THIS BLOG IS NOW ARCHIVED.
This blog has now been archived !
I'm slowly working on moving things over to the new blog, so for people who want to pre-emptively follow, you can find me on dawnled.

if i look back, i am lost
taylor price
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@dawnled-a
THIS BLOG IS NOW ARCHIVED.
This blog has now been archived !
I'm slowly working on moving things over to the new blog, so for people who want to pre-emptively follow, you can find me on dawnled.
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[Β ππππππΒ ] β sender and receiver walk through the sewers to escape capture / avoid detection / @herocarved !
it's not the first time he's found himself in a situation like this, but it's one of the rarer times he's found himself here with---- company, at least of the positive kind.
their footsteps echo off the walls, reverberating & sounding even louder in the silence, the only other noise being the passive flow of water below the sewer pathways. they've been walking for who knows how long now, too tense to speak, afraid that any bit of conversation to alleviate the pressure will somehow alert the hunters to their presence.
they eventually come to a ladder which should lead them above ground, & riku thinks he knows where they'll end up once they do - but the sudden sound of footsteps, the sight of shadows in the distance, makes him take pause. he raises a hand instantly, to let sora know to be silent, before grabbing his wrist & tucking them into a shadowed alcove.
if the minutes up until now had been tense, the seconds while the voices & shadows pass is terrifying -- they go unnoticed, luckily, among the silence & the smell, though both of them seem to be of the same mind in waiting much longer than is necessary before exhaling any louder than a whisper.
the alcove isn't tight, but it's comfortable, to the point riku misses sora's warmth, the press of his heartbeat, once he takes two steps away - it's cute, how he pokes his head out cautiously to check that they really are alone, even if it is also dangerous - but judging by the softening of his shoulders, they can afford to make a little bit of noise.
"you alright?"
some might expect he would be more worried about the treasure, about making it out with the things they were risking their lives for - but he's no monster ; of course he's worried about his companion.
of course he's worried about sora, & wants to make sure he's safe.
"let's get out of here - i know a good place where we can lay low for a while."
random inbox things // always accepting
@dawnled asked: β you know, iβve rarely seen snow before . sora , kairi & i lived on tropical islands as kids , so it was never cold enough . β
Anna's brows raised in peaked curiosity, having no memory of Sora making mention of islands during his last visit to Arendelle but judging by how cold the poor boy was throughout his previous time in the kingdom, the Queen honestly wasn't too surprised by the statement.
"Guess we're opposites then! I've never really seen warm islands before.", Anna remarked with a light chuckle. "I remember at one point wishing Elsa had tropical magic. I would love to see some sandy beaches and warm suns. Don't get me wrong! Arendelle's wonderful and it does get warm here but it's still the mountains so, let's just say; Snow is our specialty! Especially with Elsa around."
She looked out over the kingdom with a fondness that warmed her heart and yet a longing that broke it. How she wished she could travel as Sora, Riku and his friends did. To see the world she had often read about as a child. But her duty was to Arendelle, so Arendelle is where she would remain.
"What's your island like? Is it big? Small? Are there sea turtles? Is the water as clear as they say?" As she often did, Anna began her questioning at a break-neck pace but fortunately for Riku, she was quick to realize the fault and cased her ramblings. "Ahem, sorry. That's not why you're here. You're here because of Sora, right? I'm really sorry but I haven't seen him since the last time he visited. He was a big help to us! We sure could have used him around when Elsa was hearing voices.", the Queen laughed awkwardly, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. "How long has he been gone for?"
it's interesting, to be in the company of someone with such an opposing homestyle ---- he's been to all sorts of worlds, yes, has seen all sorts of climates; but perhaps it's the Islander in him, in his body & blood, that always makes him default to warmer climates.
to be in a world like this, full of snow in all corners he's seen, is something new ---- being able to speak to the locals, even if not under the best circumstance, even more so.
anna reminds him a lot of sora - even if the comparison hurts, just a little bit, her enthusiasm is infectious, her cascade of questions a bit of a flurry to the mind, but one he's able to parse near-easily due to his best friend's habit of the same.
it's---- nice, to be in that kind of company again ---- even when he & sora had been together lately, it had always been scarce, short reprieve in the middle of war; & while this isn't entirely different - the war is over, yes, but the search for sora is very much ongoing - at least the worlds are largely at peace.
