had all those years ago? And don’t tell me it’s gone— you’d spent all those years holding on to something and now you’re letting it go?” 

------------------------

Danny thinks for a second, looking at Valentina. There’s a part of him that feels transported to a time long ago, only now he’s seeing it all through her eyes and he feels a bit like an asshole for trying to force his feelings onto her. It definitely wasn’t fair. At all.

“You know, I used to think I did, in high school. I was so sure of who I was going to be, what my future was, who I was as a person: a cheerleading idiot that would coast by on his parents money. And then, I don’t know, maybe college and meeting Darcy made me realize I could be so infinitely much more. Like the world exploded into technicolor. That spark of hope erupted into this huge fucking flame and then...and then...” He swallows hard and averts his gaze. “And then I guess I grew up again.”

The next thing she says does make him laugh, though it’s mostly at himself. It does sound pitiful, he can’t even argue. Maybe it was supposed to. Maybe he wanted the world to open up and swallow him fucking whole if he was a bit enough asshole to himself.

Danny swallows. “I don’t know. I think the fact that Dani is missing and I feel this huge weight of failure on my back is making it harder to feel that way. I was always so good at hoping and now it feels like my one talent is fading fast. I can’t throw people into the air anymore and now I can’t even hope that maybe one day I will. I know this is defeatist. I know and I am trying so hard to not be, but...”

He trails off for a moment before he manages to choke out, “What if it all falls apart?”

[danny-logan]

camxwhite​:

~

Cameron hates being in such a state with her emotions. Her whole thing in their friendship was being the sensible one. On occasion, she would be the idiot, or the one who dared Danny to do something stupid, but when it came to most matters, she was the one with enough common sense, and logical thought process to figure things out. But, when it was her own heart at play? Well, Cameron was lucky she hadn’t stuck all the way in her mouth yet. 

There was still time, much to her chagrin. Even more of it when she was one of the people on this mission to find Dani. A fact that Cameron could not tell Danny, because it would take him all of five seconds to work his way through the short list of options that would leave him with. 

God, she hates having feelings. 

She huffs out a sigh and nods as Danny regurgitates everything she just said in far less emotional language. And then, promptly redirects his attention, however briefly, onto yet another food vendor. Frankly, drowning her sorrows in food destined to take at least a few months off her lifespan sounds ideal at the moment, so who is she to complain, really? 

“Yeah, I’ve got this one,” She offers, already crossing in front of him to prevent any unnecessary protest from him. 

She barks out a laugh at the reminder of their stint with a life of crime. A short lived one at that seeing as they had both nearly gone off the deep end the minute something went wrong. “I know you’re right, and I am definitely blowing this whole thing up in my head. I’m just,” She sighs, not entirely sure where she’s going with that statement. “I’m just hopeless in romance. I get my feelings hurt too easy.” She grabs the funnel cake, mumbling out a thank you before passing it towards Danny. “That whole tax benefit marriage thing is looking better and better.”

-----------------------------

Danny can sort of tell that Cam is frustrated that he’s making sense. Sense was not usually part of his vocabulary, more so hers, so the fact that he’s the one preaching this time is probably frustrating her. Which, in some ways, makes his sudden burst of romantic knowledge all the sweet. He won’t tell her that though. Right now she’s allowed to mourn and feel or whatever she needs to do with him like he’s done with Darcy for literally years at this point.

When she offers to pay, he first pumps a little, trying to quickly finish off the corn by dumping it from the Styrofoam cup directly into his mouth. It is not attractive at all but at this point he isn’t really trying to be. Who cares if people are watching? His love life is destroyed. After he finds Dani he’ll run off and go be a nun or something.

“Thanks, babe,” Danny offers. 

Maybe there is a reason this entire heteronormative town thinks they’re dating.

“Dude you are beyond preaching to the choir right now. Darcy basically give a bit rejection on the Ferris Wheel of Dream Crushing and I’m in fucking mourning. But,” he points at her as they find a seat at one of the old plastic tables they have set up everywhere for people to sit and each. “I don’t think you’re blowing it up in your head, okay? I think you’re seeing something, you’re feeling it, and you’re acting on it. You know acting on your feelings isn’t a bad thing. Letting yourself be emotional isn’t a bad thing. It shows a healthy understanding of how you’re experiencing life.”

Danny rips off a piece of the funnel cake, immediately spreading powdered sugar everyone. “Aw man. Come on. These jeans are new.”

