I'll never stop believing

Hey, I'm Darren. I'm pretty old. I'm from San Fran. I've been Harry Potter, an annoying kid who uses too much hair gel, prince Eric, Hedwig, Andrew Cunanan, and a bunch of other people. I have pigs. (rp fake)

[darrenfckncriss]

unfollow please

[darrenfckncriss]

mama-selenitaxo‌:

I woke up to everybody’s nudes –like,  morning to you too dang. Lesbhonest you guys are living for this, but I’m over here like franticly deleting my nudes now cause nobody wants to see these rolls besides Gigi. 

Oh thank God, I’m not the only one this happened to. It’s not my first time, but I think I could’ve done without these being leaked.

[darrenfckncriss]

mama-hailz‌:

I tried so hard not to laugh because he’s so cute and I didn’t want to embarrass him but as soon as I got home and told his dad we died. Oh just wait until you have your own and they’re with their grandparents and you get that phone call “WHY ARE YOU TEACHING THEM TO CUSS WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU” and inwardly you have to remind yourself not to laugh. It’s happened to Cal and I one too many times. 

Hilarious. Can’t wait, I’ll own up to it. I feel like that’ll be a hard personal thing for me. I drop the F bomb left and right here at home, I feel sorry for my future kids. 

[darrenfckncriss]

mama-hailz‌:

So Travis and I went to go get McDonalds for everyone for dinner, and on the way home he looked at me and said “mommy, you’re a savage.” but he pronounces savage like, “sabbage” – kinda like cabbage, but he had fries in his mouth so it sounded like, “mommy, you’re a sad bitch.” to which I thought, “yes son, yes I am.” 

That’s funny, I would’ve been rolling. It’s always funny when kids accidentally cuss. 

[darrenfckncriss]

nessaxmorgan‌:

It was funny, and inappropriate. Snorting is the only reaction I wanted. I mean if you have room for a horse you have room for a zebra.

No room for the horse, but I’ll happily build a stable.

[darrenfckncriss]

daddymclifford‌:

Hell yeah! We did a show for a documentary that we were shooting and they asked us if we wanted fire. Of course, we were like hell yeah fire! We didn’t really rehearse with it and I was too close. 

Amazing, that’s really cool. Any serious injuries? Kinda reminds me of Michael Jackson’s Pepsi accident.

[jkeslassy]

Summer Storm

[darrenfckncriss]

madspetschq‌:

“ Thanks! “ She said, smiling before she nodded. “ Totally ready. Oh my god, now I hope so too. “

Darren smiled brightly. “What’s your favorite kind?”

[darrenfckncriss]

@maiamitchell: @DarrenCriss I'm so sad that I missed this! 🤦‍♀️

@DarrenCriss: You were missed!

[darrenfckncriss]

@DarrenCriss: What a productive weekend of drinking and fun with friends!

[darrenfckncriss]

shcwnmvndcs‌:

Honestly, I’ve done nothing but try to surf during this BBQ and I’ve concluded that although I have the hair for a surfer dude, I will never accomplish being one. I’ll just stick to my guitar and crooning love songs for a living. Did anyone else check out the activities?

I did about the same. A very chill weekend, for sure. Didn’t try to surf, thankfully. Don’t know how well that would’ve gone over, after all.

[darrenfckncriss]

mama-cierra‌:

Tanning is amazing. Plus with a drink in your hand? Even better. Mateo also got into the sunscreen and he drew a monster or tried too on my stomach then looks at me and goes, “RAWR!” Such a little weirdo but he’s cute. Anyways, how is everyone’s day going?

How cute. My day’s going good. I agree, at least with the drink part. Everyone could use a drink or two in their hand, especially in the sun.

[darrenfckncriss]

daddymclifford‌:

But I do know how to make a good ass grilled cheese and shockingly got on fire once but that wasn’t from cooking. 

Good for you. Independence for the win. How did you catch on fire?

[darrenfckncriss]

nessaxmorgan‌:

That be awesome, I think we’d both like that a lot. Oh those names are amazing! Don’t say that to everyone someone might get the wrong idea. If you get what I mean.

Shouldn’t have snorted at that. Of course not. People are amazing, all shapes and sizes. I don’t have room for a zebra either or a giraffe, but I don’t think anyone does, haha.

[darrenfckncriss]

rossbutlerhq‌:

Yeah? That sounds awesome- I’ll pay you a drink before we start. Was there a game that you wanted to try first?

Thanks! Anything you want is good with me, not a picky dude.

[darrenfckncriss]

kccabcllo‌:

“pizza is always a good choice. as much as i love italian food, there goes nothing above cuban and mexican food. those are really my favorite,” she admitted. “but i’m always open to try something new.”

“Sounds amazing,” Darren agreed. “Me too."

[darrenfckncriss]

nessaxmorgan‌:

I think it’s safe to say I’m excited to here about the pigs. Holden loves pigs too. I think a cow would just be a little odd.

Maybe your kid can meet them sometime. Their names are Piggle and Piggsley. They’re sisters. We like to keep it in the family here. Yeah, I agree. I don’t exactly have room for a cow.