I am withering.
But I’m trying to focus. I’m trying to better myself and improve.
I need to work on those things that I’ve always done. The mistakes I always make.
I need to stop having reasons to say I’m sorry. I need to be dependable and commit myself to what that means.
I need to stay firm in my loyalties. I must be trustworthy and deserving of what matters to me.
I need to communicate. Not use my feelings as a weapon. Or withhold them like currency so limited.
I need to slow down. And listen. Let people speak their truths without trying to steamroll my own over them. Interrupting is unacceptable.
Everyone deserves their moment to express what they need. It’s up to me to allow them that. I need to listen and be open to what others ask of me.
I need to truly look at how my actions and intentions affect those I care about. I cannot ignore the reality that my choices hurt others.
Most of all I need to be honest and completely upfront. With the people that I care about but also with myself.
I must strive to make these changes within myself. I’ve lived too much of my life with poor habits in my relationships. And it’s led to negative experiences and let downs.
Most of all if I want to be with people who truly mean the world to me I need to be a complete person for them. I can’t focus on the negativity and all of my hurt. There’s too much. And what I want matters so much more.
Here we go I guess. 🤷♂️
I need to learn how to get by even though I’m broken.