( for now, the pessimistic part of his mind supplies, which he tries to shove away without letting it show on his face. )
he smiles, just a little bit, at her jokes, her entourage of inquiries, though the last makes him a bit more sober - he thins his lips, passes a moment of silence to think of what to say, & eventually speaks.
"it's---- been a few months, now. he went to save a friend of ours, & while she returned---- he didn't. we've been searching all over, to see if he ended up somewhere he was before, & just can't get home."
would that it was that simple, that they would be that lucky -- but with each passing day, week, month, the panic & concern settle in a little more. would they have to broaden their search to completely new worlds? with so many out there, how would they possibly find him, with all of the worlds so large & grand?
but then, among all the panicking thoughts, riku would remember - sometimes all they needed was a little bit of faith.
his heart and his mind were made up, back then. they just had to believe in him.
sora was capable of making miracles happen, even if accidentally.
"if you haven't seen him yet - maybe just keep an eye out. & if you do see him, just-- tell him we're looking for him. we're trying to set up communications for everyone so they can contact us even from-- far away."
& there's a little bit more of a pause, as he refers back to her words--
"----your sister was hearing voices? was there any danger?"
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[Β ππππΒ ] β sender helps clean receiver after a long day / stressful situation / @herocarved !
the life they now lived may be one filled with anxiety, paranoia, constantly looking over their shoulders & choosing who they trusted very carefully, if they chose to trust anyone at all - but it was bliss, compared to the cold, stoic life of royalty they'd lived before.
never again would they be captured & forced back into that life - even if they were forced back into it together.
this particular day leaves him tired, weary, worn, barely having the energy to put his coat on the back of the couch & leave his clothes in a pile on the bathroom floor. the water takes too long to warm, too long to fill, but eventually, it does, & every muscle in him aches as he submerges himself in its depths.
the lavender scent from the randomly-chosen fizzer is soothing, filling the bath with bubbles & a light purple hue, & riku dares to tilt his head back against the bath's rim, eyes slipping to a close as he exhales. he could easily fall asleep, he knows, but he's careful - so much so that the slightest creak of the door makes one eye open, teal depths following a shadow's movement.
he'd thought sora had gone out with kairi & aqua, to explore the city's market square - but there he is, a fresh pile of riku's clothes in hands, which he gently places upon the bath-side table. there's silence, for a few moments, as their eyes meet---- & then the tension riku didn't realise he'd begun to hold again bleeds out into the water, shoulders loosening, breath passing from his lips.
"i thought you went out to the markets."
he's greeted properly by a kiss, one that lasts perhaps a few seconds too long for most, & is undoubtedly wetter than it should be because of his disposition - but he drowns in it gladly, tilts his head back to make it more comfortable, raising a hand from the water ( & mindfully pressing it against the towel he'd placed on the same bath-side table to dry it ) before cupping it to sora's cheek, rubbing a familiar, soothing circle.
if the bath was relaxing, the kiss is like a breath of new life, even if it steals his breath away - & once they part, he can't help but think hec could easily stare into sora's eyes for the rest of forever, if the universe would so let him.
"i wanted to be here when you got back - i figured you'd be tired."
how it is that sora always seems to know everything about him, he can't explain - but he assumes it's the same way he seems to know sora in turn, like a little connection between them, infinite & inexplicable.
he can't say he's surprised at sora's decision to stay by his side here - they both got particularly clingy when away from each other for any period of time - even if it was in the bathroom ( it wasn't like they hadn't seen each other in any & all states of undress before, after all ) but what is slightly surprising is the way he drags a nearby stool to the bath, seating himself upon it & taking riku's favoured shampoo bottle in hand. it's intimate in some other way than they're used to, & yet, riku can't find himself able to look away.
the only time he does so is when sora seems ready - he closes his eyes, shifts himself so sora can work easily, tilts his head forward, back, left, right, whenever sora's hands seem to need him to, & if anyone ever doubted sora's gentleness, his care, they need only refer to moments like this to see all of the undoubtful good in him.
it's a moment that leaves riku more emotional than he expected, if he's being honest - his throat feels tight by the time sora's done, & though the water has gone slightly colder, it's still an overall comfort.
sora has been so good to him, has done so much for him, even when he was at his lowest, trying to cut himself off during their dark days of recapture----
sometimes, riku wonders what he has done to deserve him.