[danny-logan]

camxwhite​:

~

Well, he’s not wrong. Cameron could just outright ask if she regrets it. But, then that corners them both into a conversation she’s not sure she’s ready to have. Her ego would be forever bruised if the answer was yes. And, if the answer was no, that would grant her no more clarity on what had happened that had made Lucy oh so avoidant with her. 

She takes the corn from him, not even registering it as weird. This was the fair, people share food all the time at the fair. Maybe not corn but, hey. Why buy two? 

With her respective bite, she hands it back off to Danny and sighs, maybe a touch melodramatically. “It’s just— it wasn’t like we just hooked up in the back room of the Cougar Pub. There was… there was build up, and conversation, and it was her decision. I thought, maybe that was a good sign that she was moving in the right direction. But, now I’m freaked out that I might have just slingshotted her right back into the closet somehow. Like, with something I did or said, and I pushed it too far, and now she doesn’t even want to look at me anymore.” She furrowed her brow, trying to think over the experience again, see if anything of note popped out. 

With a groan, she places her hand at her forehead. “I think I might sound like an insane person right now, but I just wanted to be alone for all of five minutes. And, you know, the last place you’d expect to find presumed serial killer Cameron White is in the tunnel of love. I just didn’t figure they’d stick me with someone random, and with my luck, it happened to be a former fling.” A former fling Cameron wasn’t quite sure she wanted to be former.

“This is somehow punishment from the universe. I don’t even know for what, but that’s the only explanation I can think of.”

-----------

Danny thinks that, maybe, Cameron might be overreacting a little bit right now. Then again, his entire life is overreacting when it comes to Darcy’s minor movements. Not that he really wants to think about Darcy at all right now after her blatant rejection of him on the Ferris Wheel. He doesn’t know what the fuck will happen in the future, but their lunch not dates are about to be a huge bummer for him knowing that she’s got no attraction.

God this whole fucking week has sucked so much ass.

Still, he tries to focus on Cameron and her troubles instead. That, at least, is something he can handle. Or at least pretend to handle.

“Right. You guys had like a connection and a moment so you not understanding where the sudden cold shoulder is coming from is definitely an issue for you. Whatever reason she’s doing a physical ghost channel is weird.” Danny takes another bite of the corn and points out a funnel cake stand. “Wanna eat that?”

Right now, he wants to eat everything and anything. Hopefully, it’ll get his mind off of the fucking shit show of his existence.

“We did break into my parent’s house so that could be the reason for the universe karma. But,” he emphasizes, “I don’t think that’s the reason. I think things are just a hot mess. I think she’s nervous and maybe she likes you a whole lot but is nervous because she’s not out of the closet. Not to anyone and maybe not to herself, you know?”

[danny-logan]

valentinagarridos​:

♥ 

You can’t pour from an empty cup, and Valentina’s parents had never made the effort to fill hers ( their own must have been empty as well ). Whatever attempts she’d make to show compassion would be inutile— it had never been a necessary skill, and she thinks that whatever part of her was made for exothermic embraces had atrophied long ago. And in this moment, part of her wants to be anywhere else; part of her thinks she’ll say the wrong thing, that she’d leave him worse off than she had found him. Val had already done it before. 

But she’s not soft and she doesn’t know how to be, not in the ways that Danny might need and certainly not in the ways he thinks she’s capable of. Valentina would be a fool to think otherwise, but she’s always known herself. 

Instead of filling his ears with platitudes, Val moves close enough that their shoulders touch, hoping the act conveys the words that she can’t say: I’m here, I understand. She’d wrap her arms around him if it didn’t feel like such a leviathan task, but it does, and so she doesn’t.

“Listen,” there’s a pause because Valentina knows the words are better left on the cutting-room floor; she says them anyways, “I don’t think they will.” Not if they’re anything like her own mother and father. “And if she wants to leave then there’s no reason you shouldn’t do the same. Fabían is in Spain right now, he left to go find something that was better for him than this town and I’m sure Tomas will follow.” The youngest of the Garrido children would always tell his sister that he’d stay by her side, but she wouldn’t clip his wings. None of them belonged here.

She wouldn’t voice it ( in case the words felt too introspective for comfort, ) but, this town was filled with people unfit to be parents, bringing children into this world that they couldn’t and wouldn’t care for. On sleepless nights, Val wonders if that’s one more cycle she’d continue and the possibility of it nearly makes her swear-off motherhood. “I just don’t think you belong here. In that bookstore, maybe, but not in this town,” the one where people live and breed and die as he’d so poetically described. 

-------------------------

Danny knows that more than anything Valentina struggles with intimacy like this. They didn’t date for as long as they did to not be aware of that situation. Still, he wishes she could be a bit kinder, a bit more open. He loves her regardless. Though that love has changed so drastically in these last few years. 

