Dear Thirsty Boys, You're Failing.

A Tumblr for me and my friends to share messages from FetLife boys who seem to think they're "great guys" and deserve something from us. Pssst, take notes on what not to do.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Lookie lookie! Our first troll! Caught them rolling through each post and systematically leaving some boring ass negative comment -eyeroll- Can't figure out if their a Nice Guy™, or an incel. Really don't care. Blocked.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Have you met a Thirsty Boy?

Has some rando messaged you out of the blue?

Does he tell you all the “sexy” things he wants to do to you? Does he tell you how big his dick is when you certainly never asked? Does he get shitty when you say “No thanks, that’s not what I’m into”? Does he start a conversation by telling you how he wants to play Hide the Sausage?

Congratulations! You’ve encountered a Thirsty Boy. Feel free to send me messages that those Thirsty Boys somehow thought were okay conversations. Witty retorts are not required, but strongly encouraged.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

A boring day for me. I would love some submissions and anecdotes to read!

ALL INFO MUST BE BLOCKED. Images, names, usernames, or I will not share.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Happy Saturday from our dearest Jade.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

It's 6:30 am. Your alarm is ringing. How do you start your day? If you're Jade, with unsolicited nudes of some dude old enough to be your father...

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Poor Jade. It never ends.... What is it with these boys and their shitty grammar? Like that is a constant that will never die.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Fresh off the presses, I was nice, got sick of it, lectured, then blocked. God I hate Nice Guys™

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Sadly, Jade never got that bra. Creeper was just creeping for pics. So he got blocked :D Why do thirsty boys even want a band size? It's not like they know what the fuck it means. You say 1080p and they'll probably nut over your cleavage pics.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

"Schrodinger's Douchebag" someone who makes rude remarks/jokes and decides if they are joking based on your reaction.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

From Jade again. I call it: How to Get Blocked in One Simple Step

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Jade ain't got time for your shit.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

submitter: "I honestly cant with some boys"

Agreed. Like wtf is this?

[dear-thirsty-boys]

And we are back with a lovely gem from my dearest Jade! I mean, we will totally forget they you're a creep if you pretend you're normal, right?

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Basically flirting on the internet...

[dear-thirsty-boys]

An awesome submission from @spitsfirelovestender I genuinely LOL'd at this one.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

So

Even if I don’t have screenshots, as I don’t screenshot my convos often and I stumbled across this blog recently, I’ll simply re-enact it.

Random user: hello there ;3 Me: hi. How can I help you? Random user: how about taking off those clothes? ;) Me: I have a boyfriend. Random user: how about a new one? Me: I don’t fix what’s not broken. Clothes are staying on as well. Random user: I can rub through your clothes ;3 Me: via a chat? You are on the other side of the world, but nice try. Random user: I’d cross any border for you :) Me: you don’t know me, I don’t know you, but you just seem to be one of many thirsty assholes. Random user: Omg I’m just being nice stop being mean Me: If harassing someone you don’t know and trying to manipulate them into having sex with you is your definition of nice, congratulations. You are an asshole. No further explanation needed Random user: ): Me: my little brother is more mature. Bye -[username omitted] has left the chat-

_______________________

Love it. Take no shit from thirsty boys. Send me screenshots if you ever get more! :3

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Took someone back to fucking school a few weeks back!

Some back story: This fool’s account is just dick and body shots of him. No mention of being a swinger, no mention of being in a relationship. Nothing. His kik was his first and last name and I found him on Facebook in no time flat.

My best schooling to date.

[dear-thirsty-boys]

Happy Sunday! Just felt like reposting this one before bed!

[dear-thirsty-boys]

I’m pretty new to tumblr, so could you tell me if this is just me or if it’s common?

Every time I get a message from a guy on tumblr who isn’t a follower, they’re looking for someone to talk dirty to. And when I call them out, I get accused of having a chip on my shoulder.

______________________

Tumblr, tinder, fetlife, Instagram, you name it. Tbh you’ll encounter assholes like that. They’ll gaslight you, neg you, and then try and back pedal when you call them out. Sadly it often means those that are genuinely trying to make a connection safe subjected to our expectation that they’re a thirsty asshole. Keep strong and take no shit!