"thank you."
Could you do a silver/arctic mermaid moodboard?
Tysm!!!! Hereβs a chilly mermaid moodboard for u :) π¨π
Olivia Laing, from The Lonely City.
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[Β πππππΒ ]Β βΒ sender inhales receiverβs scent / @herocarved !
most ghouls might not remember the initial struggle of being among humans when they were young, but riku does. maybe it's because he was always mature for his age, spent so much time being paranoid of fitting in, the danger of being discovered---- but mostly, he remembered being worried about sora finding out, of not wanting to be his friend anymore.
that worry had followed him through most of his life, though by the time he hit his later teens, he was confident in his ability to blend in. he could eat small amounts of food at a time ( even if his body regretted it later ), & he liked the taste of coffee beyond the sustenance it provided. he was able to spend his days by his best friend's side, & patrol the streets at night, making sure no ghoul or government harm would come to him.
some might say it was a conflict of interest - if there was danger to sora & his family both, who would he rather save? - but he would argue that his family knew where his priorities lay.
that sora was his everything.
never did he think that sora would have to go through that same kind of struggle - why would he, when he knew sora was human? - but, now, here they were, curled up together so tightly it was difficult to tell where one of them ended & the other began.
the bed creaks with their weight as riku adjusts his back against the wall, their merged shadows illuminated by the moonlight streaming in from the window just above them. it's silent, save for the distant noise of the cafΓ© downstairs, cleaning up just after closing, & sora's hyperventilating, which is painful for riku to hear.
he wasn't that surprised, when sora told him long ago that riku's scent was a comfort to him - sora's scent was the same to him, after all, something that reminded him of hope, home, all his happiest memories - but it's moments like this where riku remembers the true impact of that statement, now. he's pressed his face so tightly against riku's collarbone that riku has to wonder if he can even breathe properly - but he's too gentle to pull him away, & the thought of the whine that would undoubtedly reach his ears if he tried breaks his heart in two.
so, he lets him stay; brushes a hand softly through his hair in slow, rhythmic motions, doesn't flinch as hands clench & unclench against his shirt, or as puffs of hot air press against his shoulder. his eyes drift to the ceiling, almost mindlessly, with the occasional press of a kiss to sora's crown in comfort.
what was once his burden to shoulder was now theirs to share - but when it came to sora, loving, helping, supporting him, he would have it no other way, no matter what he may want or need.
"i love you. i'll always be here for you. i promise."
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[Β ππππππΒ ] β sender lights a scented candle for receiver / @herocarved !
infusing magic into the charms he makes takes time, effort, concentration, as well as a large amount of magic in & of itself. to anyone looking from the outside, it may not look like riku's doing anything other than closing his eyes & holding the charm between his fingertips -- but it's a lengthy process, requiring patience & skill.
normally, he focuses his mind on what he wants the charm to represent, the imagery he wants it to embody - safety, home, protection - whether that be in people, things, or places.
in the corner of his mind, he notices the change in his surroundings - the mentally distant sound of footsteps, the clink of something as it's set atop his worktable, the scent of grass, trees, forests----
the charm clings to that scent, the images that come with it, before he can stop it - it takes hold & doesn't let go, no matter how hard he tries to replace those memories with the ones he had originally designed - & then, the charm is done, full to the brim with magic to the point where, if he tried to make it change, it would break, shatter into little pieces beyond even his repair.
he opens his eyes, unfurls his brows - when had they furrowed? - & stares at the little charm glowing between his fingers. it's a lush green with a tint of blue, not the full sea blue he'd been expecting, but----
there's beauty in it anyway, & if anything, its power seems stronger than he'd expected -- maybe because of sora's presence, the fact he'd been the one to place the candle down on the workbench, & the candle's effects itself. nothing within riku's home was truly without magic, after all - even the mundane items absorbed it from the things around them over time.
if it were anyone, anything, else, he might be a little mad - but trust sora to be able to take the magic in things & make them stronger.