“My parents are unreadable in a way I have never understood,” he laughs gently but there is no humor there, only a gentle pain that has existed for as long as he can remember. “I don’t know how they feel about anything. I think it changes for them on the day.”

There’s a deep breath before he can answer. “I’m glad. Really. That they managed to get out. We all deserve to. It just sucks that not all of us get to. I hope...” he grimaces, “I hope that changes one day. That there are not people in the world who are always stuck in the way that we are. That maybe, eventually, we can change that for our kids.”

It feels good to hear her say it anyway. He doesn’t belong here. No, no he doesn’t, and it has taken him a very long time to realize that.

“A bookstore is the dream, isn’t it? We’ll see. Maybe when I’m 60 my parents will die of like an aneurism or a heart attack and I can sell the company and get out.”

[danny-logan]

camxwhite​:

~

To be quite frank, not telling Danny who she slept with feels cheap. They tell each other everything. Whether the other really wants the gory details or not. It was just who they were as friends, a little too close, and a little too aware of each other’s personal endeavors. Never past a point of comfort, but the last several years has lead them to getting very relaxed with the details they share. Of course, the Lucy situation is different. Whether or not Danny even really knows Lucy is besides the point, it’s not her secret to go spreading around. 

Either way, she figures she owes him more than just a quick, off the cuff, explanation that she had slept with some girl he couldn’t know. Surely, she could dance around who and still give him more details about her situation before she combusted. 

Maybe it shouldn’t have been the focus since they were meant to be having fun, and talking about how much of a disaster her love life wasn’t fun. Not to mention, his Sister was still missing, and that was another issue entirely. But, he seemed almost eager to hear about it, even if he was just placating her because of the fact that she had been so insistent to talk about something for once in her life. Or, maybe it was just a good distraction. Either way, she’d accept it.

“Right, and I’m…” She pauses for a moment, practically holding her breath, before exhaling a little too aggressively. “I don’t know. I think, somehow, she might hate me? Or be upset with me at the very least.”

“I don’t know, we hooked up a few weeks back, and now it seems like she doesn’t even like to look me in the eye. I mean, she literally looked mortified to see me when we got shoved into that boat together. I mean, maybe she regrets what happened? Or regrets that it was me? I don’t want her to regret it, but it’s not like I can just ask her if she regrets it.”

---------------------

Talking about someone else’s love life is an incredible relief right now. Darcy basically shot him down forever in the Ferris Wheel and he’s not sure how, if ever, he’ll get over that horrible heartbreak. Maybe he’ll die a hermit. Maybe he’ll find his sister and then go off into the woods and make weird tree art. Maybe he could become an urban legend all on his own.

Listening to Cami helps a lot. At least he isn’t the only one who’s life is a fucking hot mess right now.

“I mean, you could,” Danny says as he pays for a cup of fried corn from one of the stands. He takes a bite and then hands it to Cam to share.

(Are they gross? Probably.)

“It’s not a bad thing to check base after an intense romantic encounter? Especially if you’re looking to do The Sideways Tango Two: Electric Boogaloo.” He hums as they continue to walk. She’s freaking out but it’s endearing in a lot of ways. Also, he probably sounds like this about Darcy, so telling her to such up feels incredibly hypocritical. “The boat this is mortifying no matter what, Cami. I wouldn’t dig deep on that one. But, let me do some math on this one. She doesn’t want you telling anyone, she seems embarrassed and anxious so maybe....she just isn’t comfortable with the gay thing yet? I mean think about it, when you figured out you were part of the Alphabet Soup it was weird right? It was for me. I was like oh shit am I even still a guy? Am I less than a dude now? Maybe there’s that same thought process, you know? For some ladies.”

Danny takes the food back and takes another bite, pausing in between his chewing. “Can I ask another question? Why the fuck did you get in line for a love boat ride by yourself? Like were you looking to bone a stranger in the pale moonlight? We could arrange that in a location that probably doesn’t have jizz rotted wood boats.”

[namchyoon]

BIG MOUTH (2022)

[danny-logan]

valentinagarridos​:

♥ 

They’re not words she expected to hear from him ( ever )— and it suddenly hits her that, just this once, she would have liked to be proven wrong. Did she feel the same all those years before? Valentina doesn’t think she would have reveled in it, but she doubts it would have felt as acrid as it does now. There’s no glory to be found in Danny’s pain nor is there any satisfaction to accompany them in this moment.

