David Cameron Pretending to be Common

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In a nod to his felonious Bullingdon days, David Cameron uses the gangster term "sick" in order to describe his restaurant-smashing kindred spirits.

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David Cameron is photographed dismantling the NHS brick by brick. His press adviser remains unfazed by the evidence as Cameron is wearing a shirt which is not 100% cotton.

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Watch David Cameron as he touches the hand of a lowly constituent without the aid of gloves or antibacterial gel. Heart-warming.

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Staying true to his working-class roots, David Cameron defies his wife's wishes by picking IKEA over Clarice Cliff. Only a common man could enjoy the blue-collar thrill of visiting a store without ceiling tiles.

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You can now "Like" David Cameron Pretending to be Common on Facebook.

We don't even have the minimal 25 fans needed to recieve a URL. That is how common we are.

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David Cameron woos an NHS nurse with his anecdote about Boris Johnson using the wrong sized dessert spoon for elevenses. Doris is not working class enough to understand this joke and waits impatiently for a bedpan.

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A Conservative publicist steers David Cameron towards a more suitable PR setting after his loud proclamation "I like this graffiti because it is like Caravaggio for urban people"

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In unwitting preparation for future coalition encounters with Nick Clegg, David Cameron spends the day handling excess waste.

Observe the skilful way in which he moves that cardboard from point A to point B. Those are surely not the hands of an Etonian. 

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Lovely but unnecessary words. We all have a duty to remind ourselves of the Tory's constant commitment to the the working class. There is no need for praise; just fulfilling this much needed duty is reward in itself.

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David Cameron enjoys some shop-based banter. It's cashier humour. You probably aren't common enough to understand.

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David Cameron attempts to distance himself from his upper-class predilection for Chateau Prieure Luchine Margaux by eyeing up a refreshing bottle of WKD in public.

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In this charming photograph, David Cameron uses his low earnings to stockpile budget vegetables.

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David Cameron casually crosses the underground gap without the aid of his servant. So common. It's almost as if he went to a comprehensive. 

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David Cameron enjoys a working class beverage with an inferior proletariat.

That's just the kind of guy he is.

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It's opposite day in a Wolverhampton supermarket, as an ethnic youth looks judgementally at an upper-class white man.

That's just the way down-to-earth-David operates.

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David Cameron is like a chameleon. Watch as he blends seamlessly into his new urban surroundings.

Almost unrecognisable.