"here,"
he eventually says, small, soft, placing the charm in the palm of sora's hand & gently curling his fingers around it - & the charm thrums, occasionally over time, like a calm, gentle heartbeat,
"i think you should have this one."
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[Β ππππΒ ] βΒ sender and receiver are in bed together while rain lashes against the windows / tent / etc / @herocarved !
as Islanders, they are both well used to the rain - though the rain they're used to is more chaotic, storm-like, monsoons in the middle of summer. the rain here, in this unreality, is more measured, more suited to the cityscape than their faraway home.
home ---- it's been something he's been thinking of, lately. it wouldn't be the first time he's thought of it, of course, but it's the most recent moment he's been wondering about it & what it means.
he's come to learn, over the last few years, that home is wherever sora is, really.
if they were to be stranded here, just the two of them -- he'd be fine with that. though the worlds back home needed them, they also had the other guardians of light now.
not that that was going to stop him from trying to get them home -- he would do anything & everything in his power to get sora back where he belonged, back to their reality.
but was it really so wrong of him, to want for them to be able to take in this moment of peace? there were still heartless here - Darksides, of all things - sure, but other than that, they've been able to live out somewhat normal lives. there's a whole new city to explore, new people & places to see, new things to learn---- even if some of those things are the basics of being adults.
because, as time has flown them by, that's what they are, now - past the cusp of teenagers, into a whole new part of their lives even though they've missed half of the previous experience.
he thinks on all these things as he lies partly on his side, watching sora under the covers inches from him; so close he could count his freckles (& has done so, many times), can see the minute twitches of his face, the rise & fall of his chest, the way his eyes gloss over, as if he's also in deep thought.
maybe he's thinking of the same things riku is, on this dark, dreary day - or maybe he's thinking of other things entirely, beyond riku's comprehension.
he can't help but raise a hand from the sheets, watching as bright blues move with it as he cups a bronzed cheek against his palm. those same blues fall to a close as he circles under one of them with his thumb, & it's like a little moment of serenity, just for the two of them.
if there's one other thing he associates with sora, besides home, it's love - love that they finally have time to share, even if it's just in little moments like these.
"i love you."
he murmurs, soft & quiet, & though it would be loud in the silence, it's nearly muted by the rain, pattering against the window - but somehow, he can tell sora hears it loud & clear, whether it's by the flutter of his lashes, the loosening of his shoulders, the flutter of adoration in his chest from their Link.
sora hears it, in any & every way, which is all riku could ever ask for.
it's a little bit late compared to everyone else on this site, but happy new year everyone !!
Assorted sketches of my Riku Design!! I like the idea that he gets to keep being a dream eater when he's asleep :}!!! Also, i love him w long hair.
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[Β ππππΒ ] β sender recognises receiver at a masquerade party / @herocarved !
he's used to all eyes being on him whenever he enters a room, is used to suspicious, cautious, wary gazes as crowds make sure to keep their distance -- but these masquerade balls are one way for him to remain among them without causing a room-wide panic.
for that, he's grateful - it allows him to just be a person for a while (of nobility, yes, but none known to others), not one cursed by a witch with eyes others would describe as toxic. it's ironic, perhaps, that by putting on a mask, he's able to do away with the mantle of a poisoned prince.
he used to just like the parties for the freedom it offered him -- never did he think he would end up looking forward to them for any other means, particularly the possibility of meeting someone. but, here he is, eyes slowly, curiously scanning the crowd for any sight of unruly cinnamon, or a sparkle of bright sky blue.
eventually he finds blue, but only because they're already looking straight at him - & the enthusiasm on sora's face will never not be surprising, he thinks, especially when it's directed at him. he's been standing by a princess with bright red hair -princess kairi from radiant garden, riku quickly identifies - but that all seems nearly forgotten now that he's seen riku.
this is all still so very new to him - the idea that someone might enjoy his presence, might even look forward to it. that he could make someone's eyes sparkle as brightly as sora's do when they land on him. that he could make someone----
no ; that someone could ever hope to like him. he would never force anyone into something like that.
they're still tip-toeing around it, just a little bit ; there's closeness, touches, hand-holding, the occasional brush of lips against one's jaw or mouth when they felt bold enough ---- but all of that was done in closed quarters, or when they were sure there was nobody else around to see.
he has to stifle the urge to do any of those things with the ballroom as an audience, & it's like an itch under his skin - but he forces it down, lets a small smile raise his lips at sora & kairi both.