“I’m sorry,” and apologies are few and far between with Val, but it’s fitting now, because she is sorry, “I didn’t want to be right.” Val would have been content with defeat where this game was concerned. As it stood, his defeat felt like her own because some part of Valentina had wanted for him, the things he wanted for them.

Moreover, there was no ‘us’. She’d be fine participating in the lifecycle of her small town family and he’d suffer through it. “You tried because that’s what you do, Danny,” Val thinks he’d be unrecognizable otherwise.

That must be why the moment feels so wrong; to sit beside this sinking ship feels wrong. And she’s no lighthouse, no beacon of hope and safety. All she can offer is understanding, and even then, most parts of Danny are written in a language that she can’t understand. Val could try to pour water on this fire, but she’d go and mistake the kerosene for water. How did people even go about comforting one another other ( and in public spaces of all things )?

“Does this mean the bookstore is out of the question?” 

-----------------

Maybe there was a part of Danny that wanted Val to tell him that he was wrong, that he could still fight, that could he still win. It shouldn’t really comes as a surprise that instead she offers him her condolences on the matter. The apology is a surprise though. It’s not like it’s her fault.

He wishes there was beer here tonight. And if there is, he hasn’t found it yet.

It does surprise him though, that out of all things she remembers the bookstore. It used to be the one thing he held onto. The business degree would help, he had told himself all throughout college. She’s the only one that knows that’s his secret wish. His darkest desire.

Kids used to joke that he couldn’t even read growing up and yet here was, mourning a bookstore that never really even existed. That never could exist.

“I don’t know. Maybe...maybe after we find Dani my parents will ease up. But even then I don’t know if I can leave her to the wolves, you know? What if she wants to get out after everything? Don’t I owe it to her to let her? Isn’t it my job to stand in the line of fire for her?”

He hasn’t been the best brother lately, but in his defense he’s not sure she’s been the best sister. Parental forces have been forcing them apart for years. Even if he still remembers the look on her face when she ate her funnel cake; when he had snuck her away from his parents at this very festival and they’d eaten it so fast to hide the evidence that they both got sick.

[danny-logan]

darcywarren​:

+

Darcy wanted to respond to Danny’s theories about his new job, she really did, but her own words had temporarily ruined her ability to speak.

She wished that there was a way to take back her little fun fact, the casual dropping of the word intimacy after some of her dramatics of the past week landing awkwardly. The relationship between herself and Danny was platonic, obviously, but had she not just days prior indefinitely postponed their friendly mini golf prom in part because she had assumed he’d rather die than have any form of sexual intimacy with her?

She’d been able to rationalize the incident away, burying any complicated thoughts (as well as the memories surrounding the trauma she’d spilled to Danny that night) into her DO NOT OPEN mind box, but no time at all had passed and she’d potentially skirted a well established boundary yet again.

And why? She didn’t even…

But there were many forms of intimacy. You could be platonic friends with emotional intimacy.

Was that what she was feeling in the moment?

The tender gesture as a result of a gust of wind wasn’t necessarily surprising, but it was… confusing. It was a rare moment when Darcy didn’t know what was going on or how to proceed, but with very little warning her figurative vision had gone a little wonky. What she knew to be very clear lines were a little more blurry.

She had been in close proximity to Danny countless times before, so what was different? The fact that they were several feet in the air on a rickety carnival ride? Surrounded by stars and at some point maybe even fireworks? Was it… the eye contact? Had a short and sweet staring contest fostered maybe a little too much intimacy?

You really could never underestimate the tried and true results of a scientific study.

“I-” she started after a moment, losing the destination of the sentence before it could even really take off. Her voice had been barely a whisper anyway.

She let her eyes drop from Danny’s, but only for a moment. Like the death drop ride nearby, they’d only traveled a brief path down to his lips (why??) before they were back on his eyes.

And then…

The ride came to a screeching halt yet again, sending the small car they were in rocking and rolling and Darcy’s walls back up to where they should have been all along. The realistic place. Where looking into someone’s eyes and brushing hair out of their face didn’t mean anything. Because it was a very friendly gesture.

Whatever temporary spell had been cast over her (she was certain it was yet another misinterpretation) was broken.

“I don’t think that we really made eye contact while I was tutoring you,” she finally managed to say. Her eyes were no longer able to land on Danny at all. “If anything, you should have been making intense eye contact with the books.”

----------------

Danny could feel when all of the air was sucked out of the little space they shared. It was like something had shifted, something they had been working very hard to fight, to ignore, to push aside and figure out later. Whenever later eventually came.

If later eventually ever came.

