jack kelly newsifying katherine plumber for u today

Andulka
No title available

No title available
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

No title available
occasionally subtle
hello vonnie
Peter Solarz
$LAYYYTER

Janaina Medeiros
Cosmic Funnies

shark vs the universe
YOU ARE THE REASON

JBB: An Artblog!
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

No title available
taylor price

titsay
seen from France

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from Germany

seen from Mexico

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia

seen from Indonesia

seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from Germany
@deafclintb
jack kelly newsifying katherine plumber for u today
HELP
Hi I’m your dog I just took a big huge drink of water from my bowl can I please put my snout on your cell phone please onto your cell phone I want to lay my snout on your cell phone that’s in your hand with my wet mouth and chin. On your cell phone that’s. Please
“should tumblr have a cut off age” i think we should be recruiting from nursing homes and senior citizen centers actually
my future mutuals (rosemary, barbara and harold) are going to create the kind of textposts you could only dream of making
lets be muddy with mama
(reply to the kroger & walmart chicken fettucine alfredo listeria outbreak)
hey holy shit. the sound I made when I read this. this is exactly why the chicken fettucine recall is so scary, it is such a huge comfort food and a bunch of folks eat it while pregnant. I am so fucking glad my post found you and that you got medical attention right away.
yours is an example of doing exactly the right thing: listeria is especially dangerous while pregnant, and there are antibiotics that can be prescribed for high-risk folks during the early stages of symptoms or even before symptoms begin. and while listeria can take up to 80 days to cause illness, it can also cause issues within hours or days of eating contaminated food.
for you and for everyone else trying to avoid the general news right now, here is a list to help keep up with recalls and foodborne illness outbreaks in the united states since I do not post all of them:
FDA recall list (food, drug, medical device, etc recalls with press announcements, usually bigger food recalls have announcements)
FDA enforcement reports (more recalls go here, but more difficult to navigate than the recall list with announcements)
USDA FSIS recall list (they cover different food than FDA, especially meat. the chicken fettucine alfredo recall was posted here)
NHTSA recall list (vehicles, car seats, tires, and equipment recalls!)
CPSC recall and safety warning list (products! there have been a LOT of recalls of baby stuff recently!)
FDA outbreak investigations (you can see the status of outbreaks as they happen and get investigated, this is often where recalls start)
CDC active investigations of foodborne illness outbreaks (outbreaks can have both an FDA page and a CDC page. they cover different information)
foodsafetynews (news about food safety ONLY! not a government source. mostly focused on the US and canada, but also news around the world. some of what they post involves commentary on the current administration, BUT they post about bigger and more relevant recalls that wind up in the ever-tricky FDA enforcement reports.)
best of luck to you and your baby, and make sure you get plenty of rest!!!!!
having anti punitive justice morals sucks because you want to say "man that guy sucks he should get hit with hammers until he dies" but you also want to make it clear you don't think anyone should be put in charge of the 'hit people with hammers until they die" machine.
i notice that i and many people in my area tend to omit the "to be" in phrases like "the cats need to be fed" and "your kid wants to be held" but i don't thiiink it's standard english and i'm curious if it is a regionalism or what
do you tend to omit the "to be" in those types of phrases
no, and i've never heard that done before
no, but i've heard others do it
yes, i do that on some occasions
yes, i do that by default
bonus: say what you voted and add what general region you're from/what dialect of english you speak (if you feel comfortable doing so)
i feel like counter-trolling is an essential skill that kids online aren’t learning and it’s kinda worrying
like back in my day, the day of online forums, learning how to trick someone in to getting themselves banned was an essential skill. if you could tell someone was a chud, you would ask them short, leading questions and watch them get frustrated and post longer and longer rants until they said something that would catch a mod’s attention and get them banned and/or at least publicly humiliated.
and guess what? that’s the exact same tactics the alt-right use now. these people are exclusively acting in bad faith. every interaction these people post online is done with the intention of getting someone to respond to them so they can screenshot the massive paragraphs of text and laugh
so, what’s the solution?
dare ‘em to post dick pics.
don’t acknowledge the content of the stuff they post. if you see someone trying to engage you in bad faith just dare them to post pictures of their penis until they either get frustrated and leave or get frustrated and do it. either way they lose.
this is the tactic used by the fans of a podcast (that i haven’t listened to) called the Chapo Trap House, and 4chan’s /pol/ users fucking HATE them. they hate Chapo Trap House and think they’re crazy because Chapo Trap House fans refuse to engage in meaningful debate and repeatedly demand dick pics. they get frustrated and leave. it works.
Some of you never used your position as a mod on an a series of unfortunate events forum to get a racist troll to post evidence of their tax fraud and it shows
…that second comment is oddly specific and I’m a little scared
I watched someone get a bunch of cops banned on twitter by repeatedly replying to them saying that all cops have small dicks and that’s why they went into the police force.
Eventually the enraged pigs posted their hogs and got instantly banned
so if the smoke coming out of the vatican is blue then it's a boy pope, and if it's pink it's a girl pope?
fondly remembering when pope francis said he hopes hell is empty. top pope francis moments. right up there with him saying some seminaries are too faggy
i love illegal immigration like yes bitch get in here
they love me because I be saying shit like alas and perchance
TELEVISION. Show me BEAUTIFUL WOMEN being VIOLENT
S I G H H H H
Oh, to be a dragon from a 15th century German Jewish manuscript wearing a long, silly hat.
Do you like Elf (2003) with Will Ferrell?
Yes, I LOVE it! Yes, I like it! I'm neutral/it didn't make a big impression. No, I don't like it. No, I HATE it. Never seen it/don't remember/otherwise bald
(it gives me horrible second hand embarrassment, so I refuse to watch it again, but it seems popular.)
Do you like Elf (2003) with Will Ferrell?
Yes, I LOVE it!
Yes, I like it!
I'm neutral/it didn't make a big impression.
No, I HATE it.
Never seen it/don't remember/otherwise bald