"i shouldn't be surprised to see you here,"
he notes to sora, & if sora notices the small twitch of riku's lips in a half-smirk, he doesn't say anything - but maybe the glimmer in his eyes means he knows,
"& it's a pleasure to see you, your highness."
the bow he offers to the pink princess is a habit, a pleasantry, but also genuinely meant - he means her no harm or ill-will, & he knows she feels the same toward him in turn. she curtsies, elegant & beautiful as always, before excusing herself with a smile riku doesn't know what to make of -- but if sora trusts her, he trusts her, at least to an extent.
then , there's silence, just the two of them, now - but it doesn't last very long, a small bubble of laughter popping from them both.
"i'm glad you're here."
i missed you.
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[Β ππππππππΒ ] β sender takes receiver to see lanterns in the sky / @herocarved !
it had been sora's request that they go to visit corona, & though riku had seen some pictures of the place previously from his Kingstagram posts, he didn't truly understand why sora was so insistent on this world in particular.
once they made their way through the world, from the tall tower where sora had first found rapunzel, through the beautiful forests & into the kingdom itself, riku began to understand. it was all beautiful, like a breath of fresh air, bright & relaxing.
it was relieving, too, to see sora so enthusiastic - time after quadratum had been stressful for them both, trying to get back to how things used to be, how they used to be; to see him smiling, laughing, dancing with the villagers in the square, was heartwarming.
spending a day basking in the sun, walking around the kingdom & seeing all the things sora wanted him to see, was worth more than riku could put into words - so much so that he didn't do anything but raise an eyebrow when sora snuck away to a nearby merchant at some point & came back with something in a paper bag, which he wouldn't divulge even when he noticed that riku saw.
he insisted they stay until night time, which was unother unusual thing - they'd normally be on their way back to the gummiship by now, getting ready to make their way either back home, or to another world - but riku divulged him anyway, if only because it was so unusual. that, & who was he to ever deny sora something, anyway?
after all they'd been through, they deserved to relax - & riku trusted that sora knew what he was doing, that he had a plan, a reason for staying so late.
if there was one thing he had, it was trust, faith, in sora.
that's how they find themselves at the pier's edge, watching as stars fill up the night sky. they both stare at them for a long time, until something else catches riku's gaze - small lights, rising from other corners of the village pier, to which he lets out a small sound of question. he turns his eyes to sora to ask, but there it is -- a little light of their own in his hands, with the kingdom's symbolic sun painted on the lantern's fabric.
the lantern festival - now that he was seeing the lantern itself, he remembered sora telling him about it previously. maybe it was rude, or silly, for him to have forgotten, but it made the moment, the surprise, a little bit more impactful.
" they used to be for rapunzel - to help guide the lost princess home, "
he hears sora explain, eyes bright, beautiful, soft as they stare back at him,
" but now they're used to celebrate her being back where she belongs. with her family. "
& in the back of his mind, riku can't help but think that maybe this little lantern is their own symbol - their own celebration of finally being back together, being back home with & in each other - or maybe he's thinking too much into it; but looking at sora, he seems to be thinking the same.
riku can't help but smile, eyes crinkling at the corners - he might call sora a sap sometimes, all in good jest, but they were both as bad as each other.
"i'd like to help celebrate; she deserves to be home, after working so hard for it."
& raising the lantern into the sky, fingers lightly brushing over sora's own, riku can admit he feels a little extra bit of peace.
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[Β ππππππΒ ] β sender bites receiver hard enough to draw blood / @herocarved !
it's one of those nights where he's been gone for far longer than either of them are comfortable with -- it's an itch under his skin, a desperation gnawing at his bones, screaming at him to get home as soon as possible.
patrolling the town's borders is usually peaceful, for lack of a better term, but never really easy - the patrol itself is to mark his territory, so to speak, to let others know that if they dare to harm anyone within its walls, they'll face his wrath. it's necessary, after all he's been through, to keep this domain from ansem's control when he'd been a young 'ling taken under his wing, willingly or otherwise.