But this song and dance of ignoring his feelings and trying to jump over conversational land mines was getting incredibly exhausting and it was starting to feel like just for a moment, him and Darcy might actually be in sync again. After years of orbiting each other, they had never managed to create that perfect alignment. It was better this way, he rationalized it to himself, so much easier.

He could always tell her tomorrow.

With Dani missing though, he was starting to wonder if there would be a tomorrow some days. Would Darcy still be with him a year, five years, ten years from now if he didn’t start walking towards his end goal? Was he comfortable with the idea of simply giving up and letting whatever happen be the end of it all?

No.

No he wasn’t.

She was looking at his lips. He could feel it. He knew it. Because this was not Danny’s first time with having a girl look at him like this, his first time with a girl wanting him in the way he thought that maybe Darcy might want him. He wondered, quietly, if maybe this was just what happened during moments like this. The air was thick with expected romance and their skin was touching and their eyes were locked and maybe that’s what the universe said was supposed to happen. 

So why couldn’t he do it?

“Darcy, I-” Danny thought for a moment that he might kiss her. Might lean down and finally finish this business he’d started maybe five years ago.

The universe, it seemed, had other plans. The ride was lurching them forward as the ferris wheel’s sadist worker began loading and unloading people. It was just a more stops before they were forced to get off too. 

And what then? Surely not this again.

Was he okay with that?

“I don’t think we really made eye contact while I was tutoring you.” 

Oh.

Okay then.

Danny pulled back, looking out the window in a desperate attempt to avoid the fact that he thought he might cry. Maybe he really was imagining it all in his head. It wouldn’t be the first time he created an elaborate fantasy of something better than his life.

“Yeah, well, I probably should have paid attention more to chemistry than what color your eyes were.”

He tried his best not to sound too bitter.

The ride goes back around and they were able to get off at last. As long as Danny lived he never wanted to step foot in one of those things again. But he tried to smile, tried to keep it all together -- just like he always did.

“So about you winning me a stuffed animal from a rigged machine with your science skills?”

[danny-logan]

As awful as the last few days have been, Danny is glad to be getting around and enjoying himself. The whole festival rings a bit hallow when he knows it’s just a matter of time before shit hits the fan and he’s forced to confront his parents for work every day while also trying to figure out where in the fuck his sister is. It’s like playing the world’s most demented game of Where’s Waldo.

But right now, he’s with Cameron, and he’s determined to make sure they both have an amazing time. She deserves it after the great prison escape. Even if technically her prison escape is making bail and his parents dropping charges.

The only thing hanging in the air is what she had said earlier.

“So,” Danny starts, “What did you need to talk to me about?”

They’re walking through the long expanse of the game areas, watching as teenage dreamboats try to win things for their girlfriends. He wonders, idly, if he should try and win Darcy something. He’s not sure she would even like a stuffed chimpanzee hanging from a hook but it’s the thought that counts, right?

“There’s a girl, you can’t tell me her name and you’re...” he trails off, hoping that she’ll finish it quickly so he can find out exactly what’s been going on. Cam’s been talking in weird phrases and dodging questions about the situation left and right. The fact that she hasn’t even told him a name yet is killing him, but he’s trying to be good and respect her privacy.

@camxwhite​

[danny-logan]

darcywarren​:

+

“So they devolve and then evolve again?” Darcy questioned, trying to piece together the logic behind Danny’s reply even if there wasn’t much sense to be made from it. It was likely a joke, based on the fact that middle schoolers were actually demons and not people at all.

(Also a joke.)

Danny hadn’t done all that well in science in college, but she was pretty sure he was aware of the fact that such a metamorphosis didn’t occur twice. Even middle schoolers were wholly people. But such a conversation was a nice temporary distraction from the spinning wheel of death she’d shoved herself into, so she appreciated it.

Somehow, she appreciated the physical reminder that everything was going to be okay even more.

Eyes dropping down to their joined hands if only for a moment, Darcy allowed herself one squeeze for reassurance before carefully adjusting her positioning inside the carriage so she could focus solely on the male to her right. She didn’t drop his hands, though.

“I figured you could use a little joy, so it was worth a shot. But message received and noted for the future. It does absolutely nothing for me in the present, but it’s appreciated,” she managed a smile. “As for Logancorp, I’ve been doing a little of everything, but nothing terribly exciting yet. What exactly is your job?”

It may have been dark by that point, but the lights along the edge of the ferris wheel were still illuminating them enough to be able to see each other well enough. And Darcy had always been an overachiever when following directions.

As they moved higher and higher, it wasn’t just the polite conversation they were having that was keeping the world from closing in on her (she actually didn’t have a fear of heights). No, what was keeping her calm was the eye contact she was maintaining with perhaps the person she cared most about.

She hadn’t spent much time studying them before, but Danny’s eyes were a nice hazel. Warm. Expressive. And his presence was so reassuring. The little box they were hurtling around in felt less small as long as she kept looking at him.

“Also,” she found herself saying, unable to keep the new fun fact that had popped into her mind from spilling from her lips. “Did you know that several studies have suggested that sustained periods of eye contact foster intimacy?”

--------------------

Danny had done what he had done, and said what he had said, for no other reason than to provide Darcy a bit of comfort during a moment of obvious distress. She was the one who had mentioned the wheel and had done it to make him smile. It only seemed fair that he would offer some kindness in return.

He had not, of course, factored in the prospect of her squeezing his hand and then adjusting her body so they were facing each other. All at once, he became acutely aware of how romantic this moment was. It was a scene out of any late 80s, early 90s small town romantic comedy. He had seem countless numbers of them, always forcing Cam to sit through what she (rightly) called “straight people nonsense.”

“My job?” Danny repeated, trying to force his brain to catch up to his mouth before he said something incredibly fucking stupid. “Oh right. Honestly who knows. More than anything I think my parents are just doing it to prove to everyone they still have control over me and therefore the entire town. I’ll probably just...look at things, follow one of my parents around all day, be allowed thirty minutes to myself at lunch before jumping though hoops for their entertainment.”

When she spoke next, his breath hitched. Fostering intimacy. What did that mean? What was she saying? Was she trying to hint at something?

He could hear, faintly in the back of his mind, a voice that sounded a lot like Tommy chanting something that sounded a lot like “make a move.” What better a moment than this would even exist? 

There was a fly away ginger hair sticking up from the wind. Danny reached out and tucked it behind her ear. His skin felt electric as he tried to ignore the heaviness of his breathing, the shake of his hands.

“Maybe that’s why we’re so close. All the...sustained eye contact from studying.” He wanted to say something else. Anything else. But the words were caught in his throat and all he could do was look at her like she was the only person he had ever seen in his life.

And maybe she was.

[danny-logan]

camxwhite​:

~

Count on Danny to read her like an open book. It’s her own fault for being so open with him, really. Of course he can tell when she’s not okay. Hell, she knows she looks disheveled. Anyone who studied her for more than a few moments would know that she’s not okay, which isn’t a bad thing. Being not okay is expected, especially given her own issues with being locked up the way she was. But, it doesn’t make it any less embarrassing to stand out on the sidewalk like this.

She lets out a shaky sigh, nodding. “I know… I’m… you know, here.” Okay wasn’t really what she would use to describe her current state, but being on the other side of the jail cell, and back with people who cared was a big step in the right direction. There were other issues that were ever present, like how she was meant to defend herself against this to avoid jail time, but that was an issue to deal with in the future. 

Settling back into the embrace, she laughs despite herself as he lists off his to do list of impulsive plans that she was, apparently, meant to keep contained as his best friend. “Well, guess I got out just in time, then. You would have been busy without me.”

“Can I crash at yours tonight? I’m not sure I’m entirely prepared to face down Hanna on this yet.”

--------------------

Danny feels it bubbling in his chest, that desire and need to be upfront and honest with her about the terrible thing he’s done to keep her safe. She’s going to blame herself. She’s going to try to run back into the prison cell and reverse time. She’s going to be upset.

But for now, she doesn’t have to worry about any of that. He will tell her later, at another time, when he is not so worried that if the universe breaths on her wrong she might shatter into a million pieces right in front of him.

“You are. You’re here and that’s what matters.” 

He reaches down and tangles their hands together as they start to walk towards his car. “Oh yeah. You came just in time to stop an impending disaster.” She didn’t though. The disaster has come and they are in the eye of the storm now. She doesn’t need to know that now. “Babe, if you didn’t crash at my place for the next two months I would be so offended. This is as much for you as it is for me.”

[danny-logan]

darcywarren​:

+

Though Darcy had been thankful that Danny hadn’t teased her for the statistic she’d so easily tossed out, his lighthearted questioning of the specific number was a good reminder that such knowledge was, in fact, one of her weird little quirks and not more common knowledge.

Had she brought down the more optimistic mood with her morbidity?

After all, while Danny’s conclusion was a horrifying thought… is was entirely possible that on some level he was correct. It was not unlikely that toddler deaths did contribute to the number of fatalities. Parents bringing children on rides they’re too small for… tragedy striking.