( it was more like being held captive, kidnapped for hundreds of years - but with no family left, nobody else to turn to, what was he to do? until, eventually, he'd had enough - that, & ansem had apparently taken amusement in his 'outburst', had left him to see how he might grow & flourish on his own. to come back, who knew when, & take pride in asserting dominance once again, using anything riku might have held dear in the meantime.
it was why riku had refused to cherish anything, for the longest time, had kept to himself for so long that the town's rumours about the ghost in the forest mansion had even begun ---- though of course, it had all come crumbling down once sora had stumbled into his life, both literally & figuratively. )
he shrugs off those thoughts while shrugging off his coat & the cold, shivering slightly at the warmth of the mansion ---- years ago, he wouldn't have bothered with it, would have been fine with the chill since it didn't bother him anyway ; but with sora around, not only was it necessary so he didn't freeze, but---- it made the place feel more like home, too.
maybe sora can tell something is troubling him, or maybe he's been away for longer than he thought - either way, there's a warm, familiar body crashing against his own once the door is firmly shut, fingers brushing, catching, in his hair, lips & tongue & teeth pressing so harshly against his own that it's jarring. teeth catch against his lip a little bit too much, & he can't help but hiss against the sting.
silence falls, sudden & swift, as they both part slightly at the shock of it -- normally it's him being accidentally aggressive, not sora ( for what harm could a human do to a vampire, really, at least physically? ), & riku doesn't need to follow sora's eyes, blue & beautiful, to know that he's drawn blood.
once the initial shock passes, he can't help but laugh, just a little bit - the smile that curls his lips splits the cut a little bit more, but he doesn't even mind - & the sound echoes loudly through the silence, despite how small it is.
sora's always so very full of surprises - particularly the good kind.
"i thought i was the vampire here."
strongly inspired by my fav comic "Sugar Sugar Rune"π
β‘ ππππππ πππππππ πππππππ ft. @sparesovereign β‘
" You're always stronger than what you think . "
he hadn't wanted to visit any of the worlds sora had been to without him there . it felt---- wrong , somehow , all the way down to his core , like he was doing something morally , ethically , fundamentally wrong by doing so .
luckily , the other guardians of light had been able to help him in that regard - without him even asking , they had taken on the mantle of exploring the other worlds , searching for sora or any sight , sound or symbol of him , using his Kingstagram posts & previous stories as guidance to where he'd been , who might know him .
however , while he had been free from the guilt of seeing most worlds , there were only so many guardians -- & so , he found himself here , in the world of Arendelle , inquiring with the world's princesses as to whether or not they had seen him .
as with most other worlds the others had been to , he'd received a negative response , but he'd also received a request to stay for a while , to sit & update the princesses on their investigation so far , anything they could do to help .
so , he had stayed - it was how he found himself here , in front of the fire , staring perhaps too deeply into the hot chocolate he'd been handed a few minutes ago .
perhaps it was some cruel fate , that he once again found himself in a snow - covered world without sora by his side -- although unlike last time , with the Land of Dragons , this time he didn't even have the luxury of being able to watch sora's journey from the shadows .
this was like a mirror reflection of that time ; back then , he was watching from the shadows , & didn't want to be found . now , he was searching in plain sight , wishing upon anything that sora could find him , or that he could find sora in turn .
fate was a cruel , fickle mistress - one that seemed to find amusement in the twists & turns she could make of his & sora's stories both .
" You're always stronger than what you think . "
the words jolt him from his reverie , hot chocolate & marshmallows stirring slightly in his cup , & his eyes drift to the princess approaching from the doorway .
strength to protect what matters - that had been the mantra , the oath , he'd been trying to live by as of late . sora's absence , however , had been a heavy blow to that ; if he couldn't protect sora , his best friend , who had been with him in some manner or another through everything , the one who truly mattered most out of everyone---- then who , or what , could he protect ?
" Sometimes I wonder . "
it's not spoken bitterly , just somberly ; but he knows anna is simply trying to help , & he appreciates it all the same ,
" But---- thank you . I'm--- sorry to worry you with my visit . I know Sora helped you & your sister . "