How sobering.

“I assume that the .3 is for the variance from year to year. Do you think that a toddler is a third of a person?” she decided to ask to keep the hope of a good time alive, her eyes trained steadily on the male next to her for reassurance as they teetered back and forth in the air.

If they had been anywhere else, it probably would have been enough.

“Mmm. Something to look forward to. I suppose we can’t die up here when we have that next on the agenda. If only-” she was about to continue when the ride stuttered into motion yet again.

On instinct, her arm shot out to grab onto anything that could assure her safety.

Perhaps it hadn’t been the most realistic to reach for Danny, but she hadn’t registered her hand clutching his arm until it was far too late to play it off.

“Sorry,” she apologized, eyes squeezing shut to center herself, even if only for a moment. “I genuinely thought this would be fun. Maybe it was stupid, but I got the sense that the ferris wheel might be a favorite of yours.”

-----------------------

Darcy’s ability to turn anything and everything into a statistic was one of her more endearing qualities in his mind. He thought it was cool how she always had numbers for something. Where he had useless quotes from Greek philosophers, she had actual information that brought new light to a situation. If he was ever on an abandoned island, his personal item would be Darcy.

“I think a toddler is a full person. I think middle schoolers are a third of a person though. I think there’s some sort of fundamental genetic change that happens at that point in your life and it’s like when caterpillars get their insides blended like a frozen margarita in the cocoon.” 

Down below he could see a few kids causing chaos. One of them was trying to distract a bored, underpaid teenager from the game stand long enough to steal one of the teddy bears.

All of a sudden, she was reaching out to grab him as the ride rocked forward in a way that made even his stomach roll uncomfortably. The touch burnt his skin but not in a way he wasn’t used to. Every time she touched him it was like this: a crackle under his skin of what could be but probably never would; like when you start to spark a fire and it seems for a moment it might light before nothing comes out but smoke.

“It is my favorite. That didn’t mean you had to force yourself up here though.” Danny took her hands in his and turned to face her. “Hey, look at me alright. You don’t have to look anywhere else but at me. We can talk about literally whatever you want right now. What’s the newest research study you’ve read? Have you done any fun clinical trials at Logancorp I should be caught up on before I show up for my Monday shift?”

[danny-logan]

valentinagarridos​:

for@danny-logan​​

Valentina finds him sitting on one of those picnic tables the organizers pulled out of storage for the festival. It’s covered in a checkered cloth reminiscent of the one they’d spent so much of their time on in high school; in truth, the tables are always covered in the same ratty cloth but right now, the parallel makes her laugh. She’d come across the sight countless times before.

“Penny for your thoughts?” She asks, holding a stick of cotton candy in Danny’s direction. Val had bought the thing on a whim and, after picking a bit off the top to taste, decided that it just wasn’t for her. If she remembered correctly, the spun sugar was something Danny liked and she wasn’t going to finish it anyhow, so why let it go to waste? Call it a kindness of opportunity, or something along those lines. “How far along are you on your journey to meet god?” And then the unspoken question, how are you holding up?

From the outside looking in, Danny’s boat was slowly sinking, having hit one iceberg after the other and Val wasn’t enjoying the spectacle. Maybe she’d offer him some fried Oreos too— thought it’d pain her to be anywhere near that monstrosity of a booth. There was no amount of justifying people’s addiction to deep frying things…Val had even passed by a booth serving deep fried butter and that had nearly been her last straw. 

---------------------

Being at the fourth festival felt strange in nearly every way. It was a bizarre moment of peace: a single island sitting in the midst of an endless ocean. Every part of him said he needed to be up, doing something, anything to help piece together the puzzle of his life. The only problem was he had lost so many parts he wasn’t sure where to start anymore. Could he even make a picture worth looking at with no many empty gaps?

He looks up at Valentina’s words and tilts his head curiously in her direction. He smiles though, because this is Val and for some reason they have fallen so easily into something resembling a tentative friendship. He doesn’t think they were even friends when they were dating. They were just a tragic representation of the crumbling Coolsville collective.

It feels bad though, looking at her now, because he remembers the night he told her he was getting away and she told him she wouldn’t come with him. He really thought he’d clawed his way from the depths of hell and managed to stand on his own too feet.

Really, he should have known the ground would crumble out from underneath him.

“You were right,” he says softly, taking the candy from her grasp. It’s sugary and sweet as it melts on his tongue and he remembers the first time he ever gave Dani some. It’s a bitter thought to swallow. “People like us...we don’t get out of it. I don’t know why I even bothered to try.”

Danny doesn’t elaborate, but he gets the feeling she probably knows what he’s saying.

[danny-logan]

camxwhite​:

~

Most of the time, Danny picking her up would have been met by a sea of colorful profanities, and smacks to the back until he relented and placed her back on solid ground. But, this time it was welcome. The security she found in him was exactly what was needed after so long at the mercy of her own thoughts. 

Her feet meet solid ground again, and she’s released only long enough for Danny’s hands to find her face. He’s holding her like she might break, and maybe she will if he keeps looking at her like that, but she needs to try to hold it together for a little bit longer. 

She shakes her head, grabbing a little too desperately at the hands on her face, doing her best to train her eyes downwards in an effort to hide any sort of swollen, puffy, post-crying tells. “I’m okay. No one hurt me.”

The last time someone was there to catch her after coming out of a situation like this, she was eight. Now it was Danny, and if there was ever anymore need for confirmation that he was her family, this was it. “Thank you. For being here. I don’t think I even realized how badly I needed to see you.”

------------

Danny can tell from the way that she’s acting, the way her eyes refuse to meet his, the gentle puff of her skin, that Cam is not doing well. He can tell that whatever happened, it wasn’t good and she doesn’t feel good and she might not feel good for a really long time. For now, he decides the best thing he can do is be here, an unwavering support of a rock against a rocky and rough sea.

“No one hurting you isn’t the same as being okay,” he says softly and presses a gentle kiss to her forehead, finally dropping his hands so she doesn’t feel so overwhelmed by his entire existence.

The very idea that he might not have been here for her is insane to him. This is Cameron and she is his best friend in the entire world. She has saved him from terrible spirals so many times he can’t even really count anymore.

“Major ditto on that one, Cami.” Danny sighs and holds her close again. It feels good to just be able to touch her, to know she is here and she is okay. Mostly okay at least. “I was moments away from joining a pyramid scheme, selling a kidney, and trying a back alley drug. What am I supposed to do without my impulse control?”

He is trying, somewhat desperately, to keep the mood light, lest they both collapse against each other in a ball of tears.

[danny-logan]

darcywarren​:

​Darcy had seen the way Danny’s eyes lit up when he saw the ferris wheel.

They had barely spent ten minutes together wandering around the festival when they’d come across it. She’d clocked it instantly. And she’d made a decision.

His life had been pretty miserable lately. With his missing sister and his parents forcing him to work for a company that he had no interest in (even if she, personally, was excited to be able to see him daily), Darcy believed that Danny was in need of every possible moment of joy that he could get.

So she’d suggested they ride the ferris wheel, perhaps too enthusiastic in her ask to the point where it could be considered suspicious. But Danny had never said no to her, and (as predicted) he’d acquiesced.

With no line, they’d been able to walk right up and hand their tickets over, several dollars in exchange for the best view of Coolsville, even if only for a moment.

They’d been seated in the blue carriage, a small cage lacking in seatbelts with room truly only for two (maybe even only one). And then they’d been locked in.

The ride began to move seconds later.

“Oh, um-” she started, turning towards Danny with panic in her eyes as soon as the ride shuddered to a stop to allow for more riders to depart. They were barely a few feet off the ground, but that fact was somehow not calming.

“Did you know that there are approximately 4.3 amusement park ride fatalities per year? Because I did.”

@danny-logan​​

---------------------------

Danny was sort of becoming familiar with the feeling of getting kicked in the teeth over and over and over again. It was, honestly, sort of a nightmare that he was growing numb too. His sister was still missing, Cam had barely escaped prison time, and now he had taken sixteen steps backwards in his own independence and was back working at Logancorp. 

Everything about this week had sucked so badly.

Except for right now, when he was walking around the Coolsville fourth of July festival with Darcy Warren of all people, hands so close he could practically feel the tension there. Danny didn’t reach out and touch but it would be stupid to lie and say he didn’t want to.

When she suggested the ferris wheel, it felt more like fate’s intervention than anything else. He wondered, briefly, if she had been possessed. Still, this was too good of an opportunity to pass up, Tommy’s words ringing in his ear. Maybe if he was lucky the ride would start playing The Little Mermaid and he might actually make a move.

“4.3?” Danny asked with a crooked smile, “Is the .3 like a toddler?”

Most people would be off put by what she had said, but he was well accustomed to Darcy’s propensity for saying scientific facts and statistics whenever she felt unsure of herself and didn’t know what else to say.

“If you were scared though, we didn’t have to come on here. You didn’t even play a rigged game and win me a stuffed animal yet,” he teased.